Lemons and Lemonade

“Maybe booking a wedding on a cruise ship wasn’t all that smart,” said Tilly Roland, shaking her head as she and her fiancé jogged around the stern on the promenade deck. Wind whipped her hair back into her face as they trotted along the starboard side of The Norwegian Joy. “A wedding is supposed to be the happiest day of our lives, but what if it isn’t?”

“Now, Fufu,” said Niles Aldrich, stopping short in order to place his arm around Tilly’s shoulders and draw her to his chest. “You are taking this worry-wart thing of yours to an extreme. It’ll be great. You’ll see.”

“Remember what happened at Emma and Brad’s wedding?”

“Ah, yes. Madge, and the way she hauled off and planted one on Brad in front of everyone. Well, your mother is nothing like Madge.”

“Mom won’t make a spectacle,” said Tilly. “That’s not what I’m worried about.” She turned to examine lifeboat number three on the promenade deck and scowled. “I just mean you never know what to expect when others are handling your plans. Whatever bad can happen, will happen. That’s what Dad always says.”

“Hey, there,” said Niles as he nodded to a Japanese couple posing for a selfie at the guard rail. He paused till they ambled away. “You and your Murphy’s law, sweets. Relax. Trust your wedding planner.”

“You mean coordinator. And we’ve got four of them, One for every twenty-five guests. Maybe too many cooks in the kitchen, if you know what I mean.”

“The cruise line has done thousands of weddings.”

“I want our wedding to be the best. I don’t feel right. I’m…”

“Not in control?”

“Exactly. Not in control. What if the captain is needed on the bridge and can’t perform the service? What if the guests are in their cabins, seasick? I should have chosen the gardenias instead of that tropical bunch. I should have--"

“--Sweets, don’t waste your energy worrying. The crew has got this. That’s why you can and should chill out. Now, come on. A little time in the Jacuzzi will make you feel brand new.” Niles peeked around the front of the lifeboat and peered out to sea. “The sun’s high, and the pool’s gonna be heaven.”

“You win, babe. What deck is the pool on again?

“Deck fifteen. We’ll go to the cabin first and change.”

Tilly lifted the edge of her blouse. “Got my suit on already.”

“Fufu! How’d you know I’d ask you to the Jacuzzi this morning?”

“I didn’t. It’s a precaution. In case I fall overboard!”

* * *

Niles and Tilly lounged in the Jacuzzi, lively bubbles swirling around their legs and the Caribbean sun beaming down. Niles squeezed his eyes closed and dozed off despite a steel band blasting out carnival-like tunes nearby.

 “Babe?”

 “Hmmm?”

 “You sleeping?”

“Not anymore.”

 “I think we should have gotten the all-white cake. People are gonna think we’re weird picking a white and green frosting.”

 “So, change it.”

 “Can’t. All plans had to be turned in thirty days in advance.”

 “Your dress has got green trim, right?”

 “Oh, disaster! Yes! What was I thinking?”

 “You like green. Your car is green, the shutters on your house are green, green it is. Now let me get some shut-eye before lunch.”

 “Lunch! What if a guest is allergic to seafood? We ordered scallops, salmon, and shrimp for the reception. Not a bit of beef.”

 “Seriously, Tilly? There are only twenty-eight different restaurants onboard. That one person isn’t going to starve.”

 “With 125 friends attending, I don’t think two waiters will work. We should have asked for three. The brochure suggested ‘One waiter and one bar server per twenty-five guests.’ We shouldn’t have been so stingy when Dad is paying for it.”

 “Two waiters can handle us. They do it every meal.”

 “Oh, Niles. I know you think I’m picky but I want everything to be memorable.”

“Memorable it will be,” said Niles. He kissed her on the cheek. “How about you go shower before lunch and I’ll be up in a while.” They had the wedding suite in The Haven on the 21^st deck.

 “Okay, but don’t sleep through lunch like yesterday.”

 “Now that wasn’t all my fault, was it, Fufu?” he said with a wink.

 “It does take two to tango,” said Tilly. She stepped out of the water, rapped him with a flick of her towel, and headed for the elevators. 

* * *

After a scrumptious lunch of barbecued brisket in the Q Texas Smokehouse on deck six forward, Tilly and Niles headed to the atrium, where a game of Newlyweds was being played in their honor.

Tilly leaned over to Niles, her eyes on Jamie, the cruise director, who stood at a microphone placed in front of a circle of chairs. Tilly asked, “You think three hours of photography will do it?”

“Yes, sweets. Three hours is more than sufficient.”

Jamie raised the mic and said, “Folks! We’re celebrating a wedding in two days. Let’s give our lucky couple, Tilly and Niles, a hand.”

A crowd of friends applauded.

“We’re about to see how well they know one another. Tilly, let’s see if you can match your fiancé’s answers. We asked Niles: What’s Tilly’s favorite fragrance? What did he say?”

“Roses?”

Jamie showed a mini whiteboard with Niles’ answer to the audience. “Roses it is. One down, two to go. Now, Tilly, what did Niles say is your favorite food?”

Tilly glanced at the faces in the atrium. A hundred or so of her friends were there cheering her on. “Salad?” she ventured.

Jamie turned a second whiteboard. “And Niles said, ‘salad!’ You guys are sure in tune! The final question: What did Niles say is your one big flaw?”  

“Oh, I don’t have any flaws,” Tilly remarked with a giggle, “but he probably said I drive like a crazy person.”

“Let’s reveal your beau’s answer for $500 worth of free drinks. And his answer was: ‘She’s a worry-wart.’”

“Ooooh, babe, how could you!” Tilly’s chair toppled over behind her as she fled the atrium.

* * *

The next morning The Joy dropped anchor in the turquoise waters off the balmy island of Grand Turk. The captain announced that boarding of the tenders on deck four would begin at 8:00 since the two piers reserved for cruise ships were already taken. He reminded everyone to carry their key cards and to be back on board by 2:30 p.m. The ship would sail for Puerto Plata at 3:00 sharp.

The couple grabbed their beach bags and plodded down the stairs, planning to be in one of the early groups to board the tender, which would drop them ashore. They had a full day of activities ahead including swimming, snorkeling, and a tour of Cockburn Town, topping it all off with a visit to a lighthouse. After docking at the Cruise Center, they met up with the tour guides for the shore excursion they had booked and took a seat in the back of an air-conditioned bus.

Tilly gripped her fiancé’s arm. “I don’t know why I thought of this, babe, but did you memorize your vows?”

“Weeks ago,” Niles said. 

After a short, half a mile ride, the bus let them off at Boaby Rock Point Beach, where they had time and gear for snorkeling. Niles took lots of shots of his bride-to-be in her skimpy bathing suit. “Smile, beautiful!”

“Are you sure about the three hours of photography? And what about the cake? Maybe we should have ordered plain orange flavor instead of chocolate? Chocolate is so not wedding, is it?”

“Tilly, chocolate is my favorite, and what am I going to do with you! Yes, yes. Three hours of photographers posing us is definitely enough. And if it isn’t, we’ll pass our phones around. Stop worrying, can you?” he barked. “For just one afternoon?”

His fiancée hung her head and sighed.

“How about we ditch the bus, sweets? We’ll see a lot more going in and out of these little brick-lined streets. This island is amazing, don’t you think? Finally, we can relax.”

Niles rented two scooters and off they roared to explore. In the old part of Cockburn Town, Tilly fell in love with the shops and bought half a dozen mugs. In the National Museum on Front Street, there were tempting baskets, hats, model sailboats, trinkets, and books.

Tilly was sorting through postcards stacked on twirl-around stands when the Japanese couple they’d seen yesterday on the promenade deck hurried up to them. All four smiled at each other, and the Japanese man frantically pointed to his watch.

“No problem,” said Niles, glancing at his own. “It’s early.”

The foreign couple disappeared, boarding a Norwegian Cruise Line bus parked outside the museum while Tilly hung dangly seashell earrings in front of her ears and admired herself in a three-way mirror. Niles stared out the door of the shop as the bus drove away in the direction of the pier. Soon they’d all be back on board. Back to the planning and worrying. Was that what he actually wanted?

 He glanced at his Rolex, making a minor adjustment to it while Tilly’s attention was focused on ceramic turtles.     

 Suddenly, she asked, “What time is it, babe?”

 “One o’clock. Just, barely 1:00,” he stammered, hoping she hadn’t caught on. “Still got one and a half hours till boarding time,” he added cheerily.

 “Super. I’m almost done.”

 They returned the scooters next, placing them carefully into the rack.

 “Wanna sample a local drink at one of the Cruise Center bars? Got plenty of time.”

 “Sure, but it’s still a ways. Can you help?” Tilly was loaded down with bags of souvenirs, which made Niles sigh, but at least she was thinking of gifts for others and not of the damn wedding or obsessing over everything that could go wrong.

They strolled in the blazing sun, taking turns donning the flowered sunhat Tilly had purchased, laughing, spying on other tourists, making up games about who the people were and where they were from.

“Here we are!” They turned a corner and reached the Cruise Center building. Gazing across the ocean, they stood there in awe. In the distance, a tiny speck that was The Joy was retreating farther and farther away.

 “The ship! We missed it! Oh my God! Wait! Wait up!” Tilly waved her arms back and forth. “What time do you have?”

 Niles frowned. “It’s barely 2:00, Fufu.”

 “You sure? It can’t be. How could The Joy leave without us! Our wedding is tomorrow. Call them. Call the captain and tell him to come back.”

 The Joy grew smaller and smaller. By then it was too late. Tilly plunked herself down on the pier and wept.

Niles peeked at his wristwatch and said dramatically, “Oh geez, I’m so sorry, Fufu. I forgot to change the time in Miami! It’s an hour earlier there. I forgot, sweets. I can’t believe this!” He turned his back to her for a second to hide the smile creeping up his face.

“You forgot? You? You forgot? What do we do now? What? What good is all the wealth in the world if you can’t turn a cruise ship around?”

Niles pulled his phone out of pocket. “It is 3 p.m. I was going by my watch, not the phone. What an idiot I am! How can I make it up to you, sweets?” 

“My flowers, the cake, the orchestra. My gown! Babe, my gown!”

Niles busied himself swiping the screen of his phone and tapping in a search. “Good news, sweets.”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“It’s good. I tell you, good. A marriage in Turks and Caicos is recognized in the U.S. We can get hitched here and everything will be fine. We’ll just have to buy a plane ticket and catch up with the ship on route.” He pulled her into his arms and kissed her. “Or maybe?” he said hopefully. “We just stay here for a while and enjoy us. Just us.”

“We’re not going to the Dominican Republic, not to St. Thomas, not to Puerto Rico, The Bahamas?”

“Fufu, listen to me. All this big wedding, the fancy plans, tons of guests … I don’t even recognize you. Your mind is somewhere else. Come on. Let’s get a drink and talk about this. What if getting stranded is the best thing that could have happened? You know what they say: ‘If life deals you lemons, you make lemonade?’”

Tilly wiped her eyes with the palm of her hand. “You do, Niles. That’s what you do. Make lemonade.”

“I’ll teach you, Fufu. It’s not all that hard.” He took her hand and led her to the Grand Turk Margaritaville bar.

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