Much worse

“Can you keep a secret?” It was a simple question, innocent enough. It was often accompanied with the usual wide eyes-usually avoiding mine, the whispery voice, barely a breath with the trivial hope that another human wouldn’t hear their next words. There was even the occasional lip-biting, the hair twirling, and other meaningless fidgets that are often associated with anxiety, nerves. So why did this particular instance have to differ so much? Why did this one have to stand out from the crowd? This girl was hardly different from the rest, heart-shaped face, baby blue eyes with her dark earth-like hair billowing in soft, wave-like curls to frame her face. She scarcely stood out in the surplus of human’s I have seen over my existence, so why was she any different? I knew how. 

Her eyes didn’t avoid me, instead they glared down at me,narrowed with determination.

She didn’t whisper, her voice was clear and loud, one that demanded to be heard, listened to. 

She didn’t fidget, not a single tremor of fear was shown, her lip was unbitten, her hair untwirled.

“Can you keep a secret?” She had asked, and I hadn’t answered. 

She stared at me, whether waiting for me to respond, or for effect, I was not sure, until finally her lips parted and the words that left them, white seemingly ignorant at first, would eventually send my whole world crumbling down like a stack of cards.

“I know yours,”

And so she did.  

Although I would come to know the truth, that was not one of the worries that flashed through my mind at that point. Only a very few, petty questions consumed my attention. Does she think I care? Why isn’t she scared? Why is she talking to me? Those were all shoved aside by the next words out of her mouth. 

“Your a siren,” 

She knew.

She knew.

Only my years and years of careful practice and self-control kept my expression blank, my stance loose, and uncaring. But no amount of practice could stop the wave of panic that crashed down on me in that moment. 

“I’m sorry, what?” Keep calm, smile lightly-not showing your teeth, turn your head to the side, pull your eyebrows together, flutter your eyelashes. 

Her expression went blank, her mouth falling open with a tiny pop. It was working.

“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean,” Use physical contact. My finger brushed absently down the side of her arm, resting on the tip of her wrist. 

Her next reaction was not one that I was hoping for. 

She suddenly stiffened, and my hand dropped instinctively. Her eyes slammed shut, and her head whipped back and forth as if she was trying to shake something out of it. 

“Stop doing that,” She growled.  

“Doing what?” I asked innocently, wondering idly why she closed her eyes, was she finally scared of me?

Her eyes didn’t open, and the curiosity burned on “Looking at me like that...compelling me,” 

I lost my facade for a moment, but swiftly regained it, “Why don’t you explain to me whatever it is that I am doing?” I offered as I leaned farther forward, letting my breath tickle her cheek, surely this would make her open her eyes, surely this would make her listen. 

Her eyes tightened, but never opened “Because you're a siren,” I very nearly lost my cool there as realization hit me. But I forced myself to stay there, I forced myself to breathe evenly, I forced myself not to react in any way. She knew I was...compelling her, and she found a simple solution. If she closed her eyes, she couldn’t see me, I couldn’t trick her into listening by my usual tactics. She wouldn’t open her eyes to see them. That’s fine, I convinced myself, I have other methods. Maybe less...practical, but they worked nonetheless. Or they should. 

My finger slowly found the tip of her hip-bone, where she would barely feel it, it would work better if I was willing to wrap my arms around her, but I wasn’t. I would have to force her to listen. 

I already knew this girl's weakness, curiosity. 

I chuckled once, paused briefly and then started again. It only took a few seconds before she finally gave into her interest. 

“What?” 

I answered between a fitful of fake laughs, “You think I’m a mermaid,” 

Her lip twitched self-consciously, “Siren,” she corrected.

“Regardless,” I said using a tone that questioned her sanity, “I can assure you I don’t moonlight as a mutant fish singing love ballets to sailors,”

Her eyes opened slowly, judging the threat, “So you know about sirens?” 

“Well I don’t live under a rock, any normal person tends to zone in on 

occasion during mythology class,” I quickly drove the conversation away from my most recent slip-up, my knowledge on the topic. 

“I don’t believe you,” 

My face hardened, my smile flattening into a strait line, my hand retreated to my side. Why wasn’t it working? Why wasn’t she listening? Was I losing my edge?

“Believe what you want, I don’t care,” That was a lie. I cared very much. Too much. 

She barely hesitated. “I’m right, and I’m going to prove it,” She whisked around and stalked off before I could even react. Red hot rage curled in my chest and my fists balled involuntarily. She would never learn the truth about me, I would make sure of it. 

I marched after her in a determined fashion, feeling my lips curl back over my teeth. Fine, my other strategy wasn’t working, alas I had a different skill set, a more hands-on one. Now that I was less concerned about practicality, surely I could justify my actions as self preservation. This girl was a danger to me, and I didn’t stand for danger. I walked after her with purpose, with a duty.

I felt a dull hum burn in the center of my chest as the transformation started. A low growl escaped from between my chelched teeth.

She was wrong. I was not a mermaid. 

No, I was much, much worse.