SEEING THE SUNSHINE THROUGH THE STORM

SEEING THE SUNSHINE THROUGH THE STORM

On a warm summer’s morning I was pleasantly woken up by the refreshing sprinkle of water from the ocean and a light kiss on my forehead from the sun that was just starting to rise.

It was my 18^th birthday week so when asked what I wanted for my birthday I naturally asked my parents to take me to my favourite place, the beach. The night before   was beautiful, spent with my family, who brought in my birthday with a delicious tiramisu  cake and barbeque. The night turned to morning and everyone retired around 3am. I don’t know if it was the extreme heat, or the excitement but I was unable to sleep and decided to go for a walk on the beach. My sister also could not fall off to sleep so she decided to join me. We enjoyed walking bare-feet in the sand, as it was now cool enough to walk on compared to earlier that day. We walked as far as we could, lamenting about our childhood memories of years gone by and family holidays that would never return. I don’t know what time it was but I remember my sister still talking to me when I dozed off only to wake the next morning.

I woke up to a postcard like image with the ocean glistening like diamonds from the sun’s reflection. The ocean and sun seemed to be one, separating as the sun rose higher and higher.  I watched in awe as the sun changed from red to orange to yellow and then a brilliant white, I watched till I could no longer look at it directly. My sister was still asleep, but I did not want to wake her up for selfish reasons of course, (my sister is one of those people that only keeps quite when she sleeps). I knew that if I woke her up, I would probably miss this, the most picturesque sunrise that I had ever seen. The morning was pleasant and all I wanted to do was lie there on the sand and take it all in. Being from the inland, it was rare for us to have moments like this, hence the love for the sea. 

I couldn’t have asked for a better birthday present than this. I felt like I was being blessed by the Sun God who gave me my first kiss, the God of the Ocean who blessed me with the gift of fresh water and the life giving God who allowed me to breathe in fresh air. I threw back my head, arms wide open and ran towards the ocean as if trying to grab as much of the sun between my hands as possible. I fell face front into the water, then rolled onto my back and lay there waiting for the waves to go back and wash over me again and again. I felt like I was five years old, holding my breath everytime the water washed over me and giggling as it went back into the ocean. I must have lay there for hours, enjoying every moment of that day.

By now my sister and parents were frolicking in the water too, the happiness I felt surpassed any number of Louis Vitton or Gucci gift that I could have received. Gifts disintegrate or are forgotten in some cupboard, but memories last forever. I am overwhelmed with emotion whenever I think of my 18^th birthday by the sea. The next few days were followed by evening walks on the beach, meals on the loft and hours in the water. My heart was heavy when I left but vowed to come back soon.

On our way back home, we were involved in a gruesome accident that left me in a wheelchair. Life was never the same. Everyone else had minor injuries and my dad was swimming in guilt, apologising everyday for my condition. I learnt to live with my disability. In the beginning I was depressed and bitter as I was about to leave for University when we got home after my birthday, but that didn’t happen. I was hospitalised for 3 months after the accident with the doctors attempting surgery on my spine and legs to get me walk. After the 7^th surgery I refused to have any more operations. I accepted the fact that I would be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. Although I could not go to the University of my choice, I was able to attend a local University and qualify with a Bachelor of Laws Degree (cum laude) in record time, I may add and have a very successful career as a Human Rights lawyer. I threw myself into my career and studies and obtained a Doctorate in Law by the time I was 28, just 10 years after that horrific accident.

My parents were so proud of me that they wanted to do something special for me. They were in the middle of planning a graduation party, when I crashed their planning and asked if we could go to the beach instead. In the ten years since the accident nobody in my family had been back to the beach. I was in the next room, when I overheard my parents arguing about whether we should go considering all the bad memories connected with our last trip. I interrupted them saying it was all I wanted, I was not ready to face a bunch of people who would be dancing at my party, when I wasn’t able to. That settled it. The following week we were road tripping to the beach once again.

Everyone was quiet throughout the 4 hour trip, not knowing what memories would be evoked. I looked out of the window most of the time, sometimes excited, sometimes sad, unable to understand  how I was feeling. We arrived at our luxurious bungalow around lunch time, we ate and retired to our rooms. I obviously had the biggest room to manoeuvre my wheelchair in, but it also had the biggest balcony with the best view of the ocean. When I woke from my afternoon siesta, the sun was beginning to set. I skilfully moved my wheelchair from my room onto the balcony where I sat watching the sunset. The sun went from a brilliant yellow to bright red and eventually disappeared behind the hills. I must have fallen off to sleep while watching the sun go down.

When I woke I found someone had covered me with a light blanket, too light to keep the morning breeze at bay, nevertheless it helped. Sitting on the balcony I could see the sun rise up from behind the ocean like it had on my 18^th birthday, only this time, instead of running into the ocean I was sitting in a wheelchair on the balcony. How much had changed in 10 years I thought. How I wish I could turn back the hands of time and have things the way they were.

I believe that God had heard my wish that day and sent an angel to my rescue. The man in the bungalow next to us happened to be a neurosurgeon and we got to chatting about how I ended up in the wheelchair. It so happened that he specialised in cases like mine and asked if I would be willing to give him a chance. After 10 years I was willing to try one more operation, but I wasn’t expecting too much, after all everything else had failed.  Fast forward a month, my operation was successful and I was on the road to recovery.

In those ten years I faced heartache, depression, anger and sometimes emotions that I could not explain. Physically and emotionally I was drained. While I was going through those difficult years, I hadn’t realised how much I had grown. Sometimes we need to experience the storms to appreciate the sunshine.