The Veil

The Veil

By Tima Renee

           We were all in a state of unrest. It felt like an hour that we would normally be nestled under our cozy blankets dreaming childish dreams. Instead, we were awake and sitting in the center of our dark bedroom. A tall pale candle burned in the window casting the shadows of our little bodies across the walls. We sat quietly together with the dark buried in the four corners of the room. “Laurel, stop crying!” Quail demanded. “You’re such a baby Laurel,” Teal cosigned. I sat there watching my sisters attack one another. I scolded Quail and Teal and reached over to hold Laurel’s hand. “Tabistae?” Laurel looked up at me, “are you afraid too?” she asked in her tiny, sad voice. “No,” I responded. “I’m just waiting, we’re all just waiting”. I answered patiently.

           Laurel was in fact the baby. Rather the youngest of the four of us at only six. She was tiny and fragile. One could understand why this was so difficult for her. Teal was only older by three years and more sophisticated. She refused to behave like a baby. She was almost as thin as Laurel but much taller. I watched as she shifted her body towards Quail, obviously annoyed at Laurel’s sensitivity. Quail was ten and barely a full year older than Teal. People always confused them for twins. Not only did they resemble one another the closest they followed each other the most as well. Even now, you can see their similarities. At fourteen, my features were more defined, and everyone said I was the splitting image of our disturbed mother.

           Laurel placed her small hand on my knee. “Mama was always a little sick,” she uttered reassuringly. “Overworked and Overwhelmed was what she was. I’m sure when she gets here, she’ll see the favor in our actions.” Quail added. “Listen, all of you,” I interrupted them. “What’s done is done. It is as it should be. Now we just wait.” I stood up and blew out the candle. “We’ll discuss it more tomorrow."

           When the day came, I appeared to be awake without feeling like I had ever slept. Quail and Teal were huddled in the corner staring at each other then looking out of the window. Teal looked over in my direction. “Are you aware again?” she asked me. I immediately noticed Laurel was not in the room with us anymore. As if Quail and Teal had read my mind, they both hauntingly pointed out the window. I ran over to the window and saw her sitting on the lawn smiling and giggling with a stranger. I looked at Teal and Quail. “We’ve been trying to figure it out since we noticed it,” Quail said. “How did she get out there?” I asked confused. They both shrugged their shoulders.

           I took a deep breath worried and scared but also feeling nothing at the same time. I cleared my mind and allowed my desperation to get to Laurel take over. I ran out the front door and towards her small body. She looked excited to see me and not afraid at all. “Where is the man you were talking to Laurel?” I asked her surprised I wasn’t more out of breath.

“He was already gone before you came out. It’s a pretty day isn’t Tabistae?” she said innocently. I looked at her and smiled not wanting to give away my concern and frighten her. “It is sweet girl,” I replied. Soon Teal and Quail were running towards us in the yard. “We should take advantage of this miracle and play like we used to,” Teal suggested. We all agreed to chase each other around laughing hysterically. We played for so long we forgot we had been waiting for our mother.

           I sat down on the porch to watch my sisters dancing around the tree that stood in the middle of the lawn. The day had moved faster than most and the sun was beginning to retire. I sat there wondering if mother would return at all. I could feel a pull away from where we had been for so long. I started to walk around the large house we had been secluded to. The tea set mother had last used when we had our tea party was still on the porch on the table. Dust had begun to gather around the shudders, and the leaves had flown onto the porch near the front door.

           The solid, metal object hanging on the doorknob caught my attention. I stared at it slowly approaching our front door. I could feel the stinging of tears rushing to my eyes as I realized what it was. I imagined myself running out of this same door earlier, then Quail and Teal following me shortly after. “But how,” I asked myself. I turned around and walked over to the end of the driveway so my sisters wouldn’t notice my expression.

           “There you are Tabistae, I wondered when I could get you alone.” I turned to face the voice coming from behind me. There he was. The man from this morning. The man who had been sitting in the grass with Laurel. The one she had been so comfortable with. However, I felt uneasy. “How do you know my name?” I asked him. “Oh, we know everyone here, behind the veil,” he answered with a smile that seemed to be more gums than teeth. “What veil?” I asked confused. “This is New Orleans, and you are standing in my mother’s yard.” I said quite rudely. He laughed at my assertiveness. “Tabistae, its ok to remember. When you do, look for me in the day light.” He said with that same creepy smile. I turned to look for my sisters who were playing hiding seek in the dark. When I went to look back at the man he had disappeared.

           We were back inside as night had settled in and minding our business again. I noticed Laurel coloring with her crayons and walked over to see what she was coloring. There were dozens of colorful people standing outside in front of the brightness of the sun. Then there were three girls to the side, colorless and inside of a colorless bubble. “Laurel,” I said. “Who are these three girls?” I asked her. “They’re you, Quail, and Teal.” She answered nonchalantly. “Why are we the only ones without color?” I asked pointing at the three of us. “Because you three haven’t been invited into the veil yet, it’s colorful only inside of the veil.” She explained. “Then who is this in all black in the corner?” I asked pointing at the person who had been in a red bubble in the corner of the paper. Laurel looked up at me and quietly said, “I don’t think mommy is coming back to us Tabby.”

           Laurel’s words were said quietly but the others heard her, nonetheless. They raced over to look at her drawing. “What are you talking about, why wouldn’t she?” Teal asked. I interrupted them announcing it was too late to have such a heavy argument.

“We know, we know Tabistae, we’ll discuss it tomorrow.” Quail said with frustration in her voice.

“Yea but we never do, we just go another day and never discuss anything.” Teal agreed.

           They disappeared upstairs as I sat down on the old recliner next to the fireplace. The words of the man were stuck in my mind. It was ok to remember. I sat there for hours in the same place. Both prepared and afraid as I finally decided to remember.

           I could see our mother laughing on the porch sipping from her pretty teacups. I stood from the chair and walked over to the window that overlooked the porch. There was no one there with her. none of us were sitting there next to her having tea. Am I remembering wrong? I thought to myself. She stood from her rocking chair and went inside. She put music on her old record player and began humming in her beautiful voice. She sat down in the same chair I spent hours pondering in and reached into the drawer next to it and grabbed a brush. She undid her long dark braids and began to brush her hair. Her faint smile drifted and was replaced with a look of anger and something sinister. My heart dropped as I heard laughing from outside. I walked over and my sisters and I were walking from the lake about a mile away. I was so intrigued by our bright faces and soft smiles I didn’t notice my mother get up and walk into the kitchen. She seemed to be rushing to retrieve vegetables and a roast. She pulled out a knife and began to chop at the selection of carrots, celery and potatoes. Our laughs grew closer, and I watched as our mother became more unhinged.

Quail’s words echoed in my head. Overworked and overwhelmed. Laurel was right, mom had always been a bit sick. I rushed to the window to see how close we were to the front door. I grew more and more afraid as I got closer to the truth. Soon I was out of my own head and back seated in the recliner I felt comfort in. I was resting my head in my hands when I heard the voice again.

“Now, now Angel,” the man said as he stood in front of me. Nothing in me wanted to ask how he got in. “I see this will be more difficult for you.” He said sitting down on the sofa. “What am I remembering?” I asked.

“The end of your life Tabistae.” He answered. I could feel the tears stream down my cheeks as I took in the news I had been avoiding. “You have to finish remembering Tabistae or you will be stuck here. Outside the veil and we will leave you behind.” He explained. I shook my head not wanting to remember anymore yet not wanting to miss being in the colorful place Laurel described. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.

           The front door burst opened and I watched my sisters and I enter our home. Our warm and comfortable home. Mother jumped at the sound of the door slamming and our uproar of laughter. She was frizzled and disturbed. “Why don’t you girls go wash up while I finish dinner.” She said hiding her true feelings. Feelings we never knew existed. How could we have known. We were innocent and naïve and it was ok.

           I was in the bathroom when I heard the first scream. I ran out in a hurry covering my wet body with the cotton robe. Teal was laying by the bathroom door bloodied and punctured. Bloody handprints were on the wall leading to the bedroom my sisters shared. Quail was lying on the bed, her arms outstretched and her body soaked in blood. I ran to look for Laurel when I heard humming again. I crept downstairs searching for the humming. My mother was sitting in the middle of the floor holding a bloody Laurel. I couldn’t muffle the sounds of my crying and she turned to me. She was crying hysterically as she complained about their noise.

“I just wanted them to be quiet. Are you going to be quiet for mommy?” she asked. “What did you do!” I yelled at her. She dropped Laurel and grabbed the knife and came after me. The next thing I remembered; I was in our bedroom with my sisters again.

           I opened my eyes and there was the man. Smiling at me. Quail, Teal, and Laurel stood next to him. “I don’t understand.” I muttered through the tears that had gathered in my mouth. Why have we been sitting here waiting for mom if we have been dead all this time?” I asked them. The man stepped towards me and grabbed my hands. “Come with me,” he said. I stood and followed him outside. Night had become day, and the sun was shining again. We walked across the yard as my sisters, and I had walked in my memory. I turned to look behind me and my sisters were not there. “Wait, I should wait for my sisters.” I said stopping in my tracks.

The man continued to walk me in the direction of the lake. “Tabistae, your sisters were never here with you,” he explained.

“You were here stuck in the veil all alone. To better handle the loneliness, you created a life where your sisters were here and you, much as you did in life, had to look after them.” he told me as he continued to walk with me.

“I don’t understand. I’ve been alone this entire time. Why? And why would I be waiting for her?” I asked in frustration.

           He pointed toward the lake, and I could see her. My mother, she didn’t look as young anymore and her dark hair had turned a bit grey. She was sitting at the edge of the lake rocking back and forth. I stood there watching her. “Is this another memory?” I asked.

“This is the reason you are still here,” he responded. “Everybody dies and some just sleep deeply Tabistae, but not everyone feels the anger as you did. Those who do become vengeful, bitter, and insidious. The doors won’t open for spirits like you. Your hate grew until one day,” he stopped and pointed to the lake.

           My mother screamed out in pain, clutching her chest tightly. She tried to get up and move but she couldn’t. As I watched her closely, I could see my wrongdoing. I had been causing her pain. I was the entity killing her. She stopped moving and lay there in the grass by the lake. It had occurred to me that the dark figure in Laurel’s drawing was my mother in hell.

“Laurel knew the whole time,” I said with surprise. The man stepped in front of me and blocked my view of my mother. “No Tabistae, you knew the whole time,” the man told me. “It is time that you forgive her and yourself so you can be free from here.” He suggested.

           I wanted to follow his instructions; I no longer felt the uneasy feeling with him. I felt peace and trustworthiness. “Will my sisters be there when I go?” I asked.

The man looked into the sky and smiled. “Not quite, I believe there is something different in mind for you.” He smiled at me and let my hand go. I could feel my body slip away.

I opened my eyes to the sound of beeping and loud breathing. My weak eyes searched the room and landed on my aunt Carol. She smiled amongst her tears. A doctor standing next to me began to check my eyes and mouth and asked me not to move. “You gave us a scare pretty lady; you’re still bandaged up but the healing process for your wounds has been very well.” the doctor reported. He looked over at my aunt and said he would give us some time alone. When he left my aunt rushed over to me and hugged me closely. I looked at her, “Aunt Carol, where are my sisters?” I asked worried. She cried harder and shook her head. I couldn’t understand what had happened. Why was I here.

“Aunt Carol, what am I doing here?” I asked her.

“Sweetie, you girls were attacked by your mother, it’s been three years.” She explained.

           I tried to sit up and examine my now seventeen-year-old body. “Where are they?” I repeated the question angrily.

“Honey, we buried them three years ago. Your mother passed away from a heartache only a year later. I’m so sorry dear.”

            I looked up at her in shock. “By the lake?” I asked.

           Aunt Carol’s face had turned pale. “How did you know?” she asked with fear in her eyes.

           I calmly responded, “Because I killed her while I was stuck in the veil.”