I Spy With My Little Eye a... Spy?

Agent Connors

Time: 19:01

Location: Jessica and James Jordan’s Wedding Reception

“When we get married, promise me one thing?” Angela asked me.

“What?”

She held the petal of a dying lily in her hand. “Do not use the same florist as Jessica and James. I mean seriously? What did these flowers do to deserve death?”

“Twelve counts of premeditated murder,” I said.

“Damn,” she smiled, “remind me not to mess with them.”

“You got it, babe.”

Angela surfed the reception’s endless white-clothed tables until she found the one that had her name written on a golden invitation. “Assigned seating really should have stayed in the seventh grade,” she said as she sat down. “I feel like a child.”

I took a seat next to her and she continued. “Now I get to spend the night sitting next to losers.” Angela glanced up at me, realized the error of her words, and threw me a quick smile. She reached for my hand. “And you, babe. The losers and you.”

“Nice save.”

“Okay, but you get what I mean right? I’m the bride’s sister.”

“Who ruined her last wedding by setting a dance floor on fire?”

“My moves do kinda get wild—but that’s not my point! I should be sitting next to her with the bridesmaids, not sitting next to…” Angela picked up the golden invitation next to her. “Richard Dickson. I feel like that’s a fake name.”

“No, he’s actually James’ estranged uncle that once ate a cat.”

“You really do your research, huh?”

I grinned. “I try my best to be prepared and not set people on fire, thank you very much.”

“So you just know everyone at this wedding? Despite being my plus one and having no relations with them?”

“The Internet is marvelous with its random, personal information. I don’t need to know someone to know someone.”

“Alright,” Angela licked her lips and surveyed the glittering hotel ballroom. “How about him?”

I squinted at an old woman in a feathery dress that Angela pointed at. “Maggie Rivers. Jessica’s mother’s cranny neighbor. Her mom made her invite her just to upstage her.”

“Damn. Oh, him.”

Angela pointed at a tiny child with fists fall of shrimp. When he thought no one was looking, he stole more from the buffet tables and shoved it down his pants. “Jimmy McJackson. He’s the nephew of the wedding planner—couldn’t find a babysitter in time. Ironically allergic to shrimp so I’m not sure what his master plan is.”

Devilishly rubbing her hands together, Angela said, “Alright there’s gotta be someone here you don’t know. Some mysterious, last minute, plus one.” She smirked. “Him.”

“That’s the best man, Daniels? He’s known for insanely long speeches. Remember has it Jessica even brought a timer just to limit him.”

“No, not him. The guy next to him.”

She pointed at a striking man  with a large chin scar in a purple suit. I dry swallowed. “Nope… I umm… I’ve never seen him before in my entire life,” I lied.

With a dopey grin, Angela grabbed my hand and dragged me over to meet him. “Hello~!” She sang, over eagerly waving hello.

“Oh, hello,” the man with a chin scar said to Angela, but his eyes fixed on me. Like he was trying to place me in his memories. His eyes widened when he did.

Angela noticed. “Are you sure you two don’t know each other?”

“Absolutely positive,” he lied with a smile that said you could trust him with your secrets. Your classified by the country, top secrets. “I’m Matthew.”

“Kimmy. Well, it was nice meeting you,” I said, then turned around and retreated. I took Angela with me and away from that sociopath.

God, why was he here? What’s his angle? My eyes darted around. Something’s wrong. It’s gotta be for him to be here.

***

Agent Lincoln

Time: 19:12

Location: Jessica and James Jordan’s Wedding Reception

It wasn’t for the years of training, I would have certainly been worried. Instead, a familiar cold calm flooded my body.

So, Agent Connors was here. I took a slow sip from my drink. I hadn’t seen her since the Amazon Affair. Or was the Cambodian Incident last?

One thing is for certain, if she’s here, then I lose my day off. Her presence means bad news for my employers. Agent Connors works for their rivals. Too often she spoils my missions and I spoil hers.

If she’s here, she’s probably part of some mission I’m not aware of. How diabolic to get invited as the bride's sister’s girlfriend. No one would suspect a thing. Except me that is.

I smirked. Nothing gets past me. Now, I just have to find out what she's up to and stop it.

“Hey, Matthew, are you doing okay there?”

Zack—the best man, groom’s best friend, and my brother—my shoulder to snap me out of my mind. “Doing great, man.”

“Good, because I need your help. Anytime I start talking about Amanda—“ His ex-girlfriend that dumped him a week before the wedding. Hence why I’m his plus one. “—I need you to stop me or… or slap me. Yeah. It’s just been so hard and I…” Tears welled in his eyes. “I miss her so much. Her smile. Her hair that smiled like mangoes. God I love mangoes!” He choked.

I slapped him.

Softly rubbing his cheek, Zack said, “Thanks man. I just can’t stop thinking about her, ya know?”

Oh, I know. I can’t stop thinking about Agent Connors and what her plan could be.

My eyes narrowed at Agent Connors from across the room. She seemed to be hovering around that wedding cake an awful lot… hmmm… what is she up to?

***

Agent Connors

Time: 19:17

Location: Jessica and James Jordan’s Wedding Reception

“Are you sure you don’t know Matthew? Because he hasn’t taken his eyes off you once.”

“Totally.”

Angela frowned. “Kimmy, if he’s an ex or something, you can just tell me. I won’t get jealous I promise. We can always leave early if he’s making you uncomfortable.” She took a swig of champagne. It’s not like my sister will miss me.”

“He’s not an ex. And everything is fine.”

“Really? Because you’ve been sniffing that cake for the past three minutes.”

I looked at the cake beside me. Five glorious tiers of vanilla with a light buttercream frosting. Sugary flowers climbed up every side of it. Rumor has it Jesscia’s old best friend from high school works as a pastry chef in France and flew it in for her. God, I couldn’t wait to get a taste.

“I know about that huge sweet tooth of yours and how sweets calm you down,” Angela said. “So what’s going on?”

“Nothing.” I lead her away from the cake and away from Agent Lincoln’s gaze. “Nothing.”

At least, hopefully, nothing. As long as I foil whatever Agent Lincoln’s plan is then I get back to enjoying my day off with my girlfriend.

***

Agent Lincoln

Time: 19:30

Location: Jessica and James Jordan’s Wedding Reception

They ran out of shrimp at the buffet, so when they called my table over to get dinner, I had to get cod inside. I pushed the lump of weird-smelling fish to the side of my plate. Disgusting.

My attention shifted from the plate when Zack stood up and tapped his champagne glass with his fork. “I would like to make a toast. To the wonderful bride and groom, he smiled at Jessica and James—but they already looked bored with him.

“Look at you James, all grown up,” Zack continued, “I remember when we were kids and you were this tiny…”

As Zack continued his speech, my ears picked up on something else. Was that… ticking?

***

Agent Connors

Time: 19:32

Location: Jessica and James Jordan’s Wedding Reception

Look at that lucky jerk.

I squeezed my fork and glared at Agent Lincoln. He sat at the main table with the bride and groom—with that beautiful masterpiece of a cake behind him. He was definitely going to get a good slice. Dammit!

Wait a minute. I squinted. Why is he getting up from his chair? And during toasts? He’s moving toward the cake… oh no! That guy is not messing with the cake.

Quietly and without drawing attention to myself, I got up from my chair and stalked my way through the minefield of tables and chairs across the ballroom.

Whatever he’s up to, he’s not getting away with it.

***

Agent Lincoln

Time: 19:35

Location: Jessica and James Jordan’s Wedding Reception

Agent Connors spent a lot of time beside this cake earlier. She was definitely checking it out. Plus that ticking… no… it can’t be. Could the cake be a bomb?

I swiveled back around to see Agent Connors speed walking her way towards me. Crap. She’s onto me. I ducked behind the humongous cake out of sight of the rest of the guests. The ticking was getting quicker.

I needed to get the bomb out of the cake and out of the hotel. I don’t know what Agent Connors was planning to achieve with the bomb, but I won’t let it ruin my brother’s best friend’s wedding. After rolling up my suit’s sleeves—because it’s a rental—I plunged my hands into the cake.

***

Agent Connors

Time: 19:37

Location: Jessica and James Jordan’s Wedding Reception

NOT THE CAKE!!!! I dove at Agent Lincoln with his dumb man hands inside the cake and tackled him. We landed on the ground in a bruised bunch. As our limbs flailed, I struggled to pin him. I held his slimy cake hands above his head and demanded, “Just what were you doing to that cake, Agent Lincoln!”

“What I was doing? What about you!”

His foot found my stomach and he kicked me back. My body banged against the cake, knocking it over. In slow motion, I watched it fall in grace and spatter across the floor. I fell to my knees. “It was too beautiful for this world,” I whispered.

Beside me, Agent Lincoln scrambled to his feet and rushed to the fallen cake. Yet again, he shoved his hands into the cake crumbs, desperately searching for something. “Have respect for the dead,” I said.

“Where is it? Where is it? I can hear the ticking.”

Before I could ask him what he was going on about, a shriek from the bride erupted behind me. “What happened!!”

Slowly, I turned around gulped. The bride’s entire table was on their feet and staring at us, slack-jawed. Oops.

From my left, Angela’s clicking heels approached me. “Kimmy, what the hell are you doing?” She demanded.

Like ways, the best man asked Agent Lincoln, “What the actual fuck are you doing, Zack?”

“The ticking… the ticking,” he chanted. “I can’t find it. We all need to get out of here.”

“The ticking? You mean from this?” The best man held up a cute chicken timer. “Jessica was timing my speech.”

Ticking? Searching? What did he think I planted a bomb in the cake or something?

Oh my god, he thinks I planted a bomb in the cake.

I face palmed. If he was suspecting I was up to something when I wasn’t, that means he wasn’t working on his own mission like I thought. Neither of us was.

He seemed to realize the same because finally, Agent Lincoln relaxed and said, “Oh.” He glanced down at the mess before him. “I formally apologize for my behavior.” He stood and wiped the cake from his pants. “I was completely out of line. Please, continue with the toast.”

“It’s ruined. It’s all ruined,” Jessica whimpered with tears in her eyes. “The cake. The reception. The wedding… We sacrificed our dream honeymoon for this wedding and now…”

The best man pointed towards the door. “You should go, Matthew.”

With a grim nod, Agent Lincoln silently got up and left.

Now it was my turn to get yelled at. “What’s going on with you, Kimmy,” Angela asked.

“Nothing, I swear.”

“Really?” Her voice broke and her eyes shined with fresh tears. “Because it doesn’t look like that. I may not know what the truth is, but I know you’re not telling it.”

And with that, her clicking heels turned and stormed away from me.

***

“Wait!” I said as I grabbed the sleeve of Angela’s dress. She had already made it outside by the time I snapped out of shock and reached her.

“What is it?” She turned to face me and wiped a tear from her eye.

“Angela, I’m sorry.”

“About lying to me or the cake?”

“Is it wrong if I say both?”

She scowled. 

“About you, of course,” I said.

“If you’re really sorry, then tell me the truth. What was going on with you and Matthew? Why were you fighting? And no lying this time.”

I bit my lip. “You were right. He’s my ex-boyfriend. Our relationship didn’t end well so I didn't want to tell you.”

Angela seemed to relax a little about the lie, so I relaxed. It’s better she doesn’t know so no one from the office comes to kill her. “Next time can you just tell me? And not lie to my face?”

I peeled up. “So there’s gonna be a next time?”

She sighed. “I don’t know. I don’t like being lied to. I need time to think about this.” Then for the second time, that day, she walked away. “Maybe I’ll call you later.”

Maybe. I could take a maybe. Especially when lying to Angela keeps her safe. I’d rather have her hate me than have to bury her.

***

Agent Lincoln

Time: 19:58

Location: Jessica and James Jordan’s Wedding Reception

“I need this yesterday, Vinny. Do you think you can deliver?” I asked.

“Sure thing, Lincoln,” Vinny’s voice cracked over the phone. “I can get it in five.”

“See you then.” I snapped the phone shut and glanced back at the hotel’s front entrance. I sighed.

Overheard, the stars looked down at me, but even they looked disappointed.

“We both screwed up, huh?” Agent Connors sauntered over to me. I lowered into a fighting stance. “Woah, relax. I’m not here to fight you.”

I didn’t relax. You wouldn’t relax around a venomous snake, you shouldn’t relax around Agent Connors. “My girlfriend might dump me. That’s kind of up in the air. The best looked pissed at you. So that’s fun.”

I straightened out my suit’s collar. “We’ll see about that.”

Agent Connors raised a curious eyebrow. “And what do you mean by that, Agent Lincoln?”

Above us, a helicopter slowly descented. “That.”

Our hair whipped around our faces until they finally made the blades stop spinning. Once they did, two guys in suits hopped out. Now, Agent Connors was the one in a fighting stance.

To her obvious surprise, the men pulled out a ten tier wedding cake with two plane tickets sticking out the top instead of a bride and groom. Sprinting across the parking lot, they carried the cake inside to the reception. I smiled to myself. “Did you do that?” Agent Connors asked. 

“Yes.”

“How?”

“I have a few friends that own me favors. My line of work does come with some perks. So I got Jessica and James a new cake and tickets to a prepaid honeymoon in Hawaii. I figured they should be enough to even out tonight’s disaster. I’ll see you next time, Agent Connors. Don’t think I’ll go easy on you.”

She smiled. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”