No Escape

    Paul’s muscles flexed and strained. He wanted to fight against the strap holding him down, but at the same time, he wanted to be there.

     “10!” A disembodied voice boomed throughout the confined space.

    Paul strove to put the psychologists’ advice into play. Foresee an issue and take care of it. “Alright, Paulie, check your heart rate, check your breathing, check your muscles.” Talking to himself was probably an indicator things were already awry, but he had to calm himself. 

    “9!” The invisible one bellowed.

     Slowly, his training kicked in, and Paul released his fourth deep breath. His success depended on this! Although fitted into a proverbial straight jacket, he could just glimpse David to the left of him. This was not David’s first rodeo, and Paul saw him wink. David was not one to coddle or hold hands. If Paul freaked out, the guys would never let him live it down. Well, guys and one girl. Paul struggled to spot Elizabeth in his peripheral vision. Elizabeth was more sympathetic than David. Perhaps he could get a silly grin or a consoling wave. Paul pulled and tugged to turn, but he suddenly halted, not wanting people to assume he was having a meltdown. 

     “8!” The tension increased in the speaker’s tone.

    “Think of the good you are doing.” Paul tried to focus, but not being able to see Elizabeth was truly bugging him. “What were the seat assignments in the test runs?” A memory surfaced, and Paul looked above and to the left. “There you are!” His exclamation was transmitted, but he didn’t even care.

     “I haven’t left ya!” Elizabeth’s cheery note came through strong and steady.

     Paul grinned to himself. It would be fine. They were together, and everything was running smoothly. Wait, what was that grinding noise?

     “7!” The relentless timer continued.

     “Thomas! You hear that?” Paul could not care less if he got ribbed for this. He had to know if there was a problem. 

     Thomas, their engineer who sat across from Paul, twisted his head towards the sound. He fiddled with his own straps.

    “Oh, let it ride! I’m sure it’s nothing.” David hollered.

     Paul wasn’t so confident, and he was not going to risk their lives solely on David’s reassurances. He was thankful to see Thomas putting in a call. The relief was instantaneous. The grinding stopped, and Thomas gave him a thumbs up.

     “Just a flap blowing about. We’re good!” Thomas affirmed.

     “6!” 

     Paul resisted the urge to return the yell. He started at his toes and relaxed each body part on the ascent to his head. He pictured the long-term goals and tasks to be achieved. For the good of mankind, he had to go through with this. Besides, there was no leaving now. He was stuck. This was possibly why he was struggling. The reality of no escape was hitting him hard. Maybe, Adam would soothe his nerves. Adam had studied the most about the mental concerns which faced them. 

    Paul shouted, “Adam, everything’s going according to plan, right?”

    “5!” The interruption obliterated Adam’s response.

     “What did you say?” Paul attempted to keep the fright at bay.

    “I said, we are doing fine. Don’t lose sight of your dreams, man! You wanted this, remember? You fought to be here!” Adam’s soft base flowed into Paul’s ear.

    Paul poured all of his attention into the facts Adam had brought up. Paul had gone against 17,648 other applicants that year. His name had been the lucky winner along with 9 others. The last three years were full of struggles and studies. Would he throw those years away with one panic attack?

    “4!” A breathless quality now mingled with the announcer’s excitement.

    Everything rattled and shook. Even if Paul had needed more encouragement, there would be no way to hear the others. A nod and thumbs up were the only forms of communication he could manage. He wished his team would return his gestures, but they had their own thoughts to harness. Although the shields warped his view, their game faces were shining through with an intensity. Yes, this was where he wanted to be. What other group, forced by circumstances, became such a close-knit family? Where else on the planet would he have discovered such camaraderie?

     “3!” It was all but a scream.

    Just like that, his slight self-control disappeared. His foot began to bounce, and his eyelid began to twitch. 

     “No way out! No way out!” His brain chanted.

    A finger touched his own. His seatmate was offering comfort? Paul cocked his head at David. He would never have figured David would relent from his bullying, but it appeared like David was attempting to nod at him. Amazing! Paul had imagined the countdown ending before he was blown away, but this was a momentous event. As he had been telling himself, there was no where on earth he would find someone to watch his back like these guys did. 

    “2!” The exhilaration intensified.

    Paul had no family to leave behind, but he did wonder if his neighbor would take care of his little home as well as he claimed he would. The projected year of isolation would leave his yard open to the offense of weeds and animals. Did he care though? Compared to the vastness awaiting him? He had to decide right now if he could do this. He had to commit in his heart to leave all else behind. He only had a moment more. His psyche would explode if not completely prepared.

    “1!” The echoing number was like a smack to the forehead.

    “Paulie, you’ve had this on your bucket list since you were three. Don’t doubt yourself. Your horizons are about to expand.” His inner monologue settled to a pleasing docility. “This is it!”

    The volume outside vibrated Paul’s very soul. The imminent departure was felt throughout every cell in the occupants’ bodies.

    “Blast off!” Houston’s announcement was drowned out by two hundred decibels of rocket-fueled power. 

    Space rushed towards them, luring them in with its sweet-siren song.