The Other Kind Of Urban Farmer

"I knew that someday our time would come again," says Adam with a delighted smile on his face.

Adam, a modern french man, has a dark red brighter yellow family secret. His long family line was originally — and some lines still are! — native to Montreuil, a suburb of Paris. Back in the day — the 1870s — his family came to fame in this place when they received a large contract from the nice & mighty people of Paris. They were contracted to build a roughly 373 square miles large maze of fruit walls.

As you probably know what a maze is, I will tell you what a fruit wall is. Imagine a 10' wall. Now imagine that this wall is facing south. Don't forget to add to the wall all the southern sun-loving fruits that are planted close to it. After you have one wall in your mind, now add several, a dozen, more to it. All of them are placed in a way that a non-local has no chance of ever coming out of it again. It is a true maze. Now turn the fruits that are planted near the wall into peaches, and you have the biggest achievement of Adam's family in front of your eyes.

The fruits were so good that several people even preferred them to the ones that came from the south! You can probably imagine that those fruit walls were popping up all over the place, and always with a family member of Adam in charge.

War, war never changes, but the landscape did change, and with it, all fruit walls were destroyed throughout Europe.

Those greenhouses weren't the only achievement, and no eyesore, in the always shifting landscape of a city; they were as well a net positive from an ecological standpoint, and that is something one can't really say about modern greenhouses.

"I am happy that your line still knows how to build those!" states the mayor of the city while shaking Adam's hand in an overly happy way. 

"Oh, please! Nothing to thank for!" comments Adam while trying to catch up with the energy of this overwrought mayor. "My family was literally built to build this way."

"You can't imagine how stoked I reacted when—"

"You saw my fruit walls? That is normal, although I hope," — Adam reacts with skeptical words as the photographer of the press rain down flashes on both of them during the greeting — "that this is not another publicity stunt. Good for you that I didn't instantly see the photographers, or I would have gone home in the same moment"

"No, no! No publicity stunt!" The mayor states as a flashlight light up his already Hollywood-level white teeth.

Adams stays skeptical, still the energy-based life form that the mayor is pulling him in the direction of a conference room.

The door opens, and instantly several people gaze after Adam. That starts off nicely, Adam thinks to himself while fighting his natural reaction to this scene which is commonly known as eye-rolling. 

"Be nice, one could expect such a thing." The mayor notes.

It would even be nicer if you told me ahead of time that I have to do such a thing, is Adam's mind's first reaction, but despite that he friendly nods in the direction of the mayor, and enters the room.

"I'm Mr ..., the ministry of plantation, trees, flowers, beaches, rivers, and seas"

"I'm Ms ..., the ministry for hedges, fountains, public parks, and public baths"

I'm rather sure that a city with a minister for hedges either has too much money, and therefore can easily build fruit walls, or is completely incompetent, and therefore can never build fruit walls, wonders Adam as he tries to assess whatever those people and situation are.

"I'm Mr ..., ministry of tree stealing, crime, and justice"

Why is tree stealing not part of the ministry of plantation? Adam is baffled by the redundancy of the organization. That tree stealing is part of the name of one ministry doesn't even faze him anymore.

Adam has accepted that he left paradise.

Adam has accepted that he has entered hell.

I just want to go back to my trees, Adam thinks as he can't imagine the situation getting any better. This is the reason why he more or less ignores the introductions of the other members, hoping that they won't be important. He hopes in vain.

"We read about you and your work," Mr ? of the ministry of ? starts off his monologue. "I really like it, and I can see it being a big success."

But! Adam mentally interrupts the monologue

"We gathered material.

We gathered money.

We gathered space.

We gathered connections,

and now without much ado, we can say: 'We want you to build a fruit wall maze, just like your ancestor did.' No! It will be even better! 750 square miles we give you, and the money you need. We want you to build something like a modern Hanging Gardens here in France. In this 20th century, people started to disrespect France's culture, and WE CAN'T STAND IT", the minister says and shouts. 

Adam is hyped. Sure, sure, he was skeptical at the start, but being french himself he knows how a French man reacts — No! Must react! — when someone tries to bring french culture down. He looks straight at the Mr of the ministry of if-I-only-listened-more, hands in his pockets, and is starting to answer as it hits him.

"Wait," he starts. "Where do you have space for it?"

"That's simple." The Mr of tree stealing starts, happy as if he had hoped all the time that Adam will ask. "We bulldoze the slums that are around the city and build the fruit wall maze around the city. The people? We will send them to Africa to work in one of our colonies."

Adams's face looks like the face of any not completely insane planer. 

"Are you completely out of your mind?" Adam asks in a shouting way. _What the heck, those people are crazy. I should have left earlier._ Adam asses while his face goes through several grimaces.

"And you will start the bulldozing." He added.

"I? I won't do anything, all of you are completely i-n-s-a-n-e." Adam answers with a tone between anger, annoyance, and frustration. 

"Oh, you will." The minister of justice smugly says to Adam. "Or you will end in prison."

"For what am I supposed to go to prison?" Adam starts to gesticulate wildly, an onlooker couldn't be so sure anymore who is the most insane person in this room. "You know I have rights Mr what—"

"You remember your fruit walls?" The Ms of trees crashes into whatever this talk is.

"...yeah?" Adam keeps his hands by himself, wondering what will go wrong now.

"It violates the Wall Building Act of Paris from 1875. You can be executed for it, or spend 50 years in prison"

"This is absolute bull...," Adam starts, sweat on his front head. "I am 100% sure that there was no such thing when I got my license to built it"

"Well," the Ms of trees start. "You are wrong.—"

"I am right!" Adam shouts and points his finger directly at the Ms.

She adds without reacting to Adam, "The day before you put the spade for the first time into the ground to build the fruit walls was the day it was put into law."

"Wait." Adam is confused. "That wasn't in 1875, that was May 1910!"

The Ms comments, "It is a law that was oral before, therefore the name"

"No, it wasn't." Adam is as confused as angry, and increasingly bitter about the situation.

"It was" The Ms finishes him off.

For a minute or so the scene is silent.

"Okay, I do it. What else can I even do?" Adam asks rhetorical and bitter.

"Good, good." The mayor reacts to Adam agreeing to the job.

"How am I supposed to start the bulldozing?" He asks genuinely.

From the side, a butleresque looking person walks slowly towards Adam. He has a box in his hands. A box that is opened as soon as Adam can grab it.

"Explain this!" Adam commands without much power in his voice as he points at the gun in the box.

"The bulldozing will start this way." The Mr of justice explains, "You will take this gun, go towards the slums, and shoot the first child you see."

"I will what?" Once again Adam can't believe what he hears.

"Once you shoot someone the people will come after you—"

"Awesome!" Adams shout as he raises his hands, sarcasm is dripping from his lips.

"They will attack you, and we will use this attack on an honorable member of society to defend society and restore the slums into a good place!"

"I just hate everything about this" Adam thinks out loud. As he realizes what he said out loud he looks on the floor.

He takes the gun and leaves the rooms.

He puts the gun in his pocket, so nobody can see it.

He goes downstairs, the journalists are already waiting.

The Mr of justice says to the crowd of other ministers, "I hope he does it, we really need a cultural miracle here in France, or we will turn into American, German, or Brits with a French pass."

"Tell us about the avant-garde french future your project will bring!" A youngish journalist asks Adam with overt enthusiasm.

Adam adjusts his hand in the pocket and shot directly in the throat of the journalist. An ugly scene to watch. Adam gets another one and another one. Seven at one blow, before the now arriving police put a bullet in him.