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Creative Nonfiction Mystery Thriller

(Warning: Depressing content ahead. Only readers with a strong heart can be recommended)

 (All characters and places are fictional)

DAY 1:

 Unconsciousness, mumbling…..

Where am I? a cold touch stirring all over. I can’t see anything. It's so dark. Mom? Dad? Are you there? Anyone? It is so cold. I want to go home. Faint!!!

Light dissipates. Blurred vision!! Hailey started observing her surroundings. Why does it feel like time has stopped? It's so foggy here. There are only branches of trees. Where am I? I am so scared. Did I got lost during camping? Where are others? My body feels heavy, it's really hard to move. Aah!! It feels like thousands of ants are biting me. It's painful. My hands, its color is changing. My feet are swelling. Maybe it's too cold. I know, I am damn sure it is because of the cold. It always happens to me in the winter but why am I out here in my school dress. I better go home. Home? But where is my home? A sharp headache. Faint!!

(Sudden consciousness)

Awake by howling sounds. Oh no!! Is it wolves here? No, I might be hallucinating. I am hungry. My backpack. (Scribbled the whole backpack) and she found a sandwich!! What is happening? I can't eat my sandwich. She saw her right hand- motionless. Did I hurt my arm? no strength? Sob, sob. She stood up and started moving. Hailey walked over a few miles and saw a pond. Thank Goodness, "there is a pond". I was so thirsty at least I can have some water now. She walked close to the pond and dropped her left arm into the water and got a cut. Suddenly blood started rushing beneath her hand. She got scared. Oh no!! She started running with all her might. Chanting prayers, "Please Lord' save me, I need you, I am humbly calling you out…she ran to a huge tree and hid in its core.

I know its a dream, it's just a bad dream. I will wake up soon. She pinched her cheeks. Slapped herself. Wake up. Please someone wake me up. Please Lord help me. She slept while crying.

DAY 2:

Hailey..my dear Hailey come here my darling. A voice echoed. Hailey started awakening .who? Grandma? Grandma, are you calling me. Where are you?. Hailey gained some consciousness and started following the voice. She started shivering, moving forward she saw her fiddle. She tried to touch the fiddle but her hand swung from the empty phase. She looked at her hands. She went in shock and her hands were gone. She took a few steps back and started running to the opposite side. She crossed the river and saw a beautiful big tree emitting light on the ground but there were strange birds which were hovered in the sky.

She took a deep breath and decided to see. Suddenly, the thunderstorm started. She rushed forward to save herself from getting wet and fell into a pit. Straight on something!! When she saw the person lying on the floor. She screamed. A scream, it was herself lying on the floor. All her strength started shattering NO, no this can't be. Her breathing became Irregular, she started sobbing, choking. She was powerless and she couldn't take it anymore. Her eyes starters shutting down. She became desperate, restless, tears were dwindling from her beautiful eyes. Why me? Why me? She fainted.

Suddenly, she felt that someone was pulling her. She was giving in. She stopped fighting and said in a croaked voice, “Please let me go, I want to sleep, Please leave me alone. I am tired. Tired of everything. Please leave me.

DAY 3:

My head- Hailey waked up because of the beautiful whispers surrounding her, she was unable to see clearly but she could feel the birds swinging around her, the smell of flowers. The soothing waterfall and the lovely chirping. She truly hoped of all this to come true. She smiled like a fool. I thought I was at a place called nowhere. But why is everything so beautiful now? Where does it come from? It's so pretty. My body is not heavy anymore. She giggled.

She started following butterflies and came afar. Where the hay went, did it turn into a day? I am back at home. No, this place is more beautiful than at home. She walked forward and saw that big tree again but this time it was not emitting light on the ground, instead it was dispersing the light all over. She went close and touched the source of light. Suddenly, everything started moving fast. All the amnesias started bounding. It was like a book flipping its pages and going backward. The withered trees were blooming. The birds started drifting around her and everything turned white.

(PRESENT - At the hospital)

A beautiful girl in her teen years lying on the bed senselessly surrounded by Doctors and family.

"Hailey, my baby, can you listen to your Mumma once. Please come back my darling. I promise you I will send you on camping but you have to come back first. Hailey, please. Mother crying near the bed and dad chanting prayers," Gracious Father, your holy Word tells us that our times are in your hands. Hear our prayers.

Doctors trying to comfort the family,’ There is very little hope for Hailey. Please prepare for the worst.

No, Hailey's mother lost her mind. This can't be true. Please doctor save my Hailey. Please, I request you. It was not her fault, please blame me. Please, doctor. Please, God. Help me. Only if I would have said yes to the camping. Only if. She started crying. She was desperate, there was nothing she could do. Father started crying seeing her pitiful appearance and the beautiful soul lying on the bed.

Suddenly, a low voice Mum, Dad. Hailey groaned in pain, Dad stopped the prayer. Both rushed to Hailey. Doctor. Doctor!! Mum called. Hailey my sweety Dad said. Can you hear us? Hailey Mum held her hand.

Hailey said, "Where am I? Where is the tree? My hands are back? What happened to me?

“My baby, you dropped your fiddle and rushed to pick that up and got hit by a Truck”. Mum said.

Hailey: Mum, where is my Fiddle? The one which grandma gave me.

Mother, “ It's not here anymore. It's broken!!

Hailey: I will get it and smiled

Dad: Hailey no! You would be fine

Mother: Hailey, don’t say like that

 Beep-Beep-Beep

The line on the monitor started getting straight.

Doctor: Nurse Charge once

Hailey: Mum- Dad, it was my fault, I was too stubborn. Please live a good life.

Beep-Beep-Beep

 Doctor: Again Charge twice

Hailey: I am sorry!!!

 Doctor: Charge thrice

Mum- Dad together: Hailey NOOO!!

Crying noises. Dad fell on the floor. Mum hugged Hailey,' My baby"

Doctors covered the white sheet!!!

September 14, 2020 07:08

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1 comment

Charles Stucker
08:35 Sep 24, 2020

Critique Circle This gives the impression of Stream of Consciousness technique. You shift back and forth between first (I did) and third (he did) person POV. Was it deliberate? "Please Lord' save me, I need you, I am humbly calling you out…she ran to a huge tree and hid in its core.- even in a dream, close the quotation marks. Hailey started awakening .who?- Should this look like - Hailey started awakening. "Who?" - or perhaps - Hailey started awakening. who? The misplaced period does not add to stream of consciousness effect. He...

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