The Forecast Not Looking Too Good For Me

I’m looking out the window to check on the weather. I can’t say that I’m looking forward to doing anything special out there. I’m wearing one of those gift wrapped ankle bracelets I was plea deal agreement given to by a Superior Court Judge in Los Angeles, California, not because I like to take things from people, places and Art Museums that don’t belong to me.

Thinking about the forecast outside of my condo window “write” now. It was a day similar to this day, a dark forecast with thunderstorms on the horizon. That was the kind of day I needed to break into a Kay Jewelers like establishment in the warehouse district of Des Moines, Iowa.

Des Moines is one of those cities doing a fabulous job gentrifying its downtown area. I got stuck there when someone clipped me of my wallet or the young lady I invited to Skips Restaurant/Bar for drinks at 4000 Fleur Drive, Des Moines, Iowa 50321-2322. Rapunzel (Her real name is Brazil Barber and she's from Richmond, Virginia 23173), may have slipped me a mickey while we wined and dined in my suite room 1213 at the Hilton Des Moines Downtown, 435 Park Street, Des Moines, IA 50309. When I awoke fully dress I was as dizzy as codycross and my wallet and car keys were missing.

I got a thing about knowing addresses and zip codes. I guess you could say it can prevent an occupational hazard not knowing them.

I was quite surprise to see so many same sex married people in Des Moines. I later discovered that tidbit while reporting my wallet being stolen located at Des Moines County Clerk of Court. P.O. Box 158 Burlington, IA 52601.

Rapunzel was using my ID and credit cards doing some nefarious things and with my 2019 Spider car, that I had to clear up before moving on.

It was a little known fact that Iowa was the third state in the country and first state outside New England to legalize same-sex marriage, after Massachusetts and Connecticut. As the state capital Des Moines is out and proud, and the city’s Pridefest draws thousands every year in a celebration of expression and acceptance.

You wouldn’t have never even thought of Iowa of allowing same sex marriages to take place in all places especially when the average American thought Iowa was just known for their what we all thought was corn, county fairs, cows, tractors, the American Gothic House in Eldon, Iowa, 52554, biscuit bakers and farming people.

An emerging industry in the Greater Des Moines area is fiber optics telecommunications, which is expected to replace conventional communications systems. The Iowa Government employs a substantial portion of the city's work force, with the state of Iowa being among the largest employers.

I don’t care if Alexander Graham Bell himself offered me a good paying job in Des Moines. I was leaving on the first jet smoking from Des Moines International Airport, 5800 Fleur Dr. Des Moines, Iowa 50605.

As soon as I cashed in on the jewelry I’d steal and sell to Mr. Randall my fence. A fence may be a retail store owner or a jewelry broker. The fence will convert the stolen gems into cash by either selling them in a retail establishment to an innocent purchaser or by melting the stolen jewelry into new pieces to be sold. My fence was a slimly 480 pound waxed mustached wearing slob who wore one of the 10x loupe around his corpulent neck like a gold chain.

I can’t say that I was born to be a thief. The thought of stealing didn’t take place in my thought process until I graduated from Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT), located at 77 Massachusetts Avenue, Cambridge, MA 02139. While a few of my brainiac colleagues and I were watching the movie Ocean’s 11 on DVD. That proverbial light bulb went off above my head. I put it aside until after graduation.

I knew more about security systems and how they operated better than Brinks Security who by the way offered me an lucrative position with their company.

My first rule of thumb was to work alone. Those days, there is honor among thieves have been long gone. The first one caught would sing better than a canary. Rule number 2. No violence or weapons. If caught you get no sympathy from no judge or jury.

There are certain things I would use to see if I would rob a jewelry store or outlet. A lot of stores put major displays in the window so you can’t see in. That was good for me. A robber doesn’t want anybody to see in the store. I don’t want to have someone riding by or walking by or window shopping to see me and my flashlight taking down a store. I would also look at the sun and when you could see in the window during what times of the day. That could be protection for me because then people couldn’t see in the store. I generally liked to do my larceny at night maybe only having to deal with late night security.

While casing the place I would most assuredly be relieving the proprietor of his or her valuable goods. When I went in, dressed as if I worked on Wall Street I would always look at whether the jeweler produced the “box” of loose stones. I would ask for rings and if he produced the box, then I could pretty much calculate what was in there. If he brought out the box right away, I knew the guy wasn’t on the ball.

My main purpose for entering a place was to check the locations of the video cameras and where the safe was located. It would save me a lot of time.

It was raining like cats and dogs the night of the jewelry heist. Perfect conditions as I cleverly dismantled the security cameras and alarms. I knew there would be two vicious German pinchers guarding the place as if they owned a part of the business, so I made the two of them a meal they couldn’t refuse. They would be knocked out before they could bark backwards from 100 to 92. I was in and out of the place in less than five minutes. I hauled in over $230,000 of jewelry and gold retail. That cheap skate Randall gave me 170,000 cash money.

All I could say was California here I come.

I don’t want to leave you mentally hanging about not telling you why I’m now wearing a bracelet on my ankle. That petty thief Rapunzel had finally got caught doing who knows what and implemented me as a partner to her shenanigans.

When I arrived at LAX, 6201 West 96th Street, Los Angeles, Ca. 90045. I was arrested for being part of a robbery of a Baskin Robbins 31 flavors ice cream parlor.

If it hadn’t been for me reporting  my Id stolen and car. Things could have turned out a lot worse. In truth I was wearing the uncomfortable bracelet because I was a few payments behind on my alimony payments.