I wake up sitting on the floor with my legs crossed in complete disorienting darkness.
In the distance I see a flickering light.
But where am I? what was I doing? I am wearing a long sleeved t shirt, shorts, and some sneakers.
It feels as if it’s empty space all around me, moderately cold, and nothing but that flickering light. I walk towards it, it’s further away then I originally thought shivering as I move closer I realize that it is a flame by how it shifts side to side and sways as if there was a small draft. Interestingly it isn’t getting bigger, it still looks the same size as when I first saw it. Suddenly I start feeling warmth from its direction, it feels nice. As I get closer the feeling gets warmer and warmer but remains the same shape. As I get even closer the flickering stops and it’s dead still. I reach for it out of something beyond myself, and it rests in my hand just millimeters from my skin floating in my palm. It’s hot but not unbearably so, my eyes shimmer as I can see a semi glossy reflection in the flame. The flame starts to flicker and move about as a gust of cold wind rushes through me, but the flame feels hotter. I am mesmerized by this light, almost as I have been blessed to witness something so spectacular. My gaze stays locked on the flame I can’t even explain how content and hopeful I feel. The flame burns brighter and larger still resting just above the skin of my palm. Until the flame seems to have caught my sleeve and quickly runs up my arm, but I don’t panic because it isn’t burning me but I feel warmth as it quickly engulfs my entire shirt. As it burns through the bottom of my shirt, my shorts catch on fire and the flame surrounds my legs, arms, and the fire reaches up my neckline and envelopes my head and face. I am completely on fire I think to myself. As the flame increases in vibrancy my vision becomes veiled firstly by white light. Until utterly blinded by a harsh white light I feel my body begin to feel light and lifting off of the ground, losing consciousness, I can’t speak, and I can’t see, I can’t move my arms, and I can’t hear, complete white silence. I struggle to stay awake, until finally I give in, it feels nice to close me eyes. I wake up sitting in a large throne like chair, fully covered in metal old rusted fifteenth century knight armor, with a sword grasped in my right hand tightly. I am in a large room almost cathedral like with three giant pillars on each side and at the end of the hall above a large church door, is a rusty metal square clock with no numbers just two hands. Im just sitting not wanting to move. I wait in this chair for what feels like days, weeks, then months the light outside the window never changing to day. I watch that clock cycle over and over again. Until one day a man enters through that front door, fully armored like me, his face veiled by his helmet, grasping a sword in his right hand, I feel the need to get up, so I do. The man suddenly charges at me with that sword wielded with both hands. I feel need to rush him as well, as he reaches me he swings his sword horizontally in a slashing motion, I use my sword and meet it vertically. A loud clank echoes through the hall. He pushes with all his might and I return the pressure. Why do I know how to do this? I wondered to myself. Also I seem strong? The man pushes with all his might. I gather some strength and overpower him to the floor.
This man brings danger to me, so I don’t hesitate, I stand over top of him, he struggles and seems disoriented, and I stab him in the chest between clasps of his armor. He lays lifeless for a minute, until his body completely disintegrates into nothing but air. I don’t feel accomplished, I feel sad of what transpired, why was that man here, and why did he wish me harm?
I walk back to the throne and sit, not wanting to move, days pass, then weeks, until a man shows up at the door again. It couldn’t be the same man, although his armor is exact. He is wielding a different sword, but does the exact same thing and charges me, I retaliate as I did before, the result the same, I over power him and stab him in the chest, his body disintegrates. I feel sad, and worry of what my place is in this role that I have been positioned into. Days would pass, and in between the same man, in the same armor with a different sword every time shows up to that door. His fate remains the same, over and over again.
Until a day where a man shows up, wielding a different sword as usual, but wearing a darker colored rusted armor. spikes thrust from the shoulders, a sinister helm with long horns jutting and looping like a ram. This man rushes me the same as the men before him, but when our blades clash, a force suddenly pushes from us like a shockwave, I don’t feel as strong, his force is pushing me back, I plant my feet in a more steady position, he overwhelms me with his strength and knocks me to the floor. He stands over me, arrogant, cavalier, and triumphant. Stabs me in the chest, his sword melted through my armor.
I feel satisfied, happy even, then that bright white light I saw when I was first engulfed in the flame fills my vision. Piercing my eyes as before, my arms unable to move again, I can’t hear, and I can’t see. Then I abruptly open my eyes to the same dark room from before, cold, disoriented, wearing the same long T-shirt and shorts with sneakers,I feel for my chest and don’t feel a wound, nothing but darkness in the room except for a flickering light in the distance.
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Great story Jeremy, keep it up.
Thank you I hope to refine my story telling with each prompt.
Love your use of the prompt. Congrats on your first story.
Thanks so much !
Jeremy: Congratulations on your first story entry here on Reedsy. I commend you on the courage it takes to put your work out there. I am fairly new to Reedsy, also, and know how important positive feedback is, e specially as a newbie. I usually don't criticize at all, but I will break my personal rule to share with you what someone thankfully shared with me near the beginning. WHITE SPACE They advised me to consider breaking longer paragraphs into shorter ones, maybe with only four or five sentences each. The kind suggestion was to he...
Oh wow I really do appreciate that, this is definitely different for me and I really appreciate you giving me tips and whatnot and I will implement those things next time ! And also for demonstrating exactly what you are saying