Farewell For Now

Suitcase in hand, you head to the station. Your throat is tight and you don't feel that you can say a single word without your tears spilling over. In only minutes, you will be on your way out of town. You have been avoiding the inevitable, but your departure has been withheld far too long. Life has been getting more dangerous in the city with the fear of an invasion of foreign officers lingering in everybody's thoughts. Your parents have finally thought it best to send you to your grandmother. They had previously thought it best to keep you close by their sides, but they know that despite their fears and dread it will be what is best for you. Your arrival at the station is abrupt and calls you back to the present. You risk a glance over at your mother, who is misty-eyed and letting out soft sobs and whimpers. You then look for your father on the other side of you, but he is not there. How soon you had forgotten that he had been sent out to delay the enemy troops from infesting your city. You feel a sudden urge that you must stay with your mother. If you leave, she has no one left. You imagine her sitting at the little apartment table in the dark, alone. You stop and turn toward your mother. She looks over at you questioningly, but stops beside you and pulls you into her arms. Neither of you say a word, but you are surely both thinking it. What if this goodbye is permanent? The thought gnaws at your mind and you attempt to push it back into the shadows of your thoughts. The piercing whistle of the train forces you to break out of your mother's arms. She pushes you toward the train and waves you away. She turns and pulls and tissue out of her pocket, and you take that as your sign to board the train. The train lets out another sharp blow of its whistle before pulling out of the station. As you find your seat and store your luggage, you look out the window. You find your mother and see words forming on her lips as you begin your journey from home. You make out the words, I love you.

The trip passes quickly and there are moments when you are very much aware of what is truly happening, and others when you are oblivious to it all. It is as if you have are asleep, but entirely aware of everything. You close your eyes, and impossible as it may seem, you escape into the land of slumber.

A final trill from the train and you awaken from your sleep. You look out the window and see a small wooden station, perhaps haphazardly constructed. Many families are welcoming children and relatives with open arms and embracing loved ones, trapping them with kisses. You know you won't be so lucky. You clutch your suitcase and climb off the locomotive. You scan the crowded station and briefly imagine the people as grass waving in a sunny field. Someone calling your name snaps you back to attention. It is your mother's friend from years before. You have no living relatives outside of the city, so your mother supposed Natalie would be able to provide the safety in the countryside that your mother couldn't in the city. Though, your mother had warned you that Natalie had always been quite snappy and controlling. You find this quite believable as you watch the short, quite large woman make her way through the crowd. Her hair is gray, but you decide that it is not from age. She has quite a young face, though it looks as though she may frown a lot because of the lines around her mouth and between her eyebrows. She motions you toward a car that is parked just beyond the fence of the station. You begin to make your way toward the car and you load your suitcase in the back. Natalie sits herself down in the driver's seat and you take the passenger seat.

"That station is entirely dangerous!" Natalie continues by explaining, "They had to construct it quite quickly when the children began being sent over to the countryside."

You simply nod, but you don't say a word. The transition will take some time to getting used to and you fear that anything you say will cause your stay with Natalie to be less than desirable. Fortunately, she doesn't seem to mind your lack of conversation and she carries on eagerly. You begin to tune her out and stare at the fields of wheat and pastures of horses passing by. The place is so different from the city and you gape at the untamed mountains and rivers you see in the distance. Natalie pulls in next to a small house that may have been white at one point, but has become a grayish yellow over time. You get out of the vehicle and retrieve your suitcase from the trunk. Natalie guides you to the front steps and opens the front door. Six kids emerge from the hallway and look at you. You don't know whether to feel intimidated or humored. There are two little girls clutching dolls to their chests, they look like twins. There are also two older girls, they may be your age. The two boys look fairly awkward, one is quite large and the other quite small. You are introduced and shown to your room. It is a small bedroom, but practical. You would've had to share a room with the other children, but their older brother is also away on duty and you have been given his room. You open the closet and see some shirts and pants tucked into the shelving that has been assembled in the closet. You unpack and hang up your clothes. You also take out a sea shell you had gotten when you took your trip to the ocean a couple years ago. You place the shell on your nightstand and consider laying down after your long journey. You feel like exploring instead though. You tell Natalie what you are doing and you walk out of the house.

There is a field beside their house and you walk through it to get to a small little forest of trees on the other side of the blowing grasses. When you get to the trees you hear the sound of trickling water and you make your way down a little hill. A creek is flowing through the trees and grasses and you sit down beside it. You close your eyes and relax to the sound of running water. Suddenly, you hear a rustling coming from behind you and you turn in fright. A small deer emerges from the trees and begins eating the grass. Obviously, the doe hasn't noticed you yet. You admire her sleek, velvety body and twitching, white tail. You adjust your sitting position to get a better look, but the deer snaps up its head and looks at you. You suck in your breath and she bounds off. You can hear her making little huffing sounds, almost like a whistle of a train that has lost its "toot". This reminds you of your journey all over again and you look down at your hands. You close your eyes again and sink into a swaying rhythm as you listen to the cool water tumble over the rocks and sand. You open your eyes and the sun is sinking behind the tall peaks of the mountains. You feel the last warmth of the day wash over you and as the sun disappears behind the mountains, you imagine all your troubles fading with the sun.