Hephaestus Riders

I'm lost without a compass.

Not literally, of course. I couldn't have possibly reached Deep Desert City if I hadn't had a compass.

I'm a cargo man now, and I spend my days unloading cargo (what else could it be?) for the Dao family, who sell and ship food and other necessities to the Deep Desert City, the epicenter of the Ra-eai Empire. And so it goes.

The compass part refers to me. On the inside. 

Above me, riders backed on Hephaestus - large slippery creatures - ride freely. They know where they're going. Next June, they'll arrive in Dourport, and then July in Rezund. But after that, for a half-year, they're free. To do, go, fly wherever they want. But what if you don't know what you want?

"Hey- hey you!"

I turn around to see Penny Dao shaking her finger at another cargo man. 

"Be back before sunset, you hear me?"

It's not me she's shouting at, but that order would apply to everyone. As I unload my crate, I wave goodbye to my family friend and scatter toward the taverns and brothels even deeper in the city.

It happened that there was a festival today of all days, and I moved towards the large podium and stage, wondering what was happening. In front of me, a performer downed a bottle of liquidized bird remains. Gross.

So I moved away, settling comfortably at another table, a glass of ambrosia warming my hands.

"Tashi?"

I turned, wondering who had spoken my name. There was no one else at this small block of a table. Maybe it was a fairy or some irritating species like that. I turned back around.

"Who?" someone else asked. "What did you say?"

"Ah, nothing. I didn't say anything. Can you pass the mead?"

Again, I turned my head. Oh. Behind me were some Hephaestus riders, dressed in typical Hephaestus rider gear: thick netted gloves to handle the slipperiness of those flying fish- like sky creatures, another netted rope around their waist, and webby unfashionable boots.

One of the riders, the one that had probably said my name, was very tall with a large build and had striking green hair that was done in many braids today. Her name was Libra, after some hokey-pokey zodiac sign trash her parents believed in. She was an ogre, the only one of her kind I'd seen in a Hephaestus riders unit. 

I hadn't seen her in years.

And I thought I'd never see her again.

But I turned away again, finished my drink, and got up. The literally heavenly taste of ambrosia was off in my mouth, and I washed it away with a little water.

"Oof!"

The small amount of water that was left in my glass tipped over as someone bumped into me, the water hitting them square in the face. They rose, unshaken.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, mister," Libra said, bowing deeply. "You must know ogres aren't very smart. Forgive me."

"That's... alright... miss," I said, scratching the back of my head. I knew what the reputation was ogres was like, but I also knew that Virgo's intelligence was still quite similar to that of a human. It always felt weird when she said something like this. It was quite awkward. I never was quite a very good actor.

"So sorry, mister." 

This time it was a different voice, a man or boy. He sauntered up, patting Libra's back.

"My coworker here isn't very smart," he said, grinning, like it was an inside joke. "That's how ogres are. Not very blessed in the brains department."

"Ah..." I said, gritting my teeth a little. "I didn't know that."

He was oblivious to her seething, it seemed. While the rest of their team moved forward to see what was going on, I sized him up. As expected, his jacket was heavily marked up, indicating that he was a rookie. He hadn't spent enough time with the Hephaestus riders to lose those marks. And not enough time to gain humility either, it seemed. On the other hand, Libra's jacket was near spotless, and I felt a sudden surge of pride as I saw her jacket. She'd even managed to lose the Velvet Mark, making her almost one of the top riders in the world. She was far his senior.

The rookie continued to introduce himself and his profession, like I'd never heard of Hephaestus riders before, and I groaned internally.

"So nice to meet you," I said cutting him off. "But I was just about to put away my ambrosia. Could you wait for a minute?"

I put it away, and when I returned to grab my coat I found it had been moved to the other table, where the riders were sitting. Oh gods, seriously?

"Well, I'm back." I said.

"Welcome back! So, what do you do? You here for the festival?" the man asked. Though I'd been technically listening to his self-centered spiel a little while ago, I hadn't bothered to remember his name. That was too bad for him.

"I'm a cargo man," I said, wrapping my jacket around me. "I came here on business. I didn't even know there was a festival today, but I suppose that's a happy accident."

Virgo looked up.

"So I need to be heading back towards the outskirts. They've gotten some rooms for us, probably, and I'd like to get a good one if possible."

"Oh, but we have so much to -"

"Hey, about that jacket," I said, frowning. "There's a lot of badges. Does that mean you're high ranked or something?"

His face fell, and he turned away. I smiled, walking out of the festival. I hoped that broken ego never healed.

"W-wait!" 

It was Virgo, running after me. "I... uh... want to apologize again for bumping into you. Would you mind if I walked you to your destination?"

I nodded, pleased, and we moved away from the area.

-

"So, a cargo man? Why?" Virgo asked. We sat on the steps of some building, close to the outskirts. I hadn't talked to someone for this long for such a while.

I shrugged. "I mean, the opportunity came to me. The Dao family are friends of my mom, and she put in a nice word for me. I still get to travel, and I get paid fairly, so it's nice."

I looked up at the sky, annoyingly full of stars, and sighed. "It sucks how I had to keep myself hidden there. I totally wanted to pummel up that rookie. So cheeky. You should've just given it to him right in the jaw like Lt. Horas does. It would've served him right."

Virgo sighed. "I wish. But you remember what happened last time, right?" she asked, tilting her head. She glanced at the stars as well, and I wondered if we had the same thought about them.

"Yes, of course, I remember, miss General Virgo," I said. "You gained two marks for hitting that other worm. But still."

"I won't be able to touch him - even without the ogre situation. There's a reason he's such a startup. Guess who's kid he is?"

"Horas? Apostol? Jaime?" I asked.

"Nope. The Lt. Feist herself." 

"Oh dang," I said, letting a breath out. "I think I might even feel sorry for him now," I said, thinking for a moment. 

"Nah, he's still a jerk." I decided.

Virgo laughed. She moved her eyes towards the sky. 

"The stars are annoyingly present today," she said. I nodded.

There was silence for a while, but it was comfortable. It was normal, even, despite all the time we'd spent away. I realized I hadn't felt this normal for a while.

"So, are you planning on ever coming back?" she asked. 

"Doesn't seem like it."

"Why?"

"There's no reason for me to." I said, shrugging. Maybe it was time to leave. "Willow and I wanted to become Hephaestus Riders, so we joined. Sure, it was fun. But it wasn't worth it, eventually. I don't see a point in going back."

"I don't believe the only reason you were a Rider was the money." Virgo said.

I turned my head away. 

"It's getting late," I said. "I'll see you tomorrow, maybe."

"Tashi, please. I know Willow isn't with us anymore, but have you ever thought of what you want, for once?"

My hands moved to my head, and I jerked upwards. 

"I don't know what I want!" I yelled. 

I regretted it as the noise turned heads, and so I sat back down, curling up.

Next to me, Virgo made a noise in her throat.

"Let's talk about it, hmm?" she said softly. I nodded.

-

The only reason I'd even ever considered becoming a Hephaestus Rider was because of Willow. And now she was gone. So it was simple, in my head. I couldn't survive alone in this competitive world of Riders. Sure, we were getting closer to the top, somewhere near the level of a senior officer, but it was still a long way to go. Did I want to be there, catching the stars? I didn't know.

So I quit. Simple.

As we talked, Virgo asked me if I was happy as a cargo man. What my purpose in life was. Whether I was happier in the old days and if, again, I wanted to go back. 

Like before, I didn't know. 

Lost without a compass, I was.

It was sad to admit that I didn't have any - anymore, at least - goals for the future. She asked me if my days felt as if they had worth, and I shrugged. I didn't know how that felt. I woke up, worked, ate, and slept. Every day, all year. This was how life was, wasn't it?

The thoughts didn't exit my head even after Virgo had to leave - Rider duties, of course - and I returned back to the outskirts. The thing about them reserving rooms for us was a lie - we didn't have the money for that - and so I restlessly rolled over in my shared tent instead. In my mind were flapping winds. The outrageously ugly faces of Hephaestus. Did I want this? 

Virgo explained clearly that if I wanted to come back, I had to be there before noon tomorrow, when they'd return back. After that, there was no guarantee that I'd be able to get there, since basically the only way to get there was - you guessed it! - a Hephaestus.

This was a safe job. There was no risk of being fired, and I always got the first pick on meals. People liked me, and I liked them back. It was easy, and a good life.

But then again, when I saw those annoying birds flying in the sky... there had been times where I wanted to be one of them again. Was it enough? What did I want?

What did I want?

I fell into a fitful sleep, and woke the next dawn with a headache.

"Hey, time to go," I heard from beside me. Oh, it was time to report to the caravans.

I sighed, getting up on my feet. This was the moment. I moved forward.

-

"Hands correctly placed, please, Keaton. You don't want to harm it. Yes, that's better, and keep it like that for the rest of the journey." Virgo said in the center of town. It was noon, and the birds were chirping. The Daos and the rest of the cargo men left in an hour, and I was here to see Virgo.

As Virgo finally looked at me, I smiled. 

"Tashi? You're here! But Tashi..."

She sighed a long sigh, coming to hug me. "Goodbye, then."

I smiled, patting her head before realizing that the rookie had done the same thing yesterday to demean her. I hugged her instead.

"I'm coming with you, Virgo," I said with a laugh. "I gave the Dao family a notice and left."

"W-what? Really? Why? Really?"

I laughed.

"But you don't have gear on? Wait, do you even have gear? You know you can't come without gear, right?" she asked. "I'm so sorry..."

"Relax, Virgo! I have gear. It's over there. I was hoping you'd be able to put your departure off for a few minutes while I got it on, though."

"Yes, of course," she said hurriedly. "A few minutes are fine. But how'd you even get it?"

"Uh, what's his name? Baichi? Well, you know how much he likes to talk, so I invited him for a drink a few hours after I woke up. He fell unconscious. And then I took his gear. Simple."

Virgo tried to stop herself from laughing, but it didn't work. She pulled herself together finally, with a smile still lingering on her face.

"It's fine, Virgo," I said, the smile returned. "You know they'll pick him up soon. And it'll do him some good to reflect on his actions. I bet he hadn't even thought of the idea that the guy he's spent an hour talking to about his Rider career was a Rider himself."

"Alright," she said, grinning. "But only since I know Lt. Feist will pick him up soon. So, you decided to be a Rider again, then?"

I let out a breath.

"Being a Rider..." I said, thinking. "Willow was the reason I started. But the reason I come back... it's the feeling of being in the sky, free as a- well, a Hephaestus themselves. Without being a Rider, my life is empty. I don't know what to do with my life anymore. So I decided, finally, that maybe I'll try this path again. When I'm in the sky... I feel like I have a compass inside myself. It tells me where to go, and it makes me feel as if the trials awaiting are worth it. So... I'm going to try."

I smiled.

Virgo's eyes shone, and she hugged me again. "You won't regret this!" she said.

"Well if I do, I'll be so angry," I joked. "I'll demand payment from you, then. You better pay it up."

So I climbed upon the last empty, awaiting Hephaestus. It licked me as I boarded, and I grinned. When we rose into the sky, I finally realized what I had been missing. 

I was free.