The fruitless use of the phrase 'BE QUITE'.

What the librarian said was said many times before and will be said many times after.

A phrase that has echoed throughout time.

First said (most likely) by Ashurbanipal, king of Assyria who, by all accounts… (it was Wikipedia, ok) was the first ever librarian and operated in the first ever library which was located in Mesopotamia, Iraq.

He would first use this phrase to silence a drunken priest who called the mere concept of a library as “stupid, poop. This is stupid and its poop.”

And the last person to say the phrase would be named Captain Cheese Wedge, the non-binary ruler of the pies and pajama people and it would be said in what would be the last library in all of time and space… located under yo mama.

The captain would use this phrase for the last time on an interdimensional squid monster after it had begun singing never gonna give you up, seconds before the destruction of the universe.

But now… now it was said by an old lady named Agatha, the admin of a Facebook group that was about how bananas taste different now as compared to years ago and how it must all be the fault of teenagers and their mobile phones.

“BE QUIET!” Agatha said furiously. Following in the footsteps and paving the way for Ashurbanipal and Captain Cheese Wedge respectably.

“Jeez lady. Usually, the first response after hearing someone scream in agony is to call an ambulance.” Said the sarcastic little girl sarcastically. Her name was Lucy… something. Yup her name was Lucy Something, daughter of John Something.

 “maybe help him?” She continued as She pointed to her friend who was trapped under an ocean of shelves and books.

“Nope… I’m okay” said the shy little friend shyly, whose name was Andy… Andy. Andy Andy was his name oh yes it was.

Total disclosure the writer of this story didn’t have his morning coffee.

“your leg’s bent the wrong way.” Lucy pointed at his leg that was bent the wrong way.

“oh it was… always like this.”

“Look. Just get your friend out of there and clean up.” Said the librarian dryly.

“clean up! We didn’t do this! I swear I saw someone push that shelf towards us on purpose! This was an attempted murder and you should notify the proper authorities!” said Lucy frustratingly.

“I’m sure whoever it was didn’t mean it. It was probably and accident.” Muttered her shy friend whose name I totally didn’t just forget… Jordan.

“there is a mystery afoot! And I’m willing to bet you are in on it!” Lucy accused.

“You have an hour and make sure all the books are in their proper places. Remember that we use the Dewey Decimal Classification, not LC to organize our books” said the librarian before walking away.

“Did she say dookie?” asked Lucy.

“Dewey. It’s a way to organize books based on their subject and...”

“Just shut up and take my hand you nerd.” Said Lucy before pulling Andy (hay I remembered his name now! See I am a good writer) out of the rubble.

“Alright let’s go get that book you wanted me to help you find.”

“wha… what about cleaning up?” Andy asked.

“Are you serious!” said Lucy as she took Andy’s hand and left the area.

“so which section is it?” Lucy asked.

“oh um… the kids one. way in the back.” Andy answered while crossing his arms shyly.

“WHAT?! You said it was like a science book for like… studying?! Aren’t you too smart for books for kids?”

“Um…LOOK OUT!” Yelled Andy before pushing himself and Lucy away from what appeared to be a boomerang.

“AH! I see you two are still alive! Not for long bwahahaha!” laughed the antagonist antagonistically whose name was… antagonist… Jerry Antagonist.

“Jerry! What the hell is wrong with you!” said Lucy.

“Why are you doing this?” Andy asked.

Jerry shrugged and said “I dunno. You guys are my only friends and I’m bored and I wonna play.”

“That’s it? That’s just lazy writing.” Said Andy as Lucy and Jerry starred at him awkwardly.

“You know it’s weird when you talk like that.” exclaimed Lucy.

“Keeyaa!” yelled Jerry as he pulled a rope that caused the shelves around Andy and Lucy to collapse.

Lucy managed to avoid the shelves but Andy found himself caught again under the weight of one. he tried his best to get up but could not find the strength to do so.

“GET UP!” said Lucy.

“I… I can’t. I’m not strong enough… I don’t know how.”

“Yes you do. It’s as easy as shutting up and then just getting up.”

And with that amazing motivational line, Andy raised himself up and managed to break free, through strength and determination and mostly because Lucy helped him.

Lucy then sprinted toward Jerry and pushed him to the ground.

“YOU IDIOT! You could’ve killed us!”

“Oh it’s just a bunch of shelves and books. What’s the worse that could’ve happened? It’s not like your necks could’ve been broken.” Said Jerry

After an awkward pause they all realized that yes, their necks could’ve definitely been broken.

“I um… I’m gonna go… and not try to murder people.” Said Jerry, the self-actualized and totally not here to kill time and very necessary antagonist.

Moments later Andy and Lucy arrived at the far corner of the library.

The children’s section.

Which contained books that no children would, sadly, actually want to read such as red riding hood, Pinocchio, the three little pigs, and twilight (how did that get in there?).

Stories lost in time… until Disney brings them back for a mediocre live-action remake.

“Oh I found it!” Andy said as he pulled out a picture book that was titled (very creatively) Amazing Adventures.

“Really?! All this for that?” said Lucy bewilderingly.

Andy sat down and tried to open the book but couldn’t, his hands were shaking.

“I…my mom used to read this to me before she…she died and I just...”

“What happened to the book your mom had?” Lucy asked.

“Dad sold it.”

“Well… aren’t you gonna open it?” said Lucy pointing at the book.

“I… can’t.” replied Andy, hands still shaking.

“Here, gimme that,” said Lucy as she took the book from Andy’s hands.

She then sat down next to him on the floor and began reading

“once upon a time there was a little shy turtle named Andy…” Lucy turned to Andy.

“Oh… yeah my mom named me after the turtle.”

Lucy nodded and continued reading.

Be quiet was what the librarian wanted to say when she saw Andy and Lucy sitting on that floor, but the sight of a little human being reading to another little human being was too beautiful to silence, so she quieted herself instead as she realized;

Libraries were never places of silence

they were and always will be places

of love.

“Oh my God.” Sighed the librarian after turning around and seeing all the piles of shelves and books that she had to clean up.