Contest #147 winner 🏆

139 comments

Fiction Horror Crime

This story contains sensitive content

*Content warning- some violence and gore*


Something is eating the hostas.


It’s a tricky section of the garden- shaded and north-facing- but the foliage thrives under my watchful eye. I ensure it grows lush and verdant, and only I can coax it from sulking in this hot, dry weather. I’m pleased to see the blue-green tones of sieboldiana flourishing beside the golden variegated undulates leaves.


I‘m outraged by the pock-marked damage I’ve discovered, and search for the culprit amongst the ovate leaves. There! A snail clings to the underside of a leaf, sucked close in a non-consensual and greedy kiss. I prise it off and the shell implodes in my pincer grip, crushed mush oozing between my fingertips. I discard the muck onto the soil with disdain, satisfied that feeder has now become food.


A gardener must be brutal, constantly battling soft bodied grubs, mandible-fanged pests, plagues of aphids and creeping insidious blight, all in order to protect the precious shoots and trembling new leaves. She must also have a hard, calculating heart to destroy what was previously nurtured, cutting back and curbing life when the time comes, sacrificing what was once so carefully created. I, the gardener, am like God; through me nature flows, giving vigour to the strong and enabling the weak and damaged to pass.


Inside the house the landline telephone clamours, taking seven rings for Mrs Nolan to stir from her armchair doze and mobilise her arthritic joints to answer it. Crouched here beneath the open kitchen window I am perfectly placed to eavesdrop what she says.


“Hello, this is Miriam…


“Oh, I’m as well as can be expected. And you?


“Yes, a very hot spell. The garden’s very thirsty…


“Oh…really? You’re too kind! Honestly, it’s too much…


“It’s an absolute honour. I can’t quite take it all in. Trevor would have been so pleased. So very, very pleased…


“Thank you ever so much. It’s all such a surprise!


“I certainly will, and you too. Cheerio.”


The telephone pings as it’s replaced in its cradle, and I sense Mrs Nolan shuffling along to the back door to find me. I muse over the emotional wobble I overheard in her voice. She’s been prone to tears since Mr Nolan’s unfortunate accident and numerous well meaning villagers have phoned to offer comfort, but this call was a curious one and I’m keen to be enlightened.


“Mercy, are you there?”


“Right over here, Mrs Nolan.” I sound as sweet as maple syrup.


Mrs Nolan emerges from the side of the house, blinking in the bright sunshine, taking a moment to locate me by the shadowy border.


“I’ve had the most remarkable news, Mercy. The Village Committee have nominated me for the Best Blooming Garden award. How kind of them! I’m sure it’s Trevor’s dahlias that persuaded the judges; he took such meticulous care of them. Trevor deserved the nomination, not me- he’d have been so proud- but it’s too late…”


Both Mrs Nolan and I glance involuntarily to the place on the lawn where Mr Nolan was found. I am pleasantly surprised to notice how prolifically the daisies are growing. They’re clearly thriving from minerals in Mr Nolan’s blood.


Here we go. Mrs Nolan’s eyes are welling up and her chin is wobbling. I stand, knit my eyebrows together with a show of concern and gently usher her back indoors to put the kettle on.


That’s when I know there is no hope left for Mrs Nolan. A well-meaning nomination- probably from sympathy votes- has exacerbated her misery and reduced her to convulsive weeping, proving any pleasure in life is now well beyond her grasp. What particularly irks me is that the dahlias were mostly attended to by myself, at least ever since Mr Nolan’s stroke last year, and I’ve exclusively cared for them since his recent demise. The dahlias, the roses, those blousy, vulgar petunias that Mrs Nolan chose and I obediently bedded in- the nomination is all thanks to me.


The world has no place for the old and feeble. In this very garden, right under our noses, nature uses all manner of macabre means to ensure order is kept; pincers, stingers, poisons, parasites that eat their host slowly from within. Although violent, these acts are essentially a great kindness. A kindness Mrs Nolan now deserves.


*


I ponder my options.


Whilst some impulsivity was involved with Mr Nolan, this time I'll carefully consider my plan.


Not to say last time wasn’t efficient and effective.


I’d taken great care that afternoon to prune the privet hedge to perfection. I was clearing away the cuttings- gloved, as the sap can sting- whilst Mr Nolan limped up and down, pedantically questioning some cross branch irregularities he perceived in the shrubs. I pitied him, unable as he was to appreciate my work and no longer able to manage the shears himself with one useless arm. It was the least I could do to relieve him of his agitation once and for all.


Stepping close, I plunged the points of the shears into his fleshy, cotton-shirted paunch, which gave little more resistance than a fish belly, and slid the blades upwards under his ribs. It was remarkably easy. This single moment of pain was all it took to free him from his frustrated, failing body. A poppy-crimson stain blossomed under his spread fingers as he clutched his gut in a futile attempt to hold back the seeping blood. Before my eyes his pallid face became slack-jawed with disbelief. He gurgled and spluttered, eyes bulging pleadingly, but there was nothing left to be said. As he staggered, I gently grasped him by the shoulders and guided him down to the ground face first, so the blade tips emerged through his back like fresh new shoots.


It looked every bit the tragic accident; the clumsy fall of a foolish man carrying tools he couldn’t handle, when he should have left the work for the gardener. I removed the remaining cuttings under the pretence I’d left much earlier, and left him for Mrs Nolan to find after she returned from the Parish cake sale.


Perhaps a similarly violent end for Mrs Nolan would be fitting. I’m briefly excited by the thought of her pale wrists cut to scarlet ribbons by secateurs- driven to suicide by grief, of course. I suspect the bleeding out could take some time and given the neighbours' windows will be wide open in the summer heat, enabling them to hear her screams, maybe this is an unwise option.


A fall on the patio? I think of Mrs Nolan’s head as the snail shell crushed between my fingers and wonder if one blow would be enough. Multiple blows would be inconsistent with a fall, raising suspicions that could compromise the innocent image I’m associated with throughout the village. I’m reluctant to take such risk.


My eyes narrow thoughtfully as I scan the tapestry of summer petalled foliage in the garden borders.


*


Mrs Nolan’s made a Victoria Sponge. She tells me it’s to celebrate the Best Blooming Garden nomination, but I can see her tired old heart’s not in it. Nevertheless we’re both playing along with her pointless charade, while it lasts.


“Do have a slice before you go,” she urges me. “I’ll wrap up an extra slice for you to take home.”


We’re sat at her little kitchen table. I’ve taken Mr Nolan’s chair as I’m curious to see her reaction, but she doesn’t comment. She’s adored my company since he’s been gone- evidence of her lonely, pitiful existence. My heart swells to think that soon I’ll have released her from her misery.


“Won’t you have any tea, Mercy?” She looks quizzically over the top of her cup at my untouched one.


“I’m enjoying the delicious cake, Mrs Nolan.” I’m certainly glowing with anticipation; not at the sickly slice on my plate, but to see beads of sweat break out on her forehead.


Mrs Nolan raises a hand her heart, probably feeling some palpitations. “Mercy, you’ve been a rock over these last few weeks. I don’t know how I would have coped without you,” she tells me earnestly.


A curious sensation passes through me; a brief flicker of guilt, possibly even doubt. After all, it’s not too late, is it? I push the inconvenient emotions away, remembering my role as gardener requires ruthless management of the weak and sickly, and I wait.


It’s all happening fast now. Panic creeps into Mrs Nolan’s face as her heart begins to gallop like wild horses. She gasps, reaches out a hand towards me but knocks my plate of cake onto the floor. Both smash into pieces on the tiles.


Digitalis Perurea, a cottage garden favourite commonly known as the foxglove, is an excellent pollinator adding height and structure to summer borders. It’s also highly toxic. The foxgloves I propagated have been glorious this year, in my opinion outshining the dahlias by far. From the unripe green seeds I’ve ground a paste and steeped it in the tea that Mrs Nolan’s poured from the pot. Her cup stands empty on the table, white and fluted like the trumpet of a foxglove flower.


I watch closely and am certain Mrs Nolan experiences minimal pain as her racing heart outruns itself, my face disappearing from her view as her vision blurs and darkens. At her age, no one will suspect a thing.


*


The village shop door tinkles as I enter, and I wait patiently while Janet serves a child buying sweets from one of the large jars on the shelf. I smile indulgently at the youngster who glances uneasily at me and takes a wary, wide sidestep around me as he leaves- so strange that children often sense their vulnerability better than their adult counterparts.


“Mercy! How are you bearing up?” Janet is the picture of kind concern. “Such a blow to hear about Miriam. I heard you were there when she took poorly?”


“It was terrible” I murmur, eyes downcast. “She’d never truly recovered from finding Mr Nolan in such a state.”


“It was the shock, wasn’t it? And a broken heart. Maybe it’s all for the best.” Janet shudders before her bright demeanour returns. “What can I help you with?”


“Could I pop a note in the window, please? To let people know I’m available for work.”


With Janet’s permission I take out from my bag the card I’ve carefully written my number on and slide it into one of the plastic sleeves hanging in the shop window. It’s placed alongside local business cards and adverts for piano tuition and babysitting.


In my neat, orderly cursive I’ve written my number and a friendly message. I’m confident there will be a good response, especially as the Best Blooming Garden award is still up for grabs.


Does your garden need some love and care?


Call now for experienced help.


Just ask for Mercy.


May 22, 2022 19:53

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139 comments

Zama Bhala
23:54 Jun 05, 2022

Mercy reminded me of Joe from 'You' - polite, but cold and murderous. I got a hint of that from the moment that she crushed that poor snail. That was very well written, by the way. In fact, I loved this entire story. I kinda need you to write a full novellete so that I can understand why Mercy is a serial killer, and when she's going to get caught for it. Lol. Seriously, though, this was a very good short story. Congratulations again!

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06:56 Jun 06, 2022

Hi Zama, I see what you mean! Joe and Mercy do seem of the same ilk. Thanks so much for commenting.

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Chris Holland
07:45 Jun 05, 2022

Well done on your win a lovely sinister tale and an interesting take on the prompt given. Always amazed how Reedsy writers continue to come up with the goodies!

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17:55 Jun 05, 2022

Many thanks Chris, glad you enjoyed it.

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Nandini Panchal.
03:34 Jun 05, 2022

Congratulations! I loved your story. The way you have woven it together and connected with nature is amazing! Plus, the last line adds the icing on the cake.

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17:56 Jun 05, 2022

Hi Nandini, many thanks :)

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Jose Gonzalez
01:01 Jun 05, 2022

Great story your protagonist is a psycho but I love it. He is evil and I hate him but he isn't a cliche. You are a great writer, I enjoyed this piece and you deserved the win

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17:56 Jun 05, 2022

Thank you so much Jose.

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Story Time
18:24 Jun 04, 2022

I love having this kind of story be recognized for its excellence. It drew me in immediately and I already sent it to a friend that I know will enjoy it. Well done.

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17:57 Jun 05, 2022

Delighted you enjoyed the story. Many thanks :)

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Missy StClair
18:21 Jun 04, 2022

I loved it! I'll be thinking twice before considering hiring a gardener. HAHA. I love reading all these contest-winning stories. I want to submit a story sometime but I'm so intimidated because everyone on here is so skilled at the craft.

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18:01 Jun 05, 2022

Hi Missy, Thanks for your comment. I hope you do try submitting a story. It’s a really supportive and friendly community to try your writing skills out with, and it’s the practice that develops the skill.

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Zelda C. Thorne
15:07 Jun 04, 2022

How delightfully diabolical! Fascinated by the gardening detail. Superb writing. Perfect last line. Congratulations! So far, I've only read Old Soul, need to catch up with your other stories. I suspect I'm in for a treat😃

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18:01 Jun 05, 2022

Hey Rachel, Thanks so much for reading this and the other stories, and leaving such lovely feedback!

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Andrea Doig
06:27 Jun 04, 2022

Yes!! Loved it. Just my kind of a story. The last line is my favorite… I had wondered why you chose the name Mercy (though it should have become obvious haha!) but then the last line… yes! Knew she was a baddie when she responded as “sweetly as maple syrup”. A worthy winner - well done again. I love your style. And your plots. I need to get back to it too… been on a break as I’ve been so busy and no time. But I’m inspired again to get back on the bus ;) Thanks for sharing! Enjoyed it a lot.

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08:07 Jun 04, 2022

Hi Andrea, Thanks so much for your feedback. I’m hoping you do find time to get back on that bus- I’ll be looking out for your stories!

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Kira Carver
05:00 Jun 04, 2022

Really love the subtle signs of Mercy's unique perspective of the world. When she killed the snail, I thought to myself how mean it was. I wondered if I was supposed to even like Mercy. Turns out I wasn't.

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08:08 Jun 04, 2022

Hi Kira, You would certainly like Mercy at your peril! Thanks so much for reading, glad you enjoyed it.

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Piper Ollie
03:25 Jun 04, 2022

Hi there! Such a great story, and honestly a really unique way to take the prompt. All your stuff is super cool! You're definitely a master of suspense in a short story format!

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08:09 Jun 04, 2022

Hello Piper, Really glad you enjoyed the story and thanks so much for your feedback :)

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Andi Hyland
22:02 Jun 03, 2022

Great story and a well-deserved win! Lovely descriptive writing, and a clever ending.

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08:09 Jun 04, 2022

Hi Andi Thanks very much :)

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Karen Kinley
21:56 Jun 03, 2022

This was EXQUISITE! Loved every single word. Last line: perfection! What a deserved win!

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08:10 Jun 04, 2022

Hi Karen, Delighted you enjoyed it! Thank you for your comment.

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Beth Cheatham
20:05 Jun 03, 2022

I love the internal dialogue and the line "I, the gardener, am like God." I laughed out loud at that one, because as a gardener, often think of the similarities. It kept me hooked the entire time. I was secretly hoping Mrs. Nolan had turned the tables on Mercy and added some poison to the cake. :) Great job!

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08:12 Jun 04, 2022

Hi Beth, Funnily enough I did wonder if Mrs Nolan would do something like that but she just didn’t manage to pull it off when I was writing. So glad that the story appealed to your gardening perspective!

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Kendall Defoe
19:37 Jun 03, 2022

Excellent... And now, I have to feed my plants... :/

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08:13 Jun 04, 2022

Hahah! Take great care of them, they hold hidden powers.

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Tommy Goround
19:27 Jun 03, 2022

Clapping. I need to hire a plant assassin. Morning Glories everywhere... Nice use of botany. It's like learning while reading fiction.

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08:14 Jun 04, 2022

Got to love Morning Glory though. Thanks for reading :)

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Wow, another win! Amazing job!!!

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08:14 Jun 04, 2022

Thanks so much Kate!

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Karen West
17:51 Jun 03, 2022

L, I loved reading this. I am a new want to be writer and feel like I am learning with every story I read. You write with such clarity as to the story you are telling. I really love your indepth research on digitalis toxicity. I loved the play on the name Mercy. I don't know enough to give good feedback but just wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed the read.

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08:16 Jun 04, 2022

You’ve given wonderful feedback right there, thank you! Your at an exciting stage- who knows what will grow from your mind? This has been such a fantastic and safe community to explore writing in- I would recommend you give it a go!

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Karen West
16:30 Jun 04, 2022

Thank you for your response L. I was ready and wrote a story but the one I picked ended last night at midnight. I did not finish editing until today. I will think again about this week's topics. I agree this arena would be good for me as I grow.

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Cindy Strube
17:08 Jun 03, 2022

Masterful! I’m a fan of mysteries, true crime, forensic investigation… this hit all the buttons. And the name - Mercy! So perfect. The snail-crushing brought memories of my grandma, a very ladylike, sweet person who loved to garden. She detested snails, and would grind them to a dirt-encrusted glob of mucus with a well-placed heel! I’m just sorry I didn’t get to the story sooner - Hearty congratulations on a well-deserved win!

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08:17 Jun 04, 2022

Hi Cindy, Thanks so much! I’d much rather snails be crushed with a heel than fingers…

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Judy Murray
16:46 Jun 03, 2022

Fantastic story! Clever, creepy, and beautifully written. Congratulations!

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08:17 Jun 04, 2022

Hello Judy, Thanks so much, glad you enjoyed it!

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Mike Lavine
16:38 Jun 03, 2022

Love this. Finding myself wanting to know what happens with Mercy’s next employer. Well done and congrats!!

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08:18 Jun 04, 2022

Hi Mike, Indeed! Mercy’s on a murderous roll now :)

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