Zmei Gorynich and Vasilisa the Wise: a fairy tale

Once upon a time there lived Zmei Gorynich — part man, part three-headed dragon—in a large castle overlooking green forests, lush valleys and a dozen villages he ruled. Well, “ruled” was a strong word. He just lived in a castle and flew around his land from time to time for some fresh air and exercise. He didn’t burn any villages, nor did he ever terrorize any village dwellers. But people’s fear of this man-dragon was so great that they spun endless tales of Zmei’s cruelty and ruthlessness. Zmei’s false reputation spread like wildfire and brought hoards of young princes, knights, and bohatyrs (strong warriors) along with it to Zmei’s castle walls. Each of them thought that he was going to be the one to slay the beast and take over his lands and possessions. 

At first Zmei was outraged. He would fly to the castle wall, breathe some fire in the intruder’s general direction and roar at them to go home. Of course, they wouldn’t listen. Instead, they would shout some nonsense along the lines of “I will slay you, oh foul beast! Prepare to die!” Then Zmei would gently push an intruder off the castle wall into the moat and go back inside. Most intruders lived to tell some mythical tales of Zmei’s disproportionate strength and cunning. Some drowned in the moat. Regardless of their fate, the outcome for Zmei was always the same —when the stand-off was over, he remained alone in the big castle. He felt misunderstood and unloved. 

Over time, Zmei flew over his land less and less. Until one day, he realized that he could no longer fly because his body became too heavy for his wings. 

Since the princes, knights, and bohatyrs couldn’t deliver the results and slay Zmei, the villagers resorted to sending him young virgins in an effort to appease him. The first virgin was very dull and overly superstitious. She came into the castle, prostrated herself in the middle of the throne hall, and started lamenting something incoherent repeatedly putting the cross sign over her upper body. Zmei watched for a while and then offered her some food. She started screaming even louder. Zmei had no choice but to shove her out of the gate. 

The second virgin was better. She came in and stated that she was in love with this one blacksmith, and her dad was against the union, and that she and the blacksmith were going to get married anyway because she was carrying his child. 

“Listen, your Formidableness,” said the virgin, “you seem like a cool guy. Are you ok with me just sneaking out of here? My boyfriend and I are going to get away from this land as far as possible. My dad can never know!” 

“That’s fine with me,” said Zmei, “but as you go, could you somehow spread the rumor in the villages that I don’t like virgins? Hell, you can even say that I don’t like women in general, or people…” 

“I’ll do what I can,” promised the virgin, grabbed some food in her travel pouch, and shipped out. 

The virgin worked her magic because Zmei was finally left alone. He could take a walk in his extensive castle gardens or sit on a balcony enjoying a cup of tea, or even take his human form and ride a horse in one of his vast pastures. Because you see, Zmei could turn into a human whenever he felt perfectly calm and balanced— it wasn’t very often but it did happen occasionally. And when he would get very lonely, he would turn into his human form and lurk among people: watching, observing, and learning about human interactions. 

And he lived relatively happily, in peace and quiet, until he didn’t. Because he met her —that notoriously cold-hearted, arrogant, red-headed, freckled, blue-eyed maiden whose smile warmed up the entire world, whose eyes healed the deepest emotional wounds, whose words were like refreshing mountain springs… that Vasilisa the Wise, the only daughter of a neighboring king. The king had a hell of a time marrying off his daughter because, as her name implies, she was very smart and very serious—two qualities that no respectable suitor of the 11th century Rus found attractive in a woman. But Vasilisa had a hefty title of a princess and huge tracts of land behind her name. So, such serious shortcomings as intelligence and composure were overlooked and a long line of suitors lined up her father’s throne hall. If only Vasilisa was willing to pick a suitor. But she wasn’t. She tormented them with witty riddles they couldn’t solve or impossible tasks they couldn’t complete. Nobody—including Vasilisa—knew what she was looking for but it definitely wasn’t it. 

Zmei watched her from afar, too scared to approach as a suitor or to strike up a conversation.  All he knew was that he wanted to see her again and again—to talk to her and look into her eyes. So he did what Zmei knew how to do best: he kidnapped Vasilisa and put her in the highest room of the tallest tower. He knew that method worked like a charm because it was exactly how his own father acquired the hand and (possibly) the heart of his mother. His father also kidnapped Zmei’s mother and held her hostage in the tower until she conceded to marry him. His parents even looked marginally happy and normal in their later years of marriage. 

But Zmei wasn’t his father. He wanted to impress Vasilisa. He wanted a chance to show her who he really was beneath the three heads and midnight-blue scales. He made the highest room in the tallest tower very comfortable, of course. He even picked some fresh wild flowers and put a stack of books in case she wanted to read. 

“What!? You’re just gonna put me into this prison cell in the tower? Just like that?” screamed furious Vasilisa when he gently deposited her body into the room. 

“I brought you some books and tonight I’m making a new recipe for pheasant pie. I’ll bring you some!” offered Zmei cautiously. 

“Even though you look like a dragon, you’re just a typical man—upholding the patriarchal hegemony believing that you can control and contain me!” screamed Vasilisa angrily and threw a book at one of Zmei’s heads. 

Even though she missed, Zmei scratched his head and looked at her in confusion. He had no idea what “patriarchal hegemony” was but he understood it was very important to Vasilisa. So he decided to look it up. 

When he brought her a slice of the pheasant pie, she was gone—escaped. 

In the year that followed he kidnapped her four more times. She never stayed for more than two or three days before escaping. Zmei could never figure out how she did it. But he saw that Vasilisa was reading the books he left for her in the room. One night Zmei crawled on top of the roof of the tallest tower to peek through Vasilisa’s window. She was standing by the window looking at the starry sky. 

“Do you see how close Mars and Saturn are?” asked Vasilisa, taking a notice of quiet Zmei. “I love to look at the stars and imagine how much I could see if I was as free.”

“Where did you learn about the stars?” inquired Zmei and moved closer to the window. 

“I told my dad that I was going to see a clairvoyant woman to help me identify the right husband but in reality I attended a couple of lectures by an astronomy professor who was visiting our local university,” said Vasilisa and looked at Zmei with a long unblinking gaze. “Listen, Zmei…”

“Call me Zyoma,” interrupted Zmei. “My mother called me Zyoma and I really like it. It’s not as intimidating as Zmei.” 

“Were you and your mom close?” asked Vasilisa softly, reaching out and placing her hand on Zmei’s shiny scales. 

“Yes, she was very nice to me, very kind. She was the only person who liked me,” he replied and looked away. 

“Listen, Zyoma,'' continued Vasilisa, “you can’t hide here all your life. You have to face your fear and fight for what you want.” 

“You mean…. people? I have to go to people?” asked Zmei trying to figure out what she meant. 

“And people, too. It was nice talking to you tonight. I’m going to sleep,” declared Vasilisa and started moving away from the window. 

“Wait, do you want me to bring more books for you?” offered Zmei. 

“Maybe next time,” said the maiden and blew out her only candle plunging the room in total darkness. 

The next morning she was gone. 

Two months later a word came that Vasilisa’s father was hosting another suitor line-up and this time he was serious about marrying off his daughter whether she was ready to pick a husband or not. Zmei knew this was his chance. No matter how scared and insecure he was about the possibility of rejection, he had to put himself out there and confess his love for her. He considered going in his human form and inspected himself in a large mirror—medium height, slightly bow-legged, red beard and soft brown thinning hair—in a word, not a looker. So he went as a dragon. 

When he arrived at Vasilisa’s castle, the throne hall was full of dazzling princes, young and old, and droves of various other important guests. When Zmei entered, everyone gasped in unison and huddled to the side of the room as if to give him more space. Some young warriors drew their swords, women shielded the kids behind their long dresses. 

Vasilisa and Zmei stood on the opposite sides of the throne hall looking into each other’s eyes, barely breathing with excitement and anticipation. 

“Vasilisa, I love you! I want to marry you! I want to spend my entire life with you! I want to join your fight in dismantling patriarchal hegemony!” declared Zmei in a trembling voice. 

Some visitors started chuckling and pointing their fingers at Zmei. But not Vasilisa. She was smiling with a warm smile, her eyes filled with tears. 

“You fat silly oaf! Finally, you said it!” said Vasilisa laughingly. “I love you too. I have, since the first time you tried kidnapping me. We’ll be married tonight! Common, I’ll show you this hill I picked for our wedding. The sunset view there is amazing!”

Vasilisa almost floated across the room to the spot where Zmei was standing, placed her hand on his left wing and led him outside. Zmei was so happy, he kept pinching himself to make sure he wasn’t sleeping. Zmei gently touched Vasilisa’s thick braid with his claw. 

“How did you escape the castle every time?” asked Zmei. 

“I made copies of all your keys. I could go in and out at will,” said Vasilisa with a smile. 

“Why did you let me kidnap you every time? Why did you choose to stay?”

“How else would we spend time together, Zyoma?” answered Vasilisa and looked at him slyly. 

“How can you, such an amazing woman, love ME, this strange anti-social man-dragon?” asked Zmei, very afraid of what the answer might be. 

“I love you because you’re kind and you’re willing to learn. You’re not afraid of a strong woman by your side. You’re not afraid of what others might think or say about you,” replied Vasilisa and gave him a gentle squeeze on one of his necks.

And just like that, Zmei and Vasilisa married and had six children whom they adored. And they lived happily ever after and enjoyed each other’s company in those rare moments alone when their six kids weren’t driving them nuts. 

The End