Bat Mitzvah on Cloud Nine

Today was the day Ruby had been anticipating for the past 364 days, Ruby’s Bat Mitzvah. Ruby turned thirteen four days ago, but today was her party. Of course, she was excited, I mean her entire class was coming, including Lucas. Lucas was Ruby’s crush, and at this point in her life, he was the most important person. Anything Ruby did, she asked herself, Would Lucas think I was weird if I did this? Or ugly? Or stupid?  

Everything had to be perfect. Not only for Lucas, but for Papa. Ruby and her ‘Papa’ have been rehearsing her speech from the Torah for the past 6 months. She knew it word-for-word, deep-down, by heart. Ruby picked out a pink dress from Zara to wear. She had a hair appointment at noon. The DJ was getting to the venue at five, catering at six, guests at seven. All eyes would be on her during her speech so she had to look good, or else she would be known as the ‘loser Jewish girl who had a lame Bat Mitzvah.’

Ruby just woke up. It was 9:06 in the morning. She rolled out of her bed and peered out the window. The weather was sunny. A warm April Saturday morning, the perfect day for the perfect party. She skipped into the bathroom with joy. Ruby brushed her teeth, did a facemask, and borrowed her mama’s yummy smelling lotion. The packaging said ‘Peach Bellini Passion’ and it smelled exactly like her favorite candy, Peach Rings. Ruby was hoping to receive multiple packs of Peach Rings tonight. Her best friends Ari and Savannah knew about her love for Peach Rings, Lucas, the color pink, pickles, and Wattpad. If Ruby had her own rendition of ‘My Favorite Things’ the lyrics would include all of those items.

“Ruby!” Mama called from downstairs, “Are you eating breakfast?”

“No!” She called back down, “Too excited!”

Ruby was sitting on her bedroom floor doing her makeup. She was attempting a sparkly cat eye.

“Ruby.” 

Mama hovered in her doorway.

Ruby looked up from her Tarte palette.

“Yeah?”

“I’m so proud of you, baby.”

“I love you Mama.”

“I love you more.” She winked and walked out, “We’ll leave for the salon at 11:40, be ready!”

“Ok!” Ruby screams excitedly. 

Time seemed to drag on. Ruby had finished the first makeup look, hated it, and tried six more before 11:40 finally came.

“I liked the blue one, it made your eyes pop.” Mama said on the way to the salon.

She was referring to makeup look number 4. A blue matte makeup look Ruby tried. 

“My eyes are muddy brown,” Ruby replied, “They can’t pop.”

Mama glanced at Ruby.

“Why do you say that, honey?”

Ruby was annoyed now. What a dumb question.

“Mom, I’m literally the most basic looking person ever,” Ruby snapped, “All you and dad “gifted” me was frizzy, curly, gross brown hair, boring brown eyes, pale skin and pimples-”

“That’s enough Ruby. You’re beautiful just the way you are and you know it hurts me-”

“How do you think I feel?” Tears pooled in Ruby’s eyes. Why did she feel this way? Why was she so emotional? She usually was a pretty confident girl, but today felt off now.

A moment passed before Mama spoke, “What can I do, baby?”

Ruby felt embarrassed. Mama stared down at her with the same honey brown eyes and ringletted brown hair Ruby had. It’s different, Ruby thought. Mama is pretty, but I’m not.

“I just wish I looked cooler or something.” Ruby mumbled and looked out the window. Mama was silent as they pulled into the parking lot of the salon.

At least the sun was out still, Ruby thought, at least one thing was going right.

The salon they went to wasn’t Great Clips. Ruby was in awe of all the older women with luscious locks and pixie cuts. They looked cool and mature. Mama was examining Ruby’s face. 

“This is the salon I go to,” Mama said, “It’s pretty nice in here, right?”

“Yeah.” Ruby replied and looked down at her red Converse. She felt out of place here, like a kid at the grown up table. 

“Are you ready, Ruby?” A pretty lady with purple hair and lots of tattoos said.

Ruby nodded and her and the purple haired lady disappeared behind the curtain.

“Excuse me,” Mama asked the salon receptionist, “Is there any way I can upgrade my daughter’s hair appointment?”

“Sure,” The receptionist replied, “What services would you like to add?”

“How long would it take if she wanted to dye a couple streaks of hair, I don't know…pink?”

“Well, we’d have to bleach it since her hair is dark, which takes about 2 hours, so 3 hours in total.”

“Alright, as long as we are out of here by 4, we should be good.”

“Ok…perfect. I added it to the fee bill.” The receptionist smiled, “I’ll go find Stephanie and tell her.”

“Oh, wait,” Mama rambled, “I want the reveal to be a surprise for Ruby. She wants to switch up her look and I know she loves pink and she hates her hair color the way it is now. I don’t want her to know there’s pink in it until the end.”

“Ah ok,” the receptionist nodded, “that’s such a sweet idea. I’ll make sure Stephanie keeps it a surprise.”

Mama sat down on the couch. She hoped Ruby would be happy. I mean what could go wrong?

“Steph!” 

Stephanie stopped massaging Ruby’s head with shampoo.

“What’s up, Candice?” She responded.

“Can I just talk to you for a sec?”

“Yeah.” Stephanie sighed and dried her hands off.

“Over here.” Candice walked away from Ruby.

“The mom upgraded the blow out,” Candice said, “She wants pink-”

A hair dryer next to them cut her off. 

Candice motioned to her hair and mouthed “pink.”

“Pink dye?” Stephanie asked over the loud hum of the hair dryer, “Highlights, whole head, what?”

“It’s a surprise, like a big reveal ‘Woohoo! Pink hair!’ so don’t tell the girl…shit! Someone’s at the front desk, I gotta go.” Candice hurried to the customer.

What did she say? Big pink hair reveal? So the whole head pink? Stephanie sighed. An hour blow out just became a whole head bleach. Wonderful, she thought. 

Stephanie walked back to Ruby, in the chair. “I’m going to add a special hair mask, ok?”

Ruby grinned, Did she say hair mask? How fancy!

“It’s going to have to sit in your hair for a little while for it to work, ok?”

“Yeah, ok.” It can’t take more than an hour, Ruby thought.

She was wrong.

It was nearly 3:30 and her hair was still wrapped in foil pieces. 

Mama was tapping her foot impatiently.

“Why is this taking so long?” Ruby asked. “Does your hair mask take this long when you come?”

“No,” Mama sighed, “It doesn’t. We should be done soon…by 4.”

“4?” Ruby asked, “My hair is still wet, there’s no way.”

“I’ll be right back.” Mama got up and found the purple haired lady, who Ruby learned, was Stephanie.

Mama and Stephanie appeared to be talking normally, but then Mama got really pale, and Stephanie put her hands over her mouth. They started talking more again, this time, both parties seemed stressed.

What was going on? Ruby thought.

Stephanie and Mama walked over to Ruby.

“Miss Stephanie is going to dry and style your hair in just a few minutes, ok?” Mama said.

Ruby nodded unsurely. Mama walked over to the receptionist and started talking to her too. The receptionist suddenly looked very stressed too, something was up.

A few minutes later, Stephanie brought Ruby into a room in the back with no mirror. She started drying and curling Ruby’s hair behind her back. Her hair felt different. Lighter and thinner. Probably from the hair mask, Ruby thought.

“Alright,” Stephanie said, “You’re all done.”

She unclipped Ruby’s shawl and opened the door.

Ruby walked into the foyer of the salon, and people immediately stared at her. Mama gave her a nervous smile. She looked around for a mirror and then realized she had been right next to one, but she didn’t recognize herself, because her entire head of hair was cotton candy pink. It was no longer brown and frizzy, but pink and fried. 

Ruby suddenly got this feeling in her throat. It was a painful burning sensation. Oh no, Ruby thought, she was about to cry in front of all of these people, in front of Miss Stepahnie, in front of Mama, everyone. 

Ruby refused to cry in public, so she ran. She ran right through the salon, past the receptionist and Mama, all the way into the parking garage. The car door was locked, so Ruby just stared at her reflection in the window and cried.

“Eww! I hate this! I hate this! I hate this! I hate everyone! I hate myself!” Ruby screamed into a concrete post. “I hate myself!” Echoed again throughout the garage.

“I’m sorry.” Mama sighed and unlocked the car door. “The pink hair was my idea, I wasn’t thinking.”

Ruby was stunned. This was Mama’s fault?

She wanted to scream and force her to take her back and fix her hair, but she felt angrier than that. 

When they pulled into the driveway of their house, Mama said, “It’s almost five, so I’m going to the hotel to help the DJ set up. Dad will drive you there in an hour.”

Ruby was silent.

“I’m sorry Ruby.” Mama said again, “Tomorrow we can work on changing the color if you want.”

“If I want? Of course I want to!” Ruby snapped at Mama, “You managed to make me look worse than before…if that’s even possible. I hate you.” 

Ruby had never said that to Mama, and Mama was clearly surprised. She said, “I’m sorry you feel that way about me, baby.” 

Then, she left.

Ruby had about 50 minutes to get dressed and do her makeup before her and dad had to leave. Ruby spent the first 20 of those minutes crying and screaming into a pillow and the last 30 actually getting ready. Her hair and the dress were almost the exact same color. She wanted to cry again, but she couldn’t because she just finished her makeup. I’m going to look like a clown, she thought.

“Kiddo,” Papa called from the hall, “You ready?”

Ruby begrudgingly zipped up the satin pink dress, and walked out of her room.

“Whoa!” Papa exclaimed, “Do I need to get my eyes checked or does my baby girl have pink hair now?”

“Don’t.” Ruby sighed, “Please just don’t.”

Papa dropped it.

On the drive to the DoubleTree hotel, Papa and Ruby practiced Ruby’s speech and pronunciation. 

“It’s perfect!” Papa said, “You got this kiddo.”

Ruby forced a smile for Papa’s sake.

When they finally arrived at the DoubleTree, they were escorted to the venue, which was a spacious ballroom.

Ruby grinned. This place looks awesome, she thought. 

“Ruby, will you check the playlist and make sure these are all the songs you want?” Mama asked by the DJ booth.

“Where’s the DJ?” Ruby retorted.

“You’re looking at him,” Mama jokes and starts twisting the turntables, “just kidding.”

“You better be.” Ruby muttered.

“What did you say?” Mama asked sternly.

“Nothing,” Ruby gulped, “let me see the playlist.”

“It’s on this computer,” Mama said, “the DJ, Phil, will be back in ten minutes, he just went across the street for some coffee. I’m going to help Papa with the caterers.”

Hmm so far, so good, Ruby thought as she scrolled through the Spotify playlist. Lots of her favorite singers, Rihanna, Nikki Minaj, Drake, were all on the playlist. 

Then, Ruby saw something that instantly made her smile. In a Ziploc bag behind the computer were Peach Rings. She immediately grabbed one and started chewing. 

It tasted weird. Different. Kind of earthy, Ruby thought.

“Oh shit.” Ruby said under her breath.

Those were probably the DJ’s and not Mama’s. Some weird off-brand Peach Rings. Ruby thought. Maybe just one more, they may be earthy but they’re still good.

After finalizing the playlist and eating 4 of Phil’s Peach Rings, Ruby walked to the hotel bathroom. Her face was kind of red. 

“Fifty shades of pink!” Ruby laughed aloud. 

Ruby felt good for some reason. She felt a little dizzy, light-headed, hot, and hungry. It was almost seven, so people were going to be getting here soon. All Ruby wanted though, was pickles. She walked out of the bathroom giggling and found her way to the buffet. 

Chick-fil-a sandwiches filled an entire table. Ruby started opening the foil packages and picking the pickles off the sandwich and putting them on a plate. Some of the caterers were staring at Ruby, but for some reason, she didn’t care. Her party, her rules. 

 Mama and Papa came into the ballroom. Crap, Ruby thought and she snuck behind the DJ with her plate of pickles.

 “What up, Phil?” Ruby giggled, and ran off down the hotel hallway. 

What was that all about, Phil, the DJ, thought.

Ruby went back to the bathroom, but there were women at the sink. They looked at Ruby, her plate of pickles, and back at Ruby. So Ruby just smiled and walked into a stall with her plate of pickles and began eating. 

“Ding.”

She got a text from Savannah, “Where are you? Lucas is here.”

Ruby gasped and nearly dropped her remaining pickles. This was it. Ruby suddenly forgot about her pink hair, and the pickles, being mad at Mama, everything. Her hands and forehead started sweating, and she suddenly couldn’t remember her speech. She tried to remember, The Torah and the Jewish, no our Jewish traditions have been steward…stewarded for…many years. It was like her brain had disappeared. She decided then, she wasn’t going to leave this bathroom until the last possible moment. She began looking up Torah passages and desperately attempting to memorize them.

Ruby typed into google: “I feel dizzy and forgetful.”

According to google, she either had some serious health condition or she was intoxicated. Probably from the bleach seeping into my skull, Ruby thought.

“Ding.”

Papa texted her, “Where are you kiddo? Your speech is starting soon.”

He was right. If they were sticking to schedule, she would be giving her speech in approximately six minutes.

She couldn’t do this. She wasn’t ready. She looked stupid and felt even dumber.

There was only one person she wanted to see, so she grabbed her phone and started typing.

When Mama knocked on the stall door, Ruby unlocked the stall and burst into tears.

“What’s the matter?” Mama asked.

“I’m… intoxicated.” Ruby sobbed.

“What?” Mama grabbed Ruby’s shoulders and looked into her eyes, “You look high.”

“What do you mean?” Ruby asked.

“Your eyes are red and watery.” Mama said.

“I was crying, duh!” Ruby sobbed.

“In your text you said you felt dumb, but also felt like everything was funny, but also said you were having a panic attack. Have you been smoking pot?” Mama asked sternly.

“No!” Ruby yelled, “I wanted your help, not your accusations.”

“I…I’m sorry baby. Tell me what you ate today.”

“Nothing, remember?” Ruby responded, “I didn’t eat breakfast.”

“You’ve eaten absolutely nothing today?” Mama asked again.

“Oh crap, I forgot I ate a bunch of sandwich pickles.” Ruby remembered, “Oh and I accidentally ate the DJ’s candy.”

“What candy?”

“Some weird tasting, off-brand Peach Rings.”

“Why do you say “weird tasting” and “off-brand?””

“They tasted different, sort of earthy, and they were in a ziploc.” 

“Oh no Ruby.”

“What?” Ruby’s heart began to race. Was it an underlying health condition?

“I think you may have eaten some edibles.”

“Edibles…like drugs?”

“Yes marijuana, THC, all of that.”

“Am I going to die?” Ruby started panicking.

“No but maybe we should cancel-”

“NO!” Ruby exclaimed. “I’m giving that speech and Lucas is going to see me and he’s going to want me like I want him.” 

Ruby looked at her phone. It was time.

She opened the bathroom stall, “It’s show time!” Ruby exclaimed.

“Ruby, honey, why don’t you sit down,” Mama said.

“No time!” Ruby said over her shoulder and ran down the hallway, into the ballroom, behind the DJ, and onto the stage.

“Ahem.” Ruby tapped the microphone. 

The guests instantly began whispering.

Ruby heard people saying “pink,” “her hair,” “crying,” and “embarrassing.”

Ruby looked down at her silver heels. About 6 squares of toilet paper were stuck to the bottom of her left heel. 

Typical.

She made eye contact with her best friends, Ari and Savannah, they looked worried. So did Papa. Mama must’ve just arrived backstage because she motioned Ruby to come over to her. Ruby shook her head.

Ruby began, “Um…the…The Torah and our Jewish traditions have been stew…stewarded for thousands of years, and um, Each of you have given your love and love of Jewish tradition and a Long, um, time ago, our mothers and their mothers before them…Um…”

Ruby made eye contact with Papa. He looked so confused. Her friends weakly smiled. Lucas was staring at Ruby and he was smiling. Ruby slightly smiled back. 

“I may have accidentally eaten edibles. Mazel tov!” Ruby smiled. 

Everyone's mouth dropped. She walked off stage and surprisingly her mom pulled her into an embrace. 

“Mazel tov? Really, Ruby?” Mama laughed, “Papa is not going to be happy.”

“Yeah.” Ruby sighed.

“Are you happy?”

“Um,” Ruby looked through the backstage curtain. Lucas was still here, “I will be.”

Ruby bee-lined straight to Lucas’s table and sat down next to him. She still felt high and was using that to her advantage. 

“Hi.”

“Hey.”

“Um…wanna kiss.”

“Are you still high?”

“Yeah”

“Ok.” 

Best day ever.

“I like your pink hair,” Lucas said, “and you kind of taste like pickles.”