May Queen

It has been said that she was born in a sunbeam and would pass from this world by moonlight. Makes a life and a death sound pretty romantic, doesn’t it? Silly ancient fables tend to do that in order to make difficult ideologies seem pleasant. I mean, who in their right mind would actually want to live up to a story dreamt up hundreds of years ago and passed along with each and every generation? I sure as hell wouldn’t. But that isn’t my problem. That wasn’t my calling. 

That prophesy belongs to my older sister. Daisy is the May Queen, and I am the spare. 

Yeah, in a world of boundless technology only a touch and a swipe away, I am stuck in a backwards cult that worships a twenty-three year old girl in their generational pursuit of divine communication and blessings from Mother Nature. It’s vomit worthy, really. Believe it or not, we live somewhat normally despite these weird traditions. The town of Wisteria has nice houses that are only around forty or so years old. The high school has a football team that competes well every year with other schools in the region. We have our own Walmart, for Goddess’s sake. There are PTA meetings and community charities. Oh, and we are extremely environmentally friendly. That last one was a given, I’m sure. Anyway, the point I’m trying to make is that we seem normal. Maybe we are normal. But as their little spare, I guarantee that I see the shadows that these folks desperately try to hide with their lottery drawings and community festivals. 

Shit, the festival. I almost forgot about May Day. It’s only the most grandiose fair in town. It’s complete with rides, live music, costumes, and dances with the May Queen. Daisy will be paraded all throughout town on a glittering float in some fancy prom dress, tossing rose petals and seed packets at little kids lining the route. It’s one of her biggest public appearances of the year. She’s participated since she was first proclaimed the title at three years old. I’m always forced to go so I usually just sneak off, grab a roasted corn cob, and hop on the thrill rides until it got dark and we would finally go home. 

This year will be different, though. The first day of May actually has snow in the forecast. That has never happened in the community’s history, and so it was cause for great concern from the elders. I guess I can’t blame them. We are all pretty concerned. Honestly, I couldn’t care any less for the shitty festival or any other weird cultural norm we take so seriously around here. My concern is for one thing only – my sister.

Daisy was diagnosed with leukemia last fall and she is not doing too well. There have been chants, healing circles, and fasting movements that would last weeks. What my sister needs is a fighting chance! Our parents and the rest of Wisteria refuse to allow her to be seen by an actual doctor and be given western medicine that could actually save her life. Instead, I get to watch her slowly decay with each passing day. She was once so vibrant and beautiful, with bright golden hair struck platinum by the bleaching of the sun and skin tanned a delicate bronze. She truly was Goddess-like and very well fit every silly characteristic from those lame old stories. Now… well, now she was falling apart. 

I watched her carefully apply the make-up at her vanity. The lighting surrounding the mirror was harsh and washed her out even more than usual. I know that she saw me standing there. Even at her most ill she seemed to always know when I was near. Her eyes met mine from the mirror and she nodded for me to finally enter her bedroom. 

“You don’t have to do this. One year won’t matter. Just rest… you don’t need to do this,” I pleaded. She tried to smile but her lips only cracked, a small bead of blood formed in the crease of gray flesh. 

“It is my duty. It’s my duty until the end,” she answered me hoarsely.

“Like hell it is! You’re obviously too weak for this. Please, just call off the parade. They will understand-”

“Do you hear yourself? There can never be a May Day without the May Queen. You must want the Creator to withdraw Her blessings.” She interrupted me coldly as she dusted highlighter on her cheeks. 

“Listen to me, this May Queen stuff is bullshit! You are a human being just like everyone else, and you need serious help. Just look at yourself! If you were so close to the Goddess, why is she doing this to you, huh? Why are you being made to suffer? If you are Her special Queen then why doesn’t she take this all away from you? Damn it, Daisy – you are going to die!” I snapped. Time seemed to pause for who knows how long. Her eyes left me from the mirror. She set her brush down with a small clink on the table. 

“You don’t understand… I am the Queen. If I don’t go out there and smile, and wave, and tell the little children that they are special just like a brand new seed, do you know what will happen? Hope will die. Perseverance to work through the challenges and wonder of the unknown will all disappear. It is my duty to live up to the stories. You’re lucky, you know. You don’t have to live up to anything aside from what you reap for yourself. My path is pre-destined and I am in no position to ever argue with that.”

Her words were sharp and weak with a gasping breath after each point. To my knowledge, my sister has never once questioned her place in the world. She never wanted to give up her title and live a normal life. Being the May Queen was her one and only goal.

I left her room. There was no talking sense into her. She was just as brainwashed as the ignorant elders. 

The festival this year was much more extravagant than any I had ever seen before. It was remarkable! There were candles in every single window of every house, office, and store. The street lamps were wrapped with flowering garland and the bulbs were even replaced with those that would flicker to resemble flames. Food and games were everywhere, and the music was so electrifying that people were actually dancing in the streets. It was beautiful. I had an idea why the elders went all out with the festivities this year… and it broke me.

This was Daisy’s final May Day. 

My parents usually accompanied the elders during festivals. It was a special perk as the mother and father of the May Queen and they loved every moment of it. It wasn’t abnormal for me to be left on my own, and I also enjoyed it this way. This year I only wanted to be near them, and they were no where to be found. It was possible that they would ride the float with Daisy this year, but I couldn’t even find the float. Usually it was decorated by the children in Towne Centre before it would tail the parade. I was beginning to wonder if Daisy had actually changed her mind! Maybe she decided that I was right and would skip this charade. 

But that doesn’t make a lot of sense, does it? Why would she forgo the festival after so much extra work went into this one? And she was so adamant about attending only about an hour beforehand. I continued to look around. Surely I would run across an elder or someone who would know what was going on. But the streets were so congested with people. I had a difficult time pushing through. Why were there so many more people here? Has it always been this way?

“Laurel!”

I heard her voice calling me, and from over my shoulder I spotted her. She wore a long, white sundress, the hem grazed the pavement. It was simple. No shine, no glitter. Only white cotton. Her brittle hair cascaded past her shoulders and down her back. Her skin was gaunt and her bones protruded. Her beauty was gone and in its place was a sickly body with what seemed to be moments left in this realm. I felt my feet pound the pavement and before I even realized what I was doing I embraced her. Everything inside of me screamed. This was my sister. This was my blood. And she was truly dying. 

She wrapped her arms around me as I sobbed uncontrollably. I couldn’t help it. How could someone so pure and gentle suffer so terribly? How could this be allowed to happen? If only I could have convinced her to run away with me, she just might have overcome this by now! 

“The Goddess smiles on you, my little sister,” she whispered warmly as we continued to hold each other. The crowd had grown tighter around us, watching. I noticed my tears had left spots in the cotton dress that she wore. I pulled back but her arms still locked around me. 

“Let’s just go right now. There is still a chance… we can still try.”

“I know this. Just give me a little time. We will leave tonight. When no one is looking,” she whispered to me again. I couldn’t believe it! She finally agreed! Maybe… just maybe she would pull through this!

The festival commenced. Folks partied and alcohol flowed freely. It was a bizarre sight, but not too out of the ordinary. A chill blew through the crowd, and despite the hover of warm bodies everywhere, the temperature steadily dropped. There was still no sign of the float and the parade was scheduled to start soon. So, I waited. And waited. I drank a little here and there to pass the time. This day was passing at an achingly slow pace. 

And then it was time for the parade. Only, there was no parade. There was a pyre instead brought to Towne Centre. It was huge – at least twelve feet tall and rolled out on wheeled flats. I couldn’t believe it. They had seriously replaced the parade with a damn bonfire? The parade was a tradition! I obviously wasn’t a stickler for those things, but the parade was the one thing that really made these things half way bearable and worth coming to! 

Oh. It wasn’t a bonfire. I was wrong. 

I pushed through the crowd to get a closer look because I had heard shouting. It wasn’t a bonfire at all. 

It was a funeral pyre. 

My sister was tied to the wooden mass. She wasn’t resisting, she wasn’t saying a word as the crowd shouted to untie her. The elders surrounded the pyre and kept any heroes at bay. I could not believe it! I felt my face flush as I pushed even harder through the crowd.

“What is going on? Get her off of that damn thing! Are you out of your minds?” I yelled hysterically. The elders seemed frozen and my sister still didn’t react. She only stared blankly into the distance, as if she was drugged. I couldn’t take it! I ran to her and started tugging at the ropes, but I was quickly grabbed and pushed into the concrete. 

“Stop this! You’re all insane!” I screamed over and over as a match was struck to light a torch. Even the crowd fell silent at this, apparently giving up at the sight of the festering flame being brought ever closer to the pyre. 

“No no no! You can’t do this – you can’t! Hey… hey, take me instead!” I desperately screamed. Before reaching the base of the pyre, the masked elder stopped suddenly. He pulled the torch away and turned to face me. 

“Take me. Take me instead. You can’t hurt her. She’s your stupid Queen! I’m nobody… take me instead. I don’t understand… why are you doing this? Why are you doing this?” I cried. I couldn’t see anything else through the stinging tears. Someone grabbed my arms and pulled me to my feet. In what seemed like a quick shove, I was pressed against a sharp surface. I felt the burn as the ropes slid across my skin. Though my sight was hazy, I finally began to realize what was happening. The bastards were taking me up on my generous offer.

I saw Daisy standing next to our parents directly in front of me. They were smiling. Everyone was smiling! Panic started to build and I desperately tried to move, but the ropes held me tight and firm to the pyre. The overwhelming odor of gasoline gagged me. The wood was absolutely soaked with it and I could feel it cling to my skin.

“You are so lucky, Laurel. You didn’t have to do this. You could have left at any point and not a soul here would have blamed you. But I think you finally understand… sometimes destinies have a way of overcoming even the most stubborn,” Daisy spoke in her usual, powerful voice. Loud enough for the rest of the crowd to hear her, as well.

“You… you’re insane. Get me off of this thing! This was a nasty trick, Daisy!”

“Sorry, I can’t do that. A sacrifice has to be made. A life lost for a life saved. By giving yourself willingly to Her, she will grant me life once more! It is the wisdom of the Great Goddess!” Daisy called as she held her arms to the sky. Dusk was quickly approaching.

“Mother Nature doesn’t freaking exist! This is unbelievable! I swear to – get me off of this damn thing! Mom, Dad, help me!” I screamed louder than I ever recall doing before, but it did no good. 

“Don’t worry. You are saving me. This is the greatest gift you could ever give me… and it will not go without reward. You are my divine martyr.” She said and then nodded to the elder still holding the torch. 

Time stopped. Well, it seemed like it did. The voices and chaos dulled and became a ringing in my ears. I noticed the snowflakes that fell gently, caught in the light of the flame. They seemed to dance and swirl with the wind as they plummeted to the ground. They should have known their delicate beauty would be brief and unappreciated. Still... this tiny moment separated by time meant a breath of peace for me. It actually snowed on May Day. It was the silence before the storm.

In a matter of seconds, the flame ignited with the gasoline. The smoke choked me, the fire lapped at my legs and quickly climbed with unbelievable intensity. It was a horrible end. There isn’t quite a good way to describe the feeling of burning to death. I wish the suffocation from the smoke would have taken me first, but the wind blew it in the opposite direction after a moment of filling my lungs. The fire took me within minutes of pure terror and sheer pain. 

I was wrong after all. That little story about being born in a sunbeam and dying by moonlight was never meant to describe the twisted beginning and end of the May Queen. 

It was meant to describe the life and death of the May Martyr… the spare.