Holes in My Story II

Holes in My Story II

Is there a catch, Liza?

The catch is I can't get the clasp on our harness to catch, Mr. Henry. This is bad!

Nah, that's good.

Why is that good?

I really didn't want to jump out of a perfectly good airplane anyway.

Okay, that's good then.

Nope, that's bad.

Why is that bad?

I'll never get my bucket list completed.

Oh, that is bad.

Nah, that's good.

How is it good?

There is a hole in my bucket, Dear, Liza. All my dreams and aspirations slipping away.

Well, fix it, Mr. Henry, Dear Henry. Can't you fix it.

No, I left the flex-seal in my car.

Where's your car?

In my garage.

No problem. Go get it.

I can't, Dear Liza. I can't. The garage is gone.

Where's your garage?

Gone with the wind. Carried away by a tornado.

That's bad.

No, that's good.

How can that be good?

I always wanted an open-concept house. Without the attached garage it's open.

Well, then, good news if that's on your bucket list.

No, that's bad.

How so?

My bucket list got carried away, too.

Can't you rewrite your list?

Afraid not. No pen or paper, either.

Carried away, huh? Then put it on your computer.

Can't do that. No connection.

Oh, I see. Got taken out by the tornado.

Nope, got knocked out when the tree punched a hole in the roof.

Oh, Henry! That is too bad.

Nah, that's good.

Why is that good?

Now I can put in the skylight I have always wanted.

How wonderful! Something else you can cross off your bucket list?

No, that is bad.

Why bad?

My house got relocated during the hurricane.

Your house got hit by a tornado and a hurricane? That is bad.

It's all good. Couldn't see the tornado coming in the hurricane.

That is good. So where is your house now?

In the middle of the lake, I think.

Bad?

Nah, I always wanted lake front property.

Good. Remembered another thing on your bucket list.

Bad. It cracked the ice.

Why is that a problem?

That's where I was practicing my curling for the Olympics. My stone went straight to the bottom through a hole in the ice. Now I will never become an Olympian.

Another bucket list wish?

Doesn't everyone want to win a Gold Medal? It was the only sport I was any good at.

Oh, that's bad.

Turned out good after all. Had to go deep sea diving to retrieve the stone. Something else I was hoping to do. And now I can finally have more time to travel the world.

That is good.

Nah, that's bad. I don't have enough money to travel the world.

That's too bad because you just remembered another bucket list wish.

Maybe I can make it good by winning the Lotto.

That is good.

Unfortunately, it's pretty bad 'cause I didn't buy a ticket. But perhaps I could win a short story contest.

Now, you're thinking! That will be very good.

No. Bad. Trouble is there is a hole in my story.

Could be there are several holes but it's good you are recovering more of your list. Maybe you could go to Vegas. They have a lot of replicas of attractions from around the world. You could cross the 'travel the world' one off the list with one visit. It would be a lot cheaper, too.

That would be bad. My Ex lives in Vegas. I can't go back there. She left a hole in my heart.

That's too bad.

No, it turned out good. I have a much better marriage now. And it fulfilled a must-do one on my list. 'Epic love life'.

Sounds like you are getting them done even without being written down. Have you given any thought about what you are going to do concerning your car?

Well, I thought about renting a Corvette. That would take the 'drive a fast car' off the list.

That would be good.

No, turned out bad. The Corvettes were all out filling other people's bucket lists.

That's too bad.

Turned out good. They gave me a rusted-out Ford Ranger.

How could that be good?

There was a hole in the floorboard. My feet went straight through. Felt just like Fred Flintstone driving it.

And that was good?

Got to live like a movie star!

Good, good! Another one bites the dust.

No. Bad. That put a hole in my shoe leather. My best hiking boots. Now I can't hike the Appalachian Trail, either.

Too bad.

No. All good. I have no business hiking the Appalachian Trail at my age. I can barely go two blocks let alone 2000 miles.

So it is okay to cross that one off.

Definitely a hole in my head thinking I could do it. Maybe I can still get a round of golf in using a cart and get a hole in one.

Be sure to wear two pairs of pants then.

E-ewe, that would be bad!

***

Now about that harness, Mr. Henry. We better see if we can get it to clasp.

So what is the catch, Liza? Thought we didn't need to jump.

Just got word through the mike in my ear from the pilot. Seems there is a hole in the engine.

That's bad!

No, it's good. Looks like you're gonna get your chance to jump out of a plane after all. This one isn't so perfectly okay now. She's going down!

That will be good. I hope.

Sure it is good. One more thing off your long bucket list. Don't need to worry about the hole in your bucket anymore. Sounds like almost everything is done. Oh, by the way. Have you ever wanted to become an astronaut?

Well, of course. It has been on my list since I was a child. Why do you ask?

It's our turn to make one small step for man out this hole in the plane and ONE GIANT STEP FOR MANKI-I-I-i-n-d>>>>>