Path of Stars

The course sand scraped beneath my belly, salty foam lapping and tugging at me from behind. Trying to take me back.

Memories burned behind an invisible wall. Long, dark shapes flung themselves into the sand within my field of shadowy vision. Water rushed up around me again, dragging at the limbs behind me. I blinked, my eyes focusing a little more each second. A whoosh scraped it’s way from my lungs, seared my throat, and retched through my gaping mouth. Seawater poured in a dribble down my chin and caught in my lanky hair. 

Inch by inch, I dragged my life away from the hungry sea until the waves only splashed at my toes. I flipped over, peeking toward the heavens. Clouds billowed roughly in the night, obscuring any fabled lights in the sky that purportedly should be able to point out a sense of direction. If you believed in that sort of thing, that is, pathways in the stars. My stomach clenched, the churning clouds indiscernible from the roiling waves from which I’d just escaped. 

My eyes shut tightly, but it only made the sounds more intense. The angry wind whistled through things that rustled and creaked, merging with the crash and thunk of the sea. My chattering teeth joined the cacophony.

I couldn’t stay here, knew that death waited for me now as surely as if I’d stayed behind. I couldn’t have come all this way for nothing. 

Get up, you idiot. Up!

CRASH.

My eyes flew open. A cerulean sky peeked between a canopy of green fingers, an orange sun beating a striped pattern upon my face. Hope collided with breath on its way up inside me. I blinked wildly, shielding my eyes as tears sprang into the corners and overflowed. 

CRASH.

I jerked into a sitting position in time to see another pillar tilt toward the earth, the impact sending up billions of dust motes into the air. Strange things escaped from its springy bladed hat just before impact. I watched their black arrowhead shapes take to the skies with wonder. They seemed familiar somehow, some long forgotten name just beyond the touch of memory. Envy pierced my gut as I observed them soar away with ease. 

My eyes turned back to my surroundings, hidden before in the dim light. I lay partially covered in a bed of dead foliage. The stuff littered the ground, in the middle of a grove of the towering pillars. Trees, my subconscious found the word. They were trees. I had seen a tree before somewhere, a short, brown scraggly things, nothing like these. My gaze slid up the oddly ringed trunks, eyeing their mop tops hopefully for any sign of more of the flying things. 

Instead, a pair of large eyes peered out at me from the nest of bushy growth at the base of the fronds. I stared back, frozen in place. Ever so slowly, the yellow eyes blinked and a face protruded out. A pointed snout ended in a little black nose. The eyes were ringed in perfectly symmetrical white and black circlets, expanding out until they met two gigantic ears perched atop it’s furry head. Delicate black humanoid hands pushed past the brush as it stared down, obviously trying to decide whether I was friend or foe.

I stood to get a closer look, but my sudden movement must have frightened the creature into believing the latter. The last I saw was a long, dextrous tail disappearing into the depths of the tree.

I stepped carefully over the dense thicket, stout tube-like poles stacked together, little wisps of fluttering leaves dancing in the humid breeze. I hesitated, unsure if I were heading back in the direction I’d come, then realized it really didn’t matter. The vegetation thinned and I arrived back on the edge of a beach. Whether it was the same one or different, it all seemed the same.

The sweeping sky met the horizon, as though stitched together in a patchwork world made entirely out of the various hues of blue. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the odd sky, frowning with distrust. How were you supposed to ever tell the difference if everything looked the same? At least back home, you knew where you stood.

A wave crashed against the rocky shore. I watched the spray glisten over the jagged peaks before the water was sucked back out. My eyes roved the sea from one side to the other. I couldn’t help the twinge in my stomach at the emptiness I found.

Second star to the right and straight on till morning.

Laughter bubbled out of me wildly. How odd. I hadn’t thought about that since I was a child. My mother had encouraged fantasies, but my father had stamped it out when he learned she had been reading me such nonsense. She had whispered them to me anyway each night from memory. That one about the child who could fly and lived in a place of beauty and adventure had stuck with me through the years. I turned half-way to look at the swaying trees behind me with heavy doubt. 

Could this be my Neverland?

A yellow eye peeked out from behind a tree. I crouched immediately and he shrunk back behind the trunk, like an anemone retreating from the lightest touch. My calves burned in the uncomfortable position, but I dared not move. Ever so slowly, the face peered out again. 

I remained still as a statue. The furry face was proceeded by an equally furry body. It moved on all fours, despite its vaguely human-like body. It slinked forward before it finally stopped three feet away. It froze, front paw in the air, before slouching down on its haunches. The nimble tail curled around to the front. It dragged its luminous eyes away from my own and began picking tiny insects from its fur, as though trying to ignore that I was encroaching on its space.

Was it some kind of advanced human species, evolved from the first travelers who set out this way? Or was it some kind of native version that knew nothing of the real world? The eyes and fear hinted at human emotion and intelligence. I cleared my throat. 

“Do you speak?” I asked, my voice hoarse.

The poor creature bounced back a few paces in surprise, hair rising along the ridge of its back. It hissed in warning as I reached out.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean anything. I just - ”

The hope that had been building inside of me deflated. I knew it. This wasn’t my own kind. If anything, it was a glorified version of the mangy cat my neighbor back home had kept as part pet, part rodent deterrent. In my desperation, I had degraded myself to the lowest possible tier…the animal talker. That old man had muttered sweet nothings to the flea-bitten feline, lured it with the promise of food in hope for reciprocated companionship and love. My father had told me, “Look at him. When man gives deference to that of the beast, he is truly lost.” It was the path of madness and I had just fallen in its clutches.

Anger swooped in where the hope had been. My eyes shot to the sand at my feet, zeroing in on an egg-sized rock. Sand ground beneath my nails as I yanked it from its warm bed.

“Get out of here!” I screeched, throwing the rock in the animal’s direction. It bolted, terrified more by the piercing sound of my voice than the object. Like a flash of thought, it was gone.

I was tugging in breaths in rapid bursts, unable to let them out. Pricks of light popped in my vision and my head swam drunkenly. The fresh air filling my lungs felt like a cruel trick, a soft breeze the gentle caress of a lie. They’d promised we could find it, that such a place existed. A place with clean air, clean water, life. 

But they never said I’d have to face it alone.

I laid there until my breathing slowed. Drowsiness set in as the heat seeped in through my back and exhaustion won over. When I finally snapped back awake, it was with a clear mind at last. A dogged acceptance settled into my bones and I stood with a determination I at least told myself I felt. I made a large X in the sand where I stood and set out along the shore.

I spent the rest of that afternoon casing my new home. Walking the length of the island back to where I had begun in the space of one turn of the sun meant i was sure I was the only one here. No fellow travelers, old or new. Just me. If there had ever been anyone before me, they were long gone. My only hope was that I wouldn’t be the last, resolved to survive until that was a reality.

One day blended into the next. Sunny days ended in stormy nights, drenching this forsaken spit of land in a deluge of life-saving water. It pooled in the pond I had constructed near a cobble of scraggly rocks and trees. Even as I stared at the little safe-haven I had built, it was with no sense of joy or belonging. I merely existed, waiting for the next moment. Ever so often, the little furry beast would scamper above in the treetops, as though wondering what my deal was. He always lurked, whether I saw him or not, the feeling of eyes constantly following me day and night announcing his presence. He never came closer and I never tried to lure him to me again.

That is, until that one night.

I’m not sure what woke me. I knew it was still well before sunrise, but a brightness cascaded down into my shelter through a crack, which was steadily growing wider. Still half asleep, it dawned on me that, if there was a hole in the ceiling, I should be getting doused with rain. I patted at my face, my chest, my arms. I was completely dry. 

I looked up again with an eagerness that had lain dormant since my first day here. Down through the tiny hole stared those familiar glowing orbs. They watched me uneasily. I opened my mouth, then snapped it closed. A vision of my father taking a swipe at that damned cat as it cowered on our front porch filled my mind. Our neighbor had passed expectedly a few nights before and it was the first I’d seen the scruffy thing since. Desperate for food, it must have been making the rounds. No longer able to fend for itself, I also believed it was equally as starved of the affection for which it had grown accustomed. 

“Get out!” my father had shouted. “Or I’ll skin you next!”

Back in my shelter, my eyes found the feeble stash of fruits and insects. I’d gathered them after much trial and error, leading alternately to horrible bouts of sickness or a full belly. I glanced back at the round eyes and moved toward the bowl carved into the rock. A click and rustle of feet told me the creature had once again scampered away. I settled on my feet with a slump, no longer bothering to move quietly, I grabbed a long, yellow thing from the stash, biting off a large chunk. I was still chewing thoughtfully when a snap of a twig at the entrance made my head jerk up. 

There he sat, a hand resting on the entry frame, just like a miniature human again. I chewed, waiting to see if he’d bolt, but he just stared right back. I reached behind me, finding one of the round-shaped fruits with my fingertips. I waved it to show him like it made any difference and very gently rolled it toward the opening. It bounced and bumbled over the damp ground before settling at his feet. 

My eyebrows raised in surprise. Not a bad throw.

It reached down to its feet and brought the fruit suspiciously to its nose. With a sudden ferocity, it began to strip the fruit down to the pulp. I watched in fascination. 

The bitter skin hadn’t agreed with me and I’d been avoiding them ever since. I stared down at the yellow thing in my hands and wedged my finger between the soft innards and fibrous husk. It stripped back with surprising ease. 

Huh, I thought, looking back at the creature. Clever little guy.

With the skin gone, his nimble little fingers pried the fruit apart. He ate ravenously, juice dripping down his front in a trail of beads. Round and round the fruit swirled in his mouth before he swallowed. We ate and we stared. I gazed at the long shadow he threw against the ground, again wondering at the source of the light. 

Second star to the right and straight on till morning.

The yellow peel dropped from my numb fingers. The creature flinched at the noise, but didn’t run off this time.

“Stars?” 

When I glanced up through the hole, I couldn’t get a clear view of the sky, just the glow of light filtering through the trees. I looked back at him and saw that he gazed heavenward, too. Was it merely mimicry or did he truly understand? He swallowed his last bite as he turned back to me.

“Stars?” I whispered again, but to him this time, as though I expected him to understand. He dropped back on all fours and turned away. I expected him to make his escape like normal, but he stopped after a few paces, waiting. Uncertain if I’d scare him by following, I stepped forward. He did move away, but not at a run, as though this was what he wanted. 

We moved through the dense jungle. I kept checking to see if I could catch a clean glimpse of the night sky, but the swaying treetops seemed determined to keep it hidden. I recognized the trail the creature was leading me through, taking me back to my beach.

As it wound into view, the white sand was blinding in its brightness. Diamonds of light danced on the water, soft waves sloshing in lazy drifts. And out past them, near the horizon, I saw my very first star.

I froze and the outline of the creature stilled, too. For a moment, all I could do was look at the flickering shape as it winked back at me. But I knew from my stories that there were more stars than any one person could count in a lifetime and my feet surged forward. The black silhouette of my creature scampered away, but I was too eager to slow down. 

My feet skidded on sand, sending a spray toward the reaching ocean. My head tilted back, following the shimmering path from my star to overhead and beyond my inconsequential island. The sheer enormity of the night sky brought tears to my eyes, making the dense clusters of stars merge and blur. Starlight and moonlight cascaded down from a clear, deep black sky, coating the island in their silver glow. 

I could have stayed there forever, not noticing the crick forming in my neck or stiffness in my joints. The moon and stars did their cosmic dance until a lightening on the horizon made their magic begin to melt away. A brush of fur against my leg startled me out of my reverence and the warmth there disappeared. I found my little friend waiting by my side, like that forlorn cat, like me, willing to accept love or pain if it meant no longer being alone. 

Slowly, I slunk to the ground, eyes averted, legs crossing beneath me, and waited. The shift of sand and the patter of little feet lead to soft pressure on my thigh. He curled in my lap, his bulbous eyes finally looking up into my own.

“Hi,” I said, letting a small smile spread across my face. He looked at me sourly, as though this were beneath him, but his head rested down on my knee and his eyes drifted steadily closed. I very much wanted to stroke the fur on the back of his ears, to see if it were really as soft as it appeared. Instead, I turned my eyes back toward the horizon in time to see something that could have very well been the figment of my imagination.

The longer I stared, the more I realized it really was there. A mass of sails, the curve of a hull. I looked incredulously at the snug form buried in my lap. His eyes peeked up at me in slits, his mouth drawn down at the corners, as if to say, “I told you so.” I barked a little laugh as I looked back to the materializing ship. It was just where my first star had appeared, which I would never have seen if not for my new friend coming to wake me in the night. 

Keeping my legs crossed, I leaned back to lay my back flat against the sand, arms linking behind my head in a makeshift pillow. Ever so slowly, I untangled one hand from the other, reaching down toward my lap. I stroked his soft fur gently and his head pushed further into my hand. 

I grinned.

As dawn arrived, my eyes once again found the dim pinpricks of light overhead that still revealed the hints of the night sky, lurking just out of reach. I knew they would appear evermore, night after night, in the future that had turned into a possibility, now that I was no longer alone.