Jamais Vu

`I woke to the blare of sirens. All I could do was lay there in pain. My head was throbbing and the pain in my arms seemed unbearable. I attempted to speak, but the brace around my neck wouldn't allow me to even whimper.

"Don't move!" I heard someone say. I felt myself being lifted off the ground. Every jolt and every move hurt. My whole body was throbbing.

"You've been in an accident." The paramedic spoke looking down at me as they attempted to lift my body onto a stretcher. I glanced over at the tangled wreckage that once was my car. It was completely totaled. I was lucky to come out alive. The only thing I could remember was crashing into the back of a semi-truck. The piercing noise of my car folding onto me and the pain before I blacked out. My vision blurring. I winced as they finally pushed me into the back of the ambulance. I lifted my head and noticed bystanders standing observing the chaos which had just occurred on the street.

When I arrived at the hospital I was questioned by the police. I became aggravated quickly. I was still in a fog concerning the events. Questions like what happened and how did this happen eluded me. I didn't have a clue. I took out my wallet to give them my id. I took a second glance at it wondering why my name looked different. I've showed my id a million times for identification but somehow, I couldn't recognize myself. The picture looked like a total stranger to me. Pieces of my memory slowly channeled back. "Are you okay?" the officer asked, holding his hand out for my id. My name, why did I second guess my name? Did I have amnesia or was I just losing my mind here?

A woman came running through the main door straight to the room I was in. I looked at her as she leaned down to my face and kissed it softly.

"Are you ok hun?" She asked, her eyes were watered with tears. Obviously, I meant something to her and she to me. My wife. Yet I looked at her wondering what her name was. Did we have kids? She hugged me and looked up at the nurse standing near me. "Is he going to be ok? What happened?" She asked, looking around at the police for answers.

"Yes, he will be fine." The nurse assured her. The police quickly handed me my id and left.

I still felt out of place. I felt weird. My arm was burning as the nurse wrapped it in bandages. After several tests, I was free to go. My wife loaded me in the car in silence. I'm sure she too felt the awkwardness of what I could not explain. As we traveled home, I glanced out the window, still wondering about the accident. I was confused. I knew I was going to be out of work for a while. The doctor said that my arm was broken and quickly prescribed me several medications for pain. When we arrived home the neighborhood felt different. Even when I got inside of the house it felt like it belonged to someone else. My wife had set up my bed in the living room. I lay there looking around. Everything seemed so strange, yet so convenient. Already ready and prepped.

The doorbell sounded and immediately a man walked in with my wife. I struggled to sit up. “Derrek how's it going? You're lucky you're still alive!"

"Who are you?" I asked, wondering who this stranger was.

"I had a gut feeling you wouldn't remember me." He sat in the chair in front of me. “I'm your doctor, Doctor Miller," he responded. " I wanted to stop by and check on you, especially after the accident'"

I looked at him confused.

I remembered seeing a doctor, but I couldn't really remember what it was for.

"Ok maybe you can tell me what's going on? Is it amnesia or something?"

"No Derrek it's something else. It's called Jamais Vu have you heard of that before?"

“Jamais Vu?" I asked confused. I braced myself, ready for him to explain to me in detail.

"Jamais Vu, don't you mean Deja Vu.?" I asked thinking Doctor Miller was confused about the meaning.

"No Jamais Vu is an experience opposite to déjà vu. They call it Jamais Vu. It's when you meet the same people or visit places, again and again, but each time is the first. Everybody is always a stranger. Nothing is ever familiar."

That is a famous quote from Chuck Palahniuk.

So, the situations you are experiencing make you believe it's happening for the first time. Like the car crash that just happened to you. You were in a car crash about two years ago, but you weren't injured.

I never knew I was in a car crash, yet somehow the memory was starting to come back.

"I'll let you get some rest Derrek you're going to need it"

He wrote yet another prescription for me.

"Make sure he takes his medicine.: He nodded at my wife.

" I'll check in on you in about a week." he said walking out the room with my wife. I watched them continue talking as she escorted him to the door. They both looked back at me strangely satisfying. His smirk and nod scared me slightly.

About a week later while attending therapy, I explained to Mrs. Garcia I was experiencing something called Jamais Vu. Although she had heard of it, she wasn't aware of what it entailed. I explained to her what the doctor told me. I then asked her how long she thought this therapy would take before I was healed.

"Oh, not long" she answered. "It didn't take long the last time." The last time I thought, I haven't been here before. I shook my head at her.

"Same exercises my dear." She replied, instructing me to lift my arm above my head.

This weekly process continued, and I soon was back to work. Sore yet vaguely feeling like myself again.

"Will you be home soon?" My wife Linda asked me as I closed my laptop.

"Yes love, I'm on the way. I should be home in about 40 minutes, depending on traffic."

"Great," she said "And honey."

"Yes, " I answered quickly

"Don't forget to take your medicine."

"I won't," I assured her grabbing my bottle of water and popping the pain pill in my mouth. I then gathered my coat, clicked my office lights and walked quickly to catch the elevator before it closed.

I pulled out the parking garage and made the quick left on Main Street to hit the highway

I reached down to turn up the volume on the radio and a loud screeching noise met my eardrums. I looked up. yelled and snatched my wheel suddenly to avoid the truck heading my way!

My whole body was throbbing and full of pain I could barely move my body.

"You've been in an accident." The paramedic spoke looking down at me.