A Change in Life

“Please step right in.”

Mabel feigned a smile toward the young woman who was ushering the line of people through the doorway. Beyond the young woman’s shoulder Mabel could see a soft pink light illuminating a very large room.  Mabel stopped in front of the young woman and looked down to see her name tag “Henrietta.”  Mabel silently cursed  her failing eyesight causing her to lean quite close to Henrietta.   “Am I in the right place Henrietta? The advertisement stated 15 Elm Street, Room 15.”  Mabel picked up a refreshing scent of peppermint.  Such a lovely smell.  Mabel took in another deep breath. 

“Of course you are Mabel.  Now if you would, please step in.  Can’t hold up the line you know.”

Mabel turned her head.  Why there must be thousands of people behind me. But how did…

“C’mon lady.  Either go in or step out of the line,” came a gruff voice from the man standing behind Mabel. She could hear other low grumblings from the others standing behind this man as well.   

“Yes, yes. I’m so sorry, but I don’t know if I want to go in.”

Henrietta gently took Mabel’s arm and guided her aside.  The scent of peppermint with a touch of jasmine filled Mabel’s nostrils.  She inhaled deeply.  The smell was so light and buoyant that Mabel soon felt as if she was floating alongside Henrietta .  “You really don’t have to go in Mabel. Not everyone does.”

“They don’t. But I thought once you arrive there’s no turning back.”

Henrietta led Mabel down a lavender painted corridor having what appeared to Mabel as an endless supply of rooms on either side.  “My, so many rooms. Are they all for us?”

“Oh no. Look here.”  Henrietta pointed to a door with a glass pane.  On the glass in black lettering read ‘Doctors Hernandez and Michaels.’  “Now those two are just regular doctors who administer their talents to the sick.”

“I see. The cancer patients or those that are about to die, I suppose.”

Henrietta laughed.  Her laughter seemed to travel throughout the corridor.  “Don’t be silly.  They treat everything from a common cold to a broken bone. Why would you think otherwise?”

Mabel pondered that question for a moment. “It just seems this place is, well, maybe not for me.  It doesn’t look at all real.”

They came to a wooden bench placed along the wall between two of the offices.

 “Let’s sit a spell shall we.” Henrietta said.   

“Yes. Thank you. I was becoming a bit tired.  Old age and all.”

They sat. Henrietta placed her hand on Mabel’s thigh. “Is that why you came today. Because of your age?”

Mabel chuckled. “No. For being eighty one I believe I’m in fine shape.  Every once in a while I may have a bit of arthritis flare up, but other than that, I feel good.”

“If I may say so, you look exceptionally well.”

“Thank you.”

Henrietta patted Mabel’s thigh. “It’s your face. Your eyes hold a spunk in them. Alive. Wandering. Always searching.  I bet you could see right through me if you tried.”

Mabel took Henrietta’s hand in hers. “Unfortunately I don’t have that type of power.  I can only see what is in front of me. This corridor. You. This bench and the offices.  If I look into the past..”  Mabel stopped here as her chin rested upon her chest. 

Henrietta lifted Mabel’s head with her finger.  “I see. It is your past that fills your presence here today then.  Am I right?”

Mabel nodded as tears began to flow from her eyes.  Henrietta took out her handkerchief and wiped Mabel’s tears away.  “May I tell you something?”

“Of course.”

Henrietta handed Mabel her white handkerchief embroidered with bright red thread along its edges. “When I first saw you standing in line I knew right away you had doubts.”

“How could you tell?”

“When you’ve worked here as long as I have you learn to spot those who are unsure.  They look down, shuffle their feet, always moving about in line and never, ever do their eyes meet mine. It’s an admission of their uncertainty.  We are told to accept and understand these minor inferences.”

“What do you mean? Is this some kind of, of,”  Mabel lost her train of thought.  Do I dare ask if that room leads to heaven?  I don’t want her to think I’m senile. Where did I see their advertisement?  Mabel sighed.  

Henrietta smiled.  Mabel’s such a sweet woman.  I wonder what ever could she want to leave behind in her old life. Henrietta crossed her legs.  “Mabel. Why are you here?  I can only help you move on toward your new life when I know what it is in your old life you want to change or forget.”

“It is such a long story child. Maybe I should go.” Mabel turned and looked  at Henrietta.  “Are you Puerto Rican?  Your skin is so bronzed and lovely. Your eyes are coal black as they sit under your  eyebrows which, may I.”  Mable runs her fingers over Henrietta’s thick eyebrows, “are real. How nice.”  Mabel then lifts a few strands of Henrietta’s long, wavy black hair resting on Henrietta’s shoulder.  The hair reflects the overhead lights of the corridor creating a brilliant sheen.  “Your hair is so soft and luxurious. You must tell me your secret.”

Henrietta laughs. “No secret. Coconut shampoo. And no on being Puerto Rican. I’m from Madrid, Spain.”  Henrietta turns slightly to face Mabel. “There is nothing wrong with changing your mind Mabel. I am not here to force you to do anything you don’t want to do.  I am here to facilitate your transition from your old life to your new one and only if you want. So tell me, what do you want to do?” 

Mabel sighed.  “I thought coming here would change me as the advertisement says. When you reach my age you become tired of lugging about unwanted emotional baggage. All of last year I struggled to change.”

“What could you possibly change Mabel?  What could possibly be that bad to prompt you to be here?”

Mabel begins to tear up. She wipes away the tears then the sniffles from her nose. “You’ll probably think I’m a terrible person but..”

Henrietta smiles. Her dark red lipstick highlights her brilliant white, straight teeth. “I’m not here to judge you at all.  Everyone who comes here is different. Their reasons vary from the simple change of quitting smoking to the more difficult changes like changing their sex.”

“Do people really want that?”

“Oh yes. Not a lot, but those who would rather be a man than a woman or vice versa are very committed.”

“What would make…”  Mabel stopped. Henrietta’s right. I’m not to judge other people. Mabel took the handkerchief in her hands and twisted it a bit.  Her hands were trembling. “I don’t love my family. In fact, I despise them.”  She wiped away more tears. 

“There now”  Henrietta wrapped her arm around Mabel’s shoulder. “A lot of people don’t like their family. There are times I’d like to punch my brother.” 

“No, this is worse. My feelings are deeper than a momentary impulse.  I’m a very rich woman. Over the years I’ve noticed how my two sons, Derrick and Darrel and my one daughter, Sherry are squabbling over who will get what when I die.  They’ve become obsessed with money. Some of their comments to me are vile and treacherous.  My money has consumed them to a point where I don’t even recognize them as my sons or daughter.  Darrell often chides me by asking me when I’m going to die.  Derrick has turned to drugs and alcohol stealing from me to support his addiction.  And Sherry, the youngest, spends her time traveling the world within social circles bearing the names of Givenchy, Chanel and Polo to name a few.  I’ve tried so hard to see them as they were when they were young, vibrant and had their entire lives in front of them. But now, Derrick being fifty three, Darrell fifty one and Sherry at forty nine have turned into people I no longer can recognize. I shudder to be in the same room as them. Their mere presence nauseates me.”

“This is truly a sad story Mabel. And you’ve done everything in your power to overcome such revulsion?”

Mabel has to take a moment to gather herself.  Her hands are trembling. She nods. 

She’s crumbling before my eyes. Think Henrietta of those who have come before her with similar stories.  How did you help them? 

“I am an evil person. To think ill of your own flesh and blood I must be a monster. I do love them, yet their love for me has decayed into greed and avarice. There have been so many times I’ve looked in the mirror and have seen not a reflection of a caring mother, but that of a demon filled with thoughts so perverse and demented ….”

“You’re here now which tells me you want to change. Am I right?”

“Yes.”

“And what would you like to change?”

Mabel took Henrietta’s hands in hers. Through wet and glossy eyes Mabel stared long into Henrietta’s eyes.  “I don’t know honestly.  Maybe to change my heart to feel the love I held for my sons and daughter and erase the dark emotions toward them now consuming my heart.  Can you do that?”

She’s such a darling person yet she holds such regret and grief for what has become.  I cannot change the contempt her sons and daughter hold for her so I must change….

Henrietta stands, faces Mabel then reaches out to Mabel who takes her hands and stands as well.  

“I have an idea but I need your permission to do so.”

Mabel smiled. “I will do what needs to be done if I have your assurance the old will be replaced with the new.”

“Good. Come with me.”

Henrietta takes Mabel’s hand as they begin to walk down the corridor.  They come to a open door and stop.  “There are many doors along this corridor I call “Change.”  Each door represents the change one desires. And here we are.”

The door was open. When Mabel peeked in she could only see a omnipresent white  that obliterated any interior walls or shape.  “This is it?”

“Yes. You walk in and as best as I can tell you, the old is no more. Since I’ve never entered any of these doorways I could not tell you what to expect.”

“I don’t know. It all seems so frightful to me. I’ve worked so hard over so many years to love my children and received nothing but loathing and dislike from them in return over these last few years.  How can walking through this doorway change what I know is…..”

“You must believe as I do that your presence here serves a purpose.  A purpose that led you here, to me, to this doorway.  Why else would you receive the advertisement you did?”

Mabel reaches into her purse and pulls out a folded piece of paper.  She unfolds it. “This can’t be.”

Henrietta takes it and reads aloud, " Simons Grocery at 15 Elm street. Today only. Buy two six packs of Pepsi and get one free. Limited time only while supplies last." Henrietta refolds the paper and hands it to Mabel.  “It was meant to be.”

“But.”

Henrietta embraces Mabel and hugs her for a long time.  Henrietta takes a step back and places both arms on Mabel’s shoulders. “So here we are. Not everyone receives this advertisement. You can either discard it or turn it in for the special.” 

“Yes, I suppose so.” Mabel looks through the doorway and into the room then places the ad in her purse. She takes a deep breath.  “I’m here then, right?”

“Yes you are. It is now up to you Mabel to decide to live a new life by taking the few steps forward and discard your old life or turn around and return to a life your presence here is trying to replace.”  Henrietta takes a step away from Mabel. 

“Where are you going?”

“This is where I leave you.  I have done my job by leading you to the doorway of your change. I can do no more. Be well Mabel. Remember, whether you choose to turn around or walk through the doorway the decision was yours. I was only here to assist you. Be well.”

Henrietta turns and walks away from Mabel.  Soon she disappears down the corridor. 

Mabel stares at the open doorway then down the corridor.  “Good-bye Henrietta.”

Mabel walks through the doorway.

Her children are laughing at the joke she just made.  Mabel is sitting at the end of the table while Derrick and Darrell are sitting next to each other while Sherry is sitting across from them. “Who wants desert?” Mable asks. 

A chorus in unison erupts. “I do. I do.”

Mabel lifts her bell and rings it. She sets the bell down and leans back. Such wonderful children I have. I can’t wait until they grow up.