BEN
They got out as early as possible, before the first light and by the first light they had covered almost two kilometers deep into the forest and hunting. Ben had a good shot with an arrow, at twenty three a good farmer and father of two, a bow and arrow weren't tools he should have been using always but he loved them and had loved and dreamt of the opportunity he was enrolled into the Sungu-sungu but missed it. Ben always practiced archery in his farm with a sense urgency in it and was good at it.
Deep in the dry forest in the dry season at the river Njoro, the best place to find game. He hid under a bush, thick and hot with Kevin besides him who had knocked his arrow already touching his light skinned chin where a beard should have grown -nothing did despite being older than Ben-, Kevin noticed he was watching and blushed, he always does when it comes to archery and beards.
"Aren't you?" Kevin asked.
"After you" he replied.
"I thought it’s a competition" said Kevin with a look of disappointment on his face, he liked competing.
"Yes it is, but we can't do it at once".
He turned to his pray, aimed and shoots. Nothing. The bush was just besides the river which was dry and low and the gazelles had to get into the muddy banks for access, three paces away from where they hid. The miss made Ben laugh a hard laugh that stirred the preys more and within seconds they were alone.
"We could have done it together, now we have to wait for the gazelles to return" said Kevin, his face red and eyes wet.
"You have missed your chance, it is now mine".
KEVIN
They waited almost half an hour before the river banks began being filled with gazelles and other minors. Kevin looked towards Ben who was talking fun of him all this time after missing, his long black beard coconut-oiled to reflect the rising sun. Ben was broad-shouldered more dark skinned and young unlike Kevin who was lean and tall, Kevin was trained with the Sungu-sungu for over nine years, the time when Ben was still suckling his mother’s tits and now the fool was making fun of him. Kevin had almost everything over Ben, twice the number of children with the fool's twin sister. He liked him but today he aroused his anger.
"Do it now" said Kevin.
"Now? I need the fat ones I want you to carry a large meat-sac" he had been lying on the ground looking up but Kevin's command had made him change position and now was studying the river bank.
"The one in the far east is as fat as your wife and light skinned as you" said Ben with a low voice, "a good meal for my sons".
"Don't bring my wife into this".
"She is my sister". He knocked and aimed. Kevin prayed he would miss, the jokes would be more and he hated fighting with Ben.
Breathe. Kevin held his. In the growing heat you could see the pain in Ben's eyes as he aimed.
"Shoot".
"Shshsh, keep your mouth shut I need to hit the eyes". Said Ben, his hands still.
When Ben released the fat gazelle was left alone on the river bank, with a wooden protrusion where its right eyes could have been. Even Kevin applauded.
He went to the dead animal and carried it to the shade to find Ben chewing tobacco, the gazelle was heavy almost his weight's size but Ben didn't move a finger. He skinned the animal, Ben didn't move a finger, and he divided it into three potions but no assistance from Ben. The last time he had won the game of hunting Kevin had gone against the rules and helped Ben, he regretted.
MOSES.
Moses watched everything, the tall man was tired of carrying the two luggage of meat while the other one was smoking a pipe and eating a stake. Moses hoped they would be living for home now; he had tracked and followed them ever since they saw their tracks with Loishie his group leader. Moses being the fastest and noiseless in the group was chosen for the task and following them he did.
Moses was armed with a spear, small sword and a long knife. Dressed well in the Masai tradition but if you knew the Masai well you would see he missed some of the important facial markings but that was easily over looked. Moses was Masai, he just wasn't the traditional type and he liked this job because he enacted what he was taught -the ways of the Moran-.
He followed, a good distance not to be recognized.
They rested and the lean man started preparing for fire, and then he took a small meat from the small sack he had been carrying. They looked intended to finish the meat before they arrived to the village they were heading to. Moses found himself a good tree which he climbed and watched the two brothers in a shade.
Two? Now there was one, where was the lean slave? Had he gone to look for dry wood? But he had done that already. He moved his right hand towards his sword and fetched his spear that was arms-length beside him, his heartbeat increasing.
"Get down and leave everything up there" somebody called from below; startled he looked and saw the lean man with a well-placed arrow aiming at him.
"Jump down" he said. He did. How did the slave find him? He got down leaving his spear and sword up the tree, the lean man didn't see his long knife and for that Moses was relieved, he might be a fool after-all.
"How long have you been following us Moran?" The man asked. He looked back but was shooed forward with the arrow, it wasn't poisoned but it was well made with a good iron-made arrowhead, fatal. It kept Moses in line.
What would Loishie and the others think? So easily caught with men all the others had thought fools.
BEN
Ben saw Kevin coming with the Masai, well dressed in the Masai red and blue attires that covered well his black lean body, he looked too young with his round beardless face with long red-painted hairs, a Moran yes but he had a different look on him, a less dangerous look but Kevin looked over reacted with his arrow well placed to be released with fatal outcome. Ben stood and drew his sword, more of a decoration than tool.
"I told you we were being followed" said Kevin, who sounded victorious.
"By a boy" said Ben.
"This is a Moran, Ben not a boy".
"He looks sixteen" said Ben.
"They are trained young, and he is not sixteen" said Kevin, growing red again.
Ben got quite, he had angered his friend too much he decided to let that pass but the Masai looked too young with a shy face that couldn't look towards Ben's eyes and with signs of tear on his face.
"What do you want to do with him?" Ben asked.
"He will lead us to his fellows or taste my sword" he said that lowering his arrow and heading to where he left his sword, to Kevin the sword had been used before and against Masai. He then held the boy at sword point and pressing it hard on his neck.
"You will speak now" said Kevin. The boy didn't, he looked afraid and turned to Ben. He felt the fear in the boy’s face. Ben had to play smart, Kevin would want to make a big deal of the event and trick-out of carrying their winnings.
"I don't think he understands".
The boy steered. Kevin hit him hard on the face with the sword handle right beside his left eye, it bled. Ben run and wrestled the armed man to the ground and used his strength to pin him there.
"Run boy" he said heavily breathing, the boy didn't.
"What are you doing Ben?" groaned Kevin, Ben lessened the grip on Kevin's neck. "You are risking us, he is armed"
The Masai was nowhere to be seen.
"Get the meat we are leaving". He stood leaving Kevin on the ground.
Ben was hit with something hard from behind, turning with agony he found himself on sword point and tears on Kevin's face.
"Hey Kevin, he was just a boy".
KEVIN
Hey Kevin, he was just a boy. The words run in his head as he attacked, Ben wasn't prepared but was faster than his heavy body promised and within seconds they were all armed and sword-fighting, Kevin knew Ben couldn't handle his speed and movements and within seconds the young-big man was all sweating and wide eyed, the anger in Kevin's face must have triggered it. He was determined to teach the young man a lesson, tired of being trashed.
The movements got weaker and his opponent's fate was on Kevin's sword point. Energy increased he sparred Ben's sword away, he fell together with his sword and prepared his head for judgment from his superior. He waited.
"Won't you do it?" he heard a cry. More of a pledge that after an eternity it had brought Kevin back to his senses.
"Do what".
"Kill me". Kevin threw his sword down. A fatal mistake.
MOSES
Moses had escaped and brought the others who had been following them, they had spent the last half a minute watching the two friends sword fighting, they were the best sword men he had seen in recent time even Loishie had appreciated and had ordered them to wait for the conclusion of their fighting before they attacked, after the finest display Moses's savior surrendered and by the look of the lean-man's face they all had thought he would kill him. He didn't and Loishie ordered they surround them just after the lean-man let his sword fall.
"Stand-up" bellowed Loishie. The only man down did. His face changed a new set of emotion different from the lean man. Moses smiled.
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2 comments
I was assigned to critique this story, Steven, and I have to say I think you should have let someone read it and offer suggestions for grammar, punctuation and spelling before you submitted it. You gave yourself a very hard task with three male characters, and in spite of their differences, it's difficult for the reader to keep up with who is speaking, since there are so many third person pronouns -- he/him/his -- which makes it confusing. "The boy steered," is probably supposed to be the boy sneered (I'm guessing). Is 'knocked' his arrow su...
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Thanks for the comment
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