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Scott Christenson

Author on Reedsy Prompts since Jan, 2022

Stories (138)
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467 Followers
172 Following

138 Stories

6430 karma pts

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The Crumble Will Survive

Submitted to Contest #164

My daughter Liz’s teacher sits in our kitchen, sipping tea, and coos in a Newcastle accent, “Paul Hollywood, Oh yes!”“Paul…,” I reply in a syrupy tone. “He just exudes manliness.” “He can bake my cake,” Catherine quips and we both break out into giggles.A few minutes later I will stomp out after she says “Where I come from, Yorkshire Puddings are made with beef drippings”, and wonder if I have just ruined Liz’s school year at school over an argument about puddings.**I think back to moments earlier when things were going so well. I ...

20 likes 6 comments 6
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The Y2K Crown

Submitted to Contest #163

My brother remembered last year we played a family trivia game with Dad and his pick for a ‘last meal’ was lamb chops, so we cooked him those for dinner tonight. Lamb chops are not a common dish in Chicago. Mom found them at the gourmet supermarket in Buffalo Grove. She said it’s the least we could do.At the dinner table, all those lamb chops are grilled and arranged in a crown. Sitting behind them, Dad looks at us and announces, “Computers around the world are going to crash tomorrow. Do you realize what that means?” His voice is loud and d...

30 likes 29 comments 29
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Beverly Hills Grilled Cheese Sandwich

Submitted to Contest #162

In my gorgeous foyer in Beverly Hills, Flatman, a competing realtor, thrusts his well-dressed but tiny 5’5” sized chest out and vents bile in my direction. “You stole my listing, Losh, you piece of shit,” Flatman says, “and I was just about to invite you over for one of my famous grilled cheese sandwiches.” The words are fierce, but his face is not, a tell there will be no price to pay for my quick move with his client. Will he receive an apology from me? And would I like a grilled cheese sandwich? No and no thank you. “I guess she just...

26 likes 25 comments 25
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A Talk in Tulsa

Submitted to Contest #161

Mom’s eyes are popping out. “I wish you were never born,” she’s screaming, “If it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t be stuck here.” Maybe she’s mad I messed up on stage. Maybe she’s mad we’re in Tulsa, I don’t know. Sometimes when I make mistakes she hugs me and tells me how much she loves me, so it's hard to tell.“Get out!” she says, and then takes her angry look up another level. I back up toward the hotel room door. My neck and legs are trembling uncontrollably. I can’t think of anything to say and go into the hallway to give her space ...

27 likes 28 comments 28
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Murder at Harajuku Michi(道) Soba

Submitted to Contest #160

Jun looked at Sayako and pointed into the dining room at the customer who had come to murder him. Sayako carried over a glass of cold water and placed it in front of him.“Welcome to Michi Soba Restaurant!” she said in the spirited up tone that she used with customers, and presented him a menu. Sure, the man looked a bit rough, but more like a construction worker than a murderer.This is what she was paid to do. Serve glasses of water to customers that walk in and take their food to them when it was ready. Two years out of high school, and she...

20 likes 22 comments 22
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Amber Code Hell

Submitted to Contest #159

Last week after getting off a flight in Hong Kong and being sent into a 3-day hotel quarantine, I was naked, alone and afraid. Admittedly, only naked when I needed a shower, but alone and afraid much of the other time. After disembarking the plane, I notice the authorities have worked out all the detours I might make before showing up at the hotel. Shops. Bars. Walks in the park. I'm channelled out of the airport and straight into a taxi with locked doors. In the early days of quarantine, more than a few tourists had stopped for ‘a...

28 likes 19 comments 19
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Gluten Is What Makes This Nation Stick Together

Shortlisted for Contest #159 ⭐️

In Hoboken New Jersey, Felix lied to his wife Luna that he was going out only to pick up the sandwiches. Luna was very patriotic about wanting to eat sandwiches for lunch. He knew her preferences well. In the three or four years since they had been married, he couldn’t remember a time when they had ever argued about anything. Next year they even planned to make a baby.Outside, instead of going directly to the sandwich shop, Felix walked around the corner and away from Luna’s spying eyes, went into a bank branch. He took out his New York bank...

45 likes 55 comments 55
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Your Cat™️ Customer Service

Winner of Contest #158 🏆

Hi, I'm Timmy McHill and drugs and AA started me on the road to where I am today in the world of feline telephone fraud. I’m not sure which one, maybe both. My career in Customer Service began right after I took a quick detour from university at age 19. My educational readjustment happened because the University Police didn't understand the economic theory of harm reduction. Since the nursing students I was attending class with had an inflexible demand for party drugs, they would be dealing with real drug dealers downtown, which was har...

176 likes 148 comments 148
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Blind Date Done Deal

Submitted to Contest #157

“I’m trying to figure out who should be jealous of whom here?” Regina’s date asked, his handsome features glowing. She thought about how she would answer this question as the cameras of Australia's largest reality television show zoomed in.**Pre-Date Interview:“What do you hope for in life?” the director asked.“To be happy,” she said, smiling and looking straight ahead and not moving around in her chair as they had taught her. Her mother had told her to always look her best, “We need to have men look at you the way your dad looks at Aus...

26 likes 17 comments 17
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2072 / The Third Gender

Submitted to Contest #156

“What is it you are missing that gets you feeling restless, for what do you yearn?” The cheerful voice on the television moved to the next public service announcement. “In 2072, every child needs a Father, a Mother and a Jander. Or a Mother, a Mother and a Jander, or…”   Watching TV in her faction's break room, Ava found herself annoyed to be told that 3 people had to find each other in order to start a family. She hadn’t even managed to find one yet. Desperately, she wanted to change the channel but there weren’t many other c...

23 likes 22 comments 22
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Something Comes to the Surface at The Sheboygan Freediving Competition

Submitted to Contest #155

Every kind of animal, including humans, is enclosed within its own unique sensory bubble, perceiving but a tiny sliver of our immense world.-Ed Yong Marcia looked at the distant gray waters of Lake Michigan and hoped her husband Bob would enjoy himself that day. Bob was ranked 37th in the nation in Freediving - CWT division. Well, that meant about 10 people in America knew who he was, but she understood how important this was to him.“You look a bit off today,” Marcia said, seeing Bob slumped in his chair.“I’m fine. Why did you say that?” Bob...

19 likes 16 comments 16
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The Value Of Time / El Valor Del Tiempo

Submitted to Contest #154

Later on it was the whole family shouting, “We’re running out of time!” but at the beginning it was simply Uncle Julian not coming home one night. The next morning at 10am, the phone rang. “We have your Uncle. If you want him alive, don’t contact the police. We will call again in a few days.” And then just like in the TV shows they hung up. The caller had an accent from the Amazon provinces south of the capital, where the FARC has their strongholds.Many sleepless nights later, the phone rang again.“Your Uncle misses his wife, and Martic...

28 likes 28 comments 28
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Emperor, Do You Back The Coup?

Submitted to Contest #153

Isao’s youthful legs burned from kneeling since dawn. It wasn't acceptable to shift positions in front of the Emperor. In three years at the palace, the divine one had never spoken to him, yet had never complained about him either.The sovereign had been woken early to receive General Honjo and Minister Yuasa, who arrived with news of a coup. Soldiers filled with nationalistic fervor had mutinied and overrun the capital.The barrel chested General Honjo stood ramrod straight in a uniform covered with medals. He bellowed, “The Righteous Battali...

22 likes 19 comments 19
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I Have Few Words For This

Submitted to Contest #152

“I can see it now,” Regina said right after she pulled up her bangs and looked at her forehead in the mirror. Jake, her boyfriend, had pointed out a pimple. She was irritated to be receiving negative advice again, she found it controlling. In the last few months, Jake had also been constantly complaining about her inability to open up about herself.**After dinner, he sent her a link for a Recovering from Setback seminar. Jake looked at her from over his laptop.“Do you see the seminar link yet?” Jake asked.“I can see it now”, she sa...

23 likes 14 comments 14
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The Miracle At Bondi Junction

Submitted to Contest #152

We had been kicked out of our Airbnb. A tiny guest house behind a real house about a half mile from Bondi Beach. After Australia’s lockdowns were lifted, rentals were tight in the city. Another more desirable tenant had replaced us.Lately I had also begun to wonder if, instead of being here on the other side of the world, we should be in Brooklyn visiting my daughter in university, but the immediate concern at that moment was the day’s move to our new place of shelter.Two large suitcases stood next to us as we waited on the main street of Bo...

15 likes 8 comments 8
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