It was surprisingly warm for a January day in Pittsburgh when Jenny decided to take her dog, Mouse, for its morning walk. She slipped on Mouse’s collar but decided that it was warm enough outside to leave the dog booties by the door. That morning, she decided to slip on her own pair of dirty and worn-down sneakers instead of her own heavy snow boots.
She was excited that the sun pushed through the thick layer of clouds and melted the tiresome snow. She loathed the winter and could not wait for the day that she went to college in a state that was warm all winter long.
Jenny closed the front door behind Mouse and double checked that the door was locked. Recently, Jenny’s neighbor was robbed because she did not lock her front door when she took her own dog for a walk. She wanted to make sure that she was not the cause of a robbery at her parent’s house.
Mouse tugged on his leash, desperate for some slack so that he could smell the nearest walkway bush. Earlier that day, another dog walker stopped to tie his shoe, allowing his dog to do its business on the plants that lined the walkway to Jenny’s house.
When Mouse was finished sniffing, the two began to walk down the sidewalk along their usual dog walk path. When they were nearing the edge of the sidewalk onto the part of the neighborhood in which they had to walk in the street, a black car started. The car had been parked in front of Jenny’s friend Sarah’s house. When Jenny had turned from locking the house, she saw the car, but just assumed that Sarah had a guest over.
But now, the car was slowly beginning to drive in the direction of Jenny and Mouse, all the while Jenny paid no mind to it. By the time the car settled into a slow pace, Jenny was already wearing her headphones and blasting her current favorite songs. The world outside was completely tuned out to her, causing her to feel like her and Mouse were in a world of their own.
With a complete absence of outside noise filling her ears, Jenny decided it would be fun to close her eyes while she walked. She desired to feel the warm sun on her skin before it would disappear again for what could be months at a time. They had walked this path every day, so Jenny knew that Mouse would guide them where they needed to go while her eyes are closed. She had no idea that closing her eyes would put her in great danger.
The driver of the car soon noticed that Jenny’s grip on the leash was beginning to weaken, and that the dog was walking further away from its owner. He realized that the girl had loosened her grip unconsciously, and that if it continued to happen, the dog would soon be running free.
And that is exactly what happened. In one swift motion, Mouse tugged hard enough on the leash to send it flying out of Jenny’s hand. She unknowingly had only held the leash with the lightest of grips, allowing Mouse’s pursuit of a squirrel to cause her to lose the dog.
Mouse was in hot pursuit of the squirrel and was already running through the dense and rockiest part of the trees that lined the street Jenny stood on before she finally opened her eyes.
She began to make the long chase after her beloved pet when she realized that the woods surrounding her were not at all familiar. She did not even know that there were woods near her house. She turned around in a panic a few times looking for any kind of road sign or marker. But there were none along the stretch of road that led to a neighbor’s hunting cabin that she now stood on.
My dearest reader, I am sure you are wondering what happened to our darling Jenny. You see, when Jenny closed her eyes, Mouse quickly picked up a smell that he liked, causing him to follow it. He led himself and Jenny up the driveway of a house not too far from their own. He then led them onto a dirt path that was so tightly compacted by years of use that Jenny felt only pavement under her shoes.
The silly dog did not drag them far on the path before he spotted a new paved road between the trees. Mouse dragged Jenny over to it and decided to walk along this new road. He was a curious dog after all. Without realizing what was happening, the dog led Jenny just out of sight of the small path they had just taken before running off after the squirrel.
Because Jenny’s eyes were closed the whole time, she did not realize that about fifty yards from where she originally stood sat her neighborhood, just out of her line of sight.
She turned in frantic circles, hoping her dog would come running back to her. Instead, she confused herself over which direction they had come from. She took her phone out of her pocket and noticed that two hours had gone by. Jenny was not very good at calculating distance over time, so as far as she knew, she had walked dozens of miles.
Jenny began to panic and call out for Mouse, who by then had gotten bored of the squirrel and was exploring other parts of the unfamiliar woods.
--
At some point in her panic, Jenny had decided to leave the paved road to search for Mouse. She had no idea what kinds of animals were lurking around ready to harm her companion.
She had unknowingly been wandering away from her neighborhood and deep into the woods for almost another two hours before she stumbled upon Mouse. He had gotten tired during his adventure and decided to rest along some cold, damp rocks. Jenny sat down on the rock next to him, hoping that her body heat would keep them both alive.
You see, during the third and fourth hours of being in the woods, the sun had disappeared behind an endless field of white clouds. A cold breeze had shortly thereafter begun, and Jenny wished the two of them had worn their winter boots.
The tired feeling that accompanied wandering aimlessly in the wood for long periods of time overtook the girl and her furry friend, and the two drifted to sleep.
--
In a few hours, Jenny and Mouse would wake up to find themselves in the dark forest. They will continue to walk day after day, month after month, year after year hoping to find their way back home. But what the two did not know, was that they were already dead.
Hours earlier, the man in the black car noticed that Jenny would soon lose her grip on the dog’s leash. He followed them far away on foot when he could no longer follow by car. He pursued on foot until just before Jenny lost her grip. The dog took off after the squirrel at the precise moment that the man snuck up behind Jenny.
And while the man was busy covering Jenny’s lifeless body with leaves and twigs along the side of the empty road, Mouse grew tired of the squirrel. He soon found himself wandering into a rocky cavern filled with animals that did not like to be disturbed.
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7 comments
This story was written in such a lovely manner that I didn't want it to end. It was amazing. The last line was my favourite. I think you've done a great job portraying emotions. You obviously put in a lot of work. Great job!
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Hey, Madeline would you be kind to watch the first video it's on Harry potter. https://youtu.be/KxfnREWgN14 Sorry for asking your time, This my first time to edit video
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The story was extremely well written... Sophistication and elegance are key and you have nailed it
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I liked this. A story with a twist every bit as cold as a murderer's blade. I also liked the way the linear passage of time and space gets messed up as any trauma tends to do with memory. If I had a single gripe it would be with the occasional repetition/over-use of a word (the work "walk" appears three or four times in one sentence). That's really just a style thing and doesn't detract from what is a great story. Cheers Madeline - can't wait for the next one!
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Wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Amazing ending. The emotions were conveyed beautifully. When I read the Jenny was walking her dog, mouse. I thought she was walking a mouse, too. Then I found out it was the name of the dog. Well written. Great job, Madeline. Would you mind reading my new story "Secrets don't remain buried?"
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Ooh wow, I really enjoyed reading this story, and that twist at the end was amazing. I loved the way this story was written. Amazing work! Keep writing. :)
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The ending was amazing. Wonderful story. Can’t wait for your next.... Would you mind reading my new story “The dragon warrior?”
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