A Young Chemist in a Unstable Colloidal Suspension of Crystalline Hydrogen Oxide in a Solution of Gaseous Dinitrogen and Dioxygen

Condensed hydrogen oxide crystals collided with my face. Since I was not at rest with respect to the fluid that carried the crystals, many impacted my exposed skin at more than the particles’ terminal speed. I could feel my entropy dispersing into the crystals and breaking up their lattices. The crystals however, were not the real threat; the true danger came from the invisible and entropy hungry gas that used these crystals as a visual indication of its presence. As compared to the crystals, far more of my internal energy went into satiating this stream of dinitrogen, for that was the bulk of this monster. At this rate I would soon approach thermal equilibrium with the monster.

It occurred to me that only one head of this monster was dinitrogen; the other was dioxygen. While both were hungry for my entropy, the latter head might just be willing to assist me in making enough entropy to share, if only I could find the proper tribute. But not here. The turbulent two-headed monster of dinitrogen and dioxygen was too angry here.

Eventually I stumbled onto a place where Coniferophyta scattered the angriest of the the monster’s particles, leaving a slightly gentler monster. Here I was elated to see a small ring of gabbro, an altar inside a temple to calm the monster. All I needed now was a sacrifice, an offering to barter for a small amount of entropy to maintain homeostasis.

Looking around, I found several dehydrated cellulose rods. As my stomach submitted a complaint to my brain, I briefly lamented that I lacked the proper enzymes required to metabolize these rods of sugar: candy made unaccessible by the linking of the sugar molecules. Maybe I could not extract calories directly, but if I could find a way of accelerating oxygen into the polysaccarides with sufficient energy, I could still release the calories into entropy’s hands, and hopefully mine as well.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out a small rectangular prism and a polysaccheride sheet. The latter I crumpled up and set with the cellulose rod I collected. As for the former, just like in the movies, inside the rectangular prism was but a single cellulose stick, a few centimeters long and tipped with a blend of potassium chlorate and phosphorous sesquisulfide. Adhered to the the side of the prism there were many small pieces of amorphous silica. I pressed the potassium chlorate and phosphorous sesquisulfide stick against the silica coated surface and dragged it along. As soon as a large enough fraction of the molecules on the surface had more thermal energy than the activation barrier, a chain reaction started, where the energy of chemical bonds breaking gave enough of an impulse to the atoms to break other bonds. Before the reaction ran out, I carefully lowered it to the the crumpled sheet of polysaccherides, allowing the chain reaction to spread to the sheet, which increased the overall scale of the reaction. Eventually the reaction was generating enough heat to propagate to the smallest of the cellulose rods which helped it jump to larger and larger sugar rods.

The second law assured me that entropy was being produced, but since I was not a closed system, it made no statements about my access to said entropy. Almost as quickly as the oxidizing polysaccharide generated entropy, the surrounding dinitrogen spirited it away. Driven by an energy gradient in the fluid, the entropy dissipated fast. The monster was greedier than I had hoped. It fact, it was nearly quenching the redox reaction in its desire to consume as much entropy as possible. If only it could be patient, more entropy would be created. I briefly pondered as to how much of a temperate difference was likely behind the fluid’s motion, but I stopped, reminding myself that I could not travel far enough to reach the high energy region with my current set of assets and liabilities. All I could do was huddle close to the efflux of radiation, trying to cover as much of a solid angle as could.

To my fortune the monster decided not to quench the chemical reaction but it was not long before it became obvious that the cellulose was the limiting reagent. In a way this was also fortunate, as I would be dead even faster if the dioxygen were limiting, but still, if I did not act fast my source of entropy would expire, and myself with it. Frantically I looked around, but all the material capable of reducing dioxygen had too much hydrogen oxide in them. The hydrogen oxide would absorb too much heat, and then create more entropy by escaping into the surrounding fluid joining with the two-headed monster without contributing to the chain reaction that I needed to get entropy from. Leaving the reaction felt like abandoning a child, but I had too if I wanted to feed it.

I heard it before I felt it, the monster cried out as the net force on it increased, accelerating it, slamming it into my back. I stumbled to the crystal covered ground, my cellulose rods scattering before me. I watched helplessly as the monster hurled into my redox reaction. Around the sugar rods, the high kinetic energy gas molecules, caught up in the excitement, enthusiastically joined in with the monster leaving the cellulose unattended as low kinetic energy gas molecules looted the entropy form the polysaccharides, leaving too many links in the reaction chain broken and dead.

Crawling over to what was my only source of new entropy, buried in hydrogen oxide crystals, I dug up the ashen corpse. Pulling the glove off my primary hand, I carefully felt for heat amongst the ashes and unreacted cellulose, but now what once gave me entropy now greedily pulled energy from my finger tips. In despair, I returned my glove to my hand. I do not know how long I sat there, meditating on my fate. My body was still breaking down lipids, cycling ATP and creating entropy. But eventually entropy would be eaten by the monster faster than my body could generate it, and once the entropy gradient dropped below some critical threshold, I would be too close to thermal equilibrium to be considered alive anymore, and the monster would win.

A voice startled me out of my state of internal contemplation.

“Mischa!”

It was my name.

“Play time is over! Come inside. Hot cocoa is ready. Then you need to finish your chemistry homework.”

“Okay Mom!” I responded.

Happily, I stood up and ran inside.