My name is Alice Keller and I have a special power. And that is my super vision. "Why is it called a 'super' vision?" you might ask. That is because it is extremely powerful: i can track anyone i want and find them easily. My family, my friends and my boyfriend, Tim. I usually focus mostly on him. I know where he is and I can find him easily. Whether he goes shopping, watches TV, reads or goes out with his friends, I know it all. Of course, I don't use my vision because I don't trust him or anything, it's just that I want to make sure he's okay. I never told him about it, as I wanted it to be my little secret. Truth be told, I didn't have this vision all my life, but rather after two years into our relationship.
Ever since we started dating, I've been counting the days we've been together. We used to go to the same kindergarten and whenever we played a game, we kept track of one's record, whether that was in points or wins, using tally marks. Therefore, I decided to use them to count our time spent together as a token of our childhood memories. "1", "2", "3"...I wrote them firstly in my diary, but I soon realised that i needed more space, so I decided to use the wall in my room.
I wrote them with a black marker. Before I knew it, we've already been together for 658 days and I had to use the second wall as well and take off all the posters I had. These walls mean a lot to me. They're like my modest works of art.
Well they were...until I woke up one morning and saw my precious marks gone. All of them! All my work had gone to shreds! It's like they vanished into thin air unexplainably. There was nothing but a pearl white surrounding me. It was a shade of white that my walls weren't painted in before. Truth be told, only the fourth wall with the window was left unfinished and i might have had to use the ceiling too, so i needed more space anyway. For that, i should be thankful. But someone to do that without even asking me...to tear down the work that i strived for... That is utterly unacceptable!
I knew exactly who the culprits were: my parents. When I thought that to myself, I looked around my room to see if anything else had changed and whether or not i hadn't paid enough attention to my surroundings. The bed, the carpet, the closet...Maybe they changed something else without my permission. I checked every single piece in my room and besides the walls, nothing else seemed to be out of the ordinary.
Except for one note that was on my desk. It said:
"Dear Alice,
We know you love Tim very much, but you need to move on. You know very well how much we love you and we want you to be happy and at peace. Please forgive us for painting your wall. We're only doing this for your own good.
Love,
Mom and Dad"
Before reading that note, i was angry at my parents for doing such a horrible thing to me. However, i realised that parents always want the best for you. And I couldn't be mad at them for long. But they can't understand you like you do. Only you can understand yourself. I knew they never agreed to let us be together, but this isn't some 'Romeo and Juliet' bullshit. This is real life. I was ready to discuss with them on that matter. But before that, I needed to find a pen and a piece of paper to write down that day. Luckily, I have a good memory and i remembered that it was supposed to be the 790th day. I never forget important things like this.
As I was writing the day on the yellowish toned page of an old notebook i've found, i heard the sound of someone parking his car. I knew it had to be my parents. I went downstairs to see what they were doing. I forgot to mention something about my vision: i can also hear and see people without them hearing or seeing me. "How do I do that?" you might ask. Easy. I just close my eyes and let my vision guide me. It's just like a lucid dream or an astro-projection type of power. Pretty cool, huh? My parents came in one after another. I was assuming they were coming back from their workplace.
"How was work today? " my mom asked.
"Nothing out of the ordinary. How about you? "
"Carrie asked me to take her place tomorrow at the conference."
"Again? Can't she do her own job? "
"Apparently she's sick and no one else can go in her place. "
Listening to your parents' same boring conversation isn't something that I usually do, but today I made an exception. I just enjoyed watching them laughing at the same old jokes and them simply sharing a comforting smile. A sort of nostalgic feeling hit me: I felt like if there was only the two of them on this planet, they could have found their own happiness through any harships regardless. While I was thinking about that, there was a moment of silence between my parents that was broken by my mom's question:
"Hey" she asked softly, but in a rather sad tone "do you think we did the right thing? With her walls i mean. " There came silence again for a few seconds and then my dad said: "I think it's for the best. "
That immediately reminded me of Tim and of the fact that this is the type of relationship i aspire to have. Come to think of it, our communication had gotten weaker nowadays. I needed to talk to him more.
I used my vision again to check on what he was doing: i searched for him while thinking about his face, his smile, his warm hands and body, as well as all the great moments we had together. I centered all the emotions I had inside of me and focused on a clear image. That's when Monoug Avenue 257. "He's moved to another apartment without telling me?" "I asked myself." I wish he would have told me. " I thought that maybe he just didn't want to hurt me. He had always been such a kind man.
I decided to leave a note to my parents and, to make them aware of my existence, I started scratching the wall. My parents looked at it in shock, both gasping in terror.I told them: "I love you, but I love Tim too and I need to see him."
I went to visit Tim at his new apartment. Everything could be seen pretty clearly if you looked outside at his bedroom window. He was watching television, as usual. Probably some old movie of his. I watched him for a few minutes or so, anxious about whether or not I should call him to tell him that I'm outside. I was sure he was just as excited as I was,but as I was looking at him i realised that there was another person in the room. A woman. She was sitting on a chair, reading a book. I waited patiently and analysed the situation. "Is it his sister Susan? No, it can't be. " The assumptions that came after that one turned out to be true as the girl came to Tim who was standing on the bed and they started making out. I couldn't even describe my fury and how disgusted i was at that point. I've invested so much time and energy in this relationship and he was cheating on me with another girl? I had to get my revenge.
I immediately entered their room and started scratching their wall. Turning to the source of the sound, the girl that was smooching my boyfriend so passionately turned screaming in horror and immediately let go of Tim. I drew as many lines as possible, to remind him of his one true love and the time we've spent together.
"No way... Alice? " i could hear his now mature voice.
I took a closer look at his scared face.
Tim had grown up. He looked and sounded more mature. Maybe that's why I chose him in the first place.
I watched him rush to his car and drive a long way to the cemetery. I no longer cared for the girl. This was between me and Tim.
I saw him getting out of the car, approaching the place i was watching him from and heard him scream angrily from the top of his lungs:
"What the fuck do you want from me, Alice? We are not together anymore, so why are you still counting the days?"
I was shocked and wanted to answer to his absolutely rude attitude, but I couldn't say a word. That's when he continued abruptly, but in a calm tone:
" Look... You're dead, Alice. That's just the reality. Plus, I met someone new and... I'm sorry, but I have to move on. And you need to do that too. So please, I'm begging you from the bottom of my heart, stop doing this. "
I never expected him to be so direct to me. He left me speechless. Well, not that I was able to talk to him anyway. Plus, I'm in a fucking cascet buried in the dirt. Telling me off like that in front of my tomb. In public. With all the other dead people. I left the cascet to see him one last time and watched him leave the cemetery walking straight ahead to his car and without looking back.
My name is Alice Keller and I have a special power. And that is being a ghost. And if there's one thing I wish right now, that would be to have a body again so I could let out all the tears I have kept inside of me for so long.
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