Kind Johnny

It all started the night of the Storm. 

Catherine was alone, the tv in front of her playing reruns of Space Explorers while her hands went up and down, carefully stitching the lace onto a near perfectly crafted dress for an old victorian doll somewhere in Kansas. It was the same thing she had done the night before that and the night before that and the night before that and every ‘night before that’, as far back as she could remember. It had been this way so long that the days and years started to blur together into a steady fuzz of bad sci-fi effects, unfinished doll clothes, and the constant emptiness of her apartment. 

It hadn’t always been that way.

His name was Jon, and Catherine still kept the photo of their wedding day hung on the wall by her chair so that she could look up and remember him. Things had been better when Jon was around. Catherine had always had a hard time connecting with others. They had the tendency to judge her so quickly, abandon her without really knowing her, but Jon had never been that way. No one had ever understood her the way that he had. So patient. So loving. He always made her feel wanted, even when she knew that she made things hard for him.

When he died he left her with no one. 

As long as Jon was around she didn't need anyone else, but with him gone it was like she was left adrift at sea with no life preserver to keep her afloat. She had no family. They had so few friends, and without Jon around, it had gotten so much harder to meet new people. Every interaction went exactly the same. They would smile politely, nod as she spoke, and then find an excuse to leave the conversation as soon as possible, and those were the nice ones. The ones who didn't call her names or mock her for the way she tried to speak to them. After a long while, she got tired of people misunderstanding her, rejecting her, and slowly distancing themselves until they felt comfortable completely ignoring her. So she stopped giving them the chance to. 

What did she need on the outside anyway? She had every season of Space Explorers on DVD and made enough selling her doll clothes to pay the rent. On the rare occasions that she did have to leave the apartment, her gaze stayed fixed on the floor. It was just easier that way. As long as she was alone, she wasn't being hurt. 

The storm raged outside her window that night. Lightning broke across the sky menacingly like a warning to the world below. Then, all at once, there was a loud crack, and the electric glow around her faded to black in the span of a single stitch of her needle. Thunder outside boomed in response and Catherine's apartment became an empty void. 

She dropped the dress in a rush to get to the light switch.  

She flipped it on and off. 

Nothing. 

Her palms started to sweat.

She tried it again. On and Off.

Still nothing. 

A pit started to form in her stomach as the realization of what happened began to sink in. 

She didn't panic, no it wasn't panicking but it wasn't pleasant either. Her chest felt tight and her small apartment foreign. Familiar objects morphed in the dark and set her on edge. She knew it was the same apartment but the surprise of it all had put her on edge all the same. Outside there came muffled voices and the sound of doors opening all down the hall as the other residents opened up to confer with one another. Catherine heard them but didn't register anything they did at first. Her hands began to fidget restlessly and slowly she was being pulled more and more into herself, but then there came a soft rapping on her door. 

The sound drew her attention slowly. That wasn't right, people didn't knock on her door. Why would someone be knocking on her door?

The knock came again.

The thoughts of the void in her apartment subsided and were replaced with curiosity. This time, very hesitantly, she moved to the door and opened it to find a brown-haired man calling down the hall to someone. 

When he heard the door he turned to her and smiled kindly. “Oh good, I just wanted to check that you were alright.” He said oh so kindly. 

Catherine didn't know how to respond, so she said nothing. No one had ever checked on her before. 

The man seemed a little confused by this and tripped over his words as he tried to continue. “I’m...sorry I didn't introduce myself. My name is Johnny. My family and I live two doors down…”

Something sparked in Catherine's heart. 

“Oh Johnny, that was my husband's name!” Catherine burst out. 

At the response, some of Johnny’s confusion began to subside. “Really?”

“Yes! He passed a few years ago…” Her eyes fell a little bit at the memory but then she remembered the Johnny at her door and her curiosity took over again. “Also, my name is Catherine.”

The man scanned Catherine with what may have been pity or maybe genuine concern but Catherine couldn't really tell which. She must have said something wrong again. There was a pause as he seemed to contemplate something. When he spoke again his eyes softened and the kind smile returned. “Well, it's nice to meet you, Catherine.” He pointed down the hall. “You know...a lot of the kids are scared and we were thinking of having a little get together in the lobby to make them feel a little safer, would you like to join us?”

Excitement bloomed in Catherine's chest. When was the last time someone had invited her to anything? A year ago? Two? 

“I’d love to!” 

Johnny nodded in affirmation and waited outside the door while Catherine locked up. They walked down to the lobby side by side. It was surreal. Catherine couldn't remember the last time that she had talked to anyone like that, but as they walked, they held a full conversation. It was like Catherine had been starving for this for so long and was just now noticing the hunger. 

When they reached the lobby, they found it adorned like a refugee camp for teddy bears. Parents sat on the floor with their children in scattered blanket and pillow nests they had built together, while others milled about between them. Everyone was there it seemed, and more than that, everyone was engaging with everyone else. On one side of the room, Catherine watched as a woman who was handling some kind of portable camping coffee-maker prepared hot chocolate for an eagerly waiting crowd of children that gathered around her. In a different area, there was a man who was trying to help a woman calm down her baby who had been woken by the ordeal. Everywhere she looked, there were people pulling together like Catherine had never seen before. 

Catherine and Johnny had barely entered the room when the woman from before came up to offer her her own cup of hot chocolate. Just to lighten the mood, the woman had said with a laugh. It had lightened the mood. To Catherine, that room was brighter than any she had seen in a long time. 

Johnny pointed to a red-haired woman sitting on a soft purple blanket with two young girls laying on her lap gazing up at the ceiling. “Those are my girls right over there.” He spoke with such pride but there was something else too. Finality. He took a step away from Catherine and her heart dropped. Time slowed and the room around Catherine suddenly seemed more intimidating. All at once, she was adrift on the sea again. “Well, I should really…”

He turned back to Catherine as he spoke and when he saw the look on her face, his words trailed off. It made him stop and rethink. Just as Catherine thought that she really would be left alone again, something in his face shifted. He squinted at her playfully. “Would you like to meet them?”

“Yes please!” The sea receded around her. She took a breath.

Somehow the worry that Catherine usually got meeting new people had simply disappeared. Johnny just seemed so nice, his family must have been nice too.

And they were. 

Layla, Johnny’s wife, welcomed her immediately and when she was introduced she offered Catherine a big hug. The touch was something she never realized she had been missing. When was the last time she had touched another person? And their children, Charlie and Kitty, made her laugh so hard with their juvenile humor. They were precious, and just like their mother and father, they were so nice to her. This little family allowed her onto their blanket and they spent the whole night together like that. 

Catherine didn't approach any of the other people, but even without speaking to them, they welcomed her. At some point in the night, a few of the more musical residents brought out guitars and started leading songs. The music soared and all of the single voices came together into one loud harmonious beast filling the air around them. No one rejected her that night, or said mean things about her, or stopped her from speaking, or any of the things she was used to. People smiled at Catherine and said things like crazy night huh? And I am not looking forward to tomorrow. She smiled at these comments and they smiled back at her like she was a person worthy of such a response. 

It was beautiful.

It was a dazzling star-filled night in a month of only pitch blackness.

Then just as quickly as it had started, it was over.

Even before the lights came back on, people started to break off. Parents whose children had gone to sleep, people who had to wake up early for work, those who were too tired to stand it anymore, but for a long time, the rest persisted. People would say I should really leave and then due to the gravity-like pull of the community, they would stay for another hour, but when the lights came back on, the pull was interrupted. 

Suddenly people began to pack up and leave in large droves. 

Even Johnny, Layla, Charlie, and Kitty. 

Even Catherine had to leave eventually. She tried to hang on for so long but in the end, she was left alone in the now brightly lit but painfully empty lobby. Left marveling at the miracle she seemed to have witnessed but also all too aware that it had come to an end.

That had been a month ago, but Catherine still thought about it. 

Afterward, she had tried to talk with the people from that night but once the storm had passed, so apparently had the courtesy. Most were not rude, but she could see them checking their watches whenever she started a conversation with them or pretending not to see her when they passed her in the hall. It was like it had never happened. 

Even Johnny, who was oh so kind, gave her little more than a wave and a friendly greeting when he saw her. 

A month after the storm Catherine was back in her room sewing a doll dress and watching Space Explorers, alone. Back in her routine. Back in her tomb.

Her eyes fell on a picture of Jon, her Jon, sweet, sweet, understanding, loving Jon and she had never missed him more in her life. Against her best efforts, her thoughts drifted to Johnny, kind Johnny, and welcoming Layla and adorable Charlie and Kitty. She had lost them too. How she didn't know. She must have done something but she didn't understand what. All she knew was that she missed them. Even if she had only known them for a night. The longing settled in her stomach because she wanted to speak to them and laugh like they all had that night. She wanted it to be like that again. She wanted everyone to come together and to be oh so open. She wanted to sing. She wanted to hear them call offhanded comments to her and she wanted to smile at them and see them smile back. It had to come back. There had to be a way to bring it back. 

She could bring it all back. 

She found the biggest iron skillet she had and headed for the basement. It had to come back, just one more chance and she would do it right this time. If the power was out, then everyone would come back and she could try again. This time she would be more friendly and then they wouldn't forget about her so easily. 

The fusebox was not hard to find, all she did was follow the wire connectors along the ceilings until they reached the box. It was going to be just like the last time. They would talk to her. They would show her love. She would be one of them again. A single tear formed in the corner of her eye. She held the pan firmly in both hands, shut her eyes tight, and swung.