For once in eternity, God didn't know what to do, although he was omniscient.
And knew it. Or he thought so. Now he wasn't so sure.
If he knew all things in heaven and hell, which was a hell of a lot more than heaven alone, he would instantly know in advance how to respond in the future.
But he didn't. Nothing made sense anymore!
The chances of human beings finding a way to outsmart God were lower than a snowball's chance in hell, or heaven and hell combined, whichever was worse. How could they set him up behind his back, in front of his face?
Only God could achieve the impossible, so this must be his will, since it was clearly impossible! He was stunned. This made no sense, and he knew it.
Or thought he did. Aarrgghh!
God grumbled, then sat alone in silence.
Never mind, he assured himself. It's some trick of the Devil that he must have allowed. Then made himself forget, since he was omnipotent.
Only God could make himself forget that he forgot something, right?
Just forget it, he thought.
God tore through his infinite collection of files, searching frantically. For random thoughts or ideas scribbled in the margins, or any clues at all to why he might have planned to forget whatever plans he forgot. There must be some note reminding him, somewhere. But since he could not remember where he forgot he wrote it down, surely he had planned all that!
How else could God, himself, set up humans to set him up? Unless he set that up, too? This whole thing smelled of a setup, right under his nose.
Finding no answers, he found himself lost. For the first time in history, with no beginning or end, God was clueless. If his plan was to prove his omniscience, now he knew how cluelessness felt.
Otherwise, he wouldn't have a clue!
God now knew what it meant not to know.
At least he knew that much.
God stared at the letter, from the Nobel Committee on their official letterhead. By unanimous decision, God had been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. After how many centuries of nations at war? At the suggestion by a young Swedish girl, he was nominated by students across the globe in a viral campaign. That quickly became a joke on the Internet.
Nevertheless, Greta persisted. She believed that by asking all nations and leaders to endorse the same nomination, voting for God would bring peace to a deeply troubled world. If not for the laughter and ridicule of skeptics, certain she had ulterior motives. Her newest video conference address, urging global unity, had to be tied to winning the debate over climate change!
God was speechless. Was this a trick, a ruse by ruthless humans, entrapping him by forcing him to appear onstage? To face a barrage of questions about Jesus? Or global warming?
No, given the history of these insufferable creatures he created, while drunk with delight from overestimating the human ego, God knew the calculating minds of his own children, that constantly plotted to catch him in the slightest contradiction. Condemning falsehood and demanding truth, while secretly afraid to find out! Thus, the human conscience was designed to tear apart the first flaw, as an excuse to condemn and discredit all else that followed.
God knew the game, but didn't know what to do.
Perhaps these curious humans just wanted to know: What would God say? Would he thank his mother? Everyone else thanks “God” in their acceptance speeches. Who is left for God to thank, but himself?
Alas, there were no notes, no clues as to what God had planned for this moment.
He was truly at a loss for words. Yet longed to give his children what they yearned for in their hearts. He realized that was his answer.
The stage was set, the podium lit up to receive the Word of God. Every camera and every television broadcast, all eyes focused on the microphone, under a single, golden spotlight.
The glow of God’s presence filled the auditorium. The audience gasped. Then waited, in breathless awe. The divine light grew, overtaking the stage. And pierced the heart and mind of every viewer around the world at once.
God spoke not a word. He didn’t need to. He merely was, is, and always would be. Exuding pure love, pure knowledge of all truth over time and space, that every soul recognized in an instant.
Every heart received, and every ear heard in a different tongue, a unique message to each person.
Some heard God tell them gently: “I love you, my child. Fear not. I love you, as I want you to love others.”
Other cups filled up with reassurance: “All the things you’ve heard and rejected. None of it matters anyway. Be at peace. Know I am with you.”
Anyone with a favorite Scripture, swore they heard God say it. Those who had been told God loves them, just the way they are, for they were made that way for a purpose, suddenly knew this was true. Beyond all doubts or fears, completely healed and melted away.
Nobody said a word. Some wept, many prayed, overwhelmed with joy. Or grief and regret, followed by gladness and relief.
Everyone knew they were loved. And were created with love. Greater than the unspeakable suffering in the world, the collective injustice and genocidal wars that scarred human history.
Nothing was unforgivable. Everything was understood. Not a word was needed. Love was sufficient unto love. And peace was its own path.
The Christians were right. The Buddhists and Muslims. Even atheists and the worst skeptics found themselves justified and redeemed. God’s universal truth, by definition, encompassed all knowledge, completed every path, and answered all questions to bring the spiritual process of each individual soul to fruition. In perfect union and harmony, as God intended from the start.
He didn’t remember planning it this way. But he went along with the flow, trusting that if everything lay in his own hands, then he must have willed this event, exactly as it unfolded.
His will was perfect, right? Maybe. Maybe not.
But his love for his children, timeless and true, spoke for itself.
Without doubt. Without question.