14 comments

Drama Romance High School

She:

His eyes. Glisten when the sun hits. Beautiful, long eyelashes that frame his big, hazel eyes. His hair. Curly and light brown. Bounces ever so graciously every time he runs in track and field practice. His face. So silky smooth, marked with perfectly rounded freckles. His body. With the touch of it, I would be sent straight to Heaven. He's an angel. A work of art no one is worthy of understanding. A creation, so extraordinary that I can't bear to explore. Then there's me. Always in the background, hiding. Never gets noticed because I'm just plain. Nothing sticks out. Not even my chest. My height is below average. My weight is in between curvy and thin. My hair is short, frizzy, and wild. My eyes plain and brown. I'm just weird. A mixed-breed. African from my mother and Hispanic from my father. I probably stick out to the others that have freshly manicured nails and straightened, shiny blonde hair. Walking around the halls of Plymouth High School Prep like they're walking on a catwalk. They look at me like I'm some lower-class mutt. Little do they all know I live in the same type of big, shiny, modern ranch house that they live in. I'm not a snob. I don't brag about what I have to show. I'm not some other rich, daddy's girl. I can never compare and that's why my mother says I'm special and why my father says any guy would be so lucky to have me as theirs. What he doesn't know is that I already have my eyes on someone. The most gorgeous human alive... Percy McCallen. He would never go out with me. Why would he? He has half the school drooling all over him. They want him as some handsome trophy they can brag to their friends about. Not me. Percy is much more than his looks. Don't get me wrong, he's hot, but he's far more than that. Far more than what the others see him as. He's smart. He studies his butt off for his exams. Scrunches his little nose when he's frustrated and doesn't know the answer to a question. He begs to be taken seriously when the other teammates think of him as the coach's pet. He waits until everyone leaves, after practice, so he can walk home because his father is working late shifts and can't pick him up. He's different. Under his perfection he has to show everyone. He's even on scholarship, but no one would know that. No one would know any of this... except me. I study him. I see his true self. The true Percy McCallen.

 

He:

Her eyes. Plain, but filled with wonder. Her hair is short and curly. It frizzes up when it's humid out. When running, she ties it up when it gets in her face. Her body's tiny, but still takes some space. Always to herself, but I can tell she has so much to spill out. I can tell she has no friends. All the other girls pass by her with mean stares. As soon as they see me, they wave and smile, with their perfectly made teeth. Even though a bunch of them are mean to her, she secretly tutors them. Not spilling the truth that they actually want to get into, some overpriced, college. She studies in the corner of the Learning Commons, by herself. Focused so hard on making every question right. She sits in the back of the class. Every time the teachers ask a question her hand is raised low. Knowing the answer, but not wanting the others to stare at her when she says it. Her parents always hug and kiss her, after dropping her off in the loop. She's so lucky to be able to have parents who love and support her when I just have a dad that always tells me "Don't fail me, son. Everything's on the line". She runs fast. Faster than the others, but stays in place so no one can see. I want to run beside her. Motivate her and tell her to not care who's watching. I want to cheer her on every time she gets an answer right at the Math Maniac Contests. The smartest, kindest, prettiest girl in our school... Ayana Johnson. She doesn't care about what she wears. She doesn't care if the others think she's some poor girl on scholarship. She's just like us. Actually, she's better than us. She doesn't flaunt how much money she has or how her mother is a lawyer and how her father is a doctor. I study her. I see her true self. Ayana. Meaning "beautiful flower". That's exactly what she is.

 

Others:

"There he is! The Junior Track and Field Meter Run superstar, Percy McCallen! He's on his last lap with a time of 10:04!" the speaker overhead the bleacher's shout. "Go, Percy! Go!" the crowd screams.

 

He:

I run as fast as I can. Searching through the runners, from different school districts, for one specific person. This is the last Track and Field Meter Run Championship Race, until next year. Our team is doing very well, especially with me in first, so far. Austin Tuskin is only a few feet away. I try to run, run as fast as my long legs can take me. Our school has never done a big race like this. 3,000 meters is a lot. We've been practicing for so long to get to where we are now. We can't blow this now.

 

She:

This is it! This is where I'm going to show who I am. To show the school who I am. To show them how fast I can run. To show Percy that I've been following his lead. How I'm going to win in the top 3, for him. I run and run and run. Running, keeping my head down. Passing feet. I run and run and then... Boom!

 

Us:

Hands under my hands. Sweat under my sweat. Heavy breathing under my heavy breathing. I open my eyes. There he is. There she is. The person I've been dreaming of. That I studied. That I had feelings for all this time. The person I want to tell everything to. Percy. Ayana.

 

I pull off of him. She pulls off of me. Head racing. People talking in the back. All I can see is Percy. All I can see is Ayana. His eyes staring back at me, for once in his life. Her eyes finally looking up and not hiding her beauty. I want to brush his curly, sweaty hair out of his eyes. I want to take that silly hair tie out of her hair. I want to tell him my name and how the meaning doesn't match who I am. To tell her how my life isn't what it seems. To tell him... To tell her...

 

"I love you."


January 08, 2021 22:35

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14 comments

Writer Maniac
12:22 Jan 12, 2021

Woah! This story progressed even faster than the last one! I can't for the life of me understand how they could go from not saying a word to each other to confessing their love in such a short span of time. I also would have appreciated a heading or something indicating the change in perspective. The concept is once again good, but I think the plot itself can be worked on further.

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Jay D Mer
14:17 Jan 12, 2021

Lol okay, thanks. I'll keep that in mind. It can still be edited, so I'll see what I can do. Thank you a lot :)

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Writer Maniac
15:09 Jan 12, 2021

No problem :)

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Michelle Joseph
22:53 Jan 20, 2021

This is a very unique style of writing and I quite enjoyed reading it! It reads poetically, especially when Ayana and Percy are describing how they see each other. I do think it progressed very quickly though, from both of them stealing glances at each other to confessing their love. I would suggest implementing some characterization as it would help your characters stand out like they are a real person. All in all, it was a very interesting read!

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Jay D Mer
12:27 Jan 21, 2021

Thank you very much for reading my story and commenting. I appreciate the feedback and the kind words:)

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Thom Brodkin
16:12 Jan 20, 2021

Your writing style is unique and well worth the read. I would never have thought of approaching this prompt in the way you have. Is there truth in this story? It seems as if there is. It feels very real and raw. If it's true its well documented. If its fiction it speaks to your talent. A great read. Keep writing you definitely have stories to tell.

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Jay D Mer
16:27 Jan 20, 2021

This is also quite possibly the best feedback I've received. I so appreciate every word you've commented. This story is in fact fiction, but imagine if it was true... My thoughts just happen to roll onto what I write. I'm glad you liked it and I sure will keep writing. As for you, even if you think you can't write in a certain category, tell yourself you can because trust me, you can! Keep working hard. ~Jay Thank you sm :)

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Amel Parvez
15:20 Feb 24, 2021

awesomeee!!!!! just loved it! :)

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Jay D Mer
15:28 Feb 24, 2021

Thank you!!:) I'm so glad you liked this. Honestly, this story is one of my personal favs. If you like romantic stories like this you should read "Dug in Deep" by me.

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Amel Parvez
15:51 Feb 24, 2021

you're welcome<3 yeah i do like romantic ones so iam gonna read that ASAP!

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Jay D Mer
16:01 Feb 24, 2021

:) Hope you enjoy it

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Amel Parvez
16:03 Feb 24, 2021

:D

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00:16 Jan 23, 2021

I really like the different perspectives in the story! I actually liked the story in general. It was so great to read something that poetic. I’m really liking your writing style. (Btw thx for the follow! Appreciate it). I agree with Writer Maniac when she/he/they/whatever pronoun they are says that the story progressed quickly, but it’s hard to keep it at a steady pace when you can only write up to 3k words. Nice work!

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Jay D Mer
13:02 Jan 25, 2021

Thanks for reading and enjoying my story. It is sort of hard with only 3k word limit, but I tried:) I'll find time to read some stories by you because no one is the worst writer. I'm sure you write great stories. (Found your name on the beautiful doc thing) :)

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