The Calm After a Storm

On January 1^st Cindy Rona Loper was stuck inside her office building. She was the only one there which wasn’t very surprising, as her co-workers had made a habit of having Cindy pick up their slack. She raised her head from the mountain of work to stare out the window and realized that it was snowing hard. It was a blizzard though that didn’t mean much. She already knew she would be stuck in this office for many more hours to come. Despondently, she slaved paper upon paper, resigned to the miserable state in which her life had taken place.  It was now three AM and she was only halfway through; she’d have to take the pile home and double up on her work tomorrow. There was a lot more than usual. Had they finally decided to just give her all their work? Frustrated, Cindy took the papers and threw them across the room. The stack was heavy enough to make it there and they came out of their neat shape upon impact. The action did little to satisfy her rage and she collapsed into her chair, putting her hands over her eyes. The tears came instantaneously, as if on cue and she settled into her usual routine. The sobs always came after a work overload and she kept thinking that maybe she’d run out of tears to spill but that had never happened. She felt pathetic, crying at her work desk and doing the tasks of others because she was too much of a push over to say no. Here she was at the start of a new year and there was nothing that had changed. She was still the same person, still doing the same work that was never hers. When she had graduated college, she saw herself working hard but never had she once thought that she would suffer because of her timid tendencies. What a disappointment she had become.

“So, are you done with your self-loathing yet? I want to show you something.” With a start, Cindy sat up and looked at the man that had appeared before her. His smile seemed to light up the room and after a moment she realized that his whole body was indeed glowing. His toned arms were crossed at his chest and his height forced her to look up to see his face. He had blond hair and the bluest eyes she had ever seen. How had she not noticed him before? He raised an eyebrow and she cursed herself. She’d been staring. Though in all honesty, who wouldn’t?

“Who are you? And are you aware that you’re glowing? At this, he laughed. A full, real laugh. The kind of laugh that you can’t help smiling at.

“Well, Ms. Loper, my name is Ezra, and I am of the Lucians.” She stared in confusion and he just smiled not giving any further explanation. After a moments silence his eyes sparkled as if remembering something and he raised a hand to cover a smile. “How kind of you to point out my glow, I do try.”

She squinted her eyes at him. Was he serious? How did he know her name? And what was a Lucian? How had he even gotten into the building? Feeling wary, she slowly got up out of her chair. He noticed as soon as she started moving and rolled his eyes.

“I’m not going to harm you, Ms. Loper, I’m here to help. That’s what we Lucians do.” He flashed her a smile with teeth this time and she couldn’t help but gape. He was beautiful. His eyes seem to sparkle with excitement and his hair was almost a white blond which brought out the tan of his skin even more. Cindy wasn’t a very religious person but if it weren’t for the fact that he called himself a Lucian, she would have believed him an angel. He gave off this carefree vibe that was oozing confidence. Something she would never have, it seemed. The stark contrast between the two was nothing short of obvious. She never smiled like that; her burdens weighed too heavily on her shoulders. There was no room for breaks, she just didn’t live like he did. She survived, there was a difference.

As if noticing the change of her mood, his eyes took on a gentle quality that made her want nothing more than to crawl into his arms and curl her back to the coldness of reality. He must have sensed her need because before she even realized what was happening his arms were around her and her tense muscles finally relaxed as she sank into his embrace. It was even better than she imagined. The warmth radiating from his body encompassed her entirely and it was as if time had stopped, causing all her worries to fade into nothingness. How strange it was, to feel safer in the arms of a stranger than she had ever felt in her whole life. He was a complete and utter stranger but a well of trust had formed in her and it demanded to be let out, so she let it. Strength had returned to her limbs and she found herself putting her arms around him, returning the gesture. He gasped as if he was surprised and squeezed her tighter for a moment more before slowly pulling away. She looked up at him as he did and found that he was not smiling. His eyes bore an unearthly intensity and she flushed under his gaze. He straightened himself up and offered her his hand.

“Will you allow me to help you?” His eyes stayed locked on hers and though this situation was nothing but suspicious she couldn’t help but trust him. She smiled.

“Yes.” Her hand found his and he pulled her towards himself, bending to pick her up bridal style. She gave a surprised squeak and found that her feet were not touching solid ground as they had been seconds before. They were flying.

These next few events felt like they had happened over the course of a few hours, but it only took a minute or so. Images had flashed through her and before she knew it, she was in her old house. The house she had shared with her late mother until she has turned eighteen. It was all achingly familiar, and tears started to form at her eyes. This was where her mother had taken her final breath because of an abusive husband. The image of the scene was as vivid to her as the day it had taken place but as Ezra carried her through the house to her mother’s room, she realized that was not what he had brought her to see. The door was already open, and it revealed a young woman sitting with a man who had his arms around her in a loving embrace. It was her parents. Well, it was her parents from thirty years ago. Her father was staring at his wife’s bloated stomach in wonder and she couldn’t believe it was him. Her father had never shown love like that and there was not a moment that she remembered them ever looking that happy. What had gone wrong? Was Ezra showing her the reality she had yearned for? She squeezed her eyes shut and turned her head away, but Ezra shook his head.

“This is your history, and you must learn from it.” So, she did. Slowly, she turned her head back and braced herself as she opened her eyes. The scene was sickeningly sweet. It would have been heart warming if she did not know how things would turn out. Her mother turned to look at her father.

“If I die while giving birth you must promise me that you’ll take care of our baby.” There was steel in her eyes. Cindy remembered that steel as her mother endured injury after injury, still finding the strength to raise her. Her father returned her gaze with a look of his own.

“You are not going to die before our baby girl is born.” The irony.

“How do you know it’s going to be a girl?”

“I just do. She’s going to be beautiful just as her mother was.”

“Was?” She glared at him and he laughed for a long time.

“I’m just kidding, Honey. You will always be beautiful to me.” She sighed as she shook her head though she was grinning. Their happiness was almost painful to watch.

“She’s not even born yet, and I already want to shield her from the horrors of this world. I want to keep her in a bubble far from other people and see her grow up with all she could ever want, even though I know that would never work out. Does that sound childish?” Her father looked at her intently as if considering what to say.

“No. I think that just makes you a mother. I too, would like to give her anything if it meant she would be happy and that means that I’m just an ordinary father. We all want our children to grow up to be exemplary citizens but none of us really stop to think what that means. We are going to have to let go and let them lead their own life. They’re going to get hurt but then that means they will learn to heal. There is no doubt that they’ll fall but then they will get back up. We learn through experience and if we kept her in a bubble, she would grow to be fragile in both body and mind.” Her mother leaned back into her father.

“You’re right. You are going to make an amazing father. It’s amazing how we can love someone whom we don’t even know.” Instead of responding he lowered his cheek to rest on her head and they drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

Another flurry of images crowded her head until they settled on a particular one. Her father was pacing around a room while reading a piece of paper. A letter of termination. He’d been fired. He crumbles the paper while there are cries of a child in the background. He turns to sit at his desk and sees a beer bottle lying there. He picks it up with a reproachful look and almost drops it as a wail, louder than before, sounds through the house. He lifts it to his mouth and thus marked the end of their happy life.

Sometime while watching her parents she had started crying. Sobs racked at her being and she couldn’t stop them. She wasn’t aware enough to realize Ezra had taken her back to her office, but she did know he was hugging her. She could feel it in the way his warmth gave her surety. Surety that everything was going to be okay. And when she thought about it, everything would be okay. All of what she had witnessed was of the past, but it was heartbreaking. At least before she only knew the cruelty of a faulty marriage, now she knew what was and what could have been. Just as she’d been given hope it had been crushed. Her father could not be the source of all her irrational blame anymore, not when she’d seen how he was and how his undoing was caused by the stress of having a family. They had wanted her to be strong. They both had loved her unconditionally, even if she did not remember it. Her father had cared. Cindy had spent years convincing herself that she did not care that her father did not love her, but she’d always known that to be a lie. Her parents’ love had been a tragedy but for there to be a tragedy there first must be love.

“Cindy?” Ezra was pulling away from her again and she took hold of his hand as she tilted her head to meet his eyes.

“Yes?”

“You know, when the boss sends us to help people out, we’re not supposed to stay for long, but I’ve always been a rebel.” He gave her a crooked grin and she didn’t doubt him as she wondered what trouble he’d caused for his higher ups, but her mind was too focused elsewhere to truly ponder the idea. Who was Ezra? What was Ezra?

“Usually, I don’t make a habit of throwing myself at men I’d just met so I would say we’re both a little crazy.” She said this with a smile of her own. A true smile. It has been a long time since she felt this clear, it was as though she’d been living in a haze that was now lifted. She’d never realized how much her unsolved issues with her parents had weighed down on her.

Ezra squeezed her hand and stood up, his grip on her firm. “Come.”

“I don’t know if I can take another of your memory trips tonight. I think one mental breakdown is enough for me.” Laughing, he tugged her along to the doors of the building. When they walked out, Cindy gasped. The snow had eased up and it was like the world around them had reached a standstill. Snow flurries fell slowly and the familiar lake she’d driven past a thousand times took on a new shape. It was startlingly beautiful and solid. The blizzard had passed. The harsh storm that had torn through her world had settled down and shown its true beauty.

Ezra had started running and since he had refused to let go of her, she was forced to keep up, not that she minded. The cold air hurt her lungs, but she couldn’t stop laughing. They were headed toward the lake and she knew it was a horrible idea. She started running faster. When they finally reached the lake, she hesitated. When had she gotten so adventurous? What happened if she hurt herself or embarrassed herself in front of Ezra? Feeling her hesitate, he whirled around. His eyes bore the same intensity as they had when this had all begun.

“I won’t let you fall.” Her worries dissipated just as fast as they had come. He already had his feet on the ice and was holding his hands out to her. She took them and with his help, tentatively, she took a step.

Cindy had never been good on her feet but as she wobbled on the lake, she found that she did not care. Ezra never let go of her and soon they were dancing. First it was slow and careful, then as she gained her confidence they twirled and dipped. They did not speak much, there was no need. They spoke in actions, in gazes. This stranger had come into her life and through the course of a night he had irrevocably changed it. She wondered where he came from and how it was possible for him to show her events that had happened years past but for now, she would enjoy the moment. That was a mystery for tomorrow.

             On January 1^st Cindy Rona Loper had started the new year with a new life. She had cried in anguish and cried in happiness and through it all she had found the courage to begin again. As she danced with Ezra and looked up, she saw a full moon. It was bright and unbelievably breathtaking.