paper hearts and plastic tablecloths

Submitted into Contest #72 in response to: Write a romance where your character falls in love with the last person they expected to.... view prompt

0 comments

Funny Romance

Clover was quite averse to speed-dating. It just seemed like a complete scam. You talked to a person for sixty seconds which was, realistically, barely enough time to meet someone, and then you just hoped they liked you enough for the two of you to get matched.


It was like online dating but suckier.


And yet, here she was, dressed in a cute blue sweater dress in a large, cleared out restaurant, the tables decked out with pink and red furniture, that was suffocating the room along with cutout paper hearts. 


Very tacky, she thought.


Her mother (she was a very interesting lady, no doubt,) urged her to go to the event, citing “the last time she went on a date was two years ago.” 


Now, that may be true, but nobody had either clicked with her or fit her ideal type.


Clover wanted a quiet, charming, intelligent man who was a great problem solver, but all she got were men who wanted a cute girl who would cook for them. 


Was it her appearance?


She was pretty short at five feet even and she could admit she had a babyface, but still. 


She couldn’t even cook either.


The event organizer clapped her hands and mostly everyone turned to look at her.


“Ok~ay, let’s get started. I’m sure most of you know the rules, but if you don’t, let’s lay down some ground rules right now!” 


“Firstly and most importantly, have fun! This event is being held so singles like you can meet someone. Secondly, please be polite and kind. If you don’t follow this, we will not hesitate to remove you.” Wow, that was a lot more than what Clover was expecting.


She had been to a couple of speed-dating events in the past, and they were...let’s just say shady.


“Thirdly, the men will be rotating.”


“And fourthly, you have sixty seconds per partner. No more, no less. Starting...Now!” She clapped her hands one more time, and a cloud of chatter broke out in the crowded large restaurant.


Clover turned to look at the man across from her who was already speaking in rapid-fire English.


“-od, so, do you have any hobbies?” The guy, James, according to his name tag, said.


Aw, man. She had missed half of what he had said. He seemed like a pleasant guy at first glance, or maybe it was the blond hair, blue eye combo fooling her.


“I really enjoy,” Clover started. Should she tell the truth, which would be cheap and often trashy video games, or should she tell a little white lie and say writing? She was a journalist after all.


Pfft, who was she kidding? She was going to tell him the former anyway.


“Video games. I really enjoy playing them. Ooh, especially bad games. I actually have a copy of E.T the-” Clover started to ramble passionately.


Halfway through, James seemed to lose interest and clocked out, looking at the girl next to Clover.


Oh well, Clover didn’t really mind.


The annoying timer rang and James moved on to the next seat.


“Hi, It’s nice to meet you,” Clover held out her hand and looked down at the sticker name tag he had on.


“Garrett.” He said and took her hand, giving it a good, firm shake.


“Clover.”


“So, uh, Garrett, what do you do, for like, work?” Clover leaned onto her arms.


He ran a hand through his crimson red hair and smiled, “I’m an accountant. It’s not as boring as it seems, trust me.”


Clover let out a light chuckle, glancing down at the cheap, red plastic tablecloth. That was unexpected.


Usually, you shouldn’t judge a person by their looks, but it was human nature. You just wouldn’t have thought he would be an accountant.


“What do you do, if you don’t mind me asking, Clover?” He smiled, crossing his arms.


It seemed kind of cocky. Or maybe she was just overanalyzing things. “I’m a journalist.”


“Ah, so for like a newspaper, or a blog, or what?” Garrett said.


“I write for a small niche news company. You probably haven’t heard of it, but it’s called ‘The WIB Bulletin.’” 


Garett looked like he was about to cry but then broke out in laughter.


Oh, so he was one of those people.


Clover then decided to spend the rest of the sixty seconds on her phone, irritated.


Garrett and many others (some good, some bad, some terrible,) came and went until the event was nearly over, two rotations left.


“Ian.” He held out his hand and Clover shook it weakly, energy drained.


“Clover.”


“Huh, that’s an interesting name, you look like a Sophie or maybe a Greta.” Ian retracted his hand and used it to prop up his head.


“That’s nice,” Clover said bluntly. She didn’t mean to be rude, her filter had been sanded down to the mere thickness of fine mesh and she was just about over this.


At this point, she just wanted to find her matches, go home, sleep, and look over them in the morning.


“So, uh, Clo-ver,” He said slowly as if this was the first time he had heard the name.


Clover blinked, glancing around the dim room. She was halfway to Dreamland already.


“Clo-ver, if you could travel anywhere, where would you go?”


Clover willed her brain to think, mulling over the question.


“I really want to go to Morocco or Italy. They’re both really beautiful countries, ya know?” Clover said, half asleep.


Ian nodded, his eyebrow furrowed.


“I really want to go to England and maybe try authentic fish and chips.” 


“You know what; you should. It’s very rainy though, so try to not go during a particularly rainy month.” Clover drawled, looking him in the eyes.


“Okay then! I will!” Ian clapped his hands together.


The timer rang for the second to last time, and Clover could almost taste her sweet, sweet liberation.


“Nice to meet you, I’m Keegan, and you?” The man across from her spoke loudly, rousing Clover from her sleep with a jump.


He was dressed in a magenta sweater and blue jeans, something that Clover thought she wouldn’t really see today.


She had half the mind to glare at him but decided against it last minute. “It’s Clover.” She said sharply.


This man apparently had no regard for tone in speech because he just gave her a smile.


“So, Clover, I couldn’t help but hear you play video games? So, what’s your favorite?” Keegan asked with a charming smile.


Clover was taken aback but then remembered he had been sitting next to her and, uh, James, when the event first began.


She had nearly forgotten the man’s name.


“I really like horrendous games, games so bad that they’re good, in a way. My personal favorite is E.T the Extra-Terrestrial. It’s terrible, the bosses are too hard to beat, the game design is complete and utter garbage, and not to even mention the early 2000s graphics. But it being such a huge dumpster fire of a game really draws me in.” Clover explained, finally speaking to someone who would listen to her about her hobby.


It felt nice to talk to someone who would listen, eagerly. Especially if they knew what you were talking about.


“I think I actually got the game when it came out and god, was it bad. Have you heard of Hotel Mario?” Keegan’s green eyes lit up.


Clover wasn’t into that ‘love at first sight stuff’ or really, love in general, but when she says she’s smitten, she might actually mean it this time.


“Yeah, I have, the graphics are so bad, I mean, pssh, I could probably do better. Other than that, it’s kind of good, I guess, I mean, it’s sitting in a basket at home because I don’t play it often, but yeah.” Clover glanced down at her hands as the timer rang.


“Okay, and that sums up the dating part of this event! We will now tally matches! Please fill out a card and drop it in this box!” The woman announced, pointing at a tin container with red hearts plastered over it.


Clover felt rejuvenated? If that was the correct word to use. She felt much more lively now and she probably wouldn’t fall asleep while in the parking lot of the large restaurant.


You never know.


She plucked one of the pieces of cardstock and took it back to the seat she had been sitting in for the past 30 minutes.


It felt so very good to get up after staying seated for so long.


The card was just like a questionnaire, it asked who would you be most likely to date out of today’s candidates, who wouldn’t you be most likely to date from today, what you look for in a partner and how you would describe yourself. 


This would be easy.


“Make sure to come to the follow-up event!” Clover figured you got an email if you got a match. 


She scribbled in her answers, walked up to the box, dropped her card in, and left the building, assuming the event was finally over. 


Clover’s stomach growled and she groaned, making her way across the emptying parking lot to her car.

-


Clover did not expect to get an email from the service a week later.


She was almost nervous to open the darn thing, wondering who could have matched with her.


‘Congrats,’ It read in a fancy font like some sort of letter from the 1700s.


‘You have matched with someone!’ What? Were they not going to tell her? Was this some kind of elaborate scam? She continued to read the email, despite this.


Oh. It was right there. She was just impatient. 


‘Keegan A. is your match!’ Clover instantly thought back to the man wearing the magenta sweater with the man bun and her heart started to pound in her chest.


They had a great conversation over old and terrible video games. Clover was very good at making first impressions. Clover sighed, dropping her phone on her couch as she took a deep breath.


She hoped she wasn’t going to be as awkward as last time. But deep down she knew that was impossible.


-


Entering the large restaurant again made Clover think back to a week ago which felt like a long time ago at this point. 


Her eyes scanned the large room.


There actually weren't many people in here, and that made her all the more nervous to spot Keegan.


She sat down at one of the tables, and instead of being red, the tablecloth was a much more calming lavender.


Clover waited, eyes wandering as she waited for the same organizer as last week to begin speaking.


Maybe he bailed or something?


“Good evening, as you can see, there are about half as many people as last time, which should make this real easy!” The organizer said.


“You guys should know your matches by now, so I’ll leave you guys to it!” 


“Um, Clover?”


Clover turned to see Keegan standing behind her, thick man bun and all.


‘How are ya today?” Keegan asked, taking a seat across from the woman.


Clover took in a deep breath before returning her focus to the ethereal man in front of her.


“Kinda burnt out, but other than that, I’m just peachy. You?” 


Keegan gave her a small smile, “I’m good, I’m also really pleased that you were my match.” 


Her heart fluttered. Clover was surprised he said that.


She should probably get the whole ‘heart flutter’ thing checked out. It’s probably not supposed to do that.


“Me too. So, what do you do?” Clover cleared her throat, her face feeling hot.


“I’m a creative writer. I write novels and mostly teach workshops, ya know?” Keegan said.


Clover nodded, “I’m a journalist. I write for an online news site. I tried creative writing once. Let’s just say it didn’t turn out too good.”


He chuckled and pulled a pen and paper out of his bag.


“It’s not actually that hard. See, look.” 


“That’s easy for you to say,” She muttered playfully, taking a look at the notepad Keegan had placed on the table.


“I would like to believe there are steps to forming an idea and executing it, as there is for most things.”


Keegan explained the steps of his process in detail, and Clover could see he was very passionate about his craft.


“You really like to write, huh?” Clover’s eyes curved into crescents as she grinned.


Keegan rubbed the back of his neck, “It’s my life, you could say. I love it.”


Clover could see that. The intense look in his eyes as he gazed at her spoke dozens of truths.


She shrunk under his gaze before he looked back at his notepad. “Keegan, excuse me for saying this, but you seem almost too smart to be at some speed dating event.”


Keegan laughed again.


“I guess you could say I’m a hopeless romantic. I’ve probably read too many stories of love at first sight and princesses getting saved by knights. What about you? You seem almost as if you didn’t want to be here.” He explained.


“I’m kind of the opposite of you. I’m not really into romance, but I’m really trying to put myself out there and what better to do than speed dating, huh?” Clover scratched her cheek, glancing up at the brown wooden ceiling.


Keegan nodded in what seemed to be understanding.


“I don’t really like speed dating either, just kinda feels impersonal, and it’s getting pretty late, so maybe we could go out for drinks? On me?”


“Yeah. Let’s do it.”


Clover was antsy and picked up her bag, tapping her foot on the ground to keep her nervous energy under wraps.


She was surprised this was happening. She was surprised she was going out with someone who didn’t fit her type. The cool, calm, and collected.


Instead, she was ‘hanging out’ with Keegan, and so far, he seems serious but also like a goofball, he liked video games, and he liked to write.


And most of all, she was surprised she was falling in love with someone so quickly that she met in a place with paper hearts and plastic tablecloths.

December 14, 2020 17:36

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

0 comments

RBE | Illustration — We made a writing app for you | 2023-02

We made a writing app for you

Yes, you! Write. Format. Export for ebook and print. 100% free, always.