SNIFFILIS !

It all started at an early age, but it had gone unnoticed for

years. Her parents and any related adults simply ignored it if they

even saw it at all. Her friends surely witnessed it, but thought it

was perfectly normal. Sometimes it would benefit her older

brother, and on some occasion it would drive him crazy.

As she grew older, it became more anchored in her persona.

Her second grade school teacher, Mrs. McCarthy, had thought it

was a bit unusual, but only noted it in the back of her mind.

When Kathy was in third grade, Aunt Marie was visiting from

Nashville. She took Kathy and her brother, Tom, down to the

corner delicatessen.

“You can each choose a candy bar,” Aunt Marie announced.

Each eagerly moved to the candy counter. Tom quickly made

his selection. Kathy did not. Instead, she picked up one after the

other, and only then made her selection.

“Did you find one you like, Kathy?” Aunt Marie asked.

“Sure did,” Kathy replied. “This one smelled the best.”

Aunt Marie found this very odd, as all the candy bars were

wrapped and sealed in an opaque plastic wrapper.

Two days later, Aunt Marie took Kathy and Tom to play at a

nearby park. On their way back they passed a small neighborhood

grocery store.

“Shall we stop for some ice cream?” Aunt Marie suggested.

“You bet!” Tom exploded.

They walked through the door and were directed to the ice

cream freezer. They stood looking at the glorious assortment

through the glass.

“Go ahead. Make your selection. They have vanilla pops, fudge

bars, ice bars and ice cream sandwiches,” Aunt Marie encouraged.

Aunt Marie opened the glass door. Tom grabbed the ice

cream sandwich. Each item was surrounded by a sealed plastic

wrapper which showed a picture of its content. Kathy held the

door open, reaching for one pictured item at a time and smelling

the different wrapping of each.

“Kathy, make your selection quickly. You are letting all of the

cold air out of the freezer,” Aunt Marie said with a little

embarrassment in her tone.

“Yes, Aunt Marie,” Kathy said very slowly, stalling for precious

time.

Kathy finally decided on the orange and white symbol

packaging that encapsulated the creamsicle.

After finishing their ice cream treats, Aunt Marie decided to

do a bit of exploring.

“Kathy, do you always smell the plastic wrappers?” she

inquired.

“She always does,” Tom offered eagerly. “That’s how she

knows if she likes it or not. That way she doesn’t get into trouble.”

“That makes sense,” Aunt Marie said. “Kathy, can you smell

what’s inside the plastic?” Aunt Marie asked with a mild concern in

her voice.

Kathy sheepishly nodded.

It was obvious that Kathy had been made fun of for this

action.

“Was your creamsicle very good, Kathy?”

“Oh, Aunt Marie, it was the best!”

Aunt Marie had loved science when she was in high school.

Propose a hypothesis, then either prove or disprove its validity.

She would do just this before her return back to Nashville.  

Aunt Marie went lunch shopping. She bought two different

submarine sandwiches. Only one contained onions. Next, were

two identical looking cheese sticks. One provolone and the other

White American. All packaged and sealed.

Two days later.

“I’m making lunch today. It will be ready in ten minutes, so

don’t go far,” she said to the children.

Aunt Marie put plates on the table along with the cheese.

Next, the sandwiches.

“We will each have a half of a sandwich.”

Now to observe.

“Kathy, please pick one today.”

As expected, after sniffing each carefully wrapped sandwich,

Kathy insisted on the one without the onions.

“You each get a cheese. Kathy, please pick yours first.”

Again, the sniffing. A grimace with the provolone.

“I like this one,” Kathy said adamantly.

Aunt Marie picked up the knife to open and cut Kathy’s

selections in half.

“Pass me your plates, please.”

The hypothesis was that the onions and the provolone would

not get picked.

They were not picked!

That night Aunt Marie explained to the parents that their

young lady had an unusual ability.

“Kathy is my God-daughter. With your permission, I would

like to explore her future prospects and potential. This ability may

be of great value. As strange as it all sounds, I think this could lead

to something big.

The parents willingly agreed that this strange mannerism

should be pursued. They called it a “mannerism,” as they thought

“ability” sounded freakish.

Over the next several years, they worked with a medical

specialist whose area of expertise involved strange “mannerisms”.

“I believe Kathy has a sixth sense with her olfactory functions.

That being the case, we could help her to develop her mannerism

to a much greater potential,” Dr. Geiger explained.

“You said “we”?” Kathy’s mother asked.

“I am employed by the U.S. government. This area of study is

financed by the Department of S.U.A., that’s the acronym for

‘Strange and Unusual Abilities.’ That’s why there has never been a

medical bill.”

“There must be some catch to this” Kathy’s father questioned.

“I can tell you more, now that we’re at this point. But, realize,

this is High Security also. Your daughter, and your family as well,

are highly prized by forces that may be extremely self-serving.

You must have a family Pow-Wow to understand that, ‘Mums’ the

word!” Dr. Geiger explained in a gentle, but serious manner.

“Consider that anyone hearing you talk about ‘sniffilis’, will

automatically think it’s ‘syphilis.’ ‘Mums’ the word.”

“I’m not sure that I understand, but we will follow your

advice,” Kathy’s father said.

“There are others, actually quite a few. It’s called sniffilis.

Kathy has classic sniffilis. It is not a disease. It is a condition, a

probable genetic mutation that is an inherited gift. Most people

with sniffilis are employed by the government. In many other

areas as well, even detergent manufacturers. Quite a few are with

the airlines to sniff out bomb components. Their uniform is that of

an airline attendant. They simply peruse the cabin and check the

lavatories. Then, out they go. The plane is then cleared to board.”

“What do they check for?”, Kathy’s Mother asked.

“We are on a different plateau now. Remember, “Mums” the

word …”

They would see Dr. Geiger on a regular basis.

“So much was learned with training sniff dogs for drugs.

Then, we realized that a few people had the same promising

potential,” Dr. Geiger had once said.

A few years later, a letter would come from the U.S.

Government Dept. of S.U.A.

“Kathy will attend a government (Federal) high school in

Washington D.C. in a Virginia suburb. She has been awarded a full

scholarship!” “This will also be considered as four years of military

service with full benefits.”

What a deal!

Kathy worked many years with a major U.S. airline,

contracted out by the U.S. government. She enjoyed a great

retirement, still helping out with special assignments.

Kathy had a great sense of humor.

There was something that Kathy sensed, or probably smelled,

that we could probably never quite fully understand.

Upon her last visit to see Dr. Geiger, Kathy said with sincerity

that she felt that she was not well. She told the doctor that she

could smell death.

Upon her return, she said “I explained to him that I was ill.”  

A few weeks later, the gravestone would display only her

initials, dates of life, “Passing due to complications of sniffilis.” The

last line: “I told you that I was sick.”

Mum’s the word!