How I Wished I Could Dream Forever

Blue hair, green eyes, high cheekbones, straight teeth, and full lips. A voice calm and soft. Her pale arms reached out to me, holding me as warm tears fell from her glossy eyes. Her lips trembled as she dug her face deeper into my shoulder. My arms wrapped around her, comforting her before a bright light pierced my eyes. When I reopened them, I was looking at the ceiling. And the white, rugged ceiling looked back at me. It was a dream. Every time it was a dream. The same dream. But it always felt so real. The warmth and sadness from her body compelling me to hold her tight. But as my arms held her, the bright light would warp my sight, bringing me back to reality. How I wished I could dream forever.

Reality was harsh, dangerous, and filled with worries. Sleeping and dreaming was filled with safety and love. Though it was the same dream every day, it gave the same happiness and fulfillment. Though every day was different, the same feelings of sadness and hate-filled me. So many people, so many noises, so many expectations. How I wished everyone and everything would disappear. 

The sunlight coming from the window made me think it was around noon. I had once again slept in more than I should have. Looking around, my room looked like a tornado came through. Papers on the floor, books scattered, and clothes everywhere. I tried remembering what had happened last night, but all I could think about was the girl in my dream. How I wished I could comfort her.

I changed position from my back to my side; I needed a different view than the ceiling. I turned to my right side and looked at my paintings. There were only three. Two small ones and one big one. The big one was an unfinished lotus flower in a garden of people. The two small ones were paintings of the bright light and the girl from my dream. The light painting seemed accurate but the girl seemed off. I had plans to go to the store and buy more canvases to paint the girl perfectly. Nevertheless, the dread in my body caused me to continue to lay in bed. How I wished my body would move.

 Sooner than later, as the sun was slowly setting, my legs fell to the floor; dragging the rest of my body with them to feel the coldness of the wood. My weak arms got the rest of me up on my feet. My fingers went through my hair, putting it up in a ponytail. The clothes I already had on were good enough for me, so out the door I went. The street was deserted. It was odd. The street lights were on yet the sun wasn’t fully down. The birds were chirping even though it was soon to be night. How odd.

Reaching the art store, I saw how it shined the brightest out of all of the stores in the strip. The store was one of my favorites as it had all the art supplies I would ever need. Inside, there was no one. There was no ring from entering. I went straight to the canvas aisle. While going down the aisle, I noticed blue hair turning the corner. How could this be? No one was here, right? Was it the girl? To my interest, I followed the blue hair. It seemed like I was going down every aisle and I couldn’t get to her. I could only ever see her blue hair and her back. I could never catch up to her. But then she reached a dead end, an exit door. “Why are you running away from me?” I shouted out unwillingly. She stood there, looking away from me. How ironic. 

She didn’t move. She didn’t say a word. The blue hair was unmistakable, it was exactly like the one in my dream. The girl was the same height and the same shape. I couldn’t mistake her for anyone else. She was the girl in my dream. She was wearing a tan t-shirt that showed her pale arms. She had on light blue jeans and white boots. I bet her face was the same as the girl in my dream too. How I wished she would turn around.

“Hello?” I ask, walking slightly closer to her. Again, no movement. “Are you alright?” It was quiet. As I got closer and closer, I heard sniffles. I put my hand on her shoulder. “Hey…” I whisper, turning her around. Her eyes were filled with tears, making her eyes look like gloss. Her eyes were green, contrasting her blue hair. “Hey…” She whispered back with her full lips and a soft and calm voice. Her cheekbones were high and her teeth straight as she smiled at me with the most melancholy face I had ever seen. Her pale arms reached out to me, holding me. I held her back. The hug lasted for hours it seemed before my legs gave out and we fell to the store floor. Her face dug deep into my shoulder as her gloss-filled eyes let warm tears fall onto me. I held her tighter, hoping I was comforting her. How I wished someone could comfort me as I comforted her.

She and I stayed entwined with one another for minutes that turned into hours. Her crying never ended and my hug never let up. I held her with all my strength, letting her know I was going nowhere and that I was here for her. Why she was crying was a mystery that plagued my mind. How could one person cry so much for so long?

Before I could ask her why she was crying, the exit door opened. The light from outside was so bright, so bright that it blinded me. When I opened my eyes I was looking at the ceiling.  And the white, rugged ceiling looked back at me. It was a dream. Every time it was a dream. The same dream. But it always felt so real. The warmth from the hug and the sadness from her body compelling me to want to hold her forever. Why did the bright light have to warp my sight? How I wished I could dream forever.