Saved For Him

Aakesh’s Journal Notes

Two months after the final wave

Biochemical Warfare has decimated most populations of the world leaving behind a mix of abundant forests, mutated creatures, and humans.

The Long-legged Yellow Sac Spider, otherwise known as the Cheiracanthium mildei, has reportedly overrun Tennessee, Kentucky, and Georgia. Usually the size of a small car, these arachnids are not only nocturnal, but have developed a venomous disease that causes its victims to adopt a hybrid zombie-arachnid form once infected from a bite wound. Victims of the disease are known to be attracted to the sweet-smelling nature of flowers or processed sugary foods. The infection transformation spanned anywhere from three to twenty hours.

Ming- Honeysuckles sting

June 17th 10:02am

East Brainerd, Chattanooga TN

The sour sap of regurgitated stomach acid and honeysuckles stung and clogged Ming’s throat until he could barely breathe. It felt like he was huffing an addictive perfume and mildew at the same time. Thankfully, the leaves and stems agitated his elongated tonsils, so he gagged up another wave of vomit.

He wished he could calm down, despite knowing he didn’t have long before forcing the vomit out wouldn’t work anymore. God, if only he hadn’t done this to begin with. Somewhere too deep inside to admit, Ming wished he’d died last night. Before things became more confusing than anyone could remember clearly. All he knew was that the camp had been destroyed, Aakesh was gone, and he needed to find Aakesh at all costs.

“Find another one while taking a piss?” Darshan said sternly.

“Shut up.” Ming gurgled, spitting out the last string of flowers. “We’re almost there.”

“Yeah? And you can hardly control yourself.” He pointed out.

Pulling away from the puddle, Ming rubbed the tears out of his eyes. They stained his palms a yellowish green. It didn’t help that the flowers stank like hell. Everything smelled, overwhelming his new instincts greatly.

Darshan noticed the stains, and he looked even more pissed.

“I thought the agreement was to find Aakesh, not babysit you while you become more infected.”

“I said, we’re almost there.”

It didn’t matter if Ming was infected and supposed to be killed within twenty four hours, the deal was that they’d find him together. At first, Aakesh’s scent had been drowned out by the intensity of plants, but after rounds of vomit, his sinuses burned and were worn out. Only one distinguishable scent lasted. Aakesh smelled intoxicatingly salty, like sickly cold sweat with a completely recognizable hint of Androgel. They were already deep in East Brainerd nearing Audubon Acres, near the cave exhibition site.

Ming- Yesterday

June 16th 12:18 pm

The Camp

East Brainerd, Chattanooga TN

The outdoor camp had been ambushed by another round of zombie hatchlings. Something must’ve attracted them considering it wasn’t the only one they fought that day, and Ming had his suspicions on Darshan. As a hunter, the greatest skill to have was silence. Emotionally, Darshan was everything but silent. So when he brought back enough food to last the camp for another two weeks and didn’t say a single word, Ming knew it was strange.

Even so, he lit the fire and warmed up a can of lentil soup, grabbing a couple of stale white crackers to soak up the broth. Aakesh had been sick for the last few days after his last exhibition, but Ming hoped getting him to eat would help.

At the main house, Aakesh was buried deep in the comforter with his eyes slightly opened.

“Morning sleepy head.” Ming laughed, “How are you doing?”

“Sleepy.” Aakesh groaned but smiled.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm.”

“I brought us something to eat.” Ming set down the bowls carefully and scooted onto the futon. Aakesh had positioned himself up to sit.

“Where’d you get this from?” He yawned.

“Darshan. He and the others ransacked a grocery store. Brought back a ton of shit.” Ming kept quiet about the creatures ambushing.

“Damn.” Aakesh nodded before saying, “I have something for you too then, I guess.”

“Oh?”

He pulled out a small velvet box from under his pillow.

“I wanted to wait until I wasn’t sick anymore, but I don’t know, I feel like this is the right time.”

Ming’s face warmed.

“I know weddings aren’t really a thing anymore, but would you marry me?”

The wedding band was black around the rims with shades of dark murky green and yellow in the middle.

Tears weren’t an easy thing to get out of Ming, but he was so stunned– so touched– he started crying and kissed Aakesh.

They both knew the answer was yes.

Ming- It hurt

June 17th 11:29am

East Brainerd, Chattanooga TN

Ming had always imagined being infected would hurt. As if he could feel the venomous parasite physically growing inside of him from the bandaged wounds. Instead, it changed his brain. It mellowed out the parts he wanted to keep and hold sacred. Still, sensations numbed and an animalistic spite came through. He felt lost and no one was there for him.

Darshan, being a condescending bitch, insisted on Ming walking in front of him. He justified it as a “safety precaution” because miniature horns had already sprouted from Ming’s cheeks. In fact, what was stopping him from killing Darshan besides Aakesh’s disapproval? He could just have lied, saying that Darshan died in the fire with the destruction of the attack.

Ming focused again, gripping around the newly formed horns appearing on his knuckles. Is this what being infected was like? A slow-burn seep into murder and lies?

Suddenly, a sound crept up Ming’s spine, it sounded like a glass bottle being shattered against the street. It forced him to an abrupt stop. Hatchlings were nearby. He couldn’t discern the direction they were coming from, but he could practically feel their presence.

The gun nestled in Darshan’s harness was so close yet so far from reach. But rather than pointing it in the direction of the noise, Darshan pointed it at Ming.

“Why’d you stop?”

“Did you hear that?”

“No. Whatever you’re talking about, no. You’re lucky I’m letting you live.”

More like, Darshan’s lucky Ming was letting him live. The unspoken barrier between them kept Ming wordless. However, what he couldn’t tell was who was going to die first.

“How much longer do we have?” Darshan sighed as if it were his fault for not responding.

“We’re here.” Ming faced a tall brick house on the path.

Was becoming a creature about his own yearning to kill, or about absorbing the blood lust of others?

Aakesh’s scent grew stronger by the second.

Ming had a choice to make.

Aakesh- Panic

June 16th 9:41pm

East Brainerd, Chattanooga TN

Waking back up from a Tylenol nap was a lot more difficult than Aakesh wanted. His neck and back ached, but the dizziness slowly steadied as he opened his eyes.

Dreams- nightmares really- had plagued his mind ever since the last exhibition. Robbie, one of the more shy explorers who specialized in hymenoptera, hadn’t made it back alive.

Aakesh shuttered and gnashed his teeth together, tightening as the strain distracted him from his own thoughts. He hadn’t loved Robbie romantically, but he valued him enough to call it love. Aakesh felt pride in his care for others even if it hurt him severely.

Ming should’ve been having dinner, so it was the right time to go downstairs. Aakesh couldn’t believe he had proposed to Ming while sick. Even so, nothing could make him feel ashamed of that moment.

Before heading downstairs, Aakesh made the bed. He routinely made the bed, no matter what. That’s when he heard it. A far away pulsing, scratching noise. Maybe one of the radios had been left on? Aakesh turned to the end of the hallway, down to Darshan’s room. Fiddling in his room wasn’t permitted but he simply didn’t care, family looked out for family. Nevertheless, Aakesh knew he couldn’t tell Ming that Darshan made a simple mistake like forgetting to turn off a radio. He knew that Ming hated Darshan- and for a good reason too.

Darshan's room was lit by the full moon peeking through an open window. Was the wind rubbing the window netting? Aakesh closed the window, however the noise continued.

He was transphobic, despite knowing both Aakesh and Ming were trans men. Truly, Aakesh believed that he was just trying to keep a strong and false morale, that deep inside he recognized them as transgender. While they didn’t see eye to eye, family looked out for family. So, staying with him in the biggest house on the campsite was not only a luxury, but an apology from Darshan. Aakesh knew Ming was too caught up in his hate to understand and couldn’t blame him for it.

Aakesh focused, scanning around one more time, paying close attention to the details he could make out. Dark silhouettes of weapons and duffel bags, a neat and orderly bed. Almost militaristic. Finally, he noticed a faint light coming from the rim of the closet. He opened the closet door fully to see a large silken egg sac. Spider eggs.

It resembled a large bundle of yellow gelatinous fish eggs so full they were going to burst. The noise was the spiders moving. They were going to hatch soon.

Panic and dread filled Aakesh’s lungs. Whatever on earth was going on between Darshan and the eggs in his closet had to be stopped, end of discussion.

Only managing to blink, a shadow lurked from outside the window. Aakesh shot his head back to see a massive horned spider staring right at him.

Ming- Dying For

June 17th 11:37am

East Brainerd, Chattanooga TN

Darshan stubbornly pushed past Ming as they entered the house from the broken side door. The home looked hollow and aged, except Ming saw more than interior. Glazed with shades of green and red, Ming felt how the shades interacted with each other. When he turned his head right, he heard Darshan’s stressed breathing. When he turned his head left, he heard what confirmed this was the right place to go.

“Stay here. In the doorway.” He commanded without turning back. Darshan hadn’t put down his gun yet. Ming suppressed a darkly amused yet horridly anxious smile, and waited as Darshan disappeared around the corner.

He almost pitied poor Darshan for so hastily walking into a death trap. Ming’s eyes, no longer useful, slid back into his skull so his senses could hone in. To make sure Darshan couldn’t make it out, Ming began to vomit again. This time his vomit strung from his mouth with an intentional gulping. Translucent white- almost silky- churned out from his gut and into his hands. Slimy and tasteless. He felt it intertwine between his fingers, the fibrous hairs were soft and warm, yet sticky. Really really sticky. The stickiness clogged his throat, choking him to the point of dying. Like he had been dying from the moment he pushed Aakesh away from the spider’s attack last night. As Aakesh ran away for his life.

What was once an evil transformed into a brotherhood. The spider that attacked him and destroyed his camp, his new brother in bond, was now gifting him the act of trapping Darshan to feed the brothers. With the only price being Ming’s faltering livelihood.

However, a mere whisper snagged Ming back to almost-human consciousness. The scent he knew and loved dearly was so close he could taste it. It smelled intoxicatingly salty, sickly like cold sweat with a completely irresistible hint of Androgel.

Blind terror filled Ming as he breathed again, gasping for air. His brain clenched as his eyes slid back into focus, and he yanked the rest of the silk out of his throat.

Aakesh was gaping at him from across the doorway.

Ming’s words caught in his throat, too ashamed to speak, but desperate tears dripped down his face as the two stood silently on each side of the door.

“Ming, is it really you?”

Ming nodded yes and relief coursed through his veins as the two embraced.

Aakesh’s eyes were tender yet strained from joy.

“I thought you had died for me. I felt so guilty.” He whispered. The weakness in his voice hurt more than the words themselves.

Gently Ming leaned in closer, forcing his throat to allow him to speak.

“I am dying for you,” He smiled, “And I don’t regret it anymore.”

“Why not? Can I die for you instead?” Aakesh squeezed his eyes shut to hold back tears.

Ming shook his head and kissed Aakesh sweetly. Then he pulled off his wedding band, and placed it in Aakesh’s palm.