New Traditions, Same Love

My name is Allie Watts. If you knew me, you'd know that Christmas is my most favourite time of the year. Putting up the tree with my sister and my brother, Maisie and Chris, stringing rainbow coloured lights along our eavesdrop, and exchanging gifts, smiling and laughing when our mother's wrapped a stick of deodorant for my brother for the sixth time that it's now become a tradition.

If you really knew me, you'd also know that my life isn't constantly filled with happiness and surprises... or at least, good surprises. My mother and father got a divorce only two years ago.

It was really hard on me. Maisie, since she was only 4, didn't really understand what was going on. Boy, was she lucky.

Chris? Oh, he didn't care one bit. Dad already didn't accept Chris for coming out as bisexual. So when he figured out my mom was getting full custody of us, he was relieved.

And as for me?

Well, I've never understood how I feel. Of course I was sad, and angry, and lost... but the problem was, my father had been someone I looked up to. He wasn't perfect, and he made many mistakes, but he was someone who actually understood me. He took me to buy ice cream on the first day of the summer. Mom was with Maisie at her soccer practice and Chris was doing homework. I still remember when he saw me sitting by myself on the couch looking out the window, the sun blazing through.

"Looks like the kinda day to get ice cream," he had bellowed, a huge smile forming on his face. "Whatta ya say, Allie Cat?"

That day was the best day of my life.

I haven't seen my dad in two whole years. It hasn't been easy on anyone, but especially me.

Mom remarried last year. She held a big wedding with blue marigold flowers and pearl white daisies. She met the man, a Japanese American named Reo, through a job. They hit it off with a few dates and he proposed to her. I hadn't trusted him at first, but slowly, my siblings and I ended up really liking him. He was nice, really funny, and loved to tell us stories of what it was like to be raised in the centre of Japan.

Now, as snow slowly fell down, I walked down the stairs of our small suburban house, feeling filled with Christmas warmth. It was the first Christmas with Reo, and I was so excited to explain to him all about the traditions of our food and activities.

But as I stepped down the last stair, I stayed glued to the floor. My mother, with her black locks braided to the side and her jeans and black shirt, was passing a box of KFC chicken to the table, where Keo started unpacking it.

Maisie sat at the table in her ugly Christmas sweater with penguins on it, smiling and bouncing, her pigtails tied up with red ribbon. "I love chicken!"

My older brother Chris was putting out plates, wearing a Christmas hat.

I saw my mom, grinning from ear to ear.

"MOM?" I called out, confused.

She looked up at me. "What's the matter, Allie Bear?"

"What's the matter?" I asked, bewildered. "The matter is that there's no turkey cooking in the oven, no mashed potatoes in your favourite red bowl, and no gravy! Anywhere!"

She nodded, passing another red and white box of something fried over to Keo, who passed it to Maisie. "This year is going to be different."

I stood at the bottom of the stairs, my arms now crossed. "We always have a turkey. And mashed potatoes. And gravy."

My mother shook her head, now joining the rest of my family at the table. "Allie, we are trying something new. Please be respectful of Keo and his traditions."

I shook my head in distaste. "This doesn't make any sense! KFC isn't a Christmas thing. That has nothing to do with Christmas."

Keo, trying not to be offended, kept talking to Maisie, offering her more chicken.

"Allie, that is extremely disrespectful. It does not matter what's served on this table at Christmas time. It's the people that surround it. You should be much more thankful that you have people that love you."

"If dad was here, we wouldn't be having KFC for Christmas dinner," I said angrily.

My mother looked up at me. With one glance, I knew what she was about to say. "Go to your room. Now."

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I lay on my bed on my side, wiping my face to get rid of the tears that stained my cheeks. My door slowly creaked, and in walked Chris. He sat at the end of my bed, and let out a sigh. "Hey."

I stayed rolled over, my hands curled up. "What do you need?"

He looked over at my wall. "Well, first of all, Christmas dinner isn't the same without you."

I stayed quiet.

"I thought you liked Keo," Chris said, confused.

"I do, I do like Keo. I think he's funny and he's really nice, and I know mom loves him a lot. But..."

"So what's the issue, Als? Cmon."

"He's not dad."

Silence rose up. Chris nodded.

"He's not dad, you're right. Thank god," he said under his breath, trying to not let me hear. "But that's what makes him different. He's not supposed to be a replacement."

"But he's replacing our traditions with his. He's taking over the things that make me happiest."

"It's one year. Hey, I wasn't so impressed either when I saw Keo and mom bring in the huge buckets of KFC. But you know what? It's different. It's apart of Keo. And apart of learning and changing and growing is accepting new things and trying new traditions. Life can't be the same every day. As years go on, there's new things to look forward to. So why don't you come back out and join me, mom, Maisie, and Keo? Be apart of this tradition and remember the old ones? The ones with dad?"

I nodded. "I guess."

"And guess what? Keo bought a Christmas cake, and it has strawberries, your favourite."

_____________________________

As we all sat the table, passing around KFC chicken and laughing, I realized that life does change.

I knew I still missed dad, but I also knew that mom didn't. That she moved on and deserved to be happy. I knew Chris didn't, and was now so much more safe. And I knew Maisie didn't, because she was so much more care free than I ever had been.

"Did Santa bring you gifts in Japan?" Maisie asked Keo, ripping apart a piece of chicken.

"Santa did in fact bring me lots of fun toys," Keo said, smiling as if he was remembering fond memories. "But Hoteiosho, who is a god of good fortune, also brought us many gifts throughout our childhood."

"Isn't that cool, Allie?" my mom said, staring at me with hope.

I hesitated. "Yeah," I said with a smile. "Yeah, that's actually really cool."