The Christmas Dilemma

Christmas is just around the corner and gift-giving is upon us once more. The great gift-giving dilemma has always been one of my terrible faults. I usually do the best match in someone’s character to tell what type of gift to give someone. If they loved animals or if they were a nature lover, or they loved to travel, then buying them something wasn’t going to be so hard. It usually helps if you know that person too. I know from the experience that I can’t buy a gift for a stranger. Unless I had some kind of background information first. What they liked to do, what color they like, what they don’t like, what talents they have, what hobbies? Without anything at all, it’s difficult to shop around for them, some must agree?  

Well, this one year I was new to the dating game thing and I was invited to Christmas party at a boyfriend’s brother's place. What an experience that was, and not in a good way. I had to go out and buy some things for his parents and for the brother and his wife. The kids would receive gift cards, can’t make a mistake in giving money, right? What kid would turn down money at Christmas? I had asked the boyfriend at the time what his parents were into, and I asked what the brother was into and his wife. I didn’t get the answer I wanted to, I got “I am not sure, but whatever you give them I’m sure they’ll love it.” No, that’s not even close to the answer that I needed from him. I needed specific answers to what I need so that I don’t buy them something that they can’t relate to. It has to be something that they won’t wrap back up and give it to someone else for a gift, that is terrible to do, but I have done it myself.  

Now, I had to think of the things that I had seen in both of their homes, what conversations we all had at times, what they liked or interested in. It was hard to shop for these people, I was going to take the boyfriend with me, but since he was a truck driver, he wasn’t around most of the time, it was a surprise enough that he actually would be around for Christmas at all. It was usually the fact he was a truck who had to take a load somewhere in the states or it was the long haul to somewhere that would take a few days to get to. Christmas time was the double-time in pay, so it was important to him that he got the extra holiday travels. He liked to do things that cost a whole bunch of money; liked to ski, liked to take long holidays off in a warm place, liked to gamble, liked to golf in paradise somewhere fancy. He liked to live the high life, and do things that were not usually done on an everyday basis. Buying gifts for his family was just as crazy too, what do you buy for people that already have things and have nice things that I couldn’t afford?  

I had such a time when I went to do the shopping for them, it all started when my cheque from work was late. The printer ink that printed our cheques at work was blobbing out on everything it printed, meaning; everything came out in huge dotted letters and they smeared. The guy that would always come out to fix the printer wasn’t working that day, and on top of everything there was a terrible blizzard out, freezing cold weather, so the guy that did come out to us was late, took him extra time to get to us because of the weather. Then, it was the problem with the printer that took him a while to fix, from having to replace a part and not having it with him, which then he had to go grab apart, and that took time again. When he actually fixed it, there was the time to print to our cheques out, which took time, and the wait was after hours, I couldn’t wait around, but I had to for the fact that the next day was the holiday already and nobody was going to be at work for the next three days. I had to wait and so did 20 other people.  

Once the printer was done doing our cheques, it was late and I had only a couple of hours to get these gifts that I had no idea what to buy and to get home to make dinner, or to at least grab dinner and feed the kids. I had to pick up the kids from daycare first before I went shopping and what a treat that will be, hard to take kids shopping before Christmas Eve, usually I would pick them up and take them home where my older daughter would sit with them, but I had to take them with me to make it to the mall and do the shopping for the Christmas dinner the following day. It was crazy busy, the kids had seen Santa so they were good after that, but to buy gifts were going to be impossible  

What do you buy for people that are in a whole different class than yourself? I’m not a wealthy person and I know these people are not going to be happy with just a gift basket or something like an arrangement of flowers, so what was I going to buy? I had searched the mall up and down for a couple hours, I was already getting nervous, my time was running short, the mall was going to be closing soon and I still have no clue what to buy. I had to call the boyfriend for some kind of idea, and that was a huge mistake, he was completely no help, he actually got mad at me for phoning him while driving, due to the weather outside, he couldn’t chat with me, he had to concentrate on the highway, and he didn’t want anything to happen to his load, he had to be at the drop off in time, to make it back in time for the dinner party at his brothers. I was a complete wreck. My kids were getting restless, they wanted to leave and I was upset from all the excitement going on, what was I going to do?  

I couldn’t handle the stress any longer, I had to get out of the mall, I was just giving up when it hit me. I had the best gift that I could give the whole family and I had to wait till I got back home to make it. My boyfriend had this camcorder that he took everywhere with him to capture all the moments with his family. I wasn’t sure if my plan was going to work. but it should be the gift that they all talk about for a while at least. It’s something that should warm their hearts and keep memories going for everyone. The plan was going to take me a while to do, but I had till the next day to complete this big plan of mine and I wasn’t going to give up and be that outsider who didn’t bring anything and my boyfriend wouldn’t be very happy either, I didn’t want to make a fool out of myself, I had class, I have high expectations of myself, plus, I have a creative mindset to pull off this idea. I just hoped that I had the skills enough to make it the way I wanted it to in my mind.  

So, I gather up the kids at the mall, I tell them that we have to get going right at that moment, I have some big ideas that must be done now, and I can’t wait to do them, I didn’t have a lot of time. The kids were curious about what I had planned and they bugged me all the way home, but I didn’t say anything to them, I wanted it to be a big surprise. We got home and I got the kids to take out food, I got them to watch a movie and I made their snacks so that I had time to do what I needed to do quietly and without being interrupted. They bugged a bit, but I said that they had to give me a few hours and maybe if they could keep a secret, I would show them. They quickly scattered to the living room again and did their own thing, they watched their movies, they played video games, and eventually passed out from waiting so long. It took me a few hours after I got going, I had to find the right pieces that fit just right into what I was making. I wasn’t sure if it was going to work out, but after a few hours had gone by, I was convinced that this gift was going to be priceless and very unique. They’d all love it, and I wasn’t going to look like the Grinch after all.  

Finally, the gift was complete, the pieces were in order, the right choice in music I wasn’t too sure of but I had to go through a lot of my boyfriend's tunes to find the right fit. Everything was going well; it all was going well. What I had to do next was get this masterpiece in something nice. The usual wrapping paper wasn’t going to do, I had Christmas gift boxes, but nothing small enough to fit my masterpiece, what a shock that I didn’t have the right wrapping material for this unique gift, I had to laugh because that’s my luck, why would anything work out for me? I was so happy with what I had made, but to spoil everything in the end, I didn’t have the right gift wrap for this type of gift. I had worked all through the night up till 9am, I had another idea that I would print off some of the family’s pictures on colored paper and use that for wrapping paper. I had to grab some shiny copy paper though, so I had to step out before the kids woke up. I got ready to go and my daughter wakes up, she was half asleep still when I told her that I was stepping out for about an hour. She didn’t mind and told me to hurry back, she’d watch the kids when they woke up. I hurried myself to the store and bought some nice, shiny copy paper, then I had to go to Shopper’s Drug Mart to print off the pictures I needed for the wrapping paper I needed to wrap that unique gift. I was more excited about giving that gift than anything else. I didn’t even tell my boyfriend what I had made.  

I got my running around complete and I had to just get back home, wrap the gift and have the kids ready to go. The boyfriend made it back, he got ready and I was ready to go while everyone was getting ready. I took my shower when I got back home and wrapped the gift, the kids were all next, their clothes all clean and ironed, all smelling like a million bucks, it was going to be a lot of fun I thought, it was just killing me about the gift I had made for my boyfriend's family, I wanted them so badly to open it and take a look at what I put together at the last minute, but had to wait until dinner was done, and the dishes and kitchen were cleaned up. The anticipation was eating me up inside, I couldn’t wait, I wanted my gift to be first, but my boyfriend had to play guitar for the family and serenade them all. It was beautiful, he sang them “Coming Home for Christmas” which he blew their socks off, he did an amazing job. I had no idea he had that in him, I was surprised at the hidden talent he shared that night. His gift was perfect so I wanted to be next, I got up and handed the gift to my boyfriend's mom, and gave the card to my boyfriend's brother to open so that they all were able to share it.  

I was so nervous and I hoped that I pulled off the impossible, and from all the smiling and laughing that went on, I think I managed it. The brother got up and walked over to pull down the projector screen and put on the video for everyone to enjoy. It was all the family moments from their other Christmas’s together and playing in the background was random music from Pink, Seal, Elvis, Celine Dion, The Eagles, AC\DC, Lady Gaga, and just some other Christmas carols in the background. They all laughed, some had tears of joy, some commented on the perfect gift and then I received all the hugs and kisses that I never expected, but I was overwhelmed with them all. That one gift that I was so nervous about turned out to be the gift of a lifetime. That video was played during every other Christmas gathering. They played it as a new tradition after their Christmas Dinner, and I am not sure what they do now since I am no longer attending these gatherings. We aren’t together anymore, but I am sure that they do watch it, I would think they would carry out that new tradition even if I wasn’t around.  

I found that the actual gift isn’t just the actual expensive gift, it doesn’t have to be that piece of jewelry, or that expensive electronic device, or that fancy diamond ring. It comes from the heart that means more than the physical gift. It didn’t have to be the material things that make gift-giving a whole better kind of gift. Something that means the whole world to someone else means a lot more than money. I was always worried about making a good impression and making others happy and never worried about myself, it always had to be about someone else, while always leaving the most important person out. After breaking up with this boyfriend I realized all this and from that moment on, I also got to experience the best gift-giving and not worrying about what others will think. It made me happier to do things that were more personalized than to worry about how much money I had to spend. I got really resourceful with the creativeness I became for making gifts like this home video of memories, and I took it to a new level, I make them for others now and doing pretty good so far. I love to make others happy, but I also make myself happy doing things like this. Besides writing which is one of my other passions, I make home videos for those who have everything. Why not? Without me and my craftiness, people didn’t have everything after all.