27 comments

American Science Fiction Western

The Transporter Museum, a forgotten relic, is inconveniently located on a deserted side street two turns off a dead-end alley. You might never find it, even by accident, but if you do, you’ll always remember its immaculate displays and its eccentric proprietor, Frans Messerschmitt.


Every day precisely at nine, the little old man illuminated the neon sign, flipped the placard to open, and made his way behind the counter, prepared for customers who rarely came.


It was already late in the day when the door opened, surprising both Frans and the visitors.


“Hello, is anybody there?”


The question startled Frans, interrupting his terminal boredom.


“Yes. Yes, please come in,” he answered, moving forward to greet his guests. The unexpected voice belonged to a handsome lad sporting sweatpants and a football jersey, followed closely by a pretty young coed in a letterman’s jacket.


“It’s almost impossible to find this place," the boy mentioned, all the while looking at the meticulously cared-for exhibits. “Are we in time for the guided tour?”


The question struck Frans as funny. It had been months since his last visitor, so the tours relied on guests, not the other way around.


“Of course, my good man,” he answered, sauntering from behind the counter. “My name is Frans and I'm the owner and resident historian. I’d be glad to give you the nickel tour, and I won’t even charge you the nickel.”


“Fan-damn-tastic! My name is Billy, and this is Connie. We’ve really been looking forward to this. Where do we start?”


“I’m glad you asked,” Frans replied, beckoning the couple to follow. “You’ve lived your whole lives in a time where teleportation from one side of the world to another was the norm—in fact, there’s about to be an app for that!” Frans turned their attention towards a smartphone sitting on display. “Before the end of the year, the new ZapApp will be available, offering skin-touch technology for the first time. All you’ll need to do is enter the desired coordinates, activate the app, and, in seconds—Voila!”


“Wow,” Billy exclaimed, reaching for the phone.


“Please don’t,” Frans cautioned. “These are replicas and can be easily damaged.”


“I hear ya, Gramps,” Billy responded, “Oh, I’m sorry. No disrespect intended, sir.”


“Not at all,” Frans replied. “I’ve always wanted a nickname. I like the sound of Gramps. Now if you follow me, I’ll lead you both back in time.”


The next display contained a full-length mirror attached to the wall. “I’m sure you two know what this is,” Frans said, stepping aside and allowing Billy and Connie to see. “These teleportation devices are still the most commonly used today. They were part of a trend to make teleportation more accessible and less obtrusive. They were also the first devices that didn’t require an exit portal. Until the Mirror 360, you could only travel to locations with paired devices. Needless to say, it was revolutionary.”


“That’s just like yours,” Connie whispered to Billy, punctuating her remark with a kiss on his cheek. “What’s next, Mr. Frans?”


Gramps,” Frans corrected her with a chuckle. “Next we see the machine that started it all, The Marie.”


“I’ve heard of that,” Billy said. “Wow, it’s huge!”


“I know,” Frans agreed. “When the technology was new, we hadn’t yet perfected the art of miniaturization. There were no personal teleportation devices. The only people who had access were scientists, investors, and celebrities. In fact, the first transporters were more gimmicky than useful. They were incredibly expensive, required an entrance and exit port, and were so inefficient that it took a full day’s charge to send someone from one place to another. There’s no doubt we’ve come a long way since then.”


“What about that one?” Billy asked, pointing to a machine partially hidden by a curtain.


“Oh, that one,” Frans sighed. “That’s the prototype. The first teleportation device.”


“That's the original?" Billy asked, moving closer to get a better look. "Is the legend true?”


“I'm afraid it is,” Frans replied. “The machine was the brainchild of a pair of scientists not much older than the two of you. They were the first to prove light was a particle and that we could use it as a mechanism for distance teleportation. The early tests were extremely successful. There were no issues when sending inanimate objects or small animals from one pod to another. The problem occurred when they tried transporting a human. Marie begged to be first and, after winning a game of Rochambeau, she stepped into the entrance pod and disappeared on cue. But when her partner activated the exit pod, everything went terribly wrong. Marie never fully rematerialized. Her translucent hand simply reached forward, and she mouthed the word help. Then she faded away.”


“Oh my God!” Connie gasped. "Did he save her?”


Frans turned away from the question, paused, then finally answered. “No, he didn’t. You see, molecular displacement teleportation in its infancy was like sending something through a tunnel at light speed. Once entering a pod, the subject can only exit from the paired terminal port.”


"That's tragic," Connie said, wiping away a tear.


“And ironic.” Frans replied.


“How so?”


“After the colossal mishap, her partner spent the better part of twenty years trying to find a way to release Marie from her tunnel. He became obsessed with correcting his mistake. His research and technological breakthroughs are directly responsible for almost every advancement in teleportation technology. That first awful outcome is why molecular transportation is so incredibly safe today. It’s why you have a Mirror 360 hanging on the wall in your home.”


“But Marie—what happened to her?” Connie asked.


“All of her partner’s research and all of his calculations never changed Marie’s fate.”


“She’s trapped forever?”


“She would be, unless he destroyed the machine and released her molecules into the atmosphere, never to be reassembled again.”


“What did he…”


“It’s almost closing time,” Frans said, interrupting Connie before she could finish the question. “Thanks for coming. You two made an old man very happy today.”


“This has been the best tour ever, Gramps.” Billy proclaimed. “What do I owe you?”


“Nothing,” Frans answered, shaking Billy's hand. “Just promise to send your friends.”


“It’s a deal,” he said, leading Connie out the door. “I’m sure we’ll be back soon.”


“You’re always welcome.”


Frans watched as the couple walked away. Then, being that it was precisely five, he locked the door, changed the placard to closed, and turned off the neon sign.


Alone once again, Frans returned to the machine behind the curtain, flipped a few switches, and watched as Marie’s translucent figure, forever young, appeared before him.


“Frans, are you there?” Marie mouthed, silently.


“I'm here, my love. I’ll always be here.”


“I’m so afraid,” she responded. “Please let me go.”


“I can’t,” Frans replied, ashamed of his weakness.


Marie’s eyes grew red, but she summoned the strength to place her hand on her heart and mouth the words I love you. Then, as quickly as she had appeared, she was gone.


Heartbroken, Frans turned to walk upstairs, counting the minutes until he could see his love again, if only for a moment, the next day at the exact same time.


May 24, 2024 19:59

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27 comments

Danielle LeBlanc
16:06 Jun 03, 2024

I am a lover of love, and LOVE when it's told in unique and interesting ways. I thoroughly enjoyed this story! And are you a fan of The Simpsons? I pictured Frans as Hollis Hurlbut, the curator of the society's museum (when Lisa finds out Jebediah Springfield was actually a villain). If you don't watch The Simpsons, then ignore that comment hahaha but I truly enjoyed your story. Excellent work!

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Thom With An H
16:44 Jun 03, 2024

This is my favorite comment. First of all, I really appreciate your kind and encouraging feedback but even more I love the Simpsons reference. Any time my writing and The Simpsons can find their way into the same paragraph I consider a win. :-)

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AnneMarie Miles
16:13 Jun 01, 2024

There you go, touching people's hearts again! And with a sci-fi twist! Tragic and beautiful, and expertly delivered. Thanks, Thom!

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Thom With An H
18:33 Jun 01, 2024

I’m so glad you stopped by. A comment from AnneMarie is all one needs to have a great day.

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11:10 Jun 01, 2024

I’m a sucker for love stories! It makes me think of Quantum Leap, The Time Traveller’s Wife, and Ant Man. Did he construct the museum around her on purpose? I definitely want to know more about Marie and Fran’s relationship. If it was so dangerous in the beginning why did he let her be the guinea pig?

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Thom With An H
20:11 Jun 01, 2024

I think he did build it around her and for her. In my mind’s eye, when I was writing it, I felt like they didn’t believe it was dangerous. That’s part of the tragedy. I do love the depth you brought to your comments and questions. I love being made to think deeply about my own stories. Thank you.

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Alexis Araneta
17:12 May 25, 2024

Thom, you always write stories with heart; this is no exception. Stunning ! The heartbreaking end made me gasp. The flow was just so good and keeps you wanting more. Lovely use of imagery too. Great job !

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Thom With An H
19:46 May 25, 2024

Hey there, my favorite beta reader. I know you've read it twice but if you read it once more, I think I've cleaned up some weaknesses. Let me know what you think.

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Alexis Araneta
04:39 May 26, 2024

Indeed, I have ! And it's just as lovely. I will be reading it after I come home from being out, if it's okay.

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Mary Bendickson
16:27 May 25, 2024

Sad love story for Frans and Marie.

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Isabella Montoya
16:05 May 25, 2024

Wow, great story, Thom! I liked the descriptions of the place and the characters. The end was very tragic and the story had a good development. Just some questions: Can Frans somehow save Marie? Why does she tell him to let her go?

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Thom With An H
16:37 May 25, 2024

I’m considering some revisions before the story is locked. I’ll let you know when to come back. 😀

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Isabella Montoya
17:09 May 25, 2024

Alright. Thanks, Thom!

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Thom With An H
19:45 May 25, 2024

Check it out now, I hope it feels better. :-)

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Isabella Montoya
00:20 May 27, 2024

Wow! It is indeed better. Now I can better understand why she tells him to let her go and what weakness Frans is ashamed of in the ending. It is sad that he tried for so much time to find a way to save her only to find out she can't be saved :'( Great story, Thom!

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Trudy Jas
13:12 Aug 30, 2024

Thom, I don't know if you are still judging, if you are could you go back and check if the stories you might have "shortlisted" actually show that they are shortlisted. None of the 5 I niminted this week and none of the ones I nominated in the past three weeks are showing up as being shortlisted. This affects how the winners are selected. I appreciate your help. If you notice a problem, please let Isabella at Reedsy know ASAP. Thanks.

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Thom With An H
13:35 Aug 30, 2024

Hey there, Trudy. I think that once the "Shortlisted" stories go through final judging, the ones that don't get selected have their designation changed to just approved. The stories I shortlisted that were shortlisted in the contest still have the designation in my queue.

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Trudy Jas
13:42 Aug 30, 2024

Thanks for checking. It is strange that it is just my issue. But I will sit out judging this weekend. Have not heard back from Reedsy.

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Marty B
03:27 Jun 06, 2024

A quantum Romance! I like that he can only see her at 5pm. But, in another view, it is also rather cruel that this woman is trapped for infinity as a spectral being who can only see Frans for just a moment every 24 hours. It might be love now, but will she always love her jailer? He is keeping her from her release because he cant let go.

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Daniel Rogers
01:02 Jun 04, 2024

If Nicholas Sparks wrote a sci-fi, this would be the result. Great idea. Creative story. If a follow up story comes to mind where Frans finds a way to free Marie, I'd read that.

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Eddie Collins
14:28 Jun 03, 2024

Wow! Amazing. I guessed Frans would be the companion working so hard to restore his lover. Love can make us obsessive, even clouding us to make the right decision to let go. Great story!

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01:53 Jun 03, 2024

Oh, wow. Poor Marie! Loved the sci-fi approach you took for this prompt.

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Devon Cano
22:22 Jun 01, 2024

This is one of my favorites that I've read so far for this contest, I love it! I'll never not be a sucker for a tragic love story, and the sci-fi elements were so interesting without being overbearing.

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Thom With An H
22:59 Jun 01, 2024

You are very kind. Thank you so much.

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Karen Kinley
16:54 May 27, 2024

Hello, old friend! It's been a long time! Loved reading this new story from you. Definitely has that "Thom" feel! Your ending is so heartbreaking but the love is palpable. Since you still have time for revisions, I thought I'd offer these thoughts. The way it reads now seems as if Billy and Connie arrived at 9am and stayed until 5pm. I wouldn't think a tour would last that long! Also, why can Frans only see Marie at that time of day and only for a few minutes? Other than that, this reads beautifully! Thank you as always for sharing!

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Thom With An H
21:15 May 29, 2024

Karen!!!! So great to hear from you. I added a line to clarify, I’m not sure if I’m sold on it. What do you think?

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Karen Kinley
16:25 May 30, 2024

Oh, yes! That works! Subtle but puts the reader at the right time of day. Perfect!

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