Misdial

“911. What is your emergency?”

“Hey Mom, how’s the back treating you today?

“Are you aware that you have called 911 for emergency services?

“Yeah, Mom of course. You know you always told me that I was going to go through everything you did, so sometimes I just have a feeling you’re not doing okay.”

“I see… Miss, I’m going to ask you series of yes or no questions so I may help you. are you in immediate danger?”

“I’m not sure. You know me I’ve always loved dessert and I thought oh a slice here and there will be fine. But um... you know lately I’ve found that certain… ingredients don’t exactly agree with me so a little trouble digesting.”

“Is someone in the room with you now?”

“Yep, the peanut butter bar.”

“Do they have a weapon?”

“The peanuts are what messes me up, not the cake.”

“Please listen to me clearly okay. We want to get you into a safe situation. Due to the current situation I’m going to need a description of the person. Is this a man?”

“No, mom.”

“Is this a woman?”

“Still no mom”

“This is not a woman?”

“Yea mom about that you know- you know how everything thinks a peanut is a nut, but actually it’s a legume?”

“Oh my god. Miss um... hold on. Give me a moment ... Hey- hey bob we got another one. Bob get over here please, I haven’t had one of these yet. And it’s moving closer- this call is from Tennessee.”

“Follow your protocol you know what to do.”

“Um mom, yea mom if you could let me know that when you worry about me then I do too so just tell me that everything will be alright.”

“I need to confirm some information before I can help you okay?”

“Yes, okay.”

“Please confirm you are at 106 Freeman Street in Tullahoma, Tennessee.”

“Yes, mom I am.”

“Is there a human in your apartment?”

“Just me.”

“But there is a being in your apartment besides yourself?”

“Yes, there is, just one piece of the bar left.”

“When did you notice it was there.”

“All of a sudden, I could feel my insides turning.”

“And ma’am, please be very clear with me… have you told anyone else about this?”

“No, I called you first.”

“Okay um miss, I’m sorry but uh I’m going to have to get us connected with some higher authorities. You may feel some apprehension but please understand we are doing our absolute best to contain your situation. Your location is being surrounded. Please hold”

“Mom... please. Can you tell me-”

“Hello. Ma’am this is Agent Wilson with the FBI and ETD Division.”

“Oh, hey dad. I didn’t know you’d be in tonight. Yeah, what is that show? Is that something new you’re into?”

“That’s the Extra-Terrestrial Defense Division Ma’am. Please listen and listen closely. Now we have been informed by your local precinct here that you’ve found yourself in a predicament. Now I’m not going to ask you how are why, but I got to tell you this doesn’t sound too promising since we have kept up the border between us in them for a good 28 days now. The only instances that have occurred since have been by invitation. So please answer me truthfully these next series of questions”

“Dad, you know I would never... um... that show is awful, I don’t. I wouldn’t- “

“Please just answer the questions ma’am. Did you or did you not invite this being into your residence?”

“N-no.”

“When did you first notice its appearance?”

“The indigestion was all of sudden; didn’t mom tell you? I thought that it would be okay.”

“So, you did intentionally invite this being to your home? I need you to be clear on this. The specificity of the situation requires you to be frank.”

“I, um, well they said, my nutritionist said it would be fine since, sometimes allergies don’t affect you like they do others.”

“How many arms?”

“Too many to count.”

“If it is red say 1200 or green say 600”

“900... dad. Right in the middle”

“Jesus...Now I can ascertain that it must be in a sleep like state for you to have kept this conversation going so far. Since you are still able to have this conversation you must have not triggered any of its confirmed warning words or pitches of voice so I will commend you for that.”

“Thank you... dad, please can you uh, tell me how that show ends, since you see it all the time”

“I’m going to be honest with you. It doesn’t look good. You are the sole incident we’ve had and we’re not looking to make any more waves. There’s a delicate balance we’ve had and the fact it has not come up on any radar is concerning to say the least.”

“I don’t mind spoilers, please”

“Hold on ma’am. Yea Chief? Uh-uh, uh-uh. Affirmative.”

“Dad...?”

“Ma’am, we cannot confirm or deny what has attracted this one to your home. If you can see it then that means it has already infiltrated your water supplies, the soil, the dang apartment foundations. If it’s there, then that means we can’t deny whether or not that those spores are in you. We are not going risk that. I know you this is not what you want to hear but-”

“No agent this isn’t right! Please! “

“You need to stay calm; we have a team and a detox center, but I don’t think you will make it. We will try”

“Try?? You have to help me!”

“Stay calm! You are talking way too loud and high. You need to stay calm”

“Calm? Stay calm?! This thing in my house is going to AGHHH - “

“Ma’am?”

“Ma’am?”

“Jim you still on the line with us? Yep. Yeah, we lost her. Uh-uh. Yeah, no we never had the team on the way. Once we sent her voice scan through the sensor, the alterations on her voice waves lit up like a Christmas tree. Yeah, that’s right. Okay. Go ahead and blow it.”