Draw what you see

Submitted into Contest #131 in response to: Set your story in a drawing room.... view prompt

3 comments

Thriller Fantasy Crime

Jesus Nieves word count:2793

jnieves6556@gmail.com















DRAW WHAT YOU SEE


BY JESUS NIEVES

It's 3 am and Trevor can't sleep. He sits in his drawing-room; thinking of what to draw, for his next graphic novel. Trevor turns on his TV, hoping to get inspiration. He watches a documentary about serial killers. A light bulb goes off in his head, what if he created a character who is a serial killer. This killer is an artist, his art does the killing for him instead of using his bare hands. 

The killer draws out the murder scene of how he imagines killing his victims. Trevor runs to his drawing-room. He plans out the character’s look and motives for killing. Trevor decides to base the killer on him, a comic artist who struggles with life. A New Yorker who struggles to pay his bills. He has a boss who looks for any reason to fire him, and a landlord who harasses him about the rent. 

His girlfriend cheated on him with his brother on his birthday. The character has all the motives he needs. The next day, Trevor sits at his desk. A coffee cup slams right in front of him. He looks up, it’s his boss, Jake. Trevor wipes clean the coffee splats on his drawing board. Jake chews his donut, spitting chunks of it on Trevor, “nothing new I see” Jake says. 

Trevor, annoyed by Jake's very existence, replies “actually, I do”. Jake is in shock, “oh, what is it?” He says. Trevor spills the details. Jake loves it, pushing it because he has his bosses wanting new content that sells. “Go home, come back Friday morning with my issue,” he says. The pressure is on, Trevor has to finish a comic in three days. 

It’s 2:57 am, it’s pouring, only the sounds of rain kept him up. Trevor questions who he would kill as his character, Trent. He uses Jake as a character, who is killed in his office by drinking coffee mixed with hydrofluoric acid. It was easy, Jake would always carry his plastic tumbler. The setup would be Jake going to the bathroom, the killer will pour acid into the cup, letting Jake kill himself. Trevor, excited that he finally has the motivation, titles the graphic novel “one cup too many”. 

He finally gets to sleep when he hears knocking at his door, he opens the door groggy from being up late. It's Richard, the landlord, who always nags about rent but never kept the building livable or safe. Richard looked like the building itself, disgusting and unbearable. Trevor holds his breath from not swallowing the horrible stench that radiates from the man. Richard smiles, “two weeks and no rent, where’s my money?” He says. Trevor hated the fact that he had no heat and the bathtub is clogged for more than a month. He couldn’t stand his landlord, “you’ll get your money Friday, I promise” he says.  

Richard peeks in past Trevor, looking around the apartment. “In A space like this, I could get more than what you're paying for” he hints. Trevor restrains himself from saying what he really felt, “understood, I don’t want any trouble, you will have your money” he says. Richard takes a moment to think, “make it double… for making me wait” he says mockingly. Trevor wanted to burst in rage, the nerve of this man wanting and not fixing anything. He knew he had to suck it up because he had no other place to go. “Fine, … double,” he says. 

Richard loved the power of threatening someone's livelihood, and Trevor knew it. Richard leaves, Trevor slams his door shut. Trevor now has the second victim for his character, his landlord. He finds it perfect, what person doesn’t fantasize about ridding the world of slumlords. Trevor sits in his room, drawing the next victim for his character. He draws the landlord watching TV in his basement apartment. The landlord hears a knock on his door. He gets up to answer, noticing water rushing into the apartment. 

The landlord, alarmed, goes to check where the water is coming from. The landlord notices a pipe cracked letting the water run, filling the hallway with water almost knee-high. He turns the water off from the main switch. He returns to his apartment to grab his tool belt, but is shocked to see a man wearing tall rubber boots. The landlord also notices the man wearing a black trench coat, hooded and wearing a Guy Fawkes mask. The outfit didn’t strike fear in the landlord’s heart, it was the fact that the man had his TV in hand. 

The landlord tries to run wearing flip-flops. He falls to the ground, soaking his whole body. The killer didn’t give him a chance, he smashes the TV on the ground next to the landlord. Instantly, the landlord is fried by the electrical current from the TV. Trevor is spooked when he sees his lights flicker, but continues to finish his issue. Falling asleep on his desk, Trevor wakes to a loud knocking on his door. 

He opens the door, groggy from working late. Now wide awake, he sees two detectives standing in front of him. The detectives introduce themselves as Santiago and Davis. The two looked intense, like all work and no play. Santiago pulls out a notepad, he reads “you are Trevor miller, right?”, Trevor nods his head. Davis scoffs, “is that a yes or no?” he says. Trevor replies, “yes, what’s going on?”. 

The detectives look at each other, Santiago says, “did you notice or hear anything last night?”. Trevor replies, “no, I was drawing all night”. The two detectives chuckle, Davis says, “drawing?”. Trevor replies, “yes, am a comic artist…why?”. Santiago says, “it’s about your landlord… he was found dead by his apartment, one of your neighbors found him lifeless in a puddle of water”. Trevor feels his heart dropping to his feet, he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The detectives wait for Trevor to get himself together, Davis says, “if you remember anything or notice anything odd, give us a call”, he hands Trevor a card. 

The detectives leave Trevor to think about what they said. Trevor closes his door in disbelief that his landlord died the same way he illustrated in his issue. He runs to the bathroom, throwing up last night’s Chef Boyardee. Trevor rinses his face, trying to calm the anxiety he was feeling. He took a moment to look at himself in the mirror, but something in him felt different, his reflection was not him, instead, it was Trent, the killer looking back at him. The reflection smiled at him, Trevor knew what it meant.

 They are the same person, Trevor can kill and get away with it. At that moment, he didn’t feel bad for Richard. It was like a heavy weight lifted off his shoulders, knowing that Richard couldn't harass him anymore, made him feel powerful. Trevor’s phone buzzes, he answers it. His co-worker gives him the news of Jake being murdered at the office. Trevor gives his best performance, pretending he was devastated.

 The co-worker also tells him he is taking Jake's place until the board can make it final. Trevor's life has changed in two days, he doesn't have to worry about rent for the time being and is promoted with better pay. It's Friday morning, Trevor now sits in his office, which was previously occupied by Jake. Suddenly, he begins getting an intense headache. Trevor's mind shoots flashes of Jake and Richard dying. He snaps out of it to see on the wall a mirror, the killer is the reflection, looking back at him with the mask on. 

The killer removes the mask revealing Trent is Trevor, he can see the killer walking out of the mirror standing right in front of him. The two look each other up and down, mimicking each other's actions. They lock eyes, Trevor can see the darkness in Trent. The two smile at each other in a chilling, sinister kind of way, coming into the realization of becoming one. Trevor is interrupted by an employee, “sir, are you ok?” Trevor turns to look at the employee. He could see the man in fear by the way Trevor looked at him, and he loved every second of it, “yes?” He says. “The head honchos love the samples you sent, they want you to finish the issue,” the employee timidly says. 

Trevor could hear the voice of Trent, “let the terror begin” Trent says. Trevor sits in his office, he notices detectives Santiago and Davis questioning the employees. He felt confident to inquire about their visit. “ Detectives, what brings you here?” he says. The detectives look at each other, shocked to see Trevor in Jake’s office, “I thought you were just a comic artist?” Davis says sarcastically. Trevor sparingly smiles, not intimidated by the detectives. “I was promoted due to the tragic passing of Jake, as you already know,” he says. 

The detectives can see that Trevor didn't seem sympathetic about the death. “You seem unaffected by two deaths close to you, and now a promotion…looks like death has blessed you,” Santiago says. Trevor replies, “Death affects us all, good or bad, detective”. Santiago reads his notepad, “when was the last time you spoke with Jake?” He says. Trevor, knowing that he could never be caught, answers, “we spoke about a new graphic novel that had to be done by today, which explains my promotion” he says. Davis chuckles, “what a coincidence that your comic book is called one cup too many, odd, almost a reference,” he says. 

Trevor and Davis stare at each other for a moment, Trevor chuckles, “what are you trying to say?, Death by comic book, that sounds insane, detective” he says sarcastically. Davis, not liking the sarcasm, moves forward to strike Trevor but is stopped by Santiago. Santiago whispers in his partner's ear, telling him to walk away. Trevor in full confidence has seen enough cop shows to know what comes next. Santiago approaches Trevor, “Mr. Miller, we will stay in touch,” he says. Trevor nods his head, as Santiago walks away, he says “I hope you catch your guy!”. Santiago replies, “you can bet on it, Mr. Miller”.

Trevor sits in his drawing-room trying to come up with new ideas for the closing of his issue. He paces back and forth, thinking of what to draw next. Trevor looks through his desk drawer for inspiration. He finds an old photo, in it was Trevor, his ex-girlfriend, and best friend. He is reminded of painful memories. Rapid Flashes of his girlfriend Ashley cheating on him with his friend Barry. Trevor starts throwing things, filled with rage. He smashes his coffee mug at a mirror he uses for reference, to see Trent staring back at him. Trevor knew what Trent was telling him, that look meant that Ashley and Barry are next.

Detectives Santiago and Davis sit in a room with a computer tech who reviews CCTV footage for crime scenes. The tech says, “well guys, your killer is either stupid or crazy”. Santiago and Davis are puzzled, “why do you say that?” Santiago says. The tech types in keys to access footage of Jake's office, “here the killer is masked until he reaches the staircase, although no cameras by the stairs, you can see the killer removing his mask before the door closes shut”. The tech can see he has their attention, “what about the landlord who was murdered?” Davis says.

The tech chuckles, “that was easy, even though there's no camera in a basement apartment, I figured why not pull up footage from across the street, which a corner bodega has a Camera'' he says. The footage shows the killer walking up steps from the basement apartment, removing his mask, then entering the building. The detectives watch the footage with their eyes wide, confirming their number one suspect. Santiago grabs a phone nearby, he dials and lets it ring, “captain, we're gonna need a warrant, asap” he says. 

Trevor begins illustrating the climax to his graphic novel, fighting off an excruciating headache. He knows how his character will kill next. He met his ex through Liz, she works with him and happens to be Ashley’s best friend. Trevor overheard Liz talk about Ashley and Barry celebrating their anniversary this weekend. Liz avoided talking about them, but couldn't help herself gush over their romance. She mentioned Ashley wanting Liz to pick up a cake for the occasion.

Liz arrives, she knocks on the couple's door. Ashley, stuck in the kitchen, yells to Barry, “babe, could you get the door?” She shouts. Barry comes out of the bedroom, “I got it!” He says. Barry looks through the peephole and sees Liz with the cake. He opens the door, “let me help you with that” he says. Barry's eyes bulge out, looking down at his stomach to see he's been stabbed. He realizes the killer was hiding behind Liz's dead body, stabbing him from under her arms. The killer drops Liz, then stabs Barry several times. Barry falls to the floor, trying to warn Ashley, but dies before uttering a word.

The pasta is ready, Ashley walks to grab a strainer, she drops it when she sees the killer standing over Barry's body. Ashley cries out in horror, noticing he killed Liz too. She runs to the bedroom, locking herself in, she tries dialing 911 but panics when there's no dial tone. She pauses when hearing her name, confused by the familiar voice, “tre-trevor?” She says. The killer yells, “Ashley, I’m here to celebrate your anniversary,” he says. Paralyzed in fear, “why?! Why did you kill them!?” She says hysterically. 

All is silent, Ashley panting, “Trevor?” She says. The door bursts open, she sees the killer with his mask. He removes the mask revealing Trevor's face, sunken eyes with dark circles. “Am here now, to make it go away” he whispers. Ashley can see Trevor kept rubbing his head as if he had a bad migraine. Ashley’s heart drops, seeing him walking towards her. Trevor grabs her by the neck, he tightens his grip, causing her to fight for air. “With this knife, I've drawn out a better life, and I can give you that second chance,” he says. Ashley, unable to speak, knows that she is going to die like Barry and Liz. Ashley closes her eyes, accepting what comes next.

Santiago and Davis have done their research. The detectives know who their killer is, so they looked into the next possible victims. They knew Trevor would come for Ashley and Barry, Liz told them that Trevor went through a horrible breakup due to Ashley’s infidelity. The detectives exit the elevator leading to Ashley's apartment. They notice Liz dead, quickly drawing their weapons. The detectives enter the apartment, noticing Barry in a pool of blood, lying lifeless. Davis checks for a pulse, with his hand, gestures that Barry is gone.

Trevor sits his weight on Ashley with one hand choking her. He gestures as of drawing over Ashley with his knife, “now I finish my graphic novel” he says. Trevor, with the knife, raises his hand to kill Ashley. Trevor faces the doorway, he stops when he sees Santiago and Davis, with their guns drawn on him. He snickers, “detectives, you're here to finish my graphic novel,” he says. Santiago and Davis inch closer, “we got you, cameras got you, nowhere to run,” Davis says. 

Santiago could see Ashley looking seconds away from dying, “if she dies, you have five murders, there’s no way out of this. Let us help you, Trevor” he says. “Help? I helped myself draw the life I always wanted… to draw what I see” Trevor says. Davis knows in his gut Trevor is going for the kill, “he's gonna do it, he's gonna kill her” Davis says. Santiago locks his eyes on Trevor, seeing that he is far gone. He gestures his head nodding no to Trevor, “don't do it, Trevor” he says. 

Trevor smiles in a chilling manner, “actually, call me Trent” he says. He goes for the kill, “no, no, no!” Santiago yells. Not having any other choice, The detectives load Trevor with bullets, causing Trevor to crash through a window behind him. Davis runs to Ashley, she gasps for air, coughing violently. “Are you ok?” He says, she nods her head, yes, holding her tender neck. Santiago checks to see where Trevor fell. Trevor lies dead, impaled by the sharp-edged front gate. Santiago looks back at his partner, “it’s over?” Davis says. Santiago replies, “death by comic book, the story ends”.



February 04, 2022 19:55

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

3 comments

JEYDELIN ARIAS
17:36 Mar 03, 2022

Where does this story takes place.

Reply

Jesus Nieves
19:01 Mar 03, 2022

Supposed to be nyc

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
John Dixon
21:01 Feb 08, 2022

Hello Jesus, would you mind if I read your story and post it on my YouTube channel? You get your credit for the story you wrote and I will put the link in the description for this page of yours. Here's one I just for from another writer. Please let me know if you're interested. https://youtu.be/ngnlagFIKcE

Reply

Show 0 replies
Reedsy | Default — Editors with Marker | 2024-05

Bring your publishing dreams to life

The world's best editors, designers, and marketers are on Reedsy. Come meet them.