The Dare

For the first, maybe I shouldn’t have come here. Okay, I definitely shouldn’t have come here. Not after the closing hours. But having these thoughts right now would not help me in any ways. I should have thought about this before accepting the dare. Well, maybe I should have known it was going to lead to a dare after drinking red bull. And now I am in a private library, alone, after closing hours and with a task at hand. But I can thoroughly blame this on the red bull and my ADHD ass. The adrenaline coursing through my veins will (probably) get me through this.

You might think, “Oh, you are just in a library. What’s the big deal?” Yeah, I mean I am in a library, but usually you don’t find yourself in the private library of a governess. The governess who is also responsible for taking care of orphans like me. The governess, who is strict as hell and would expect you to be in bed at this ungodly hour.

You see, she is caring and feeds and educates us well. She doesn’t even have a lot of restrictions. But she is particular about few other things. Like not drinking red bull and not playing truth and dare (She hasn’t said it out loud; but I am pretty sure there is a rule like that somewhere). Also not entering her private library. (That was enforced in our minds since our first day here).

In a matter of few hours, I had broken all the rules. Well, like I said, blame it on the drink and my ADHD. Besides, it could be worse. I could have ended up with a dare to hang upside down from the tower or to eat Sara’s disgusting cookies. (When I say those cookies are disgusting, know that they are a lot worse). All I got to do was get in the private library and look through all the governess’ books and tell all about it to my peers. Easy-peasy. I had thought about lying, but then Anna had eaten Sara’s cookies, and it didn’t feel right lying after that.

The only problem was that I had to scale the tower and go to the topmost piers, which was the library. And then I had to dodge the guards and then figure out the lock combination (READ: I had to break the lock). Nothing much you know, just a regular day in our orphans’ lives. Now that much security meant that the private library held something important or something expensive and unique. Probably illegal too. That part had me bewildered. What could our governess be hiding? Only way to find out was to get my shit together and get inside.

To say that the library was big was an understatement. It was huge. And filled with books… (Duh, it’s a library, what do you think it will be filled with?). There were ceiling to floor bookshelves filled with rare volumes. They were probably extinct. (Do books become extinct?). As I started reading the titles and authors, I was pretty sure having all of them was illegal. There were strict orders that old books (books from the 21st century or even older) should be thrown or burned away. Personally, I thought it was too much. Why burn away good literature? Just because the books were written on sensitive topics and had raised voices against injustice or had predicted an apocalyptic future, it was unfair of the government to burn them away. Plus, it also generated lots of amounts of carbon. More pollution…

But it did not explain why the governess would disobey her own government’s orders. If people found out about this, they would execute her. Maybe I should do the walk of shame and go back to the dormitories and accept defeat. I would not do that though; and the library had already amazed me. There was no going back.

Also, I needed to know why our dear old lady was hiding all these books. As I was skimming through the titles and summaries, I found out that all the books revolved around the subject of defiance, rebellion and those censored sensitive topics. Okaaay… now I was getting really curious. Why were all these writings here? Did my governess like to read them? Or was she a part of a cult or something who were planning an assault on the government? But whatever she was doing, just possessing these books, was an act of defiance. I just realized that my governess was a freaking badass!

“You think I am a badass?” an amused voice behind me asked. And I realized I had just voiced out my thoughts. Also, I wasn’t as careful as I thought I was. Ms. Governess had found me. Now the walk of shame didn’t look so bad as compared to the scolding I was about to endure. I turned around with a sheepish look on my face, still clutching a book in my hands.

However, the governess didn’t look angry a bit. She looked beguiled…? Was I dreaming? Because I was pretty sure that doing this was going to get me in a hell lot of trouble. As soon as I started spurting apologies (sincerely) she shushed me.

“Hey, I knew one day all your curiosity was going to get the best of you, and you were going to sneak up here. Yeah, I didn’t think that day would be so soon, but sooner the better. That’s what they say, huh?” Now I was sure that I was losing my mind. I hadn’t in least bit thought that this conversation would go this way. Heck, I hadn’t thought that this would even be a conversation!

I probably looked panicked, so she quickly made me sit down. “I always thought that the government was doing it wrong by asking people to throw away good literature. That literature needs to be celebrated and lived by. We are doing it injustice by burning them down,” she said with sadness in her eyes. “What those authors wrote about dystopian future…,” she continues with a sigh, “it is probably true. We have a not so good government. As you see the government does care, but they don’t want people to have their opinions.”

“Why?” I asked, confused. Everyone has their opinions, no matter what. Right? Boy, I was wrong.

“When people have their own thinking, they form their own opinions. And as every individual has their own opinions, they voice them out. When you voice them out, it turns to debate. People with different views come together; they discuss, argue and then come towards an end decision. That’s what happens in democracy…”

I wasn’t sure where this was going, so I just kept quiet.

“Our government is spoon feeding you, though. It is training you to just have the same thought process. For you to think as only they want too; and if your thoughts are same, there is no conflict. There is no opposition. But in the end what’s that; but brain washing. Right?”

I now had a bit of an idea about what this conversation was about. “So you are having all these books, so that someday people would read them and learn what their mistake was? So that the people will start having their own thoughts after reading versatile books?”

“Yeah, when people read different books, they develop different views. Everyone interprets the same story differently. And I also want people to enjoy the writings. Well, that’s what my grandmother wanted at least.”

“Your grandmother?”

“Yes. Badass, that’s what you would want to call her,” she said, chuckling. “She was the one who originally had this library. She was alive when ‘burn the books’ law was made. So she kept all these books hiding. And when I was old enough, she ‘gifted’ me with this. She rebelled,” she said while making air quotes around ‘burn the books’ and ‘gifted.’ She continued, while looking fondly at me, “you have always been smart. And you have a sense of your thinking too. So I want you to have this library when you are older. Right now I have given out the books to some trustworthy people to read. As you will grow older, I want you to do this on a larger scale. Maybe it will change the people and might change our world?”

“But isn’t that illegal?” I asked unabashedly.

“Well, that’s the point of rebellion. Also, that’s what badass people do…,” she quipped back at me while walking out of the room. “Also go back to your dorms and do NOT drink that devious drink,” she threatened. But it didn’t feel like a threat because she was laughing.

I walked back, locking the doors and smiling at myself. Funny how a (not so) simple dare could turn into a quiet promise for the future