Danny

My eyelids fluttered open to a dim, sickly sort of lighting. My body ached terribly, and my head swam. Where am I? I thought to myself. I winced from the stinging pain in my back as I lifted myself off the canvas cot. The room was small and dirty. I could see the light streaming in from a crack between the floor and wall. It was cold which only made me feel all the more uncomfortable. As I took a step forward, my body trembled and my head reeled. I stepped in front of the half-shattered mirror hanging on the door. The person I saw was not one that I recall ever seeing before. A young man, in his late teens, stood before me. He had curly blonde hair, a tall, slender physique, and a bloody bandage wrapped around his forehead. I stumbled back in surprise. The boy in the mirror did so too. I lifted my arms and let them fall to my side. The boy in the mirror did so too. I gasped. Could it be that the boy in the mirror is me! I reached up and ran my fingertips across my forehead which was covered with the crusty bandage. My head throbbed as I thought hard upon the thousands of questions racing through my brain. I searched for a memory, a thought, just a glimpse of my past. How did I get here? I wondered. I didn’t have the slightest idea of who I was. I was scared. Putting these thoughts aside momentarily, I gently peeled the bandage off of my forehead. A nasty cut surrounded by a purple bruise spanned from my left eyebrow up to my hairline. What happened to me? Do I want to know?

    I heard a noise coming from the next room. Cautiously, I turned the doorknob and peered out. A stained couch stood in the corner across from an old television set. The ceiling swayed, dipped, and cracked. The only source of light was the broken window sealed with saran wrap and duct tape. I saw no sign of people anywhere. Slowly, I stepped out of my room. The filthy carpet crunched beneath my bare feet making my skin crawl. 

    “Danny!” I heard a woman’s voice exclaim. 

    I turned to see a hefty, middle-aged woman staring at me in utter surprise. 

    “I didn’t think you would ever wake!” She ran to me and threw her arms around me. 

    I hadn’t a clue who this woman was. I assumed she was my mother, but I was hesitant to accept her embrace. “Mother?” I asked meekly.

    She pulled away and looked at me with an inquisitive gleam. “ Danny, don’t you know who I am?” 

    I stood looking into her eyes with my brows knit. I searched every corner of my mind, but I did not know this woman. “I don’t remember anything.” 

    She gasped and cupped her face in her hands. “It can’t be.” She reached out and brushed my cheek with her gentle touch. “You don’t remember the accident?” 

    “What happened to me? Who am I? Where is my family? Do I even have one?” I began to become hysterical. My head spun. 

    “Sit down Danny.” She directed me to the couch. “I won’t pressure you with too much knowledge, but you need to know this.” 

    I sat uncomfortably on the edge of the sofa. The smell of it was enough to make me gag. 

    “Three days ago you and your family were in a terrible accident. You suffered a serious head injury, but the others didn’t make it.” She reached over and took my hand. “I’m your Aunt Lily. Everything will be alright.”

    My head stung and flashes of my memory were webbing back together in a way that hurt worse than my physical pain. The blood, everywhere. Sirens and screaming filled my ears. “No more!” I shuddered. “Don’t! Don’t tell me anymore.”

    “I know it hurts hun.” She cradled me in her arms. “You just need time now.” 

    The memories that flooded in so quickly began to recede like the ocean’s tide, and for this, I was very grateful. Nothing from my past life came back to me gently. It all rushed in biting and rippling like a cold breeze. I know now that my name is Danny, and I am alone. 

    The sun is low in the sky now. I sit on the old sofa analyzing the sunset from the broken window. The reds and the pinks seem to paint vivid pictures in my head of people I ought to know and places I ought to be. I have learned that this trailer is my inheritance from my parents, as I am the only child. I know not what their names are, nor what they looked like. I do not wish to be told such. I’ve been informed that my name is Danny York. I am 18 years old. I have graduated High School, and work as a cashier at the local market. That is all I need to know, and all I want to know. 

Aunt Lily is leaving me tomorrow. Though she wishes to stay, I urged her to leave me alone with my thoughts. I wonder if I’ve always lived like this? The trailer is barely livable, dirty, and damaged. The shower has cracks in the bottom where rodents and weeds have crept through. The toilet and the sink are yellowed with age and filth. The walls are as porous as a sponge allowing the cold night air to seep in. If this is the result of what I’ve been doing for the past 18 years, I don’t want to know exactly what that is. Food is scarce here and the water is recycled sewage. 

“You seem unusually quiet.” Says Aunt Lily beside me on the couch.”

“Oh really? Do I talk a lot normally?” I ask.

She laughs. “That’s an understatement. I’ve never known such a chatterbox as little Danny.”

“Little? I am a man, Aunt Lily.” I say feeling a bit irritated by the remark. 

“Oh, not to me. I remember when you were just a little tyke. Running around with that mop of curly white hair bouncing. You’ve brought the family a lot of joy.” She says reaching up and pulling on a strand of my unruly hair. 

My heart sinks. I wish I could relive all the memories I surely have made. I don’t want to be told these things. I want my memories back, the way I remember them. I lay my head over on the arm of the couch and fall into a deep sleep. No dreams play like movies in my mind tonight. No memories unfold as I rest my eyes and revive my brain. Like a clean slate, I’m offered a fresh start. Tomorrow I shall begin my new life and relearn myself. No memories will tie me down, nor grievances hold me back.