A Blank Slate

"Joanna, can you hear me?"

Who's that? My head pounds as I try to sit up. Where am I? I look around me trying to figure out my surroundings though everything seems to be a blur. The last thing I remember was doing the dishes and asking Rachel if she had finished her homework.

"Joanna. Look at me. Are you hearing me?"

I look up to see a small pen looking flashlight being used to look in my eyes. Am I in a hospital? That's the way it seems.

"Where am I?" I ask the doctor- yes it was a doctor- who was checking my vitals and listening to my heart with his stethoscope.

"Good to have you back with us. You have been out for so long, there was a point where we thought that you would no longer be with us."

I stare blankly at him as I try to figure out what is he talking about. Just five minutes ago, I was in my kitchen, doing the dishes to make dinner and attending to my children.

"Can you remember your name?" He asked.

"Yes, it is Joana Mckinnon."

He turned to look at a lady who I didn't notice was in the room until now. She whimpered into the small handkerchief she held in her hand. As the fog in my mind began to clean, I recognized who she was. It was Clara, my sister. It was odd though because she was looking younger than she did yesterday.

"Can you remember your age, Joanna?"

"What's with all these questions? Five minutes ago I was home, with my children and about to make dinner. Now I'm strung up like a test subject in a hospital. I'm confused, and I want to go home."

They continue to eye each other which unnerved me. What is the secret they share which they care not to share with me?

"Clara!" I called out to my sister.

"Can you please tell me what is going on?"

She opened her mouth to speak, but the doctor quickly cut her off.

"Joana, I can understand your frustration, but if you can just assist us a little longer, I'm sure to explain everything." His face seemed pleasant as he spoke, but I don't know what to believe. For that moment I gave in. The sooner this is all done, the faster I'll be home to my family. Speaking of family. Why is it Clara here and not John? I love my dear sister, but shouldn't he be the one in the room and not her?

"Can you tell me your age?" The doctor asked.

"Sure, I'm twenty-five years old."

There is that look again. I'm about to blow a fuse.

"Can you remember where you live?"

"Of course I can remember my Goddam home. I live at 39, Orchid Boulevard, Miami, Florida." As I uttered my address, my sister started to cry harder.

"Can someone tell me what the hell is going on? Why is Clara crying and where are John and the kids?"

Clara screams and I'm sitting there wondering which circus did I join or where the hidden cameras were for this prank show. I look frantically around the room. Where would they be hidden? Maybe anytime soon they will be jumping out from somewhere and saying you've been pranked.

The doctor looks somberly at me and then he begins to speak.

"Joana, firstly let me introduce myself. My name is Dr. Johnson. I've been your doctor for the past five months." I open my mouth to speak but he continues cutting me off.

"You are not 25 years old. You are in fact 18. Your name is Joana Phillips and not Joana Mckinnon, and your address is actually 1022, Benton Ave, Orlando Florida. I know that this is a lot to take in, but you need to relax and soon we will figure this out together."

The expression on his face told me that he was worried about me, and I did not doubt that my face may have looked bewildered. I don't know who Joana Phillips was, but that's not me. What kind of crazy people were these? Why is my sister here crying and allowing them to trick me? It has got to be a prank or something. 

"Where are the cameras?" I asked with a small giggle escaping from my lips.

"Where are the cameras? The joke is up. I know that this is a prank. You can bring out the cameras and my family too."

The doctor looked at me as if I had gone mad.

"My name is Joana Mckinnon. It has been that way for the past five years. I'm married to John Mckinnon and we have two lovely children. A daughter who is four years old and a son who is two years old. I'm a phlebotomist who is attending nursing school in the evenings. What else do you need me to tell you?"

The doctor walked to the door and called someone, but I wasn't able to make out the name. Maybe he was telling the camera crew to come in. It's about time. I'm ready to get out of the awful hospital gown and get home to finish dinner. John was going to give me some answers as to why he pulled this stunt. If this was his idea of an early anniversary gift since our anniversary is two days away, then it sucks. The doctor returns but he has a nurse in tow. They've got to be kidding me. These people are crazy. They just don't know when to stop.

"Joana, are you able to remember anything before you woke up here?" He asked. I'm no longer interested in their game.

"Where are my husband and my two kids. I'm ready to go home. You've had your fun, and you've had your laugh. I've had enough. Can you tell John to come in? I'm ready to leave. You can also put in that this is a crappy anniversary gift."

"Please do bear with us a little more. Answering my questions will only help us to figure things out."

I rolled my eyes at him. This man was sure of an actor. He was giving it his all for a silly prank show. Hats off to you, Dr. Johnson. I hope they give you a raise, though I doubt they will.

" As I said before, I was in my kitchen using the dishwasher with the intent to start dinner. I was planning on making meatballs and spaghetti with a fresh salad. John would have been home in thirty minutes. The last thing I remember doing was asking Rachel, my daughter, if she had finished doing her homework, while Jonathan was playing with his building blocks in the corner of the kitchen."

"Interesting!" Muttered Dr. Johnson after which he whispered something to the nurse which she jotted down. He seemed nervous and avoided making eye contact with me.

No more. No more of the crap. My kids must be hungry, and I won't sit around here entertaining utter rubbish. I started to pull at the IV lines and tried to swing my lines off the bed. Then I heard Clara shouted.

"Stop it! Just stop it, Joana. Oh, my God. Wh...What is going on with you? Dr. Johnson what is going on with my sister. Please tell me why is she not remembering. Why...oh God...why?" She hiccuped through her tears which she continued to mumble indecipherably.

"Clara, calm down. What's with the theatrics. Yesterday when we spoke. you were fine. What's gotten into you today?"

"Joanna, we haven't spoken in five months, Oh my Gosh!"

"What are you talking about? You are just as committed to this nonsense too. Yesterday we had coffee and we were talking about Peter and if you want to move in with him or not."

"Which Peter are you talking about? The only Peter I know is my college buddy and we are just friends."

"Yea, right. Just friends with benefits. Well, not even that anymore since he wants you to move in with him. Can you just cut the crap and let us get out of here."

She shook her head and looked at me with pity. I felt something in the pit of my stomach. It unnerved me. It didn't feel good. Was this a prank or was this some weird altered reality?

She shook her head once more and said. "Joana, you've been in a coma for the past five months. Don't you remember anything at all? The accident. You went to a party and was driving home drunk. The car got out of control and you crashed into a light post. You had a nasty concussion and we never thought you would wake up. I held onto hope, and here you are awake but speaking of a family that doesn't exist."

"How dare you? I always knew you were jealous." I shouted at her. Her eyes widen and she seemed like a deer caught in oncoming headlights.

"I always knew that you were jealous of John and me. You thought you should have gotten married before me. I had the family before you did, and it is killing you inside. Isn't it?"

"What? Joanna... Doc, tell her. Tell her I'm not lying. Tell her that she has been out for months. That every day I sat by her bedside praying, asking God to bring her back to me...Tell her..." Her voice trailed off as she once again started to cry.

"Joana, I think you need some rest. This has been a lot for you to take in. When you wake again, I'm sure you'll feel better."

"Get out of my way. I'm leaving this place and going home to my family. The ones that I know love me."

I finally yank the IV out of my hand and jumped off the bed. The doctor and nurse rushed to my side trying to hold me back. My head pounded as if someone had just hit me with a bat. Maybe this is a dream. Maybe I fell, hit my head and now I'm having this weird dream and I'll soon wake up. I push against them while the nurse screamed for help and I saw an orderly dressed in blue scrubs run into the room. He grabbed me and with his superior strength, helped the doctor to place me back onto the bed. All this time, I was kicking and screaming, giving it my best fight. I just want to go home. I need to see my kids. Suddenly, I started to feel weak.

I looked to my right, and there was a needle in my arm. The nurse, during my battle, had stuck me with a drug and now, I slowly drifted off to sleep. As my eyes finally closed and the room grew dark, I wondered where was my husband, where was my kids, and why was this happening to me.