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Horror Funny Adventure

For years, he has taunted me. For years, he has turned my home into a living nightmare. It seems like my entire life he has chased me, existing in the shadows and making an appearance when I least expect it. He has stolen sleep from me, he has stolen my food, he has stolen my safety, my comfort, my sanity. All that I have is worth nothing when he could appear at any given moment to take it all away. 

I know not his name. He is tall and unnaturally thin. He moves in a way that doesn’t seem right, back and forth and swaying from side to side. Truly every part of him is unnerving. From his crooked neck to his impossibly long, narrow tail, he is a horrific sight to behold. And he roars—oh, how he roars! A high-pitched, deafening screech that drowns out all other sounds, and is enough to drive anyone to madness.

When I was little, I cowered in fear, retreating to my room and hiding underneath my blankets, praying desperately that he would not find me. He always did. He would circle me, mocking me and my cowardice, and then he would leave. Perhaps he was waiting for me to grow older, bigger, to become more worthy of an opponent. Perhaps he didn’t know I was there. Perhaps he was toying with me, like a cat with a mouse, knowing that he would return.

He returns often, though with no pattern. Sometimes he leaves us alone for weeks. Sometimes, though, he visits multiple times a day. Those are the days I dread the most. It is bad enough I must defend my family from a monster once, but twice in one day is exhausting. Still, it is up to me to protect my people. I owe my life to them, and for them, I would give my life. 

It has been some time since his last arrival, maybe two or three weeks before my little sister was born. As one can imagine, my parents have both been incredibly exhausted caring for me and the little one, although I have done my best to help where I am able. They know I can’t do much, but they appreciate what I do contribute. Like protecting the home from threats.

She is a month old now, and she has never known the monster. I pray that it stays that way. She does not deserve to feel the fear I have been plagued with all my life. No, she deserves joy, and love, and peace. I intend to provide her with such comforts to the best of my ability. 

We are napping in the living room one afternoon when I am awoken by our mother shouting to our father. 

“Matthew, darling, would you take the baby to the other room? I need to vacuum. The carpet is disgusting.”

“Yes, dear, I’ll be right there,” our father replied to her. A moment later, he was taking my napping sister away from me. 

“Why are you taking her?” I asked him but was met with a harsh shushing.

“No barking, Musubi, the baby is sleeping. Let me get her out of the room before you go nuts.”

I didn’t understand what he was talking about. I’m not crazy, I’m not prone to fits of rage, I’ve been nothing but caring to my little sister since the day she came home, I’ve even taken to – 

And then I heard him. He was back in my home, threatening my parents, myself, and now an innocent infant. Instantly, my ears perked up, and I sensed he was behind me, making his way around the kitchen. He hadn’t seen me yet; from where I was on the couch, I was hidden by the kitchen island. If I used my location to my advantage, I would have the upper hand. I could attack. I could save my family.

I sprang into action without a second thought. Our battle has raged for years, with him always the victor, retreating only to return when I least expect him. It’s my turn. It’s my time. I am going to fight for my family, for my honor. No more cowardice, no more empty threats. Today is the day I defeat him once and for all.

After making my way to the kitchen island, I lowered myself to the ground and watched him move in that jerking, unsettling way. Every time I see him, he appears more disgusting, proudly displaying his prey through his strangely transparent stomach. Nothing about him is right. He needs to be stopped.

As he turned the corner, I pounced, wrapping my sharp teeth around his stomach in an attempt to disembowel him, only to be met with pain. He seemed to be wearing some sort of armor, perhaps an exoskeleton even, to protect his innards.

“Musubi!” My mother said. She must have been so surprised to see me finally standing up to the creature that has plagued our family for so long, attacking instead of yelling. I hope I make her proud as I fight what may be my final battle.

Releasing my grip, I aimed for his ankle and once again found the protective armor. It seemed to be covering his whole body.

“Musubi cut it out,” mother said to me. That selfless woman: she has spoiled me my entire life, and now she insists on fighting this monster single-handedly. What an amazing woman she is. I knew I could not leave her alone; this fight was mine. 

I decided to go for the tail next. Since it moved around so fluidly, surely it wouldn’t have the same protective covering as the rest of the monster’s body. Moving quickly, I bit down as intensely as I could, and pulled hard. A moment later, the beast stopped yelling.

I had done it. I had slayed the beast. I couldn’t believe it. After all these years of howling, pushing him away but never truly defeating him, finally, I had done it. I had slayed the beast.

Mother noticed immediately. She began laughing, surely relieved that the monster’s reign of terror was over. “Alright, Musubi, you win. I’ll vacuum tomorrow.”

She picked up the corpse of the beast, hiding it away in the closet, likely for the coroner to remove in the morning. Or perhaps a scientist.

She made her way to the couch and patted the spot next to her, my spot. I dutifully hopped up, ready to bask in the glory of my victory. Her hands immediately buried themselves in my fur and found my favorite spots. “Who’s a good boy?” She asked me. 

I am, mother. I am a good boy.

August 16, 2024 07:44

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