" Between Two Hearts "

Between Two Hearts

Yes, as much as I’ve had people laugh at me, shout at me and patronize me, there is perhaps nothing more rude than an eye roll. To the middle-class, middle-aged lady in the hipster pizzeria in East London who rolled her eyes at the Polish waitress: Shame. On. You.

Eye rolling is rude in all circumstances, not just when you’re speaking to somebody who isn’t fluent in your language. Your waitress was kind, good at her job and clearly trying her level-best to communicate with you despite your incessant whining. She repeated the menu perfectly – twice – and answered your questions as best as she could. If you don’t have the decorum to abstain from rolling your eyes at strangers, perhaps you’re not as socially well-healed as your Platinum credit card might suggest.

You might think this is so ridiculously obvious that it doesn’t need saying. But if that’s the case, why don’t more people do it?

I've lost count of the times, when, after a few slow greetings, the person I'm speaking to hits the fast forward button. And it doesn’t seem to matter how many times I implore “Can you speak more slowly please.” As soon as the conversation hots up, the snail-paced speak stops.

So, how slow should you go with someone who’s learning a language? If you sound a little silly, you’ve probably got it about right. If you possess one of those lovely, quirky regional accents, hit the slow button about ten more times more.

I find it much easier to understand something when I read it compared to when I hear it. Even in English, I like to see new words spelt out in my mind’s-eye before I truly get a grasp.

Writing a foreign word down helps remove any of the pronunciation problems if you’re speaking to me in a fast or heavily accented way. It makes it easier for me to look the word up in a dictionary and, sometimes, even guess at its meaning. Plus, it's much more likely that I will remember the word – especially if you write it on a piece of paper.

I know that when I throw a bunch of foreign words together I sound like a cave woman. However, in the early stages of learning a language, I have too much going on in my brain to concentrate on being graceful. I’m going to mash the basic words together and it won’t sound pretty.

The point is: Can you understand me? Do you know that I want tacos with chicken? If you get it, great. I’ve achieved my goal. When I reach an intermediate level of speaking, I promise I’ll aim for grace, but until then, cave woman speak will have to do.

I have a missing brain cell…actually, there’s discussion between my family and friends that I might be missing more than one, but there’s a particular brain cell I’d like to talk about – the one that covers learning a language.

Ever since I first set foot in Spain, then Latin America, I’ve been trying, painfully slowly and with a great deal of difficulty, to learn Spanish. It’s not proven entirely impossible – I certainly know more than when I began – but given the amount of time I’ve spent in the Spanish-speaking world, my lingo skills should be much, much better.

But I'm trying. And in the spirit of understanding – both linguistic and otherwise – I'm putting out this call to the people whose language I'm butchering: a guide on how to speak to someone who doesn’t speak your language.

And for all you native English speakers out there, you might want to take this guide into account next time someone from another country struggles to ask you for directions too.

I know a guy named “ Greetal ” . Of the 7 thousand villages dotting on the map of India. , Tamkrit was probably the tiniest, indicated on the district survey map by a microscopic dot. The village consisted of less than 30 houses and it was Greetal’s home which was found at the balustrade of the street. He was an illiterate south Indian villager who knows only Tamil and has ever stepped outside his village. The foreigner with hi English is baffled by the imcomprehensible and bizarre behavior of Greetal while Greetal is equally mystified by the American’s strange words and Antics and now it’s me who is turning woster than Greetal. I know you need to explain to me that the volcano hike will be muddy, but if I don’t understand the word for mud, simply repeating it over and over isn’t going to make any difference. Say it slowly. Say it loudly. I still won’t get it. You need to come at it from another angle like a translation app, dictionary (both of which I have) or some visual aid..Like pointing at some mud.

yes , it's difficult for me to speak but not to learn. " Can I get a teacher to teach ? " Taught I in my mind but was hesitated to ask since I knew the reply of what could it be.

We’ve got so many coffees in this place, we’re…like…one of the most popular places around. I even think we might have invented the Cortado, which we now serve with super-skinny-soy if ya like. Though we’ve also got a bunch of frappes to beat the heat, but really it’s up to you…whatever’s you like, cos we pretty much have everything. So, what’ll it be?”

What I wish the guy had said was this: “What would you like?”

I wish I had a peso for every time someone called me out on my lack of language skills. Yes, even after months travelling through Latin America, I'm not exactly fluent. I will get there. It just takes me more time.

If there is one thing that annoys me more than anything else, it's when I strike up a conversation, or try to order something in a foreign language, and the person responds in English. Yes, I’m highly impressed you speak my language better than I speak yours, but I will not improve unless I practice.

I spoke with a french man and he was like :

Man : HOLA ( Hello )

Me : Gud mrng           

Man : Cómo estás? (How are you?)

Me : Yes

Man : Cómo te llamas? (What's your name?)

Me : No

Man : ¿Donde vives? (Where do you live?)

Me : I know

Man : ¿De donde eres? (Where are you from?)

Me : no

Man : ¿Cuantos años tienes? (How old are you?)

Me : ok

Man : Cómo te la pasaste este fin de semana? (How was your weekend?)

Me : nice

And from now I start learning all of the languages.

!!! THE END !!!