Replacement

We shouldn’t have been there. if I had just sat indoors with Caleb binge watching episodes of Naruto as we had planned I wouldn’t be here, in this brightly lit hospital room, my left arm in a cast, throbbing like I’d been stabbed with a thousand needles down to the bone and nurses in green scrubs who wore their hair in nets with the same tired eyes which they tried to hide behind reassuring smiles -failing woefully in my opinion- coming and going out of the room at least once every hour.

I looked around the sparsely decorated hospital room through hooded eyes, trying to block out the glare of the bulbs above me. I glanced at the window, noticing that the wooden blinds were drawn shut but I could see specks of sunlight peeking into the room. I sighed, wondering what time it was. 9am? 12pm, maybe? The room was bland and devoid of any warmth a fact further supported by the voice coming from the television playing in the background and the occasional beeping of my heart rate monitor, reminding me I was still alive. I was faintly aware of the prick from the needle stuck in my arm, pumping a clear liquid into my bloodstream and although I wasn’t certain what I was doing there, I was certain something really awful had happened yesterday.

A purple elephant standing on two feet was sat close to my bed, stroking my hair with its hand. Hand. Elephants weren’t supposed to have hands, a part of my consciousness reminded me, but I smiled leaning into the touch as I felt the thought fade from my mind along with a huge chunk of my rationality. I heard the door opening as another tired nurse -a brunette, this time around, still wearing the god-awful hospital nets, - appeared in front of it, smiling her way into my room, holding a tray.

“Darren”, she called out coming to stand beside the elephant, “it’s time for your medication.”

“mmh” I replied, smiling up at both her and the elephant. She was beautiful, with skin that resembled honey in my delirium, an oval face that reminded me of my sister’s and a much younger appearance than the previous nurses.

Reaching a hand over to swipe my good arm with a piece of cotton wool, I felt myself snap out of my delirium as the coolness of the mentholated spirit met my skin, sitting up straight as the Elephant disappeared and everything came rushing back to me. last night! Caleb! the murder! I looked at the vial on the try the nurse carried. I was sure it was a sedative. I was being sedated because they thought I was crazy. I know what I saw! they can’t tell me it didn’t happen!

“Get away from me!” I yelled pushing the nurse away from me, temporarily forgetting my left arm was shattered and falling back on the white sheets to writhe in agony as pain shot up from my left arm and spread throughout my body like a waterfall.

I heard her tray clatter on the floor and she sighed. “I need to speak with the police,” I said through gritted teeth, as the pain from my left hand blinded me. They need to know what happened last night.

“Darren, you fell from the third floor of your apartment building while dancing with your friend.” she said in exasperation, gathering the fallen supplies, “I’m here to give you painkillers.”

I looked at her in confusion. “I didn’t fall, I jumped”, I said as images of the night before flashed in my mind and my eyes widened, “and Caleb was murdered. I need to speak with the police.”

She shook her head in pity and came to stand by my side. taking my good hand in both her hands -a gesture which I was sure was meant to be reassuring, but wasn’t- and smiling, she said, “Darren, Caleb was the one who brought you to the hospital. he has been sitting at the reception since you came in here.”

“what?” I asked incredulously, furrowing my brows in confusion. it didn’t make sense. Caleb was dead. I knew because I had seen him die.

We had gone to the Walmart in my neighborhood to get a pack of mountain dew, a few beers -for him- and some chocolates to get us through the night at my insistence as I was a shameless caffeine addict and I had run out of material. while we did go to the Walmart, he didn’t enter the supermarket with me, stopping to wait for me at a corner of the parking lot, just outside the building, saying he had to take a smoke and really wasn’t in the mood. So I went in alone. as I moved around the mart, picking up our items I could still see him standing in the dimly lit parking lot, -a cigarette in one hand and the other hand in the pocket of his khakI cargo shorts- through the windows overlooking the parking lot. I did lose sight of him though, as I went to cash out our drinks but I thought nothing of it, assuming he had probably gone to take a piss or something.

Stepping out of the building, bags in hands, I stood at the corner of the parking lot where I saw him and waited for him to finish whatever it was he was doing so we could go home. there was nothing particularly special about the night, my girlfriend, Emile had traveled to go see her parents in Australia and his was working the night shift at her job so we decided to have a boy’s night in, something we hadn’t done in a while. I glanced at my watch, the led screen read 8:30 pm. sighing I pulled my phone out my pocket and dialed his number, making my way towards the restrooms located a few walks away from the main building. he had been gone for more than twenty minutes not counting the time I stood outside waiting for him. he answered on the second ring and I proceeded to voice out my irritation at his disappearance.

“Where the fuck are you, man?” I snapped into phone

“What do you think? I’m taking a piss. I can hear you from in here you know”, he laughed, proceeding to step out of the restroom. I glared at him as he approached, stomping out the cigarette when he was a few meters away from me.

“You’re good now?” I asked him, the irritation still evident in my voice.

“Yeah,” he said wearing an amused smile on his face.

“Good,” I said, pushing the second of the bags in my hands to him.

He stared at me blankly.

“What? there’s no way I’m getting these bags alone.”

Caleb suddenly burst out laughing. “dude, you really need to cut back on the caffeine. how long has it been? twelve hours? and you’re already suffering withdrawal symptoms” he teased as he collected the bag I held out for him and I stuck my free hand in my hoodie pocket.

he was one to talk.

“Right after you quit smoking,” I retorted as we made our way out of the premises.

We had gotten into a debate about who should quit what that we didn’t notice we were being followed. Caleb made a comment about me dying from a caffeine-induced heart attack and stopped to laugh his head off about it while I flipped him a bird and continued walking down the street feigning offence, his unrestrained laughter breaking out around us.

He was like that. he’d make a stupid joke about death and laugh about it even when it lacked the actual humor. I turned to yell at him when I was a few yards away to knock it off when I saw it, a figure approaching Caleb’s hunched over form.

In the warm glow of the street light, I had assumed it was just a regular passer-by until I noticed it get directly behind Caleb, fishing out a knife from somewhere beyond my sight and swiftly plunging it into the side of his neck before I could get my words out. I watched in horror as Caleb let go of the bag, gripping his neck with wide eyes and a look of confusion before crumpling to the ground, the bag he carried hitting the ground with such force that a couple of beer cans burst open at the impact, contents mixing with the growing pool of blood where my friend stood seconds ago. he didn’t see his assailant.

My first instinct was to run and help him, but like a deer caught in the headlights, my body maintained a rigid stance. the figure then proceeded to bend over his crumpled lifeless form and pulled out the knife slowly, maintaining the same precision as he methodically it plunged it into Caleb’s chest, pulling it out and repeating the motion several times-as one might stab a steak-,each time taking it’s time to plunge the knife deeper as if savoring every push.

I had a feeling it knew I was there and would be coming for me next. on cue, it raised its head to look at me momentarily, feral eyes as dark as the night carved into a gaunt looking face met mine. I couldn’t make out much of its features as it was covered head to toe in black but the leering smile it showed me seem to say “you’re right, enjoy the show for now,” before it continued its gruesome task. the pool of blood on the ground ever increasing.

I gripped my shopping bag tighter. My mind churned, I felt bile rising in my throat as my lunch threatened to dislodge from my stomach. what was going on? I was suddenly aware of how lonely the street seemed despite the row of houses and apartment complexes on each side. where was everybody? my eyes darted to the windows of the buildings around us where thankfully, the lights were turned on in more than a half of them. surely someone had to be seeing this, peeping behind a closed curtain maybe.

Looking back at the horror which played out before me, I willed my legs to move, to carry me away from there but my body would not allow it. The figure then leapt to its feet and sprang in my direction. my feet were off the ground slower than I would I liked but I was running as adrenaline pumped through my veins, propelling me forward and away from my pursuer. my apartment building was about 5 blocks away and as I ran the usually short distance, my mind screamed at its sudden length.

I needed to call the police.

I needed an ambulance

Caleb!

I felt my muscles burn as I flew up the stairs in an attempt to put much distance between myself and the thing that killed Caleb. stealing a glance behind me, I noticed it was no longer behind me but pushed myself further to get to the safety of my apartment. with shaky hands and adrenaline still pumping through my veins, I swiped the key card and the door opened with a soft click. I’d never been so grateful to hear it. letting myself into the dark apartment, I made to close it when its hand pushed the door in an attempt to open it. I wasn’t a strong person, but I couldn't bear the thought of being caught by the thing which had murdered my friend. Throwing my weight against the door, I tried to push it shut against the pressure of its hand. Pushing harder as I slammed the door shut on its hand caught in the open space between the frame and the door. it let out a hiss which I wrongly assumed was an indication of pain before flinging the door open with far more strength than I expected given its gaunt appearance.

With the knife held high above its head it lunged at me, feral eyes beaming with unsettling glee probably at the prospect of plunging the knife into my flesh. I moved back, narrowly avoiding the tip of the knife, and falling on my butt bringing what I think must have been my coffee table crashing down with me. Amidst the darkness, the light from the street below illuminated my balcony and seeped into my dark apartment offering a little visibility. I could see it stood at the opposite end of the room from where I had fallen, watching me. getting on my feet I made for the balcony, resolved to jump before the thing could get me. we weren’t far up-I lived on the 3rd floor-and I reckoned I could get away and call the police. As I scrambled towards the balcony, I heard its footsteps slowly approach me, closing the distancing between us. without a second thought I was over the railing and falling, curling myself up in a now confirmed failed attempt at protecting my arm judging from the position of my arm in the cast.

I don’t remember much after the jump; my memory feels like pieces of rags joined together haphazardly. I don’t know how long I stayed on the ground but I vaguely remember the wail of sirens and then I was being lifted up into a vehicle and I remember screaming that Caleb was hurt. I remember feeling warm soon afterwards, but thinking about it now and judging from my elephant episode, I think it was the sedatives.

Turning to the beautiful brunette nurse, I smiled as best I could amidst my throbbing left arm, “I’m sorry. please carry on.”

She sighed, giving my hand a squeeze before turning to get the needle and another batch of cotton wool. I lay there, thinking about how possible it was that Caleb was alive when I had seen what I did. Maybe it was all in my head, the excess caffeine in my system sending me to overdrive. like Caleb said, I really should cut back on my caffeine intake. I chuckled, causing the needle the nurse held to my skin to move a little. I winced a bit before relaxing.

“Hey, can I see him now?” I blurted, “Caleb.”

she pulled the needle out and pressed a small wad of cotton wool against the wound made by it. “yes, but only for a while. I’ll let him know.”

“Thanks,” I breathed as she walked out of the room.

Moments later she returned with a man I did not recognize, smiling as she ushered in the stranger with Caleb’s face wearing the same khaki cargo shorts and a checkered blue shirt. I furrowed my brows in confusion, “who’s this?” I inquired, looking from her to the stranger.

He burst out laughing, that same unrestrained manner as Caleb before looking me in the eye, “it’s me dude. Caleb” he stated, as if daring me to say otherwise.

I stared in horror as I recognized the eyes. Caleb’s sharp bight eyes were gone, feral dark eyes now occupying their sockets. they were its eyes.

My mind was spinning and I suddenly felt very dizzy as I watched it exchange a few words with the nurse who blushed furiously at something it said before turning to leave us both alone. Caleb was dead and this thing had taken his place. it’s why nobody would believe me

“You are a fake,” I whispered more to myself than to it when we were alone.

It sat on the couch beside my bed, crossing one leg over the other, “you can’t prove that,” it taunted, face contorting into the leering smile from yesterday.

so it was real. I hadn’t imagined it.

“I’m going to let the police know you murdered him”.

it cackled, “let them know what? that you are a caffeine addict who fell off his balcony while dancing as he hung out with his friend? you can’t prove it because Caleb is here. it said, stressing the here, “he brought you to the hospital.”

“Where is Caleb?” I asked

“I’m over here dude,” it replied, gesturing to itself in an imitation of Caleb’s voice

“No. where is Caleb?

“Dead,” it replied in an unsettling calm voice which filled me with dread.

I felt my heart drop to my stomach as the feeling spread over me

“Oh, don’t look so gloom,” it said maliciously, sitting up straighter in the chair which it occupied, “we are going to have so much fun together.”

The blood drained from my face. This thing killed my friend and took his face, leaving no trace of his existence and I was left with no way to prove it except my memory.