Secret Santa

Donald and his cousins screamed as they ran through the house. Tyrannosaurus! Mastodon! Triceratops! Sabre toothed tiger!

Wait, I’m the Sabre toothed tiger. 

Tsitsi had stopped running. Yellow is my favourite colour. 

No, it’s mine. Tanya stood staring at Tsitsi, arms folded.

Donald could sense a fight coming and he was not about to have his holiday ruined. Two weeks wasn’t enough time to pack in fun and fights. Those had to be kept to a minimum. 

Guys why don’t you switch every two rounds, he suggested. 

By now the power ranger ‘mission’ had paused to resolve this internal disagreement. 

Donald walked up to the girls, Guys come on. I think it’s a fair solution, this way no one has to get bored. Let’s have a power rangers agreement and shake on it. He looked at Tsitsi hoping that she would agree because he knew Tanya was stubborn. Disappointed because all eyes were on her, Tsitsi reached out her hand to Tanya. 

Deal, Tanya said with a mischievous smile. 

The mission was back on and so was the screaming. They ran from the outside patio into the kitchen, to the living room then into the enclosed veranda, back into the living room then off to the study. 

Hey! You guys are going to break something and I’m going to spank someone! Donald’s Aunt Patricia yelled from the kitchen. 

Donald’s Mom had decided that after a long year she and Donald needed to spend Christmas with the rest of the family. So the two of them had packed a suitcase each and boarded a flight from the UK back to Zimbabwe. When they landed, the first thing Donald felt was the warm sun. The beanie and green bomber jacket were now useless in the unrelenting heat. They had been gone for only three years, but he had already forgotten what a truly warm summer felt like.

He had kept his eyes transfixed on the unending farms and fields that blended into one another as they drove east of Harare from the airport. An almost four hour drive to Mutare, the sleepy little town that bordered Mozambique. The sleepy little town where very little happened, and where he could speak as loudly and as often as he wanted and be heard. Here his accent wasn’t funny and he didn’t have to explain the meaning of his first name: Tinotenda (we are grateful). 

On the way they had picked up three other cousins and an Aunt Gertrude and Uncle Blessing. Yes, Donald loved snow, but this holiday was filled with the promise of an adventure climbing Mango trees, and playing in the big hill that felt like a mountain in his aunt’s backyard.

The best part of it all was that Aunt Patricia believed in Santa Clause, something his mother always vehemently told him to forget about. 

Christmas is about Jesus Donald, I can’t tell you some fairytale, his mum would proclaim every time Donald’s eyes lingered on the long queue leading up to Santa’s seat in the mall. Why do you think there is Christ in the word? Not some white man with a beard bringing you gifts. 

It’s not that Donald didn’t like the story of Jesus coming to earth, but he liked the idea of being brought gifts at the end of a long year of trying to be a good boy. Because this was Aunt Patricia’s house, he knew his mom was not going to say anything. He would hear all about the true spirit of Christmas when they went back and he was fine with that. 

Aunt Patricia had strung up eight socks above the fire place, one for each child. Even the older cousins, Grace and Tonderai, who claimed not to believe in children’s stories anymore were eagerly collecting sweets out of a stocking every morning. 

We’re just doing it to enhance your holiday experience guys. We want you to have great Christmas memories, that’s why we’re playing along. These words they would say as they walked away to listen to Tupac and Naughty By Nature cassettes. 

But that night, things were different, everyone was excited. Donald’s mom was in the kitchen with her siblings preparing the Christmas meal. Uncle blessing wasn’t doing much cooking though,Instead, he was having his fourth of glass of spiked Mazoe peach crush and giving instructions from his stool by the kitchen door. Gertude those cabbage strands are too thick, no one is going to like that salad no matter how much mayo you put on it. Iiii Amai Donald! That salt is too much. Donald’s aunts and mum said they only tolerated it because they felt sorry for Uncle Blessing. He was the only boy in their family and he did not have one of his own. So they rolled their eyes and laughed as they stirred the pots on the stove. 

At some point, the power ranger mission had been abandoned for another day. The study had gone from a meeting place to discuss important strategies on how to fight an evil villain, into a hangout discussing what everyone thought they would get for Christmas. 

Hey, let’s shake the boxes and see if we can figure out what’s in them, Tinashe said.

I hope Aunt Gertrude wasn’t stingy this year, Tanya said. They all laughed. No-one like being paired up with Aunt Gertrude for secret Santa. She always got the weirdest gifts. One Christmas she got Tsitsi a pair of earrings that were oddly matched: one earring was a fork, the other a spoon. She said they were all the rage in Germany where she had bought them. 

There’s only one way to find out what everyone got. 

Tinashe bolted out of the study into the living room. Donald and the other four dashed after him. They all stood in front of the big Christmas tree and stared at the boxes underneath it. 

Do you hear that? Tinashe asked. 

They all looked at him confused. 

Listen, he said as he approached the tree slowly. 

There was the whistle, louder this time. 

I hear it, Tanya’s eyes widened. 

But before they could investigate the boxes any further Aunt Patricia emerged from the kitchen. You don’t want to spoil your own Christmas surprises do you? Donald and his cousins turned around to look at her, moving away from the tree as quickly as possible. Their grins full of mischievous guilt. 

Come and set the table on the veranda, Aunt Patricia said matching their grins. 

***

It’s Christmas! Tinashe yelled at the top of his lungs. He sat upright in bed. 

I will slap you if you don’t shut up, came Grace’s sleepy voice. 

All eight cousins slept in one of the three bedrooms. It was a part of the adventure. They would spend the nights telling each other stories all through the night. Whoever had the most boring story would end up talking into the dark by themselves while everyone else snored away. Grace turned from the wall to look at Tanya, Tsitsi and Donald still covered in their blankets on the two wide inflatable beds. They were sandwiched in by Tinashe’s bed on the other side of the room. A bed Tinashe shared with Garikai, Tonderai and Dennis. 

The bed is wet! Tanya cried as she jumped off the mattress. 

She left exposed what looked like part of the map of Africa on the sheets. Tsitsi feeling exposed jumped up and yelled that it was more on Tanya’s side than hers. Donald sat-up on his inflatable mattress and dabbed his bottom to make sure none of it had escaped onto his side of the joined mattresses. Everyone but Tsitsi and Tanya laughed. The two bickered until Aunt Patricia came into the room and shut everyone up. Without another word, they all hurriedly got rid of the wet mess and washed up as they had been ordered to. 

The big moment had arrived. Breakfast was over and done with and the kitchen and dinning table were all cleaned up.

All right, I think we’re all excited to find out what we got from our secret Santa this year, Aunt Patricia announced. 

We’ll start with the young ones. Who wants to go first? 

Tinashe enthusiastically got up and walked to his wrapped gift under the tree; he had bought a gift for Aunt Gertrude. He walked over everyone’s legs to the couch and handed her his blue and green wrapped box. 

This feels a little heavy, she said. 

All eyes waited for her to unwrap her gift: a cookbook! Thank you my boy, this will encourage me to use my new kitchen. 

And so the gift unwrapping continued. Now and again it would be interrupted by whistles from under the tree. Uncle Blessing would smile at each whistle. They didn’t have to wait long to find out what that was about. 

Uncle Blessing with dramatic flare cleared his throat. 

I was excited to buy my gift because I think it’s something really special. You don’t get these just anywhere. So, Donald I hope you’ll take good care of it. 

Uncle Blessing walked over to the tree and began to pick up a box very carefully. The whistling became more frequent as he did. 

What is that? Donald’s mother asked. 

Taking care to drag out what looked like a spotted tail from under the tree, Uncle Blessing set the box down in front of Donald who looked unsure of what to do. The box was rattling frantically. The reaction among his cousins varied between Tinashe’s amazed smile and Tanya’s concerned eyebrows. 

Donald carefully unwrapped the box, afraid that whatever was jittery on the inside was going to jump out at him. The rattling stopped, but the feather tail moved ever so slightly as Donald worked his way through the wrapper, up and down, up and down. As he opened the box two beady eyes looked up at him. Its yellow almost golden head cocked up at an angle. The body was made of red, purple, turquoise and yellow feathers, so shiny and clean. It whistled. 

Whoa! Tinashe bounded over to the box and almost tipped it over. 

The bird flapped its wings. 

Blessing what is that? How is he supposed to go back with that? 

Donald’s mother was standing over him, casting a shadow into the box. Her hands on her hips and her lips pursed, she was giving the look that said, “You have to give this back.” Aunt Patricia was more concerned about how Uncle Blessing had kept a bird in a box, how long had it been in there? Aunt Gertrude was talking about the responsibility Donald would have, making sure he cleaned up the droppings and feathers. 

Oh and the smell, birds can smell, she said. 

No one else’s reaction mattered to Uncle Blessing but Donald’s. Not wanting to let his uncle down, Donald smiled and said thank you in a very small voice. The truth was he hated his gift. What was he going to do with a dumb bird? He wanted the playstation, or the awesome sword fighting kit, or even the World Guinness Book of Records that Tanya got, even that. What would he do with a bird? It’s not like it was dog he could run around with. He couldn’t try to teach it tricks like sit, or run or fetch. A bird! Who knew that it was Uncle Blessing not Aunt Gertrude who was going to be a whacky secret Santa this year. 

I couldn’t wrap this so I thought you could put it in later.

His uncle handed him a golden cage with a little latch for the lock. 

***

Donald watched his cousins play with their new gifts, Tanya rattling off about new records she was discovering on every page. Every three sentences she would start off: did you know that the Amazon is the largest rainforest in the world? Did you know that there’s a guy who can stretch his skin out to 15.8 cm? Did you know that the smallest dog is a chihuahua? 

Grace who was sitting on an easy chair on the veranda unplugged an earphone, holding her new disc player delicately in one hand, and told Tanya she was starting to sound like a chihuahua herself. 

The bird whistled next to him. The only other gift he had received was from his mother, a matching family Christmas jersey. The bird cocked its head this way and that, it could only walk forward and backward in the cage because its tail was too long to turn in any direction. Uncle Blessing had told him that it was a golden pheasant native to China. He wouldn’t say where he bought it, but he told his nephew: you can keep it like a pet chicken. Let it out during the day then put it back in its cage at night. Don’t worry about your mother, I have paperwork so you can take it with you. 

The uncle pondered his nephew with a sad look in his eyes. 

I’ve been assured that the golden pheasant lives up to its legend and brings one good fortune. Maybe it can help you figure out a way to outsmart those bullies at school. 

A little surprised that his uncle knew about his ordeals, Donald looked up at him with a weak smile. The only thing that felt worse than having to go back to that dreary cold weather, with those mean children was getting this bird for Christmas. Donald didn’t feel fortunate at all.