Lessons of the Pixie

Pixies are always hated in folklore, fiction, fantasy. But we are as real as those Funions you are eating right now or your new Prius. The only way to become a mischievous pixie-like me is to go to school for it. What, you thought pixies just randomly are mischievous or have vendettas. No, we come in all fields and walks of life. There is a school dedicated to pixies and we get to major in what we want. I even went to this school when I was a young briny little thing but I was shaped into the mischievous little being that I am because of the school for pixies. And yes I majored in mischievous studies so I became a professor at this fine establishment.

The school for pixies resides east London and we are not 5 inches, most of us are as tall as you mortals, we just have elegant pixie wings. We live in the shadows, our mischievous nature, and jobs overshadowed by your mortal ones but as you might not know the clown in the room or the elephant as most of you might say are there are some very prominent pixies out there. Now I teach mischievous studies and today we have a field day as today is April 1st, my classes’ favorite holiday.

My classroom was very talkative today as they talked on and on about which pranks they were going to be doing. My classroom had a long greasy chalkboard, a desk in the center, and a Poster with the best prankster in the world, Virginia Woolf who dressed up as a prince on a British naval ship and got away with it till a couple of days after she left the ship, it even made front-page news.

I walked into the classroom as all of my pupils stopped what they were doing, stood up, and bowed to me. I bowed back to them as they took their seats. To me, they were children with angelic and pixie features that would make even the best celebrity swoon for me. And yes if you must ask we have all walks of life, we have gay, Trans, female, male, and even the smartest children from their primary and secondary schools. It does not matter at our school as we care about teaching all rather than a select few. It should not stop someone from receiving their degree in whatever field they like because of something they cannot control.

“Hello Class;” I said setting down my papers, written in leaflets down on my oaken desk with mahogany finish.

“Good Morning, Miss Taneisha.” They all spoke in harmony as they took their seats in the open desks that we created for our pupils.

I paused as I slowly handed out their field day assignments for the assignment. They were supposed to prepare a mischievous prank to do to the poor fools down in London. I watched as they started to fill out their paperwork for me.

“As you know today is a big day for you students as it is a field day. We rarely get these but especially on this favorite day of mine. Now let’s get down to business; this assignment is 25% off your whole grade as it is as important to receiving your degree within a short couple of months as anyone of you would. Now, we have little time to waste my mischievous pupils. To become a mischievous pixie-like me and cause pranks and mayhem on the day that we worship is to understand the safety and principles of such a prank.” I spoke looking at every one of them.

They all choked trying to think of a plan for their task. All of them were excellent students but this is the main reason to get a degree, you have to be cunning, mischievous, even elaborate on your pranks whether in the real world of ours. I collected their sheets checking off on their approved pranks and nodding to every one of them.

I paused as they all dreaded this task.

“I see all of you are choking upon it. It is okay to feel this way but don’t be. It is a fun task and you get to use your skills and abilities to trick the tricksters. Only two people in the history of this assignment have ever failed this assignment and yes they still graduated with top honors in my class, because this assignment can be overthought.

“When I was in this class, over a hundred years ago, we did not have a holiday like this or an assignment like mine. We did not get to do field days, we had to prank each other and when I pursued education to broaden the spirits, the headmaster thought my ideas were careless at first. He too was a mischievous study major. Well, this Holiday symbolizes all of us to not always be so stubborn, hardheaded or stuck in a 9 to 5 job.

“Some of you are only taking my class as elective, but you see my fellow pupils to truly understand the Jester, the Joker, and the mischievous little boy is to understand that it is okay to have one day in the year to be silly, to giggle, to laugh, and be laughed at if it is all in good fun. My class has taught you many things. You learned what the essence of a joke was and compared it to a prank, you learned how minimal pranks and larger pranks have different combative factors and you learned the history behind this whole class’s madness. Now it is time for my pupils to put this to a test and see if you can pass the true art of being a mischievous pixie in London. Now any questions?” I asked them as one of my best pupils' hands shot up like wildfire, her name was Athena.

Athena was not the one to be pranked by. For our first project, she pranked me but back then she was just a sprout. Now she is a full blossomed pixie ready for the real world of pranking.

“But Professor, what if we are caught?” Athena asked stoically.

“Good question Athena, your safety is in my hands, is it not?” I asked as she slowly nodded unapologetically.

They all nodded to me. A couple of pupils moved uncomfortably in their chairs as they waited for my response.

“Well, I have some rules that apply to all of you including me. Have your wings hidden at all times. Do not get caught, do not be seen, and if you have to disappear, meaning use your abilities to disappear. These grades are passing or fail so I do warn you, it takes a lot to fail this field assignment, like those two students you will learn that real-world application is harder than in classroom application. You will be graded on the prank itself, the essence of the prank, and on peer evaluation. You were paired at random to do your pranks, for safety reasons. Now come along students, we have lots to do and little time to do them.” I said as I did the lifting motion with my hand.

My students slowly got up nervously as they all followed me out one by one to the courtyard.

We all walked out and with a snap of our fingers disappeared to reappear in east London by the Sherlock museum. The streets were crowded, a light fog had rolled in and the people were scurrying inside. I sent my pupils off to go and grade their work.

I found Athena first who was doing an excellent job at acting her part. She was slowly trailing behind strangers and then would yell loudly ‘Oh you found him. If they would ask, she would go on a rant about her imaginary pet goldfish. She had me cracking up, and those strangers were not that amused.

She handled it well. It was a classic but a simple classic that never gets olds. I nodded to her as she once again told a stranger that they found her missing imaginary pet goldfish. And she would give it new names each time. I believe one was Enrique, the other was Glendora and I think at one point it was Melanie.

I went on to her partner who was a genius if you ask me, same as Athena but she was only 12 years old and had an education degree in mischievous theorems. I loved her outtake for the assignment as only at a young age but made a name for her at one point teaching me a couple of things about new and improved pranks. She did something similar to her partners but elaborate and unique in its admiration.

She sat on a curb cuddling a stuffed animal crying into it and if a stranger came up to her and asked her about it, she would tell them that her stuffed animal ruined her life and he owed her money for it. They would slowly walk away looking at her odd.

I told them to go back to the school for their next classes as I gave them their grades; passes. Athena was overjoyed and loved it and her partner was over the moon. They snapped their fingers disappearing into the midafternoon rain that addressed us.

My other students were all over the place with their mischievous acts. One of my students walked out of the London Zoo yelling that he was free, that he was free. I nodded to him sending him back to the school. I had many more students to look for like a couple of them did simple pranks like a run-away magic show. Someone went into a bush and yelled For Narnia. I was cracking up laughing as he came out with a little lion's head. My students went above and beyond to prank the streets of London with beads, pranks, and jokes for all that can see.

Another student trying to plant birdseed, saying they will grow into birds someday if he thinks hard and another even using a poster he printed from a mortal printer, going ‘have you seen this man’ and it was a picture of him.

Some of these people laughed and thanked some of my pupils, others were hard-headed and would scowl at the very thought of it. But then my pupils would remind them what day it was and some would be changed by it.

After all of the jokes aside and pranks ended; I had to do my prank. I only have to say that no one failed this assignment. It was a hard day for all but pranks can be hard or easy.

        I came back to the school with my last batch of students. The headmaster was there talking to my students who were all cheery. I could tell the headmaster was pleased with the talk of my little project.

        “Taneisha, another great year of lessons I presume.” The headmaster remarked.

“Of course, likewise,” I said shaking his hand with a joy buzzer in my palms.

He shook his head dragging his hand away from mine.

“Always sir, well it is time for my students to go to their other classes. See you again sometime.” I whispered waving bye to him and my other students.

I walked back to my classroom with my next class waiting for the ultimate prank and to repeat the process. My next class has been in the advanced range. They have seen every prank I have given them or so far. I smiled walking into the class; they looked defeated as I all smiled as they had no chairs to sit on.

I walked in like everything was normal and with a snap of my fingers, the chairs reappeared like normal. The students were not as stunned so I took full force with this one. I smiled discarding their current lesson plan as I had pulled out their fake final.

“Hello, students today are a big day for all of you because instead of our usual Joke holiday selves we will be taking a test, which counts for 50% of your grade. “ I said with full authority, my wings fluttering.

They turned a 180 at that remark. They went from tired little fools to mad people who did not like the sound of a pop quiz. I smiled at that. Now of course this fake final was untrue and not real. How could I be so cruel if I admit it? But I wouldn’t do that to my students, I am not that cruel, just mischievous. Now there is a difference between being cruel and being mischievous. You just have to find the line between them.

“April fools, of course, see how mischievous pixies work. Now you all have been taught a lesson of the joke.” I said as all of them grabbed their chests smiling at that.

“And what is that? That was not a prank Miss Taneisha, which was just cruel.” One of the students in the back yelled.

“Chairs can vanish all the time but it takes time commitment and a bit of luster to make a true prank….” I whispered to them as I slowly smiled at them showing what a true prank was.

Pranks take time and energy. If this season you get pranked, think about the mischievous little pixie that is most likely behind this little crusade. Most jokes and pranks can be cruel but if it is all in fair fun, it should be taken as that. Take this day as a lesson to be silly and have fun as a good prank requires one.