This is All my Fault

“This is all my fault,” She smiled looking directly at me, her eyes bright red. “What do you mean-” I cut myself off as I felt a sharp pain in my stomach. My forehead started sweating, a cold sweat. My throat became dry, I gasped for breath. Dizziness overwhelmed me. I slowly looked down a knife was lunged into my stomach, “Wha-at,” I cringed, “Why sister?” My vision went black.

~*~Two Days Earlier~*~

“Momma!” My 12-year-old sister called. Mom stuck her head through the archway connecting the kitchen and hallway that led to everywhere else. “Yes, Miel?” Mom replied. 

“What's for dinner?” Miel replied with her big brown eyes. Momma’s eyes smiled, “What would you like to eat, honey?”

“Spaghetti!” She said with a mysterious look.

“Oh!” I exclaimed excitedly, “Can we Momma?”

Momma looked at both of us, “Sure, why not? It was dad’s favorite anyway.” Miel's eyes turned angry, “I don’t want it because of that,” She snapped. Mom steps back and apologizes, “I am sorry, Miel I didn’t mean that…” Miel’s eyes soften up like she turned a switch. She walks away, “I will add the parmesan cheese.” Momma walked back to the laundry and I walked to my bedroom, the brown walls with leaf decor emerged. I took a deep breath of crisp air, my window was wide open.

Miel came into my room smiling, her eyes glistening as if she had a secret she didn’t want anyone to know, “Hurry, dinner is ready.”

“O-oh okay. I’m coming.” I followed her out of my room. Momma was already sitting down. I sat next to her, she looked tired. “Who wants parmesan on their spaghetti?” Miel asked, her eyes shining.

“Uh, no thank you,” I replied still looking at Momma.

“You sure?” She asked curiously.

“I’ll take some.” Momma pipped in. Miel looked at me and Momma, “Oh, okay. I’ll be right back.” Sister skipped into the kitchen. She came back with 3 plates of spaghetti, 2 of which had parmesan. She handed me the plate without it and gave herself and Momma the other one.

“Hope you enjoy it,” She said smiling, looking at me and Momma.

“Thank you, Honey!”

“Thank you, sister.”

All of us dug in, “This is amazing,” I said with my mouth full. “You did a wonderful job Miel,” Momma commented. Miel nodded not looking at us. After a few moments of silence, Momma asked, “Anything fun happen today girls?”

“I got an A on my math test,” I replied.

“Oh, that’s wonderful Caterpillar!” Momma’s eyes smiled at me.

“Thank you,” I said feeling proud.

“You, Miel?” Momma asked turning her attention to Sister. She didn’t reply, “Miel?” Miel looked up, her brown eyes showing no interest. She went back to eating her food.

After dinner was over, Sister went outside. I helped Momma clean up the mess from dinner. 

“Momma, I miss dad,” I said after a few moments of silence. Momma looked at me, her eyes started filling up with tears. She hugged me tightly, and the warmth of her body engulfed me. She was shaking, “Cate, I do too…” Warm tears fell down my cheeks, “W-why did he have to die,” I hiccuped, tears streaming down my face, faster now. Momma hugged me tighter, “It’s okay, sweetheart. Let it all out,” Momma whispered. I gasped for breath. Momma let go of me and lead me to the chair. 

Thousands of thoughts flew threw my head, Why did he have to die from tuberculosis? Why couldn’t he get help? Why? Why? Why? 

~*~Past~*~

The last memory I had of my dad… He was in his bed. He covered each cough with a tissue, each tissue had a bit of blood in it. He had been getting weaker every day. I walked into his room, his head rested on his pillow and he whispered, “Hi, little caterpillar.” 

I smiled, “Hi, Dad.” He nodded, his eyes opening and closing slowly, “I don’t think I have much more time,” He breathed shakily. I ran over to him, hugging him. “Be careful Caterpillar, I do not want you to get sick.”

“I know, but I don’t care,” I whimpered.

“Caterpillar…” Dad’s eyes watered, “I love you, I love all of you guys. Tell Miel that for me, okay?”

“Okay and I love you too,” I smiled.

“Goodbye, family,” Dad closed his eyes. His breathing slowly stopped.

“Goodbye, Dad,” I walked out of the hospital room, keeping my composure. The moment my foot stepped out, I collapsed falling down, sobbing. Mom walked out soon after. She kneeled on the ground and hugged me. I looked up at her, she was crying as she held onto me.

Moments later Miel ran towards us her bright eyes widened, “How is Dad?” I started crying again, she looked back and forth at us. A glaze came across her eyes, almost looked like her soul vanished. She walked away, not saying a word.

In the following weeks after my father's death, Miel started acting weird. Slowly, she became more violent. Lashing out over everything. We didn’t know what had happened.

~*~Present Time~*~

I snapped out of zoning out, Momma was still zoned out in her thoughts. Suddenly I see her snap out of it. She then stood up and started falling over, “Momma?!” I asked very concernedly. “I’m fine, just got kind of dizzy and I have a headache,” She held her head to her hand. Still concerned I helped her up, “Momma, let’s lead you to bed,” I held out my hand and she grabbed on. I walked her upstairs and got her situated. The clock read 10:36 p.m.. I kissed Momma goodnight and went into my room. 

I walked to my room dragging my feet forward. I misted a handful of my plants in my small room. I took off my outfit and changed into my favorite lilac nightgown, my dad bought it for me 2 sizes too big before he died. It fitted me perfectly now. I then crawled into my bed, and the soft fluff of my green blanket covered me. I pulled my stuffed cream bunny towards my body and turned over until I was laying on my side. I closed my eyes

The next morning I woke up, and my clock read, 10:00 a.m.. “What? Why didn’t anyone wake me up!” I jumped out of my bed and threw on the first outfit I saw. I ran into Miel’s room she wasn’t in her room.

I walked out into the kitchen. Miel was there making something, “What are you making, Sister.”

She jumped. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” I apologized.

“I’m cooking,” She wouldn’t look at me.

“Oh, okay-” I walked away as an uneasy feeling overwhelmed me. I wandered off toward Momma’s room. She was laying in bed breathing heavily. “Momma..?” I asked, worried. She slowly opened her eyes, “Hey, Caterpillar,” She replied weakly.

“Momma, what's wrong?” I asked panic filling me.

“I’m sure it's nothing… I must have caught a cold, I’m tired…” She closed her eyes. I went up to her and kissed her on the forehead. I walked out just as Sister was walking in, “Momma,” I heard her gently shake her up. “I made you breakfast.” Momma raises her head and eats a few pieces, “Thank you, Honey,” she muttered.

~*~Later That Night~*~

“Momma?” I asked walking into her room, “Are you okay?” I walked up to her and reached out to her hand, her palms were clammy, “Momma?” I looked for her face, her lips were blue. “Momma!” I shook her, her breathing was irregular. “Momma…” Warm tears fell down my face. 

I ran into the kitchen to go for the phone. Sister blocked the phone, her eyes red. “S-sister?” I asked ignoring the fear building up in me, “Let me get to the phone,” I demanded. “Why?” She asked her voice light as if she was teasing me. “Momma needs help, right now,” I sternly replied. “I don’t think so. Anyways, she will be dead in a bit.”

“Wha-at?!” I screamed at her, “What did you do?! What did you do?!” I repeated getting louder with every word. Hatred filled me.

“What do you mean?” Sister asked smiling.

“What did you do to Momma,” I said again pronouncing every word strongly.

“Ah, nothing much, I just added cyanide to her meals.”

“How, where did you even find that and why would you do such a thing?!” I cried, my anger melted into intense sadness and horror.

“One question at a time, jeez,” Sister said, mocking me.

“Why would you poison Momma?” I asked shaking.

“Isn’t obvious?” She asked smiling.

“What do you mean?”

“I never even got to say goodbye to Dad. I attempted to summon him back, but, instead, I summoned something else… I made a deal with them.” Her eyes glowed red.

I thought back to it, she had always been closer to Dad, more than anyone else.

“This is all my fault,” She smiled looking directly at me, with bright red eyes.

This story was meant to be published like two weeks ago, took me too long to finish I'm sorry-