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Christian Christmas Funny

The Merry Bird

There once was a young man named Bruce, that had just moved out on his own. He wanted to have the best Christmas ever. He dreamed about it all year. Having all his family and friends, lots of food and of course lots of presents. He wanted to have such a great Christmas this year, that he went out of his way to make sure that he was gonna have a great Christmas. He bought lights to cover his house and decorated his yard with different ornaments. He was so busy decorating and cleaning up his house to be ready for Christmas, that he was forgetting one small detail, "his Christmas list". But he wasn't really worried for he thought he had everything he needed. So when Christmas Eve came, his family and friends started showing up one by one. Where's your bestie Denise? Someone asked. Oh she couldn't make it with school and work. It would've been nice to see her again after two years. But our schedules are not allowing it, even our phone calls been shortened to "just when we have time". But hey it's all good, we're here and it's the holidays so let's not be blue but be Merry. It was Christmas morning all the kids got up early, waking up all the adults. Bruce stood back at a distance watching everyone open their gifts. A little kid came up to him and asked why he wasn't opening up presents. Did you get on Santa's naughty list? The kid asked. Bruce said oh no I didn't ask for nothing. You all being here and seeing you all happy is my present. After all the fun and excitement was over and everyone had left. Bruce watched from his porch at all the snow and seeing the last car leave. It sure is quiet now, He thought to himself. As he went back inside he heard a voice calling him "Bruce, Bruce". Who's there? "he said". just me and you now, just me and you. So he went towards the voice it was coming from his study. As he entered the room he saw a birdcage with a bird in it talking to him, with a note attached to it. The note read.

To Bruce.

"For you to remember me, on the days you're not with me".

Hmm he thought, I wonder who gave me this? There's no name on it besides mine. I'm hungry, I'm hungry, said the bird. Well this should be fun, I don't even know how to take care of a bird. He went and got a few crackers and a tiny bowl of water. Brought the bird into the living room. I guess birds like water and crackers, that's what I've heard on t.v. anyways. As they were sitting there Bruce started talking to the bird. He told him well if you're gonna be staying awhile we'll have to give you a name. Squawk, whatever makes you happy squawk ". So Bruce thought for a few seconds "I got it". That was quick squawk, said the bird. It's been a Merry Christmas so I'll name you Merry. Do you like that name? Bruce asked. It'll do squawk, it'll do. So I don't know much about birds, so you'll have to help me out what you like. Squawk!! Amateur squawk. Would you be quiet please so I can research you? Squawk! Ok do what you got to do squawk! As Bruce sits down at his desk. He turns on the computer, and types in talking bird. As the computer screen starts showing different species of talking birds, Bruce looks at Merry and says well this was easy enough if only I could search who gave you to me. So you won't get lonely squawk!, so you won't get lonely. Whatever, Bruce said. Okay this shows you're a Indian Ringneck Parakeet also called Rose-Ringed Parakeet. You're known as Holy and likes to pray, that's pretty cool me being a Christian. Christian? Thought you was human squawk! Bruce gives a little chuckle while shaking his head. Yes I'm human, Christian is a religious belief that I practice. If you say so squawk! If you say so. Well I guess we both got a lot to learn about each other, so we'll have fun in the mean time. Well let's move you to the living room so we can watch some t.v. sounds good squawk sounds good. As they sit there and watch Bruce's favorite show they sat there and bonded. Really getting to know each other and talking their heads off. Several months pass and Bruce and Merry are closer than ever inseparable even. Bruce takes Merry with him every where he goes just talking all the time. As they were walking downtown one day a friend approached him. Hey Bruce how are you doing? I see you still have Merry with you. Oh yeah, we're real close now like one. That's good, did you ever find out who sent it to you? No I didn't said Bruce kinda forgot someone gave her to me since we bonded so much. Well I guess it doesn't matter who gave it to you now huh? Long as you're both happy that's all that matters. You're right it doesn't matter as long as we have each other. Plus I've learned a lot of cool things about her she's really unique. Well that's good nice seeing you again. Yes, nice seeing you too. Well later that day, they went home, and there was a letter waiting for him, but no return address or nothing just his name. Who's it from squawk! Who's it from? I don't know Merry let's go inside and read it. As he opened the letter and started to read aloud. It read "I'm coming for Christmas maybe longer. He was still confused on who sent it still no name on the letter but his own was on the whole letter. This is just too weird first you last year from unknown person, and now this letter close to Christmas. But we're not having a Christmas party this year squawk! Hmm? Bruce thought who could it be, oh well he thought. Let's just put this up and watch some t.v. and relax. Sounds good to me squawk! sounds good. As people were all getting ready for Christmas with their families Bruce started feeling sad. What's wrong Bruce? squawk! what's wrong? Tell Merry all about it squawk! Well Merry since you must know this will be the first Christmas alone, no family or friends over this year. Liar squawk! Liar Merry said. How am I lying? asked Bruce. You have Merry squawk! You have Merry. Bruce let's off a little chuckle you're right Merry I do have you and I guess our mysterious guest that's suppose to be here. Few weeks pass and now it's Christmas Eve. Bruce and Merry forgetting all about the mysterious letter and the unknown guest. Bruce and Merry decorated their house Merry hanging lights and other light Christmas decor that's high up. Bruce hanging the more heavy and ground Christmas decorations. As they finish up with the decorations Bruce says well we're all done now shall we watch some t.v. before turning in. Yes please squawk! Yes. As they sit there on the couch they both fall asleep. Early in the morning they are awakened by a loud knock on the door. Someone's here squawk! Someone's here. But when Bruce opens the door there's no one there as he goes to close the door he hears Merry Christmas squawk! Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas to you too Merry. That wasn't me squawk! Wasn't me. You the only one hear that squawks. I'm right here squawk! Bruce turns around and looks down there's another bird just like Merry but this was a boy. So am I getting one of you each year or something? Bruce started laughing saying so you're the mysterious guest huh? I bet you wrote the letter too as he laughs out loud. No actually I did a voice said from the porch. It couldn't be Bruce said to himself, turning his head towards the voice. Oh my God I can't believe it. Yes it's me you can breathe now. Oh my God, Denise! Denise! You're really here, you are really here while he's picking her up and hugging her tightly. Oh I missed you so much. I missed you too Bruce that's why I sent the bird to you last year. That was you? I didn't even know. Yeah I wanted to keep you in suspense . Well you did a good job I was clueless. I knew squawk! I knew Merry said. You knew this whole time who gave you to me? Bruce asked. How come you never told me Merry? You never asked me squawk! Never asked. Ok you got me there. So you named her Merry huh? Denise asked. Yeah I thought it matched her being a Christmas gift. That's so cool I named mine Chris. Wow Chris and Merry what a pair. Guess great minds think alike Denise said. Yeah well come in out of the cold and get warm I'll make some hot cocoa for us. As they sit there catching up and reminiscing on old days, the birds talking to each other with the snow falling beautifully outside. It's real nice to spend time with you again Denise especially for the holidays! Same here Bruce, I feel the same way. Wish we could do this all the time Denise said. What, Christmas? Asked Bruce. No this, "us" together all the time said Denise. Oh, says Bruce well I got the perfect gift for you wait here. You got me a gift on such short notice? Denise asked. Actually I've had it just waiting for the perfect time to give it to you Bruce said. As he comes out the back room, Bruce says, ok close your eyes. Okay Denise said. She's standing by the window as Bruce approaches her. Okay you can open your eyes now. As she opens her eyes to see what Bruce got her. He was down on one knee holding out a ring. Will you marry me Denise? Her eyes tear up as she nods her head yes, YES! YES I will Denise replied! He slips the ring on her finger as he stands up to kiss and hug her oh so tightly. Well it is a Merry Christmas after squawk! Merry Christmas!

December 24, 2020 19:47

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1 comment

Zahra Daya
04:35 Jan 01, 2021

Hi Brandon! Good job on your first submission - I got very festive vibes while reading! Make sure you just check up on your grammar and correct that. Apart from that, it was great! P.S. If you could check out my work and comment, I would appreciate it! Good job!

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