The Dream Job

It had happened my dream interview with a firm in Northern Island. They want me and I want to work for them. Being a diligent person, plan your journey to get to the interview at two pm on Tuesday.

The easiest way is to get the underground from Brixton to Tottenham Hale, catch the Stanstead express to Stanstead, then catch the Easy Jet flight to Belfast by Easy Jet. What could be easier? The week before had my suit cleaned at the local dry cleaners, then got out the cotton wool and a little bit of water. Spent an hour bulling my shoes until they were like mirrors. I could see myself in the reflection. Even bought a new tie.

I had a timetable written out from the bus from Loughborough Road to Brixton Tube station, to arrival at Stanstead Airport for my flight. What could go wrong?

Kissed my wife goodbye and left home at seven am on Tuesday morning. The council had found a leak in the heating system, and dug up all of the paths over night had a detour to get to the bus stop. Arrived at the bus stop. The monitor showed that the bus was due. The bus arrived and drove straight past. The next bus is due in two minutes, the bus arrives, and the bus driver does not open the doors to let me on, I bang on the doors and shout to no avail the bus driver just ignores me. A minute later the next bus arrives, it stops lets me on and I pay using my Oyster Card. Five minutes later arrive at Brixton tube station, would have been faster walking.

Dodging a few buskers and beggars, run down the stairs to Brixton tube station, put my Oyster card on to the reader, does not open, not enough funds. Run to the ticket machines and buy a ticket to Tottenham Hale. Through the barriers down the escalator and onto the tube train sitting in the station. An announcement comes through the speaker the train has a problem. Jump off of this tube train and go to the other platform where there is no train. After a wait of five minutes, a train arrives. The tannoy announces the first train will be on the other platform. Run back to the other train, we leave the station at last.

Thirty-five minutes later arrive at Tottenham Hale, run to the station to catch the Stanstead Express, buy a ticket, run to the platform to watch the guard blow his whistle and the train leaves the station. Next train due in an hour. My timetable allowed for a long wait at Stanstead Airport, but that time is now diminishing. Should just catch the flight.

An hour later the Stanstead Express arrives, it goes well, no delays, maybe my luck is changing. We arrive at Stanstead Airport. Sprint through the airport get to the check in for Easy Jet. There is a problem with my ticket, the credit card has not fully cleared, need to buy another ticket. My flight is now full and you must catch the next flight at 3:20 pm. My head is in my hands.

I call the company that am going to see and explain to HR better known as Human Remains what has happened today. The lady seems to be quite used to these problems. She says, ‘that is no problem, we will book you into the Premiere Inn at Belfast International Airport.

’Thank you,’ I reply thinking they may have cancelled the interview.

Time passes quite quickly at Stanstead Airport the Easy Jet flight arrives and we all board the flight; it departs on time. My luck is changing. The flight lands at Belfast, amazed expected to ditch in the Irish Sea, but no everything went well. Walk to Premiere Inn at Belfast International Airport. My luck is changing. ‘What is your name sir?’

‘John Stevens’

‘Sorry you do not have a booking here, and we are full tonight. My head goes into my hands, can today get any worse?

‘Sir you said your name is John Stevens’

‘Yes, that is me.’

‘Let me check the other bookings in Northern Island and see if I can find you.’

Stand patiently while the woman checks the system. Praying that she can find me.

‘You are booked into Premiere Inn in the Titanic Quarter; you can catch a taxi there it will be about thirty pounds,’ the receptionist replies.

‘Thank you where is the nearest ATM please’

‘Oh, there is one outside, just go out of the main exit and you will find it on the left. Walk out of the airport building and turn left. There in front of me is the ATM. I put my debit card into the ATM. It accepts the card, starts doing its standard checks of the card to verify it. Then switches off. The screen displays. Sorry not in service.

There is no information on the ATM who to contact if you have a problem. Run inside the Premiere Inn and ask the receptionist, ‘the ATM has just eaten my debit card how do I get it back please?’

The receptionist smiles nicely, it is a bank that is just down the road. Its about half a mile away, turn left out of here and keep going straight. It is Danske Bank. But it is now past five o’clock and the bank will be shut, it would be best if you waited until the engineer comes out.’

This day could not get any worse. My head is in my hands with disbelief. I borrow a chair from Premiere Inn and sit outside by the ATM. Lots of people come up to the ATM and look at the out of service message and walk away shaking their head. At seven o’clock an engineer arrives at the ATM. After explaining my predicament, the engineer gives me my debit card back. Then waits by the machine while I take out one hundred pounds.

A taxi drives past, I wave at it and it stops. Negotiate a fare to get to the Premiere Inn Titanic Quarter, agree a fare of twenty-five pounds. At last, arrive at my hotel, tomorrow, interview, good nights sleep tonight after this day of disasters.

The next morning wake up at seven am, get up do my exercises, shower then go for breakfast. Go for the full breakfast the best start for the day. Sit relaxed eating my breakfast, put the fried egg on to my fork. A waitress walks past me and bumps my arm, knocking the fried egg off of my fork and onto my tie. Disaster, my only tie. The waitress panics and tries to get the egg off of my tie making it worse. New tie and shirt required, before my interview at ten o’clock. The hotel offers to pay for a new tie and shirt. Then supply me with a taxi to take me to the local shopping centre and then to my interview.

At ten am on Wednesday, my interview starts. By eleven o’clock have been offered the position, and a chance to bring my wife to Northern Island to find a place to live